[Closed] Which particular members of society would you like to see summararly executed?

executioners

5.....4.....3.....2......

as a rule I don't like other people much. Except the ones I've met, they're all ok.

anyone who asks this question.

The miserable old gits who run the service laundry in West Didsbury.

Well beaten with my proposed answer that it should be people who propose summary executions.

socialists. All of em.

Except Frank Field, he's alright.

😉

intolerant people

Anyone that's appeared in ok, chat, hello, and all that stuff. All celebrities. All worshippers of celebrities. The trafford centre.

With you on the pit bulls binners, same happened to my daughter when she was 3.

Well I don't agree with execution, so could the above have a jolly stern telling off please?

everyone involved in the making of the following ads:

Halifax radio show
Go compare
the screwfix ads on crappy freeview
compare the ****in meerkat.com
that new gillette one with the razor up on a ramp - idiots.

Those responsible for customer service (a ha ha ha) at Tiscali and BT.

I would behead the lot of them with a shovel.

Anyone involved in the "No win, no win fee" claims industry. I help run a family business which has been going for 30 years, which does an honest decent job in giving the holidaying public an affordable fun activity, we spend a lot of time and money making it as safe and enjoyable as possible, we make a living at it, but its not a fortune by any means. And these so called "claims experts" seem hell bent on bringing us to the point of jacking it all in and closing the business. I got randomly accosted in the street, in my home town by a street salesman asking me if I had anything I could remember that had happened to me recently that I fancied claiming for, he got it both barrels thats for sure 😀

The miserable old gits who run the service laundry in West Didsbury.

Solly? Light, you no like your clothes clean?

hughjengin what do you do?

Robert Mugabe.

A "3 strikes and your out" on people who can't use indicators on roundabouts. First offence, loss of licence for 10 years, second offence insertion of indicator permanently on to a body part somewhere, third offence summary execution.

Anyone who believes in god and rams it down other peoples throats should be sent to the gallows .Especially Members of Parliament.I can't vote for anyone who believes in an imaginary friend in the sky

+1 for the dog owners. I would control the breeding of all dogs when I came to power, say by about 90%. Also in my election manifesto: Abolish the monarchy and aristocracy; disestablish the church; make all faith schools become either private or drop their faith ............ I'd better stop there.
Do you think I'll get elected?

Sounds good you get my vote

hughjengin what do you do?

We manufacture small amusement park rides for children and adults. We still manufacture in the UK. with UK staff which is getting trickier year on year, but have a policy to keep it that way so we can keep a grip on our manufacturing and design standards, as we are highly regulated. But unfortunately that makes us easy targets for the bottom feeding claims brigade.

Shatner.

I have a claim active at the moment as I was hit off by a **** opening his van door.I have been off the bike for 4 weeks and lost work so hopefully I will win through my no win no fee solicitor .Then I can buy a new bike

Solly? Light, you no like your clothes clean?

No such prejudicial opportunities, I'm afraid. They're white Mancs with no f---in' manners of sense of f---in' humour. C--ts.

Slightly OT- I remember reading about the Chinese Laundrymen on the warships in the Falklands War. Talk about throwback to a different era!!

Cat owners - shove the cat sh1t dropped on my flower beds/drive/garden up their ****ing noses until it pushes their brains out through their ears, inconsiderate c*nts

Shatner.

I would agree based on his cover version of Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds alone.

Right - I shall call my party the CSP (Common sense party). Any suggestions for policies meeting the CSP ideals?

1. All politicians
2. Politician wannabes
3. Fanny Cradock

The obese, I know a lot of them are 'jolly' nice, but.......

anyone who takes politics seriously... and/or
everyone living north east of an imaginary rightangle created by drawing a line east from the most south easterly point in Devon... and another line north from the same point.

ciao

I was walking to the local shops on Sunday afternoon with my daughter, there was a few 'lads' who had clearly had a couple of carling round the back of the co-op. A young lass was walking toward the shops as well, when one of the 'lads' starts up with 'f@ck!n greats tts love show us ya..........' and a general assortment of inane sexist crap followed for the 2 mins it took her to climb the steps to the chippy. There were other kids around, but this doesn't seem to matter to them as they continued to mouth off violent, sexual abuse.

