[Closed] Would I lie to you?

Three facts, probably quite easy for regular readers:

1) I've flown a microlite.

2) I've jumped out an aeroplane.

3) I've piloted a helicopter.

4) I am James Bond 😃

Form an orderly Q.

5. Your sister is named Teresa
6. Your mum loves Easter

7) you're not as funny as Bob Mortimer

8. You have no authority here. No authority at all

7 8 9) your gags are getting more repetitive than mine.

C'mon guys, don't spoil it, I thought this might be a bit of fun. *pouts*

3

or 2

OK 1.

That's my final offer.

None of the above?

The helicopter one is the lie

I’d go with 3 as well, but Perchy made me laugh with his “no authority” response.

Microlite

Microlight

@thols2 is correct.

Would love to, but never done it. It's on my list. I have thrown myself out of perfectly good aircraft and I have indeed flown and landed a helicopter. They're curious beasts.

Over to you for the next set, hols.

I don’t think this thread went as planned......

... and now you've spoiled it by editing your post to be an exercise in pedantry. :-p Still, you were right, so off you go.

I don’t think this thread went as planned……

They rarely do.

Expected, however...

1. I didn't intend to actually play this game, I was just being pedantic because I'm bored.
2. I'm not completely sure how many bikes I own.
3. My music collection includes every Billy Joel single he ever released.

Must be 3, no one ever owns a complete collection

Must be 3, no one ever owns a complete collection

Yes. Also, a good chance to say how much I loathe Billy Joel.

Come on Somafunk…

Just noticed, sorry

1 : I have walked a pet hyena on a lead.
2 : I have had to escape from a machete wielding drug dealer by jumping out a window as a drug deal (only charas) went bad in anjuna, goa.
3 : I have bungee jumped from Victoria falls bridge

You can't really keep a hyena as a 'pet' so i'm going for that one.

You can’t really keep a hyena as a ‘pet’ so i’m going for that one.

Unless you're Pablo Escobar hiding out after faking your own death.

Yeah, that would still just be a captive hyena as opposed to a pet.
I am being petandic.

3.
The others are just a normal day in D&G, no?

2. only cos the others have gone so its all thats left, i actually think its true.

EDIT: not actually sure i want to win this anyway as i can only think of one true fact thats vaguely interesting about me....

3 because you’ve got the hump that lynx and puma have their own helicopters.

Matt wins 👏

I once ate six mars bars in half an hour

While working on a site i unearthed a bomb

I've won every game of trivial pursuit I've ever played

I won last time we played this game.
I lost last time we played this game.
I like this game.

If Matt won why is Jon posting his three things? Are Matt and Jon the same person?

No he's just being "that person"🙄

I have had to escape from a machete wielding drug dealer by jumping out a window as a drug deal (only charas) went bad in anjuna, goa

The problem with this game is I now want to know all about the above incident!

1: My name is John Caramel
2: My name is Barbara Lighthouse
3: My name is Steve Bytheway

I have had to escape from a machete wielding drug dealer by jumping out a window as a drug deal (only charas) went bad in anjuna, goa

I knew that one was true cos it's been mentioned before.

stcolin
Free Member
1: My name is John Caramel
2: My name is Barbara Lighthouse
3: My name is Steve Bytheway

No I, Ludicrous fans in then?

Was quite looking forwards to this game but, it has been spoilt by eejuts that can't resist jumping the gun.

What it needs is a moderator to clean up the crap posts and let the game flow 😉

Matt wins

I've puked on Cliff Richard.
I've beaten an Olympian at thier sport.
I've had a beer with BoJo.

I’m going for number 3 - I’ve had a beer with BoJo

@funkmasterp has it - I've only had a coffee with BoJo and his dad, and only because I had a coffee machine on our trade stand...

I used to be able to do thirty handstand press-ups

A friend and I twice narrowly avoided arrest for racing reclining armchairs down a street at 03:30 on the morning.

I’ve never ridden a proper road bike

Jesus, my life is devoid of anything interesting 😀

This being stw I'll go for no 3 🤔

@Dickboy has it.

MTB, BMX, Klunker and Gravel. Never a proper road bike though

Okay here goes:-

1. I have bungee jumped at Victoria falls.
2. John Fashanu broke my bicycle
3. My wife "caught my eye" when she was just 8yrs old 😲

Fash didn’t break your bike?

Yeah, that old BS about bungee jumping...

@Dickyboy: 1 is the lie

TomHoward has it, was years ago and I was on a tricycle not a bike & John buckled the wheel on it.

Bungee jumping at Vic falls was horrible, felt like my brain was going to pop, was violently sick and felt like I had a hangover all day ☹️

1. I've had a longer than was comfortable kiss with a rockstar.
2. I was going to be an extra in Hollyoaks, but was turned down at the last minute, as I 'Didn't have the look they needed'.
3. I went to school with a gold medal winning cyclist.

3, I remember you mentioning bout #1 a while ago

What it needs is a moderator to clean up the crap posts and let the game flow 😉

Sorry. )-:

3, I remember you mentioning bout #1 a while ago

+1, option 2 is far too creative to not be true.

OR IS IT?!

I have kissed this rockstar

(Forgot i’d mentioned it here tbh...)

