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??Mods?? if i put a link to my work page on here will i get in trouble..??
it comes from the fact that some men view their women as well their property.
I do feel the need to possess my partner. That's kind of why we got married and I am sure that she feels the same. She's mine, and I am hers and we are a unit and I like it. I'd be mortified if she ran away with some other bloke. Or a woman. or a TS m2F.
The only reasons I can think anyone would become a prostitute are because:
1) They couldn't do anything else
2) They were forced to do it
3) They want to do it
Being unable to extend your career beyond the basest of humans urges isn't particularly impressive and victim-hood requires help somewhat beyond dating. If they are doing it purely because they enjoy it, I think it would be pretty hard to get ones head around.
So no.
Has anyone asked Mumsnet what they think?
Or is this a Mumsnet troll?
Not expressing an opinion, just asking. 🙄
@muppetWrangler, interesting distinction...certainly more interesting that some of the gratuitous name calling.
??Mods?? if i put a link to my work page on here will i get in trouble..??
No idea, but I do know it will present a wonderful dilema on whether to click on it for the office workers on the forum! 😈
Hang on, I haven't labelled anyone as a commodity. I identified a few slang words for a prostitute and stated that I find the profession sleazy and morally repulsive (not just the sellers but the buyers too). It's nothing to do with sexism at all. I have also taken issue with the comparison of prostitutes with black and gay people, (and I do have a BIG issue with this).
My issue has been that it's somehow becoming viewed as OK to be a prostitute and I don't believe it is OK. Would you use (and that word is in context, not because I think they are [i]things[/i]) a prostitute? Plenty here think there's no shame in it.
Morally, are they doing something wrong?
In my opinion, yes it's wrong. I just couldn't respect anyone who (without being forced) sells the goods.
If there's a prize for "Least edifying thread of the week" then this is probably going to win it.
The only reasons I can think anyone would become a prostitute are because:1) They couldn't do anything else
2) They were forced to do it
3) They want to do it
Isn't that the same for any profession?
As for the idea of owning someone and being owned, as some have described their relationships, I personally find that repugnant.
Slightly OT, but my recent three year affair with an ex-lapdancer has sadly just come to an end. I miss her and her earlier life was of no consequence in our relationship.
I have always never had much trouble in finding a partner. I've been in stable relationships for over 20 years and had lots of fun before settling down sewing "wild oats"
Others I know struggle and maybe are not a successful with the laydeez. If it means they go to a working girl for a bit of fun where's the harm in that? They're not hurting anyone.
sten1 - MemberYou missed the point didnt you, i was saying it much safer and nicer from the girls point of view, its a different world, the girls on the streets do it for drugs while a girl with her own flat could be doing it for drugs, but then again they might want a new sofa and TV.
And the difference is what? Both are selling sex. If either is being forced by some else then they are as much a victim as their customers. If anyone, male or female "chooses" to be a sex worker then that is their business, but let's not pretend that society as a whole will be over the moon at their choice of career. Other peoples opinions will differ from yours.
Has anyone asked Mumsnet what they think?
😆
Slightly OT, but my recent three year affair with an ex-lapdancer has sadly just come to an end. I miss her and her earlier life was of no consequence in our relationship.
I miss you too oldboy, but I always told you that when Vegas called, I'd answer.
Toodooloo, my sweet potato! It was a lot of fun.
😉
There may be higher class prostitutes but they all let some stranger put his dick in them for money and I couldn't live with it.
Hang on a minute. If we cross out the "for money" bit, then that describes every normal woman who's ever been sexually active. Unless you go "urgh" at anyone who isn't a virgin, why's it make a difference whether she's done it for fun, desire, money, being bought dinner and a load of drinks, or a combination of those things?
??Mods?? if i put a link to my work page on here will i get in trouble..??
I'm not sure. Check via email maybe?
In my opinion, yes it's wrong. I just couldn't respect anyone who (without being forced) sells the goods.
Just as well they've never asked for your respect then, hey.
If i put a link to my work page on here will i get in trouble?
I think you have to pay to advertise on STW 😉
Others I know struggle and maybe are not a successful with the laydeez. If it means they go to a working girl for a bit of fun where's the harm in that? They're not hurting anyone.
Good point. What if these [i]others[/i] are in their 50s or 60s? What if they aren't flush so go a bit low rent and recruit from their car on the street? Still OK? It really isn't any different (if we assume that nobody is being forced).
Just as well they've never asked for your respect then, hey.
Quite right.
As for the idea of owning someone and being owned, as some have described their relationships, I personally find that repugnant.