On Saturday I found out my friend had died from a brain haemorrage at the age of 39.

I'm not sure about execution, but I think kicking 7 bells out of oxygen wasters should be allowed.

Middle lane hoggers on the M4

Ed Balls.

white101, I was in Manchester Aquatic centres sauna suite a couple of months back and three female Uni students were also in there. two scallies were coming out with lewd remarks about them (sit on my face etc). I asked the girls if they minded and if I should have a word. All three were peeved but said thank you and it would probably cause some agro but they were glad that someone wanted to do something and this had helped them relax.

No one wonder that females feel intimidated into going that Sauna. Saunas are great but nice lasses make the heat that bit more bearable 😀

I have a claim active at the moment as I was hit off by a * opening his van door.I have been off the bike for 4 weeks and lost work so hopefully I will win through my no win no fee solicitor .Then I can buy a new bike

Then you have a genuine claim, and I have no issue or problem with that, it was clearly the other persons fault and not yours and its cost you time and money through no fault of your own and you should be fair and reasonably compensated for that. No question, I would expect the same if it was me.
When the claim starts getting padded out with Flashbacks, mental problems, insomnia, depression , trouble communicating and fear of being with other people and becoming introverted, thus leading to having to quit your job.
With requests to be compensated for all of these things then it starts to take the p !

Edric 64 - Member
Anyone who believes in god and rams it down other peoples throats should be sent to the gallows .Especially Members of Parliament.I can't vote for anyone who believes in an imaginary friend in the sky

Also +1 for Chavs and people with killer dogs.

Bureaucrats who make money saving decisions that lead to deaths when they know that is a likely outcome.

hora - Member
white101, I was in Manchester Aquatic centres sauna suite a couple of months back and three female Uni students were also in there. two scallies were coming out with lewd remarks about them (sit on my face etc). I asked the girls if they minded and if I should have a word. All three were peeved but said thank you and it would probably cause some agro but they were glad that someone wanted to do something and this had helped them relax.

No one wonder that females feel intimidated into going that Sauna. Saunas are great but nice lasses make the heat that bit more bearable

I hope you sh4gged them all.
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sorry, couldn't help it 😯

People who are intolerant of other races and cultures...and the Dutch!

Have we topped Piers Morgan yet?

Anyone who posts anything on the internet they wouldn't say in person to the the subject of their ire

mainly bike thieves
.
but also
everyone in prison who's guilty or fairly guilty 😮
skip lorry drivers
motorcycle couriers inc. takeaway deliverers
Piers Morgan, his family and friends, anyone within 100m of him and anyone with a name that sounds like Piers Morgan or admits to watching any TV programme with him in
anyone who looks a bit funny

all Audi drivers 🙂

i have pointed this out to several audi drivers hilldodger, including the director of the company i work for.

all convicted criminals

[i]all Audi drivers

i have pointed this out to several audi drivers
[/i]

😀

Hora. On general principle. Even though his dog is as gay as a row of chiffon tents

Off the top of my head, I am honestly unable to nominate anyone who deserves this treatment. Should I be worried?

fence sitters

Margret Thatcher.

Well

Michael Winner
All "light entertainers"
Hair metal bands and their fans
Anyone who dresses like Clarkson
People who wear jeans with dress shoes
helmet Nazis
Bigots
German car drivers and any Chelsea tractor drivers
Fixie riders
Moustache wearers

Anyone who dresses like Clarkson

Leave Bingo alone. Hes a mans dog in a gay icon-dogs body. He has issues because of this.

Football fans....oh and all cockneys!

Anyone who feels the need to tell me what car they drive without me asking them, and people who talk to their pets in a childlike manner.

Edit - Oh yeah, and people who think that novelty ties or socks are acceptable, and men with ear rings.

Cherie Blair.
A truly repulsive woman in every way.

bike thieves
politicians
celebrities
Fundamentalists

Animal research?

anyone asking for stupid inflated prices for their cycling tat on the classifieds... 🙂

The DG of the BBC

Architects determined that their ego-fuelled monstrosities should dominate the city skyline (I'm thinking Edinburgh mainly).

