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There are a few words and phrases that I feel do not belong in the MTB lexicon. The stuff that forums, marketing bullshitters and magazines like to perpetuate, but have really no place in our world.
What words piss you off so much that you wish you could laser them off MTB's tattooed skin?
[b]1)[/b] Justify, Justified, Justification: As if anything we do is justifiable, and who cares. Nobody needs an MTB of any type, it is all about want. I'm fine with want. Wasting your life trying to justify owning a middle of the road xc hardtail or a single speed ti fatbike, is as pointless as aruging with people on the internet.
[b]2)[/b] Overbiked: Meaningless drivel where people get caught up defining a niche, just so that anyone caught not riding their minimal travel bike off a cliff into a field of sharpened steel stakes, during an earthquake, whilst wearing only their mothers skimpy négligée for protection, must be overbiked.
Awesomnez
'Stoked' especially 'super stoked' just sounds, well.....false 😆
Oh yeah and the word ' enduro' where's that word all of a sudden come from!?
singlespeed
Steed
Huck.
Mountainbike.
When they were called klunkers it was about pulling bikes out of scrapyards and bouncing downhill for giggles. I love the fact that if your brakes weren't good enough you just fitted a Bigger Lever.
Rotors...... In the US brake discs are called rotors. In the UK they are called brake discs.
All the usual BS as someone mentioned above, stoked, pumped and doubly so if someone mentions "super stoked" or just super anything.
The word 'super', super this super that, its super annoying and adds nothing.
Pumped, sick, gnarly, rad, boost, roost, dude. Oh, and 650B.
Surely rotor refers to the round metal bit bolted to the hub and disk brake is the just a generalisation for the rotor and caliper.?
Yes the rotor (in MTB and US terms) is the metal bit that fits to the hub. But go into a motor bike or car garage, motor factors, main dealers and ask them to change your rotors. They won't know what you are on about.
Most of the MBUK terminology.
Oh, and using the word 'hoop' to describe a wheel rim.
"Edit" - No, the word is film, or even video if you must, but not "edit", you asshats!
"Colorway" - I [i][u]will[/u][/i] kill you.
"Pull the trigger" - Now, if you're actually shooting, then that's just fine, but if all you're doing is pressing the "add to basket" button on an online shopping site, I'm afraid to say that it's time for you to be dropped in to the pit of rotating knives.
I could go on, but I can feel my blood pressure rising already.
Full Gas.
That really gets on my tits.
Wasting your life trying to justify owning a middle of the road xc hardtail or a single speed ti fatbike, is as pointless as aruging with people on the internet.
No it isn't.
I get irrationally irritated by the use of 'quiver' and 'steed'.
CaptainFlashheart - Member
"Edit" - No, the word is film, or even video if you must, but not "edit", you asshats!"Colorway" - I will kill you.
"Pull the trigger" - Now, if you're actually shooting, then that's just fine, but if all you're doing is pressing the "add to basket" button on an online shopping site, I'm afraid to say that it's time for you to be dropped in to the pit of rotating knives.
I could go on, but I can feel my blood pressure rising already.
CFH this is so beautiful, I could weep.
"Fender" Its a bloody mudguard!
"Seat post." Seat pin if you please.
"Spinning" my mum does that with wool. In Britain we twiddle!
"non drive side" such cobblers. Left!!!
Sessioning
"run" as in "I run a 45mm stem on my enduro bike".
You run a sweepstake, a business, a pub, a lathe, possibly even a lawnmower. You [i]have[/i] a 45mm stem on your bike and you sound like a nugget using the word "run".
Oh and putting slippery black stanchions on a fork like just like marzocchi have been doing for 10 years is not made novel and groundbreaking by the use of "murdered out".
Oh and forks when you really mean just the one fork, (would you do the same talking about a garden or eating fork?) and consequently referring to the fork using the third person plural 'them' when you mean 'it'.
Haven't heard anyone say 'Schralp' for a while though, so could be worse.
Ghetto
That's pretty much it for me - the rest just sails over but that one somehow lowers my opinion of the poster.
I accept, even admire, a good bodge but a ghetto fix is a shit version of the same.
