Some of you may be familiar with the concept of "first world problems" or have seen the #firstworldproblems tag on Twitter. These are the problems that are so petty that if they're all that you have to complain about in life when billions of people are eating badly, drinking bad water or otherwise missing out on basic needs, then you must be pretty lucky.
But I think there should be a place for privileged douchebags with a sense of entitlement like me to carp and whinge about insignificant nonsense, so here goes:
- sometimes when I buy a takeaway coffee with a plastic lid, the tiny ventilation hole isn't big enough so I have to practically suck the coffee out through the drinking aperture (?) and it hurts my cheeks a little
- sometimes when I buy a croissant, the people making it toast it without asking me and I really hate that because it makes it very greasy, but I can't bring myself to tell them to give me an untoasted one
- there's an office cleaner who comes around at 8pm every night (while I am still working) and she insists on throwing the bottle bins around at a height and it's really noisy and it puts me off
- sometimes the business support people in my office don't treat my core business needs as more important than the requests of business support people
What are your problems?
I've almost run out of black pepper.
Nespresso capsules previously only ever went up to strength 10.
They have just released a strength 12 blend.
Have they never watched This is Spinal Tap?
11! it should be 11 you fools!
I'm not sure how to fill in the day.
To be honest, I can't be bothered to go out and buy some food.
The gimp I keep tied up in the basement has started to make a lot of noise recently.
I have to move from my "workstation" to make coffee
The Queen has a sent the heavies round to 'have a word' about eating her swans. i thought we had an understanding. Royal etiquette? Its a minefield
Sometimes I take a knife out of the dishwasher and it still has a little bit of dried-on food stuck to it
I'm out of coffee beans, and will not drink instant.
however joao, it is clean food so you can carry on and use the knife.
The other half doesn't seem to think its acceptable though.
F5 has broken on my keyboard so I have to use the mouse to refresh STW.
The gimp I keep tied up in the basement has started to make a lot of noise recently.
A lifetime ban from STW can be so upsetting, can't it?
As to my current problem, I need to nip to the shops for some more spray on waterproofer for my spare ski gloves. I've somehow run out.
There's loads [url= http://singletrackmag.com/forum/profile/mastiles_fanylion#user-threads ]here[/url] and [url= http://singletrackmag.com/forum/profile/molgrips#user-threads ]here[/url]
😉
My fluffer keeps complaining about wrist and neck cramp.
You only have one fluffer? There's your problem!
You only have one fluffer? There's your problem!
It's an austerity measure. 😕
This morning I got dressed and I thought I put on barely black tights. They're navy.
- sometimes when i go to put petrol in the car i clean the windscreen with the squeegees that they have but i only realise after i get back in that i haven't squeegeed properly and so it's worse than it was, and i get really upset
- sometimes when i buy coffee people who come after me swoop in and steal my drink because it's the same as their order, and then i have to to wait until their order is ready because i am too embarrassed to tell them they stole my drink
Oh Emsz! What a simply frightful Faux Pas!
You must be mortified!!!
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[/img] [/i]
posting gibberish instead of an image probably fits the thread title too 😉
I daren't leave my desk binners 😆
i'm trying to get thinner but i'm surrounded by tasty foods
Waitrose almost over charged me for my Financial Times
my housekeeper never hoovers/mops behind doors that are wedged open, despite me having subtly pointed this out to her by saying "could you make sure you clean behind open doors, i've noticed they're still a bit dirty, particularly in the bathrooms".
i'm at the end of my tether and don't know where to turn
🙂
The front of the sole of my shoe is coming off a little bit, and I can't decide whether to glue it myself or bite the bullet and pay for a re-sole.
sometimes when I buy a takeaway coffee with a plastic lid, the tiny ventilation hole isn't big enough so I have to practically suck the coffee out through the drinking aperture (?) and it hurts my cheeks a little
Poke it a bit with a biro.. come on.
Emsz.. don't talk about your tights please... I don't think I can handle it 🙂
Just remembered another one!
In BA Club (Business) Class, the port is ALWAYS too cold.
I am pleased to say, however, that in First, it is not.
BA Club sucks balls.
Truly.
Even people in the 3rd world would be able to identify the cost/quality imbalance there.
😉
- sometimes when I'm looking over someone's shoulder to read their text messages I see something I don't like and it makes me sad
- my husband took me to Center Parcs and now he's demanding a quid pro quo
I can't decide what tyres for the 1st world ...
F5 has broken on my keyboard so I have to use the mouse to refresh STW.
Try control-R.
You all may enjoy: [url= http://whitewhine.com/ ]White Whine - A collection Of First World Problems[/url]
I opened a packet of Chocolate Hobnobs today, but found out they were actually plain.
I fancied some plain Hobnobs but Tesco only had milk ones, so I got plain choc digestives instead.
😥
I got sent an iPad 1 case instead of an iPad 2 case and it doesn't fit properly.
F5 has broken on my keyboard so I have to use the mouse to refresh STW.
Have you considered using Alt + F4?
The remote control for my tele is broken, so I have to get up to change the channel.
The pop-up headlamp washers on my BMW don't 'pop-down' when they're finished.. it's quite humiliating..
There's nowhere to put my iPod in my new car. It keeps falling off the passenger seat.
Have you considered using Alt + F4?
You sound like my boss.
There's nowhere to put my iPod in my new car. It keeps falling off the passenger seat.