Oh I will agree with architects. You want to hear my latest run in with one ................................

*Wanders off droning*

Masonic cliquey ****y smug nobodies
You know who you are you cvnts!

so funny!
More seriously - folk who take money out the system for themselves while knowingly contributing little or nothing:

Benefit cheats
Tax evaders
Quite a few highly paid Contract Consultants in my business
Some investment bank executives
feel free to expand the list

Blimey , it's been a big week .And it's only tuesday , or something.
I live on a housing development up in the north . Manchester area . I wont name it . It has it's good bits , and its bad bits . Same as anywhere , i suppose .
All the really successful criminals live in Hale. It's not there .
Just last week , well , the weekend ,I had all my clothes stolen , well most of them . From the laundry up the road . I was a bit pissed off but there's no point shouting about it . It wasnt the chinky birds fault was it ? It turned out a fairly 'well heeled looking ferra ' had picked them up .
I said it must've been a mistake , but she didnt think so .
Anyway , like i said , it's a bit rough around here , but the people are just diamonds . Most of them ,anyway.
She's not really a chink . She's 'vieternamese '. Very good work ethic. Doesnt like the Amricans . Bombed her chippy . Honest .
She says " Bom -bing " .
I said , " It's a silent B "
She say , " Not in my bloody street . ! Everybody dead ! "
It's a true story .

The next day ,Kylie , the single mum from three doors down comes round . She's two kids from different fellas . Her first husband used to beat her , so she left him , and the new bloke works away a lot . Theyre saving for their own place .

so , she comes round with a big bin bag ,struggling a bit. She's mentioned my plight down at the single mum's refuge where she helps out ,and they've had a rummage and donated me some clothes .
I was touched , I can tell you . Not my usual look TBH . Trackies and stuff . I looked in the mirror , and I swear I looked like Vanilla I-C-E .

There's a few things in the bag that are a bit too wrong , though . You know ? We all have a limit . So , I pop em back in the bag , and as i'm nipping out anyway ( doctors orders ! ), i'll drop them round at Kylies for her to take back up the refuge .

Just as I step out onto the landing , Kylies coming out of her place . She's struggling with the pushchair in the door .Automatic door closer . fire regs .
It's time for Princess' walk , and she has to take Britney to the clinic . I 'd heard her bawling like a banshee in the night . Kylie looked absolutely knackered . What with John away , it can't be easy . She always has a smile though . Lovely girl .Someones daughter .
Anyway ,
I give her the bag , and that , and explain about the ' surplus clothes' ( i told her they were a bit too small just in case she thought i was a tosser, I was actually very grateful ), and just then realise I can do her a good turn back . Dib dib .
"I'll take princess for a walk so you dont have to mess about down the clinic ".
Princess is a lovely dog . A bit scary looking . One of them terrier types . A ' staffie ' , Kylie says . I dont know about dogs , but bloody hell can she pull .
I'm a bit out of breath as we get down onto the street . She's fairly dragged me down 4 flights of stairs . i hope she's got this much energy going back up ! ha !
I'm supposed to be taking it easy . I went to see the doctor . I've been a bit stressed out lately. It's little things that get you . Only last week i was in the work's van and nearly knocked a bloke off his bike . It was my fault i guess . I didnt indicate. No harm done in the end , but you shouldve heard the language on him . No wonder Clarkson doesnt like them .He is so funny . Did you know he's 6'6". How big's that in metres . Thiiiiiiiis biiiiiiig .

So , anyway , he phoned the yard.

The boss , Mr Chinaski ,said I should have a "bit of a break" . Sounds like the heave -ho to me in any language .
So , i'm chilling out .

In my Henleys project tracksuit and a pair of fake Sergio Tacchini bottoms .

At least my shoes are mine .Princess / cerberus is dragging me up the road when she suddenly comes to a stop . I 'm wrapped around a lampost with the dog and with my free-ish hand i'm trying to get out my nicotine replacement stick thing . Bloody rubbish .

sorry , but there you go .

