Where are you from ...
 

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Where are you from , no really from

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The woman was dressed in such a way that one might assume she was inviting questions about her heritage.

What what what ?


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:37 pm
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The funniest bit of an otherwise sad story is the ‘life time of service’ angle a lot of people seem to be taking.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:37 pm
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franksinatra - that was petronella wyatt acting as an apologist.
Yes that one; johnson's former mistress - one of them - who had an abortion and miscarriage with him and then talked about it when he didn't leave his wife, as he had promised to do.
It gives an insight into how that group/'social class' think about people of colour.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:40 pm
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 IHN
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Yes that one; johnson’s former mistress – one of them – who had an abortion and miscarriage with him and then talked about it when he didn’t leave his wife, as he had promised to do.
It gives an insight into how that group/’social class’ think about people of colour.

I don't wish to derail this thread, but it really doesn't. It might give an insight into how she views marital fidelity, but nothing else.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:42 pm
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What if some one has an unusual name and you ask where it comes from?

I do and I have been. I’m half-German, which tends to illicit responses about WW2 and football.

But I’m not a person of colour so I don’t visibly stand out from the crowd. The crap that people who do visibly belong to minority groups have to put up with depresses me massively though.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:43 pm
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This reminds me actually, I was once at a BBQ where one of the families there was hosting a Japanese student for a bit who was studying English. She was there too, she was nice, but her English wasn’t that great so conversations were a bit tricky and had to be simplified to a certain extent

At one point one of the other guests said to her something along the lines of “can you tell if someone is Korean or Chinese…” and then mid-sentence realising that she was effectively saying “…because you all look the same to me“. Watching her trying to dig her way out of that in such a way that the Japanese girl could understand, but that would not be hugely offensive, was both awful, and hilarious.

That reminds me of my female University Japanese friend from Yokohama who once said to my friend from London that she wanted to go to the "bug**r" bar instead of Burger bar. My friend tried very hard to keep a straight face, while I thought it was just another pronunciation. London friend then explained to me and we had a good laugh. Later that day we actually explained the meaning to her and she was slightly embarrassed. LOL!


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:45 pm
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Reading the original quote, i was going to say that it is clear Prince phil rubbed off on her. But i guess that is inappropriate


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:45 pm
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Posted : 01/12/2022 1:46 pm
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What if some one has an unusual name and you ask where it comes from?

I get this quite often. My stock reply is "my dad."

Of course it isn’t, but any intentions beyond interstest will be likely become clear very quickly.

Of course. In and of itself, "where are you from" is a reasonable question.

Go to anywhere non-touristy in the US and open your mouth, it'll be the first thing they ask. And they really, genuinely are interested and want to know exactly where you're from despite often having a grasp of UK geography which lends itself to questions like "whereabouts in England is Scotland?" It's harmless and quite sweet really (though it took me ages to find a satisfactory answer for them).

However, a persistent cross-examination including phrases like "your people" with a triumphant 'got there in the end!' is not taking an interest, it's Othering. You're not like us, are you, not really, you're just pretending. Why don't you piss off back where you came from.

I think this is a case of looking for racism where racism doesn’t exist.

I'm unsurprised.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:48 pm
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The woman was dressed in such a way that one might assume she was inviting questions about her heritage.

???????


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:51 pm
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I do get asked where I am from - because my name and accent does not match being scottish born and bred.  I don't take offense but depending on the circumstances I do sometimes answer in such a way as to disconcert the person asking.  Answering "Edinburgh" and refusing to elaborate and you can see folk groping for a non offensive follow up question.  I do tend to elaborate after a few moments awkward silence tho.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 1:59 pm
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The woman was dressed in such a way that one might assume she was inviting questions about her heritage.

I think (hope) that was meant to be a sarcastic joke satirising the standard victim blaming responses from the establishment, perhaps a little too dry to be picked up on.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 2:01 pm
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[url= https://i.ibb.co/m40jWc4/Image-1.jp g" target="_blank">https://i.ibb.co/m40jWc4/Image-1.jp g"/> [/img][/url]

https://youtube.com/shorts/8St7AI37F7Q?feature=share


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 2:08 pm
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That cartoon actually puts the lunacy of the question into perfect clarity doesn't it?👍


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 2:18 pm
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I think (hope) that was meant to be a sarcastic joke satirising the standard victim blaming responses from the establishment, perhaps a little too dry to be picked up on.

