[Closed] Wife has said I might be allowed a shed in the garden

no cellar ??
poor,poor show

Wait for daylight, photos and plans

Moat or gtfo

The wife and I still haven't resolved the intended use for a planned large shed in an unused part of the garden. Naturally I assumed it would be my domain, possibly upon consideration of me waiving any say in the redecoration of the house. So I'd made advanced plans of a deluxe workshop and bike storage etc

I was sorely mistaken as apparently the wife believes it will be her yoga retreat 'sanctuary of tranquility' with extreme minimalism. Possibly a candle or Joss stick and yoga mat. And piped in zen music. This might rub up against my bike tool board and metalwork vice. And the opened bags of cement and wasp bombs. We ll have to see...

Please share your thoughts, experiences and successes

You're a grown adult and if you "might be allowed" to do something that you want to do then you're in an abusive relationship.

Unless your thread title was for comic effect (which could be likely given the rest of the OP) I'd recommend either building a shed or running away and shacking up with someone who isn't emotionally 14.

Apologies if I've misread your post and it's 'bloke speak' for respectfully taking a partner's opinion into account. But I do so tire of this "not allowed" bollocks, are you dating your mother? There's a fair gulf between "my girlfriend isn't too keen" and "my girlfriend won't let me."

Unless your thread title was for comic effect

Heaven forfend! And if not, I'm surprised no suggestions yet to build a patio first.

Wow, Cougar must be on a pudding holiday at the moment or something....

You’re a grown adult and if you “might be allowed” to do something that you want to do then you’re in an abusive relationship.

Whilst in some instances this may be true, i'd contend that, in general , it's not.

I'm a 48 year old , happily married father of three and among the many, many things that i'd like to do are:

Sack off my job and lie in bed all day and play video games.
Sell my children into modern slavery.
Bang the tits off as many hookers as I can manage.
Eat nothing but Haribo.

Thankfully, my wife is there as a sensible voice of reason in my life to firmly but gently say no to many of the wilder impulses that often flash across my brain.

There is nothing odder in the world than a 50-ish year old man who has no-one in his life to say "No" to him when the occasion requires it. That's a route to madness

if you “might be allowed” to do something that you want to do then you’re in an abusive relationship.

Just shows how (unnecessarily) attempting to judge someone from a few lines (or even a few words) of text in a forum post can lead you to a completely, well, silly viewpoint.
How about that there are 2 people living together in a house and one won’t do just anything they ****ing well like, without the other’s agreement. That would be my take on it (having actually met WCA).

I'm not sure whether to criticise Cougar or phone the domestic abuse hotline 🤔

I didn't see that coming.

What an interesting and timely thread!

Mrs Semtex and I have just had a conversation about this very topic just this weekend.

It's the phrase "might be allowed" that is making the hairs on the back of BOTH of our necks stand on end.

For us, those words strike a real chord and drum up images of the "Mrs Brown" school of motherhood. The "Interfering Mammy" who's nose is in everyone's business and has to have the last word on all household decisions. The world has to revolve around HER and all of HER wishes have to be respected otherwise those around her have to suffer the wrath of "her indoors" with a face like a busted sausage for weeks on end stamping her foot like a child because "NO-ONE LISTENS TO ME!"

Might be just an Irish thing, but there seems to be an increasing number of relationships that are based on this dynamic. (The wife being the gate-keeper and the husband being the ****less idiot whose stupid ideas have to be reigned in otherwise the world would stop spinning.)

I've seen two examples this weekend.

Firstly, my dad, who has pots of money to burn.... has worked hard all his life and now wants something for himself, is NOT ALLOWED to buy a motorhome.

and secondly, my brother was NOT ALLOWED to come out with me for a blast on the back of my motorbike.

Both of these decisions were made unilaterally by the respective women in their live WITHOUT any discussion. A simple sweep of the hand and a stern "YOU'RE NOT DOING THAT!" was all it took to keep the "little men" in their place.

My wife an I just dont get it. We are a partnership. We talk about decisions TOGETHER and formulate plans TOGETHER. It just seems odd not to take the other persons feelings into consideration.

If you flip this situation on its head..... how many women would feel comfortable with being told,

"You're NOT ALLOWED to buy that hand-bag or you're NOT ALLOWED to go out tonight or you're NOT ALLOWED to do DIY or your're NOT ALLOWED to order that particular food in a restaurant." etc etc etc.

I choose to spend my life with Mrs Semtex because she supports my dreams and aspirations. I do wonder why other people are together sometimes.

Anyway, good luck with the patio (sorry, shed build!) Stay safe.

I'm surprised your wife let you post that.

