[Closed] Why are there no Jedi's in Scotland?

We're all Sith up here

Maybe the Scots aren't so stupid or conversely they may take religion more seriously.

cause that's an english and welsh map?

Rubber_Buccaneer - Member
Maybe the Scots aren't so stupid or conversely they may take religion more seriously.

I would hazard a guess that there are serious discrepancies in both though claims! 😆

Because they're fictional - perhaps there should only be one - Ewan McGregor, but I think even he would blush at it.

Darth Maul was from Motherwell remember

Darth Maul was from Motherwell remember

Did she follow you out the disco?

Maybe the Scots aren't so stupid or conversely they may take religion more seriously.

You say that... But those 2,169 Cornish Jedis aren't messin' about

Don't know about Jedi,you will see more than a few Wookiee and Ewoks oot in Dundee any Friday night

...because, up here Yoda is the bloke who's married to yo' maw

I thought this would be a thread about skills instructors 🙂

No football team to support

Darth Maul was from Motherwell remember

Darth Maul would likely get his head kicked in at the Mega Bar in Motherwell.

If Star Wars had been set in the West of Scotland..... (an oldie but a goodie - this has been doing the rounds of t'Internet for some time..)

Chewbacca would look roughly the same except he'd only be about 5ft tall, from Blackhill, and called Shug. He'd have the same amount of body hair but would also have tattoos, would permanently smell of drink, and invariably sport a Rangers top.

Obi-Wan Kenobi would invariably be referred to as Chief or Big Yin by his cohorts. People trying to start a fight with him would address him as ****y-Nobby.

Darth Vader would be referred to as "Auld Helmet Heid" or in moments of stress "That Dome-Heided Basturd".

R2D2 would refuse to go out on the streets after 10pm because of the number of drunks who would try to stuff chip papers in his head casing or piss on him. He would also refuse to go near groups of wee boys at any time because of the high risk of being spray painted/dumped in front of a speeding train/set on fire.

Although proficient in over 3,500 languages C3P0 would still be unable to understand anything anyone from the East End of Glasgow said. He would regularly get beaten up for being a "greetin-faced poof fae Milngavie".

The Millennium Falcon would have static strips, tinted windscreens and extra-flared exhaust ports. It would have a Daily Record "I Love Scotland" sticker in the back window and a saltire bumper sticker.

Princess Leia would get captured by Darth Vader because it's hard to run very fast when you're wearing 5 inch heels and a tiny silver mini- skirt which keeps hiking up over your arse every two steps, and you've been a heavy smoker since you were six.

The best way to destroy the Death Star would not necessarily be a desperate all out attack. Two easy ways would be:-

(1) Alter its orbit so it passed through Bridgeton and tell the locals it was full of Catholics.
(2) Leave it unattended in Easterhouse.

Translated lines from the film:-
Han Solo:
"I've got a real bad feeling about this."
"Ah'm *in' ma sel' here boy."

"Bring 'em on! I prefer a straight fight to all this sneaking around."
"Come ahead then! Ah'll tak' on the fing lot o' ye! Ah've bin dyin' furra square go."

"There's no mystical energy field controls my destiny."
"The Force?!! D'youse think ah came doon wae the rain?"

"Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid."
"Nae messin aboot wae the god squad and auld rubbish, wee man. Get yersel' a decent shooter."

Darth Vader trying to shoot down Luke Skywalker:
"The Force is strong in this one."
"Stop shooglin' aboot, ya wee basturd!"

Princess Leia:
"You're a little short for a Storm-trooper aren't you?"
"Ah didnae think they took short-erses in the polis."

"This bucket of bolts is never going to get us past that blockade."
"Wuv goat NAE chance in this pile o' *e."

Luke to the Emperor:
"Your overconfidence is your weakness."
"Ye'r a cocky wee *e."

Obi Wan:
"I felt a great disturbance in the Force."
"F*** me! Whit wiz that?"

P-Jay - Member
Because they're fictional

You could say the same about any other religion...

😆

...because, up here Yoda is the bloke who's married to yo' maw

Very good. (-:

You could say the same about any other religion...

I think that was pretty much the point of claiming it on the census in the first place.

There was a rumour that if sufficient numbers claimed 'Jedi' as a religion it had to be officially recognised. Turned out that this wasn't the case, for reasons I forget.

Its a map of England and Wales

Good work perchy,good work.

There is a Jedi news? 😯

http://www.jedinews.co.uk/news/news.aspx?newsID=23665

Aye but are you a cattlic jedi or a prodestant jedi?

Aye but are you a cattlic jedi or a prodestant jedi?

You can tell by the colour of their lightsabers. Green or Blue.