Nope


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 2:19 pm
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I will regularly ask people where their accent is from, irrespective of whether it is a foreign or UK accent, I find people are very relaxed about having an interest shown towards them and happy to talk about where they spent their childhoods.

Often they will ask me to guess and a couple of weeks ago a lady on a bike ride was well impressed that I correctly guessed Guyana. She only had a very slight accent but as it was clearly Carribbean and she was of Indian heritage Guyana wasn't difficult to guess.

In the course of getting to know someone through work etc I will sometimes ask them if they were born in the UK, I have no inhibition about that as along with 40% of Londoners I wasn't born in the UK myself. I will occasionally ask someone if their parents were born in the UK depending on the conversation and whether it is discussing culture etc.

I certainly don't treat the subject of heritage, ethnicity, etc, as taboo subjects, but do so in the context of genuine interest in a person. Lady Hussey's relentless interrogation of a complete stranger was bang out of order. If it was as alleged then it was clearly totally hostile. The fact that Ngozi Fulani was invited in the first place and Hussey was in effect sacked actually reflects quite well on the royal family/Camilla imo.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 2:29 pm
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I will regularly ask people where their accent is from, irrespective of whether it is a foreign or UK accent

What do you make of Ngozi Fulani's accent? Would you bother to ask her where it was from? I doubt it, and if you did you'd stop inquiring at this point, I'm sure...

Me: I am born here and am British.
SH: No, but where do you really come from, where do your people come from?


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 2:49 pm
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I’m unsurprised.

I'm not surprised that you're unsurprised.

Interesting though that Lady Susan Hussey's father in law was colonial administrator in East and West Africa, .As educator and who has written several books on his experiences there.

So from that we can expect family photos and interest in family history of that country.

wouldn't you think 😕


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 3:18 pm
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Maybe all this gets us a step closer to knowing who it was who was concerned about the colour of Harry and Megan's baby...?


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 3:27 pm
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My sympathy has mellowed somewhat now the lady in question is claiming she was abused because the foolish old dear touched her hair without her permission. Surprising choice of words coming from someone who runs a charity helping domestic abuse victims.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 4:30 pm
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I find the whole area of racism a bit of a minefield really, to the point of avoiding asking questions out of a genuine interest, for fear of causing offence.

I grew up in the Yorkshire Dales in the 60s and 70s when casual conversational racism was commonplace and school friends with slightly darker than usual complexions were given racially offensive nicknames and non of us had ever seen or met a person of non british heritage. As I grew up I found it easy to leave those ways behind having realised how abhorent racism is and having met people from other cultures.

Having met with and worked with/for quite a few of the 'Landed Gentry' types I can well believe that no offence was meant by the conversation which was most likely born out of a cack handed effort to make small talk and possibly a genuine interest because of familly backgrund coupled with an immense lack of awareness born out of living the lives they do. Oooh, a bit of class stereotyping prejudice there, and here's some more. Despite being 'well spoken' a hell of a lot of them are piss poor communicators and thick as mince but not actually unpleasant people.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 4:31 pm
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My sympathy has mellowed somewhat now the lady in question is claiming she was abused because the foolish old dear touched her hair without her permission.

that is assault in UK law


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 4:34 pm
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My sympathy has mellowed somewhat now the lady in question is claiming she was abused because the foolish old dear touched her hair without her permission. Surprising choice of words coming from someone who runs a charity helping domestic abuse victims.

On the contrary. I'd say she'd be perfectly qualified to comment on issues involving respecting personal boundaries


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 4:35 pm
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What do you make of Ngozi Fulani’s accent?

How do you pronounce her name anyway?

Erm-gozi? N-gozi? Ng-gozi?

My Zulu friend is Ndlovu pronounce as Ng-lovu.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 4:36 pm
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My sympathy has mellowed somewhat now the lady in question is claiming she was abused because the foolish old dear touched her hair without her permission.