*post deleted by MrsMC*

Firstly, my dad, who has pots of money to burn…. has worked hard all his life and now wants something for himself, is NOT ALLOWED to buy a motorhome.

and secondly, my brother was NOT ALLOWED to come out with me for a blast on the back of my motorbike.

Or perhaps, both had discussions with their partners and agreed that both were silly requests, but to save face in front of other males, they simply chose to wrap it up as 'wife said no' rather than 'my wife actually had a valid argument as to why the suggestion was, frankly, a bit silly. I accept she made a good point and I am going to take her advice because I am a grown up person who is willing to listen to others' points of view'.

?

It sounds like a new video channel will be required...tree house, 2 storey shed, underground bunker...it'll be a great channel;)
OK so I think we already have a tree house in Scotland...you know near those wood piles! So yes OP go for it!

I choose to spend my life with Mrs Semtex because she supports my dreams and aspirations. I do wonder why other people are together sometimes.

I aspire to rebuilding a 1952 Vincent Black Lightning on the dining room table. I do not share this with my wife because I know this is a selfish thing to want even if I knew she would acquiesce.

I wouldn't buy a motor home if I my wife didn't share my desire to go on holiday in one because it would never get used.

I wouldn't go out on the back of a motorcycle because I know my wife would fret.

So, one person's 'support' is another's 'I won't ask because I know she wouldn't want me to do that' is another's 'I'm not allowed to do that'.

It's all the same thing - being in a relationship and adjusting your expectations to your partner's preferences (and them to yours).

Compromise, it's all about compromise and we all have (for want of a better phrase) red lines in relationships that we know we can't or shouldn't cross without risking a loss of trust.

TLDR; "I'm allowed" is usually just a way of saying 'my partner has no interest in this thing but has agreed to it because they know it will please me'.

Two storey shed round a tree sounds amazing. Look forward to the build pics.

One note of caution is that building a second storey may need planning if it is near a neighbour's fence. You could end up in an unwanted planning war over it. A friend had to block up a window on a kids tree house as it overlooked a neighbour's garden (if you ignored that they had a massive hedge blocking the view anyway). The rules are often daft but break them at your peril!

PS The way of keeping the inside dry enough to store stuff whilst letting the tree move, grow etc. sounds like a challenge.

PPS the local planning permission of the other resident(s) of your house (i.e. Mrs WCA and the rest) is definitely important here. Building a shed without prior domestic planning consultation would definitely be a huge issue so appreciate the need for being 'allowed' to do so.

Lol at the idea of WCA not being allowed - I'm fairly sure the real MrsWCA went under a patio long ago. haven't we all seen the "are you bored enough" stuff he comes up with? 🤣

He's like Colin Furze already, just on a smidge of Valium

Get on it WCA

Um, I know what I wrote some am surprised the way this has gone following Cougar post.

[i]She said she ‘might’ consider a shed there to store the BBQs and seat over winter.[/i]

We were discussing how to stop our BBQs rusting. MrsWCA was thinking about a cover for them and I suggested a shed in the corner of the garden. Nothing to do with permission or control, just a discussion. From memory what she said was more along the lines "That's a good idea, a new shed might be an option.

So now that's resolved, perhaps we can discuss sheds?

ScardyPants - [i]Lol at the idea of WCA not being allowed – I’m fairly sure the real MrsWCA went under a patio long ago.[/i]. She either smiles, shrugs or suggests otherwise when I share my ideas for a project.

Just for the record MrsWCA liked the 8 foot flapping albatross I made but suggested I hung it in the sports Centre as it was a little large for our garden. Ditto the larger elephants head but that now lives in the cabin as the granddaughter likes playing elephant owner and 'makes' us wear it while walking around the garden. The 5 foot pink sea horse and tree trunk carved dragon are both in the front garden and my daughter took the sheep flower planter for her garden. I think most of the other stuff I have made is kicking around the house and garden in various states or repair. The only firm NO I have had recently was for a 4th car but as there are only 2 of us and she doesn't drive it seemed churlish to insist - well until I find something I particularly want.

Not sure if it was a serious suggestion to have a tree growing through but as noted above, it will be a PITA to waterproof a roof on that basis. Various tree house websites do show how to do it but they mostly seem to fail over time.

I agree sealing around the tree is doomed to fail.

My plan is to have the tree grow through a separated area in the storage level so that the store room is fully sealed. Less worried about water in the seating / balcony / turret area.

Need to check heights and neighbours thoughts. It could be a single storey shed with a big storage area underneath if that helps with planning. The corner of the garden dips away so the top floor would be approximately level with ground level of the existing cabin. The existing cabin is against the neighbours fence and has a window over looking them but we fitted opaque film to that to cover privacy issues. The neighbours are normally pretty good and it is only overlooking a corner of the garden they don't really use either

Have a little browse here:

https://www.nelsontreehouse.com/blog/2019/4/15/our-final-season-of-treehouse-masters

There is nothing odder in the world than a 50-ish year old man who has no-one in his life to say “No” to him when the occasion requires it. That’s a route to madness

Harley Davidson exists for purely this reason.