Thing is, ownership of a person is not possible unless you are talking slavery, which we're not. We are talking about a deep rooted human desire to pair up. If someone with a more radical viewpoint claims that marriage is ownership then that's okay but they are wrong.
If they decide to wear matching cardigans and claim they own each other it is icky and factually wrong but repugnant?
Are you poly amorous?
Why would we cross out the 'for money bit' cougar? Surely that is the essence of prostitution.
Is it bad to think less of a man who pays for sex?
You pay fot sex as well, you just havn't figured it out yet.
What if these others are in their 50s or 60s? What if they aren't flush so go a bit low rent and recruit from their car on the street? Still OK?
Because as everyone knows, people never have sex after the age of 50. It aught to be illegal.
Hang on a minute. If we cross out the "for money" bit, then that describes every normal woman who's ever been sexually active.
Not every woman that has ever been sexually active has had sex with a stranger.
Why would we cross out the 'for money bit' cougar? Surely that is the essence of prostitution.
I was just making a point.
A woman has sex before she sleeps with you, that's ok.(*)
A woman has sex [i]for money[/i] before she sleeps with you, that's not ok.
So why is it money that's the hang-up and not the prior sex?
(* - in her life, not five minutes ago)
I do feel the need to possess my partner
Ewwwww. If my woman ran off with another man that would be her choice and Id respect it, instead of becoming bitter.
Its guys like you who choke women out, plastinate them and then hang them from their basement walls.
Monogamy with our current lifespans is such horseshit anyway.
Not every woman that has ever been sexually active has had sex with a stranger.
And not every woman who has had sex with a stranger is a prostitute.
Not every woman that has ever been sexually active has had sex with a stranger.
What if they shook hands first?
[i]Are you poly amorous?[/i]
phwaoor;
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Not every woman that has ever been sexually active has had sex with a stranger.
How many, statistically, have had sex on a first date I wonder?
How many have had sex at swingers' parties or in fetish clubs?
How many have used dating sites primarily to hook up?
How many have gone to pubs and clubs purely to get pissed and laid?
Is there some sort of minimum time frame to have had to pass before it's not repulsive to sleep with someone? Have we regressed 50 years to "a woman who has sex on the first date is a slut"? (But good on ya, Billy, you got some!)
Its guys like you who choke women out, plastinate them and then hang them from their basement walls.
😯
😆
I miss you too oldboy, but I always told you that when Vegas called, I'd answer.
Toodooloo, my sweet potato! It was a lot of fun.
Thank you for that unkind comment, Pimpchild. FYI she went back to her childhood sweetheart.
In my experience (working with teenage girls groomed into prostitution), the word slag/whore/slut is an intolerable insult used to describe the victim of unspeakable crimes. The word pimp, on the other hand, has very different connotations (pimp my ride etc.).
Anyone who fails to see the ingrained sexism in this is an idiot.
The act of prostitution is fine, it's the business which stinks.
To answer the OP's question, if the hypothetical fella likes her, go for it.
How much money cougar? Will she sleep with someone she is attracted to for less money? Will she do 'other' things for more money? Will she let a couple of blokes do it for a bit more money?
Now I know that any woman has the same choices wether money is involved or not. But as soon as it becomes a transaction then I am out and quite happily deem them damaged. You disagree obviously but that's the beauty of a forum
How many, statistically, have had sex on a first date I wonder?How many have had sex at swingers' parties or in fetish clubs?
How many have used dating sites primarily to hook up?
How many have gone to pubs and clubs purely to get pissed and laid?
Is there some sort of minimum time frame to have had to pass before it's not repulsive to sleep with someone? Have we regressed 50 years to "a woman who has sex on the first date is a slut"? (But good on ya, Billy, you got some!)
In your egarness to grab the moral high ground you have missed my point.
Enjoy the view
Any guesses on Sten's job?
Any guesses on Sten's job?
Speaker of the house?
A report in the British Medical Journal about client violence towards women in prostitution stated that of the 125 women in indoor prostitution contacted, 48% had experienced client violence. The types of violence experienced included: being slapped, punched, or kicked; robbery; attempted robbery; beaten; threatened with weapon; held against will; attempted rape; strangulation; kidnapped; attempted kidnap; forced to give client oral sex; vaginal rape and anal rape. [Church, S., Henderson, M., Barnard, M. and Hart, G. (2001). Violence by clients towards female prostitutes in different work settings: questionnaire survey. British Medical Journal, 322. 524-525.]
In all seriousness to the OP, could your friend cope with the risks that his new girlfriend undertook every day in her job?