I actually can't make up my mind whether pushing her hair to one side to read her name isn't the most offensive aspect of the whole unfortunate interaction.

I wouldn't call it assault but I would call it extraordinarily rude and insulting. How dare she touch a grown adult woman without permission as if she is a child?


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 4:44 pm
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stuhawk
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My sympathy has mellowed somewhat now the lady in question is claiming she was abused because the foolish old dear touched her hair without her permission.

In fairness I've heard that its a bit of a common issue that black people have had over the years, people touching their hair as it's "different". The Color Purple alludes to this in the "punch scene".

Now, in this instance, it was to read the name badge apparently but I can see why it could cause an issue for various reasons in this context and others.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 4:44 pm
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My sympathy has mellowed somewhat now the lady in question is claiming she was abused because the foolish old dear touched her hair without her permission.

That's actually something that people of African descent seemingly (only because I have no first hand experience) have to put up with a lot. Like, folk touching their hair to see what it feels like, uninvited. So I could understand someone feeling violated after the umpteenth ignorant twunt has a feel of their dreadlocks, afro or whatever style they may have. I have no idea why anyone would think it's okay to invade someone's personal space in that way but clearly people do.

@tjagain

What what what ?

<sorry>

</not_sorry>

(I actually agree with you)


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:01 pm
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Ernie - its would be considered assault in UK law.  Assault is actually a very low bar as it were


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:07 pm
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I’ve been thinking about this this morning, as I initially thought the same. But I’ve realised that if I met someone white at a do, I wouldn’t give their ‘roots’ any thought at all (unless, to be fair, I heard them speak with a particular accent or they were wearing a beret, a stripey top and a string if onions around their neck or something). I’ve realised that the reason I might be, what I initially thought innocently, interested in someone non-white’s ‘roots’ is because of just that, they’re not white. I’ve therefore based at least part of my interest and, in some way, opinion, of them on the colour of their skin. And that, I think, is unconscious racism. I think.

Well, you say you'd be interested in a white person's origins if you heard an unusual accent or something. Isn't that the same as seeing a black/brown/purple person? One of their physical features shows, very obviously, that they are not originally from here.
I don't think it's racism to see that, or be curious, just to discriminate because of it.

I often hear people speaking a language or with an accent I don't recognise or something and am curious where they're from, simply because I have a strong interest in different cultures and so on. Never ask though, because apparently it's racist.
Yes I get it's a sensitive issue and there are real problems, it's a difficult issue and a fine line sometimes but there's no point pretending everyone's the same.
Even in this case, the lady (not Lady) in question is making a point of her culture: "Sistah Space"

I'm white British but "different" cos of what I wear, do not mind at all people asking questions out of genuine interest.

a beret, a stripey top and a string if onions around their neck

Racist! 😉


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:10 pm
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ossify

I’m white British but “different” cos of what I wear, do not mind at all people asking questions out of genuine interest.

That situation is very different from the topic of this thread if you reflect upon it a little though.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:16 pm
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and she got a medal...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Royal_Household_Long_and_Faithful_Service_Medal

medal


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:17 pm
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wanted to go to the “bug**r” bar instead of Burger bar.

My son's first language for a while was German. His first first language so to speak.

Anyway the Frankonian word for digger is Bagger, which is pronounced Bugger.

Whenever we were out and about in the early years he'd get excited about seeing big duggers and tractors ( as any small boy would) and would shout any time he saw one. Much to the consternation of other people on the train/ bus/school trip

Happy days


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:36 pm
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Ernie – its would be considered assault in UK law. Assault is actually a very low bar as it were

Yeah I understand that but I wouldn't call it assault myself**, just extraordinarily rude and unacceptable. Possibly even ruder and even less acceptable than asking someone where they come from.

This was from the former Queen's bedchamber-whatever lady, you would expect a reasonable level of etiquette and politeness FFS. I bet she didn't touch Mrs Windsor's hair without permission.

**I am not the law.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:49 pm
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And there was me getting you confused with Judge Dredd 🙂


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:53 pm
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I lie about my origins because I was born in Dewsbury.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 5:54 pm
 IHN
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Isn’t that the same as seeing a black/brown/purple person? One of their physical features shows, very obviously, that they are not originally from here.