Garden sheds, greenhouses and other buildings
Planning permission is not required provided that:
1. The shed / greenhouse / building is used for domestic purposes only.
2. The ground area covered by the shed/greenhouse/building and any other buildings within the boundary of the property, excluding the original house, is not more than half the total area of the property.
3. No part of the shed / greenhouse / building is in front of the principal or side elevation of the original house that faces onto a road.
4. The maximum height of the shed / greenhouse / building is 4 metres.
5. The maximum eaves height of the shed / greenhouse / building is 2.5 metres if it is within 2 metres of the property boundary.
6. No part of the shed / greenhouse / building is within 3.5 metres of the boundary with a road to the rear of the house.
7. If you live in a house within a World Heritage Site, area of outstanding natural beauty or National Park the maximum total area of ground covered by buildings, enclosures and pools situated more than 20 metres from any wall of the house does not exceed 10 square metres.
8. If you live in a house within a conservation area, World Heritage Site, area of outstanding natural beauty or National Park the shed / greenhouse / building is not situated between the principal or side elevation of the house and its boundary.
9. The building is not used for the keeping of pigeons.
Note: Measurements are always calculated using external measurements.
If you live in a house which is a listed building, it is likely that you will need Listed Building Consent for any building operations. If the development is within the curtilage of a listed building you may need to submit a planning application for the work unless listed building consent has already been granted. Your local planning office will be able to advise you.

Harley Davidson exists for purely this reason.

Exactly my point. See also: Model Railway enthusiasts and the sex offenders register.

A quick read of AJWs post and it looks like I am okay for planning.

This is the area I am thinking of using and all the trees you see are within our fences. The 1.5m is restrticted by the magnolia growing in the corner. This will obviously require some pruning.

This photo shows the amount of drop away there is. Even with minimal ground levelling a 2m high roof doesn't really show, especially with the hottub/sauna cabin there already.

My current thinking is a 1.5m deep shed with big sliding doors along the 4m length. I might clad it with thin insulation foam and carve false stone effect to make it look like a castle / grotto. The roof will be solid enough for two adults to stand on and covered with thick EDPM to keep the inside dry while allowing people to climb/sit on it if desired. A crenellated effect balustrade (if I go for the castle) with a small turret could then be placed on the roof for some visual humour.

Thank you @Cougar for calling out these BS gender tropes.

Will access to the upper level be via the steps up to the wobbly plastic slide and then over the red tightrope towards the dangerous looking red spike (as depicted above)? if so, it all seems very fitting 😉

Garden sheds, greenhouses and other buildings
Planning permission is not required provided that:
1. The shed / greenhouse / building is used for domestic purposes only.
2. The ground area covered by the shed/greenhouse/building and any other buildings within the boundary of the property, excluding the original house, is not more than half the total area of the property.
3. No part of the shed / greenhouse / building is in front of the principal or side elevation of the original house that faces onto a road.
4. The maximum height of the shed / greenhouse / building is 4 metres.
5. The maximum eaves height of the shed / greenhouse / building is 2.5 metres if it is within 2 metres of the property boundary.
6. No part of the shed / greenhouse / building is within 3.5 metres of the boundary with a road to the rear of the house.
7. If you live in a house within a World Heritage Site, area of outstanding natural beauty or National Park the maximum total area of ground covered by buildings, enclosures and pools situated more than 20 metres from any wall of the house does not exceed 10 square metres.
8. If you live in a house within a conservation area, World Heritage Site, area of outstanding natural beauty or National Park the shed / greenhouse / building is not situated between the principal or side elevation of the house and its boundary.
9. The building is not used for the keeping of pigeons.
Note: Measurements are always calculated using external measurements.
If you live in a house which is a listed building, it is likely that you will need Listed Building Consent for any building operations. If the development is within the curtilage of a listed building you may need to submit a planning application for the work unless listed building consent has already been granted. Your local planning office will be able to advise you.

Missed off number 10:
Your wife is not called Karen.

Initial design thoughts showing it with door shut or open - for the terminally stupid there will not be two shed built there.

There will be two doors opening at the front both sliding freely side to side. This will mean you mostly stand in front of the shed and put things into it rather than going into the shed and putting things on the walls either side of you. This is designed to store chairs, BBQs, Kids toys and fire pits. It is quite shallow at 1.5m so hopefully this will work and stuff won't get 'lost' at the back of the shed.