Flow.
And I'd also erase any person who drops litter on a trail, or anywhere in woodland. Litter on the trail really ruins my flow.
And I'd also erase any person who drops litter on a trail, or anywhere in woodland. Litter on the trail really ruins my flow.
Having pulled a bag of rubbish of Dumyat, including loads of energy gel wrappers today, I agree. Dirty people.
I propose that we make the concept of litter picking and litter pickers honorary words in our dictionary. Then we can erase those fingernail sniffers from MTB history.
Dialled!
Oh, I love most of these words, but then I'm justifiably over biked running super tough hoops on the totally dialled awesomez gnarpoon I pull from my quiver of steeds when I shred the switchbacks and flow thru the berms on my way to a super stoked gnarly sick ride.....
PeterPoddy - Member
gnarpoon
I'll give you my gnarpoon when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.
PP, u da man, man! Props, braw!
PP earlier today:
[img] 
[/img]
[i]Sessioning[/i]
Yep. 'sessioning' = 'Practice' FFS!
Dialled. Eff Off!
Ghetto. Don't even say it till you've been to India.
Stoked. Not unless you've got a coal fire or a coal fired...something.
Gnarly is almost ok but I prefer 'Nadgery', a motorcycle trials term probably invented by Martin Lampkin. Or Malcolm Rathmell.
Go for a pooh before a ride instead of buying x component. Some days I may be constipated but my new stem will [i]always[/i] be 13g lighter than the old rubbish one I had before 😉
In fact any of the guff that unless you have the skills of Steve peat, lung capacity of liam killeen and weigh the same as Kylie there is no justification (thank you toys) to buying nicer bikes/bits
+ most of the above.
Edit. Except sessioning bizarrely, I quite like it, yes I guess practising would do the job but sessioning just sounds more....right
And gnarpoon stays aswell.
Rig
"Spinning" my mum does that with wool. In Britain we twiddle!
You may twiddle but I can assure you that I do not!
What about "shredding"- do people still say that, or is it out of date?
~I had a hamster that shredded.
I quite like mihaly csikszentmihalyi's work on flow. Would be sad to see that one go.
Disk and not Disc
Enduro
All Mountain
Can we just get rid of everything and start again?
When I first started mountain biking 6 years ago, the first MTB magazine I looked at was MBUK, which was all stuff like "The MBUK Wreckin Crew, off shredding the gnarly trails and throwing sick tricks!"
Not really aimed at 39 year old women! I thought I'd taken up the wrong sport 😆
PP wins the thread 🙂
Ghetto. Don't even say it till you've been to [s]India[/s] 16th century Venice
Sessioning, allowed. Sectioning, verboten.
I'm going to India again next January but I'm struggling to find flights to 16th century Venice. 😉
"Retro"
'Swap out' - eh? You change it - wtf does swap out even mean?
"Trailhead"
You mean the start / car park / a point on a map / pre-arranged meeting place
And all those 3 letter acronyms that actually mean a load of nonsense generally found plastered all over bikes from the likes of Trek, Merida, Cube etc
And all those 3 letter acronyms
These are usually abbreviations like TLA.
SAD is an acronym.
TLA is an acronym
in klingon 😆
Pumped, sick, gnarly, rad, boost, roost, dude. Oh, [b]and 650B.[/b]
650B pre-dates mountain bikes by at least half a century. I had a bike I rode dirt trails on with 650B wheels fifty years ago, knobbly tyres, riser bars...
It's a common European wheel size, get used to it.
😛CountZero - Member
It's a [s]common[/s] dead European wheel size, [s]get used to it[/s] burn it with fire.
650B pre-dates mountain bikes by at least half a century
Bet you people were riding bicycles up mountains well before 650b was introduced. 😀
[b]Sandwich [/b]- These are usually abbreviations like TLA.
SAD is an acronym.
but
[b]Wiki [/b]- An acronym is an abbreviation formed from the initial components in a phrase or a word
and
[b]Dictionary.com[/b] -
1. a word formed from the initial letters or groups of letters of words in a set phrase or series of words and pronounced as a separate word, as Wac from Women's Army Corps, OPEC from Organization of Petroleum Exporting Countries, or loran from long-range navigation.