No, it's not. The lady in question is, originally, from Hackney. Assuming that she's 'not originally from here' because of the colour of her skin is, I'm afraid, racist.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 6:47 pm
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Asked a related question of a colleague today over lunch, after she'd said something about going to visit family in Eritrea. Long answer/conversation involving north London, Ethiopia and Eritrea (language, religions, script, cycling culture, director of WHO, war her accountant father fought in for six years), and the fact that as her passport is Swedish despite being brought up here from the age of five, she's applying to stay and has done the citizenship test.

I didn't get asked the question back. I mean, I might have had an equally interesting if shorter answer. Leeds. Leeds is pretty interesting, right?

(Obv sensitive territory best avoided by unpleasant racists -are there pleasant ones?-, but many people like to talk about their backgrounds, and it would be a shame to be frightened of asking about this stuff, if not as an opening gambit. Though actually I will ask "what's brought you here" of someone with an obviously distant accent. I mean why not? Makes for a more interesting Uber ride for all concerned.)


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 7:09 pm
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There’s a big difference between asking “where are you from?” once and repeating the same question and disregarding the given answers more than nine times in a row. That’s hideous.

I’m sure that it’s a coincidence that the same aide has been the source of many disparaging comments about a mixed-race member of the Royal family too.

When I first read the conversation, a couple of days or so ago, it was a real, virtual facepalm moment; virtual in that I wear reading glasses, and then I was wondering if this wasn’t the same person making the unpleasant comments about a Royal’s child. Those Royals involved have been consistently trolled over this issue, in particular by that odious piece of human garbage Piers Morgan, but this conversation shows that this sort of overt racism is something that needs to be addressed and those responsible forced to confront what they’re saying.

Many folk think my name is French.  Its actually Cornish

Well, there is the Breton connection between the two.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 7:30 pm
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The sheer entitlement that is demonstrated by reaching out and moving her hair, uninvited, is breathtaking. But, then again, maybe it isn't - and that is even more concerning.

EDIT: And imagine the repercussions if Ms Fulani had reached out and touched Hussey's hair, uninvited. Her feet wouldn't have touched the ground on the way to the exit and her ejection would have been excused as a 'gross breach of protocol' or something similar.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 7:39 pm
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Asked a related question of a colleague today over lunch, after she’d said something about going to visit family in Eritrea. Long answer/conversation involving north London, Ethiopia and Eritrea (language, religions, script, cycling culture, director of WHO, war her accountant father fought in for six years), and the fact that as her passport is Swedish despite being brought up here from the age of five, she’s applying to stay and has done the citizenship test.

Subtly* different though, you established they had an interesting story and asked a follow up question(s). Whereas this line of questioning was clearly going nowhere except an 'ahh haa, you don't belong here do you'.

*as subtle as a half brick through a window

I’m not surprised that you’re unsurprised.

Interesting though that Lady Susan Hussey’s father in law was colonial administrator in East and West Africa, .As educator and who has written several books on his experiences there.

So from that we can expect family photos and interest in family history of that country.

wouldn’t you think 😕

Africa isn't a country. Tunis to Cape Town is about the same distance (and far more countries in the way) than Vancouver to Lima.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 7:48 pm
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Lots of differing views on the hair touching, the vast amount I agree with. An invasion of personal space, rude, humiliating and just plain wrong on many levels, yes, yes, yes. A form of physical abuse, in this context not for me but the laws the law and I’m no legal mastermind. We all have different scales of unacceptable behaviour. Would be a boring world if we all thought the same.
Threads like this are great for seeing different views and opposing opinions on potentially challenging subjects. Keep the chats going good people.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 7:52 pm
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Always impressive that people who have had the benefit of a top drawer education can't inquire about a person's heritage in a more articulate and sensitive way.

Can't polish a turd I guess.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 7:58 pm
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Is anybody actually surprised by this? It’s completely wrong but utterly unsurprising unfortunately. Old privileged lady is racist shocker!