The structure will probably be sheets of marine ply with re-enforcing wood where required. It will sit off the ground slightly on a few brick/concrete pillars rather than a big slab. The balustrade will sit over the roof as a separate piece so can be taken down once the novelty wears off.

I am also working on a castle themed way of getting onto the roof and have my first scale model prepared.

Thoughts and advice welcome, especially if you have any ideas on how to make carved insulation foam weather proof.

I aspire to rebuilding a 1952 Vincent Black Lightning

Careful.

Next comes a fettish for red hair and black leather.

You'll die, she'll get the bike.

Next comes a fettish for red hair and black leather.

😁👍🏼

As it's castle then may I suggest spiral stairs although a drawbridge from the wall you picture the slide on would be equally fitting, although I don't know which end is best to fit the portcullis.

P.S. I think you have all planning consents sorted, local agreement and well within the legal neighbour issue. Builders merchant next stop?

Make sure the spiral staircase spirals the correct way to afford yourself a defensive advantage should your curtain wall be breached.

Drawbridge to the wall was my planned entry to the castle. Need to do a bit of design work.

Wife thinks it looks okay but I will wait until after I have fitted the glass balustrade to the main patio so I have some space in the garage.

I also need to built a fake vintage fuel pump next to the main garage door to hold the electric charger for the car.

All stuff that 'might' happen...

Read/watch all the info on this guys website. Probably overkill but it gives you a good idea of what may be involved.

https://www.alidymock.com/

We're moving house soon and I've got a bike store/home office/shed combo in the planning. Going to dig down a little bit and have an oak sleeper retaining wall around the perimeter of the 'shed' so I can get the ground floor level with the ground outside to maximise the internal ceiling height whilst still keeping the maximum height below 2.5m. Will be reinforcing the bike shed walls with something like this: http://securitylath.co.uk/

Need a slide off the roof.

Thankfully, my wife is there as a sensible voice of reason in my life to firmly but gently say no to many of the wilder impulses that often flash across my brain.

Thank you @Cougar for calling out these BS gender tropes.

I should clarify, I'm kinda twitchy about this as I've been on the receiving end of an abusive relationship. Domestic abuse is not exclusively men treating women badly.

I don't think that telling people (ie, random strangers rather than close friends who are privy to any nuance) that you have to ask permission to make basic decisions is particularly positive. If you're serious then that's deeply worrying, if it's a joke then is your other half happy with you portraying her in that light in public? At best it perpetuates an unpleasant stereotype.

Partners are supposed to enhance you life, not restrict it. It's common courtesy to include a partner in discussions of course, and I used to joke "I'll see if I'm allowed to play out" when arranging beers with mates. But that audience understood that I wasn't asking permission but rather saying "I'll run it past her and check that she doesn't have anything else already planned" and making a joke of it. A grown adult not allowed to do things by their partner is tragic; swap "wife" for "husband" in the subject title and see how well it scans then.

But as I say, it might be just me being overly sensitive due to past history. Sorry, as you were. I'll shut up and go back under my rock, I don't know anything about sheds.

A grown adult not allowed to do things by their partner is tragic

There are lots of things that it’s perfectly acceptable for a partner to prohibit a grown adult from doing.

Jacqueline from Accounts for example.

But she was using the photocopier and I asked if she wanted help reproducing...

Mrs_D & I briefly discussed the idea of a garden office, seeing as we’re both WFH for the foreseeable, she’s acquired ‘my’ office and I’m now working on the dining room table. With two cats for company.

Then we looked at the price... three grand for a shed?!?!?! And that’s at the cheap end!
When I built my 7x7 brauhaus it cost about £400 (ok, not insulated or electrified). Shame it’s full of s***

Thoughts and advice welcome

Get some-one with professional experience, and insurance to build it for you? Only semi-joking by the way, if the shonky results of your "are you bored enough" threads and your past history of being able to injury yourself really quite severely without actually getting to the point of permanent disability are anything to go by, you shouldn't "be allowed" near anything remotely like this.

You’re a grown adult and if you “might be allowed” to do something that you want to do then you’re in an abusive relationship.

I told my wife this, but found out that I'm not allowed to hold opinions.

[i]Get some-one with professional experience, and insurance to build it for you? Only semi-joking by the way, if the shonky results of your “are you bored enough” threads and your past history of being able to injury yourself really quite severely without actually getting to the point of permanent disability are anything to go by, you shouldn’t “be allowed” near anything remotely like this.[/i]

Pah, I direct you to todays thread of near death. Stress testing someing WCA built by dropping a 25 foot Oak branch onto it from a forty foot height.

https://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/testing-structural-integrity-of-a-shed/

Now please withdraw the word "Shonky"