I went to school with a few people that were in Hollyoaks as extras (and a future Doctor Who) but the one person I remember most for their apres school talents, (maybe I inspired them, who knows...) was this young lad:

Is that Ed Clancy?

It is.

Also, you've shown your hand before anyone guessed correctly. Which has bollocksed the system. Shall I do another Starter for 3?

EDIT apologies, Somafunk got it correct. Over to them then.

So no one has won.

No no, I'm mistaken, it's your turn.

Nobody guessed it, in 4 1/2 hours... I can go again if needs be?

Bobbins, I'm mistaken in being mistaken. In my defence, it's 1:30 in the morning.

Er, I dunno. Have another drop if you want?

I guessed 3 so I chose a “truth”, the lie is 2. And as tom “outed” himself with expose of “2” as a lie this round is now fubar

I see a flaw in this game as it only takes 3 posts to guess correctly as there is zero incentive to repeat the guess of previous posts, but I’m just sat here listening to music whilst browsing right wing American and qanon nut jobs on Twitter discuss how the democrats seeded the clouds over Texas to drop snow and altered the jet stream so a big freeze would occur, I really need a distraction from “fruitloop batshit mentalists”, go again tom.

Oh, you know, I'll just take it.

1) I've been asked if I'd like a Jelly Baby by the Fourth Doctor (Tom Baker).
2) I've been SPELLCASTING: D-I-S-M-I-S-S-ed by Knightmare's Treguard (Hugo Myatt).
3) I've been One Year Out on Radio 2's Popmaster (Ken Bruce).

I see a flaw in this game

The flaw is that I bollocksed up. Sorry.

And yeah, you're right, there's no reason to repeat guesses. If you've any suggestions as to how to improve it I'm all ears, I didn't put a vast amount of Game Design thought into this beyond it might be fun.

1. On the way to my wedding, we (me, best men, step dad and dad) had to interrupt a game of golf, as the pilot needed to use the fairway to land the helicopter we were in, as we were all too fat for it to land in the proper spot

2. Whilst working in a bar pre smoking ban, I refused service to Dave Courtney (author, actor and self proclaimed gangland enforcer) unless he put his cigarette out whilst stood at the bar. He did as he was told.

3. On a different occasion, working in the same bar, Timmy Mallet was doing a sort of stand-up/grown up wackaday show. He hit me so many times over the head with that damned hammer, I had to take the next day off.

That’s more like it, utterly improbable yet quite possible scenarios

Can’t be #1 as a helicopter pilot would be very unlikely to fly with an excessive load, and 4 + 1 in a small commercial hire helicopter?.

#3?, nope. Any self respecting barman would’ve ****ing lamped him at the first hit.

So I guess #2 is a lie

Ah, bugger, I've fragmented it again.

Can’t be #1 as a helicopter pilot would be very unlikely

So #1 is surely the lie for just that reason.

If I'm right, next batch is above. If I'm wrong, crack on.

I am totally sidetracked by the prospect of getting a helicopter to a wedding. If this is true and not total nobblers, is there a forum thread elsewhere that covers the tale of this? Were there no classic cars available?  Did the bride come in by microlight? I feel I might be missing some key information here. And that 3 is the lie. Timmy Mallet probably did the whacking while you were in airforce one or some such.

So I guess #2 is a lie

You guess wrong

So #1 is surely the lie

Afraid not.

And that 3 is the lie.

Bingo! Hannah wins.

(We were close to the weight limit, but the helicopter landing area was encircled by trees, meaning the pilot would have had to fly over, stop, then drop dead straight down. He didn’t really fancy that so, after looping round a couple of times, did a constant descent onto the golf course across the road. Hotel/golf club were furious, threatened to get the pilots license revoked etc, but you know what they say about good landings being the ones you walk away from... speaking of which, here’s a totally not staged photo of us doing just that.

https://flic.kr/p/2kDfz28

I still have so many questions about the wedding helicopter, but, whoop!

1) my parents used to make me feed my sweets to the dogs if I was naughty. They stopped practice this when the chocolate made the dogs sick.

2) I once briefly had a kitten but it went missing. My great aunt found it drowned in the water butt and pulled it out as I watched. I said ‘that didn’t last very long’.

3) childhood holidays were almost exclusively spent at various British nudist campsites and beaches. One time my Grandparents came so we went to Butlins instead.

Oh man, I clicked on this thinking it was a Charles & Eddie appreciation thread. I is disappoint...

That’s not the kinda game I play

@stwhannah - I’m going for 3

Funkmasterp is incorrect. I have seen things. Including up a Frenchman’s actual anus on one memorable but rare trip abroad.

Pray for Hannah 😕

I'm going with the dog toffee. So to speak.

3) childhood holidays were almost exclusively spent at various British nudist campsites and beaches. One time my Grandparents came so we went to Butlins instead.

Well, that sort of thing is generally frowned upon by the naturist community but I’d imagine it happens all the time at Butlins and they’d be pretty cool about it.

And it’s the kitten. Unless Hannah is an actual monster.

Lol perchy. Had to read that a couple of times before I snorted at that one.

@cougar has it. My parents did make me feed my sweets to the dogs, but this didn’t make the dogs sick, so they never stopped it as a punishment. But they did add in feeding them to the birds. One time they found me putting my sweets on the bird table without being told off - I’d opted for pre-emotive punishment.