Princess has seen a little kid in a Tansad and is pulling for a sniff , just when the phone rings . Of all the times !!

It's Mr Chinaski.
He wants to know If i'm feeling any better , he was a little worried , i'm a valuable member of the team , and would I be feeling up to turning in tomorrow , and that I sounded a bit 'nasal '?
whew ! what a relief .

I was smiling most outwardly as I said I was A- Ok , but i think the dad with the pram was a bit peeved off .
He didnt half pull the kid away, and gave me a proper nasty look , i can tell you . Most people round here know Princess . She's a proper softie , but like i said , looks a bit mean . She'd lick you to death that one .
There wasnt a lot I could do .
Princess is dragging me off to the park , I've got Henry , sorry MR Chinaski on the phone and a 4" long white plastic tube up my right nostril .
I should read the instructions .

So we get to the park . I'm wondering just what exactly the ' Henley project ' is . Are they trying to see just how many people they can con into buying their overpriced , underdesigned , far estern sweatshop clothing?
Mind you , if you get last season from TK maxx , it's not so bad ,when I realise.....

Princess will definitely want a number 2 .

I've none of them woopsie bags .

There's one of them doggy do bins , though . Over by the swings . they sometimes have a few stuck in the top . The council put em in . Good job it's not the 70s . They'd be full of evo-stick in faster than you can say " doG save the queen " . Ha .
Well , you know what's coming next . Princess squats down ,flarts , and squits all over the place.
Bag or no , you cant do owt with that .
And just then , who turns up . ? Tansad dad .
I am so utterly mortified at this juncture . It is now my turn to drag Princess .
Well , It's not the dogs fault .

There's a phone number on the bin for the council . I give them a ring ,and explain my predicament , and a lovely lady says it's no problem she'll send round the extermination squad ASAP .
She's joking !
They have a special team that deal with all the , er , crap jobs , so to speak .

So , we get to the flats . Princess is knackered and theres no way she'll walk up the stairs . Ace . The lifts out ( again ) and I end up carrying the bitch up the stairs .
kylie's on the landing with a brew , laughing her head off , and I swear the dog was laughing too ! I swore .
She'd seen me walking across the precinct and has made me a drink too , a nice cup of herbal tea . A right modern new-age infusion ,' Clarity ' or Harmonise ' or something .
I'll have a cup of 'Perspective ' . No sugar .
It turns out Britney just has the colic, poor thing , and John's coming home at the weekend , which is only , like , I dunno , a few days off , or something , and Mrs Chang has just phoned , that blokes been back in it was all a mistake .
Probably didnt fit him ,more like.

Laughed our heads off in the end , and even Princess caused a ruckus .

But it might have been at that fella downstairs playing the Wu-Tang dead loud . I think he takes drugs .

So , It was just like that .
Ok gotta go . There's someone at the door .
Is that a burning torch .... ?

+100 for muddyfox courier... It's some of the intolerant numpties on here that wants putting in the stocks for the day.. sillybillies.

nice use of chinaski... bukowski?

Bravo Muddy Fox. Bravo

Too much time on your hands...

MF Courier; Are you Irvine Welsh in disguise? Good though.

Reminded of this by the BT bill thread - the people who invented "plans" for phones, mobiles, internet access etc. I need to change my ISP - no, I don't want your light user plan or your TV inclusive plan any more than I want your fish plan or your free text plan on my mobile - I JUST WANT TO BE ABLE TO USE THE INTERNET - how hard is that!!!

Sorry.

Masonic cliquey ****y smug nobodies

"waves"

Yea , I'd just read 'Ham on Rye ' again .
They all just kinda pop in .

Too much time on my hands . er , yea .

I
am
so
tired
right
now.

It was bloody gone bloody midnight . I am not ever ever drinking coffee again .
Until earlier today.

And so it goes........

The Opra Singer who should Go **** Off, not go compare...

Castration with a blunt rusty spoon....

heheh,. I was thinking Bukowski too 🙂

good effort muddy.

Definitely do not get me started on BT .

MF: good
hope you write for a living, you're wasted if not