In all seriousness to the OP, could your friend cope with the risks that his new girlfriend undertook every day in her job?
nope...she would have to stop doing it, and has agreed to do so..
The game in reality is a long way from the romantic (sorry!) notions that seem to accompany it. Pretty Woman is not a documentary.
No.
nope...she would have to stop doing it, and has agreed to do so..
What if there are relationship troubles? Would turfing her out automatically mean that she went back on the game or is she able to stop doing that sort of work and retain independence? If so why would she be doing that sort of work in the first place? Because she likes it? Alarm bells...
I did have a fling with a high class escort once. She was a dancer at the same well known school in London as my best friend. She got paid a fortune (Saudi clients) and worked not that much, was flown all over the world and didn't work from London at all, or for anyone. I lost touch but did hear that she gave it up shortly after graduating and set up a yoga centre somewhere warm on the proceeds.
(Some of)You lot do have a juvenile and might I add religious view on sex, claim to be atheists yet still refer to sex workers in biblical terms..
And yes if I liked her, I don't think I'd be happy to continue with a long term sexual relationship if she remained on the game, but it wouldn't stop me befriending her/him.
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Jamie is badly needed right now.
In your egarness to grab the moral high ground you have missed my point.
Enjoy the view
Evidently. Why don't you elaborate?
Indeed, instead of resorting to flaming or cheap point scoring, just try and make your point. If the other person has not understood, perhaps you did not explain it very well?
How much money cougar? Will she sleep with someone she is attracted to for less money? Will she do 'other' things for more money? Will she let a couple of blokes do it for a bit more money?
Assuming for the sake of argument that she's doing it out of choice, that's up to her, surely. I'm not going to be judging her lifestyle choices.
If she's being forced / coerced into it, ie she's the victim of a crime, then that's an entirely different thing. But so long as they're safe and they consent then I fail to see what two (or more) people choose to do with their bodies and their wallets is anyone else's concern.
(On a point of note, I've never visited a prostitute, known one, or known anyone who admits to doing so. I have no vested interest here other than challenging judgemental minds.)
How many, statistically, have had sex on a first date I wonder?
How many have had sex at swingers' parties or in fetish clubs?How many have used dating sites primarily to hook up?
How many have gone to pubs and clubs purely to get pissed and laid?
But all of these examples still assume the woman chooses a partner that she find sexually attractive - they want to get laid but they still go through a process of choosing who they wish to have sex with.
A prostitute has sex with anyone simply to get money.
To me they are utterly different scenarios.
Sure, but I think you're replying just to my post there rather than in the context of the discussion.
Again, victims aside, women have sex because they want to. Reasons might vary; they're in love, they're horny, they want money, a cavalcade of other reasons. Who are we to say which of those reasons are the ones we approve of?
A prostitute has sex with anyone simply to get money.
not true...as pointed out shes actually quite choosy about her clients....
I wouldn't date a working one, an ex perhaps. A pornstar, no way, nor ex porn star. Fame and notoriety will need a very hard skin to deal with the future fallout ie recognition when shopping together (although societies perceptions are changing rapidly with sex due to porn)
But on the other hand I wouldn't like to date a virgin again.
I'm sure there must be a 31.6 or 27.2 seatpost insertion joke in here somewhere?
Sure, but I think you're replying just to my post there rather than in the context of the discussion.
Probably - had a busy day and just come up for air for 5 minutes of distraction.
How many, statistically, have had sex on a first date I wonder?How many have had sex at swingers' parties or in fetish clubs?
How many have used dating sites primarily to hook up?
How many have gone to pubs and clubs purely to get pissed and laid?
I think we need a poll.
How many, statistically, have had sex on a first date I wonder? yes!
How many have had sex at swingers' parties or in fetish clubs? yes!
How many have used dating sites primarily to hook up? yes!
How many have gone to pubs and clubs purely to get pissed and laid? No!
I think we need to bring in an expert here.....
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How many have purely gone to get pissed and laid, and failed. Yes
Wow, 212 posts in 4 hours!
Clearly its not a post about the Green party or Skodas! I'll have to read through it......
Im sure rockape63 has done all of the above judging by the usual antics of his work colleagues :p
TPbiker so she is picky with clients, does that mean she enjoys having sex with the ones she chooses? Can't say I would particularly like my gf just picking guys to have sex with because she enjoys it.
Or is she picky because she can tolerate it with those guys?
I feel sorry for men/women who end up in prostitution, I bet none of them grow up thinking ' I want to be a prostitute when I'm older ' .