2. a set of initials representing a name, organization, or the like, with each letter pronounced separately; an initialism.
"Wheel size debate" 👿
'Progressivity'
I read it in either this or last months mbuk. Many kittens were harmed as a result.
Anyone who uses the term 'darkside' is a joyless turd
Anyone who [s]uses the term[/s] goes to the 'darkside' is a joyless turd
There, fixed it for ya 😉
"pinning it"
A review of a long sleeved top in MBR recently stated that it was "designed for enduro but perfect for trail riding". WTF! It's a top you moron.
Trails getting rowdy for Guy Kesteven and his MBUK chums would irritate me but I rarely look at MBUK or WhatMTB beyond a quick scan in Tescos.
Anyway, who's planning on making 2014 "your best riding year ever!" then?
😛edhornby - MemberAnyone who uses the term '[s]darkside[/s] bidon' is a [s]joyless turd[/s] pretentious knobster.
'Climbs like a mountain goat'.
Really really annoying.
Rolloverability
Not a word...
Any time a bike is referred to as a machine or a weapon, a tiny piece of me dies.
[u]EX[/u]presso
it's [u]ES[/u]presso you utter cretin.
I don't care if it's not MTB pacific, it really broils my pips.
"Body English." As in, weighting the bike this way or that as you ride along.
That makes me well up with Body Anglo-Saxon.
What about all these top European riders? Do they have Body German and Body French?
I love Gnarpoon though. Props to the sick duuuude who came up with that.
'Stoked' especially 'super stoked' just sounds, well.....false
sounds alright when someone who's just done a backflip or whatever it sounds relevant.
when it's uttered by a fat man in Epping forest cost he's ridden his bronson off a root - not so much.
gnarpoon sounds like lady-parts with teeth
Always surprising how many irrational haters are out there.
gnarpoon sounds like lady-parts with teeth
[img] 
[/img]
Any time a bike is referred to as a machine or a weapon, a tiny piece of me dies.
Hate to break it to you but a bicycle fits the definition of a machine. And, if you read the Daily Mail and/or associated newspapers, by simply rolling past a red light or onto a pavement, a deadly weapon.
Always surprising how many [s]irrational haters are out there[/s] people can't take a thread on the internet with a pinch of salt.
😉
The word "natural" when referred to as a (non-trailcentre) location.
For example:
"Tarquin do you fancy riding a bit of natural, old chap ?"
And also "small bump compliance"
The correct working man's translation, at least in Cumbrian would be:
"Fancy a rat aboot in the Lakes oor boy?"
and
"Them forks are spot on ower coddies"
segment
Swap out +1 - it's a dumb murcan thing that seems to have come over on Pinkbike and has gotten into everything. I'm sure I heard it on Radio 2 the other day.
50% of the rest are fine - really.
Any reference to a fork as a pair or set of forks (plural).
Any reference to a fork as a pair or set of forks (plural).
Do you feel the same about trousers and scissors?
Buttery smooth
Rip
Pin
Huck
I personally don't object to forks, but I do not think it is not quite the same as trousers and scissors..
A fork is a division/split. Each leg of the fork independantly does not define the fork, they have to be together. Whereas a trouser exists on its own, as does a scissor.. (I'm making this up, but it feels good)
I'm making this up
You are, but I'm glad it works for you 😉
- "[b]Gnar[/b]"
- Yes, "[b]running[/b]" (a stem) is just horrendous - compulsory extradition for that.
- "[b]finishing kit[/b]" (arghh!)
- "[b]Quinoa[/b]". (when pronounced: "Keeyyynwaaaahhhh") Are we playing Margo and Jerry? (ok, this one doesn't have THAT much to do with bikes, but still...)
- "[b]upgrade[/b]".
Last time I checked fork names were singular, eg. Pike, Boxxer, Float, Tower, etc. Not Pikes, Boxxers, Floats, Towers. Manufacturers don't refer to 'sets' or 'pairs'. But maybe they all have it wrong.