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:10 pm
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I get "where you from, no really from" asked pretty regularly and I'm a white British person living in Britain, just a different bit to where I was born and lived for the first 20 years of my life.

I don't get offended by it 🤷‍♂️


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:18 pm
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^^ I'm guessing they mean what region in the country or which town?

It's just not the same situation.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:24 pm
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freeagent
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Maybe all this gets us a step closer to knowing who it was who was concerned about the colour of Harry and Megan’s baby…?

Aye, there's definitely only one racist in the royal household and she is definitely a complete anomaly and definitely not at all representative of the culture and values of the institution so it must have been her 😉


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:31 pm
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I lie about my origins because I was born in Dewsbury.

"Dews Don't Count"?


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:32 pm
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I get “where you from, no really from” asked pretty regularly and I’m a white British person living in Britain, just a different bit to where I was born and lived for the first 20 years of my life.

I don’t get offended by it 🤷‍♂️

Possibly because

I’m a white British person living in Britain,


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:33 pm
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It is a different country, but still part of the UK.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:41 pm
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I get “where you from, no really from” asked pretty regularly and I’m a white British person living in Britain, just a different bit to where I was born and lived for the first 20 years of my life.

I don’t get offended by it 🤷‍♂️

So why don't you tell them the first time they ask?

Ngozi Fulani didn't apparently have a problem doing so when the bedchamber lady asked her.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:44 pm
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I think our pasts are a major part of who we are and not being allowed to be asked about them seems a bit sad to me.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:45 pm
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no one is saying that at all.  The point is when the answer was Hackney to the second time of asking then any further probing is not acceptable


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:48 pm
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Threads like this are great for seeing different views and opposing opinions on potentially challenging subjects. Keep the chats going good people.

Thought this many times about threads on here. I too not seen the transcript before. Disappointing that someone in such a position and privileged background would be so crass.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:48 pm
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didnthurt
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I think our pasts are a major part of who we are and not being allowed to be asked about them seems a bit sad to me.

I actually totally agree, it's an important part of all of us but none of us should be asked to justify the answer, repeatedly.

The charity boss has said she is proud of her African heritage but she is obviously British and told the Lady so. The Lady concerned simply didn't want to hear that part I suppose.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:51 pm
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I think our pasts are a major part of who we are and not being allowed to be asked about them seems a bit sad to me.

You do realise that Ngozi Fulani's past doesn't extend to before she was born don't you?


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 8:54 pm
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Perhaps I should carry my DNA results around with me.  Bore the pants off them.  Like most Brits ( anglo saxon 🙂 ) my recent DNA markers shows my ancestors were mainly danes, germans and french.  Long ago markers are shared with the Sami people.  clearly a true brit!


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 9:04 pm
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Why doesn't it? I have ancestry from England, Ireland and Scotland as does a lot of British people. My surname also has historical meaning.

It's all good.

But that transcript is pretty damning of someone pushing to get the answer that she had already made her mind up on.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 9:07 pm
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I like being a mongrel Brit, it's what makes me truly British. Same for the English language, more words borrowed from other languages the merrier.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 9:09 pm
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But that transcript is pretty damning

Well that's the whole point isn't it? It was a hostile interrogation based on a person's appearance.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 9:13 pm
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Disappointing that someone in such a position and privileged background would be so crass.

That's WHY she was so crass.
Cloistered, comfortable upbringing, unable to understand what a life outside absolute privilege looks like.

If you ever watch any of those sort of "rich kids go skint" or "CEO on the shop floor" type programmes, anything that puts a rich , privileged type into a "common" environment, they don't have a clue. They don't even know such a world exists, they are unable to comprehend a world where people don't have staff or any money worries whatsoever.

A lot of MPs are also like that - the abhorrent JRM springs to mind as a good example. It comes as a genuine surprise to these people that the average person on the street can't just reposition their shares, liquidate a few assets, ask Nanny to sort the kids out or rearrange that week's Fortnums delivery...


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 9:54 pm
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I have a non-English name. I hated being singled out as a child (it wasn’t cool living in RAF territory as a German and bullying was rife) and those questions always used to completely do my head in.