All the comments about STI's are so stupid. Your are just as likely to get an STI off anyone, not just a prostitute.
Thank you for that unkind comment, Pimpchild. FYI she went back to her childhood sweetheart.
Apologies oldboy for any offence caused. There was nothing there not meant in jest.
wow!
missed this one.
erm, there some 'interesting' POVs 😯
All the comments about STI's are so stupid. Your are just as likely to get an STI off anyone, not just a prostitute.
I dunno Id day the odds of someone who's slept with 15000 ppl having an sti are greater than someone barely into double figures.
I dunno Id day the odds of someone who's slept with 15000 ppl having an sti are greater than someone barely into double figures.
someone barely into double figures is going to have a very limited sexual skill base.
[i]someone barely into double figures is going to have a very limited sexual skill base.[/i]
hahaha 2 😐
I'm mostly just making it up as I go along
OK so she's choosy with her clients. Right.
She's a plain old nyphomaniac who was into free love and then started getting paid for it.
You do realise that once shes had a taste for sexual freedom it'll always be there.
Growing up I knew two. It was normal to them. Tom's will always sniff out her. They just 'know'.
The girls that come down here and work the Ghurkas for a weekend earn three grand, not sure I'd want to spend the weekend banging ghurkas but it's not a bad pay check for a weekends work.
The rate is more than sixty quid I should point out, this is the south east after all, everything appears to cost more, but it's still a shedload of Ghurkas...
someone barely into double figures is going to have a very limited sexual skill base.
Debatable. Depends how... progressive those partners were.
Limited partner girls aren't as good? Seriously like a 100,000miler repcar mileage doesn't equal realisation/natural talent or confidence.
If anything more partners = jaded and bitter
If anything more partners = jaded and bitter
i dont know i used to be a nerdy loser teenager, i was jaded and bitter then but not now.
Seriously like a 100,000miler repcar mileage doesn't equal realisation/natural talent or confidence
Its okay for you to be experienced though Hora?
What about women who date 1 man for 10 years. Surely theyve probably done more ****ing? Are they damaged goods as well?
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You were jaded and bitter because you wanted rid of your meat n two veg. Not cos you'd slept with many people though?
Sten1 no that's teenage angst. You seem to be prolific on this topic. Why? What's your gig
Tom you are going to explain what you mean, it reads like you've misread into something.
Can I just give a small round of applause to the most intelligent post on this thread on page one by Teasel, even if it contributed nothing to the argument whatsoever.
Page two, actually but still...
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You seem to be prolific on this topic. Why? What's your gig
i have a strong professional interest in it, well more a weekend warrior type interest but never the less, its a subject close to my heart.
Soon as i'd cleared it with the wife, i'd be on her 'like a tramp on a kipper'. 🙂
Back to the original question it would be a no for me. Not because of any moral outrage but because every working girl I've met during my work has been damaged in some way or other 🙁 At the very least the work has made them hard and cynical. Very often even the expensive girls have serious emotional problems that would make having a proper loving relationship very difficult.
There might be exceptions out there, but the myth of the happy go lucky free spirited girl making a couple of quid is just that, a myth.
Sten1 close to your heart, wallet and/or pleasure circuits?
There might be exceptions out there, but the myth of the happy go lucky free spirited girl making a couple of quid is just that, a myth.
100% correct... but no reason not to date a person, many many people have much bigger emotional issue and have never sold sex.
someone barely into double figures is going to have a very limited sexual skill base.
Ohh look what I missed whilst working 😯
In answer to the OP's Q, No, no fanx. Don;t care what she looked like nor how good in the sack she was or indeed wasn't.
Just knowing that a "potential" partner was on the Game, shagged what could be 1000's of blokes and earning from it would send shivers down my lilly livered moral backbone and with that I'd not entertain knowing that person, like at all. I'd just cut it right dead there and then, probably to her face too. Which when you read that makes me out to be a right inconsiderate tosser which isn't the case really.
I have known loose women and some proper slapper blokes too, and I steer clear once I get the gist of who they really are and what (lack of) morals they have. I just can't bare the thought of sleeping around, picking up women/men in clubs for one night stands.. ohhh no. Not for me that. Ewe, all that sloppy hundreds (never mind seconds)
*shivers and shudders
I'm a proper prude me. 😀
No, no I really am 😆
Anyways, carry on, what difference does my opinion make to your life ?
None.. exactly none.
😛
Jeez, guys and gals, the economic recovery is shaky as it is, the time spent on this thread this afternoon may have pushed us back into recession!
Never stir another mans porridge