Caveat emptor Rodney
The bread I made toast with this morning was unevenly sliced, so one slice was more toasted than the other.
Infuriatingly, my new BMW has no where to rest your right foot when the cruise control is on.
Grr
There's nowhere to put my iPod in my new car. It keeps falling off the passenger seat.
Is that because you are driving too fast Dez? 😉
headfirst - Member
> http://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/cancelling-a-contract-change-in-service-what-law-do-i-need-to-quote
/p>POSTED 59 MIN
Oi!
[i]Is that because you are driving too fast Dez? [/i]
Like a freeekin [i]rocket[/i], man.
- My investment portfolio has tanked so I have to sell one of my £150k cars 🙁
- My downstairs iPad intermittently drops off the wifi network 🙁
- My cleaner is ill so I'm living in filth 🙁
T'other half tweaked open a ring-pull with my Wusthof........
I don't see how we'll survive this 😡
[i]my Wusthof[/i]
that's some sort of gun dog isn't it?
In BA Club (Business) Class, the port is ALWAYS too cold
As is the red wine. I have to give it to my fluffer to warm up.
I'm becoming increasing more angry every time I hear a documentary commentator describing events that have happened in the past in the present tense.
I dropped a piece of buttered toast on my office chair this morning, after cleaning it up I'm now having to sit on a nappy to protect my suit trousers from the damp area.
one is left wondering why KINGTUT keeps a supply of nappies at his office?
Left over from when my daughter used to come to work with my wife (who works with me).
The biros at work aren't proper genuine Bic biros, but a poor office supplier version. Horrible scratchy things
you work with your mummmy and she does your childcare as well...I think you need to spread your wings a little
kintut earlier
[img] [/img]
I have run out of Hummous...worse still I have no tahini so cant make any more
EDIT: DAMN YOU AND YOUR EDIT [shakes fist]- to be fair he did it before my post appeared
Thread of the year already.
A menu for a local sandwich shop has been left in the kitchen at work. Listed amongst their fare is "panini's."
Not only have they used an obvious greengrocer's apostrophe, but [i]panini is bloody well plural to start with.[/i] The cleaner is going to have her work cut out tonight, mopping up exploded Cougar off the walls.
Cos my internet is slow I experience a lot of lag when playing MW3 and therefore get killed a lot. Makes it very hard to improve my K/D rate 😡
I got some mud splashed onto one of the reversing sensors of my pointlessly large 4x4, and now it beeps annoyingly. I’ll have to get out of the car and clean the offending part – how frustrating.
Getting the right grade of granite for the work surfaces in my chalet is proving very difficult.
Miroku, Blaser or Browning? It’s just so [i]difficult[/i] to choose.
Sadly, all true.
The missus has only gone and purchased a glass bottle of ketchup instead of a squeezy one. I had to wait literally seconds before getting any sauce on my chips.
I nearly cried last night thinking about all the great music out there that I might never discover
Really
(well maybe not the actual crying bit)
I got a Waitrose card through the post last night, I'm not sure what it's for, cos it's not like a clubcard
I can't decide whether to get another cartoon mountain bike riding sheep tattooed onto my leg.
[i]I nearly cried last night thinking about all the great music out there that I might never discover[/i]
Just keep listening to the same old stuff you listened to 10 years ago. Works for most people 😉 (Carter USM, I ask ya!)
Carter? 10 years ago?
More like 20 😆
It's really irritating how they've changed the tagging system on here so that you can only add a tag when you make a post
Not even a jokey one this, but I get bewildered by the methods available to listen to music. I remember the days when you bought vinyl or a cassette, but now there's iTunes, Amazon, CDs, Spotify, Napster etc etc. The lines between broadcast radio and buying music are so blurry, and I just fear that one day I'll wake up and realise that vast music collection I thought I had has disappeared into the ether.
Fortunately I still have a shed load of vinyl and CDs to keep me going 😀
I bought a silk tie especially for my sister's wedding, but now she's asking the men to wear the same colours. It's such a dilemma.
I've almost run out of black pepper.
I read that as "run out of black people". I was most distressed until I realised there's plenty of Poles to take their place.
Signed - NickG
I got some mud splashed onto one of the reversing sensors of my pointlessly large 4x4, and now it beeps annoyingly. I’ll have to get out of the car and clean the offending part – how frustrating.
There are people who will do this for you you know
This is a mtb forum and no one has added:
26 or 29?
120mm or 140/150mm?
FS or HT?
Helmets - should they be legally enforced?
Should I ride on a footpath?
There are people who will do this for you you know
I know, but I wanted it done right then. I had to stop, take the car out of drive, get out of the car, determine which sensor had the mud globule on it, clean it, wipe my feet as I got back into the car, put it back into gear...it takes [i]so much time[/i].
I must have wasted very nearly a minute!
I've run out of fresh basil
I don't have any spare Maxtra filter cartridges for my kettle so my tea has scummy bits floating on the top
🙁
Still or sparkling?
One from Karl Lagerfeld a few years ago:
"I have nine houses, but I only need eight."
I forgot to take the bread out the machine when it had finished earlier on and I've now got a pastrami sandwich made of slightly warm, slightly soggy bread for lunch.
My cleaner keeps wiping down the silver candlesticks with a damp cloth which is making them tarnish.
I've run out of silver polish.