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At no point has the Op inferred he loves the woman. That she means so much to him that he is willing to attempt to spend the rest of his life with her, getting old, becoming one. The language used suggests they're just filling in time in the absence of a proper relationship.
Although, for anyone at uni, even mature students, relationships are a difficult issue as marriage and kids is "in the future".
Link to a song that says it all. Not safe for delicate peeps though!
Wayne County & The Electric Chairs
If you're havin' girl problems I feel bad for you son
I got 99 problems but .......
May sound a bit harsh but,
GET RID!!!
Its prob not going to be easy for you, but your'e only putting this off for another time in the future(it will crop up again).
By then you may well have had a couple kids with her, and **** there lives up too.
Sorry thats my 2 p worth (been there got that badge, never again)
Had a friend who was in a very similar situation to what you're describing. They ended up having two kids together and now she treats him like crap. She has no respect for him and he has no respect for himself.
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She sounds like a keeper.
What you want to do is;
1. Get her pregnant.
2. Get married.
3. After baby arrives, look after baby while she goes out.
4. Give her cash for the night out (she'll need plenty of money for Italian beer)
5. Welcome her home in the morning
6. Say hello to Italian man when you see him about (don't worry about the strange smirk)
You'll need plenty of pasta and various Dolmio sauces, that baby is probably going to like Italian food.
Fortunately, Italian men are not known for their womanising, so I don't think you have anything to worry about.
You may also want to think about changing the name of your home to 'Cuckold Towers'.
How I picture the other bloke.
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Find a woman you don't like and give her half a house.
Only half? Give me the name of your lawyer 🙁
It has been suggested that the best way to take revenge on a man who has shagged your woman is to let him keep her.
Get rid. ASAP. Life is too short.
OP her head has been turned and only a spade would turn it back again.
Girls aren't like guys (for the main) however if a girl is shown interest and makes the move she'll never be the faithful type ever again.
The 'wanting a baby thing' isn't and shouldn't be the reason why you thought she split from you originally now. Her head has been turned.
Leave, before one day, at the birth/hospital in the future you think to yourself your newborn baby has slight Mediterranean features fella.
Save your sanity. Walk away. I could see which way my ex was going (nurse) and boy did she turn into a right one after I'd walked.
This thread is unanimous in a way I've never seen another on here. If ever anyone takes the advice of the STW collective, I hope it is this time.
Good luck OP. If you need anything - email me (use a dummy email if you want). markhoracekuk at yahoo.com
[i]If you need anything[/i]
How about a million pounds and a fast car ?.
If you need anything - email me
I read this as hora's hit service
this has been interesting reading, over a cup of tea.
seriously fella, this is going to sound harsh and i'm not trying to p*ss you off, but............
grow a pair, get on your bike and get the hell out of there.
this girl has issues, maybe you both do, but being together and starting a family isn't the way to solve them.
-if you can't be arsed with confrontation, just go.
-if you fancy rumbling her, tell her you've read her phone, and know everything, then go.
don't let it fester, it will eat you up inside, and screw you up even more than she has.
leave her, go and enjoy your life, finish your course, and make something of yourself. then in 5 years time, you'll probably bump into her in the supermarket, she'll have 6 kids, all by different guys, and you'll thank god, you got out of there while you could.
remember that you are going to be working with a lot of women in uniforms, very hot. nurses are dirty, in a way you'd never think.
(this is only my opinion, and should be treated as such)
If you class her cuddling into his c*** ok,Then why not stay with her.
+1 for getting the hell out of there. It's not healthy, it will never be healthy and the big loser in all this is going to be you.
Run, don't look back.
Incidentally, reading the OP and looking at a calendar, if she hadn't miscarried I'd be seeking a DNA test.
Pretty much how I read the first post....
How clear are you in your mind? Doubts must be there, surely... 🙁
OP you need steeridge, grab hold of a big rudder and give it one hell'va tug in the opposite direction.
Where has the OP gone? all quiet ....
I think he's legging it in the opposite direction to her? (I hope so anyway).
thanks jackthedog. That is the 3rd best thing I've ever seen on the Internet.
She's either still seeing him or is keeping her options open. Either way she's shown she can't be trusted.
Time to remove her options and make the decision for her.
Sounds like the Italian is the one mainly initiating the flirting here. If she really had anything to hide, she would probably passcode her phone and not leave it lying around where it could be looked at (if you're genuinely playing around you don't take that risk, or you delete all messages from your bit on the side).
However, there's some reason there why she hasn't deleted his number and cut contact, or told him explicitly not to send her inappropriate texts.
My boyfriend had an ex who used to text him when she was drunk, and it was always flirty stuff and sent about 2am. One day I got fed up when his phone kept beeping at 2am and I picked it up and looked through it. His responses weren't flirty, but they weren't telling her to eff off either. I told him he needed to either tell her to stop drink-texting and texting inappropriate things or cut off contact. He didn't want the confrontation particularly, so that's why he'd just either ignored her or replied neutrally. But I felt quite strongly that he needed to make it explicit to her that he didn't want those texts, otherwise for me, that would have suggested he wanted to keep her around as a "possibility".
I think you need to have it out with her - 'fess up to looking, she won't be happy, but neither will you until it's sorted and you know where she is at. She needs to get rid of this guy or there's no future for your relationship - if she won't do it, you know where she's at.
If she really had anything to hide, she would probably passcode her phone and not leave it lying around where it could be looked at (if you're genuinely playing around you don't take that risk, or you delete all messages from your bit on the side
Or she was simply too dim to think about doing that or know how to.
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Not disagreeing with a lot of the sentiments expressed but flattery and immaturity are dangerous bedfellows. The don't start a family whatever you do is however the MOST important peice of advice here and to anyone in similar circs.
Gareth Bale