Although I have chilled out (now schoolyard violence is less of an issue) sometimes I don’t want to explain my entire ancestry to strangers. So if I answer Bradford - where I was born - to the ‘where are you from’ question I expect that to be respected. Anyone following up from there can, frankly, do one.

I sometimes wonder whether the structure of English society is based on trying to other people by any means and as much as possible.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:05 pm
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didnthurt
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I think our pasts are a major part of who we are and not being allowed to be asked about them seems a bit sad to me.

You're totally missing the point. This isn't about "asking about your past", this is about not accepting the answer when a black person says they're british.

You can ask about someone's family background, etc- but you've got to use a little tact and read the room a bit. But that's absolutely not what was happening here, she wasn't taking an innocent interest in a person's family history and just wording it badly. Don't let anyone pretend otherwise when they do this.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:05 pm
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It never generally occurs to me to enquire about anyone’s country of origin, unless they have an unusual accent, and that includes regional accents, but unless there’s an opportunity during a conversation to bring the subject up, I don’t think it’s really a cool thing to do.

I work with quite a few people who are clearly of Central European origin, mostly Polish, but I think we’ve had some Romanian workers as well. They’re often chatting away to each other and I’m often curious about whereabouts their home country is, but I can’t bring myself to ask, it just doesn’t seem polite somehow.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:08 pm
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This was interesting timing, as yesterday I was working on developing a hospital simulation exercise with an Australian Indigenous person. When our new intake of registrars arrive (from various parts of the world) in the new year one of the things we do is train them in "the way we do things here." A really good way of developing rapport with an Indigenous patient is to ask them "What is your country?" It's considered polite because it means much more than "Where were you born" and is more a question about kin and ancestry on both sides of the family and shows that you see them as an individual. The answer is rarely straightforward.

Personally, i'm fascinated by people's heritage, but to immediately ask questions based on appearance without additional context is exasperatingly lazy and arrogant.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:13 pm
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My Polish colleague quite likes talking about his country of birth and culture . He did say that being asked "how he was" by people he didn't know very well was considered rude in Poland. And apparently us Brits do this quite flippantly according to him.

Śmigus-Dyngus anyone?

https://culture.pl/en/article/smigus-dyngus-polands-national-water-fight-day

As for kids, they will find the smallest difference in other kids in order to bully them if they feel like it. Vicious buggers... Most of them thankfully do seem to grow out of it though.

But as I've already said, the transcript is pretty damning of someone trying to get the answer that they already have made their mind up on. Which is obviously not really on.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:24 pm
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I’m often curious about whereabouts their home country is, but I can’t bring myself to ask, it just doesn’t seem polite somehow.

How terribly British!

It's the first thing I would ask! I find people's backgrounds fascinating. Especially if I can learn more about the politics and current affairs of their country. Plus other culture aspects such food, religion, etc.

It all makes a tedious manual job more interesting and one of the many advantages of a multicultural society. I don't recall anyone ever appearing uncomfortable being asked about their culture, far from it.

Obviously I don't use Gestapo style interrogation like bedchamber Hussey.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:24 pm
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“where you from, no really from”

I believe the actual answer is , A pond of chemical sludge, somewhere in the great rift valley.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:30 pm
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“how he was” by people he didn’t know very well was considered rude in Poland. And apparently us Brits do this quite flippantly according to him.

When i first moved to Oz i noticed people don't answer the question. I think in Britain there's a "How are you?" "I'm fine*, how are you?" interaction. Here it's often "How are you?" "How are you?" where neither party answers... i find that weird.

*regardless of how you actually are as it would be rude to be honest of course.


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 10:49 pm
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Though actually I will ask “what’s brought you here” of someone with an obviously distant accent. I mean why not? Makes for a more interesting Uber ride for all concerned.)

Watch out the way you phrase the question as it may be interpreted as they got here illegally.

Like my colleague who kept questioning me about my being here. Passive so and so. Even when I told him plainly I am legally entitled to compete with him to get his job. He kept asking why I should be here. Then I just said something he didn't like to hear that I am a legal economy migrant and I can do a better job than him. I am here to get "rich"! He got annoyed but stopped dead when I told him my father probably protected his ancestral interests. Then I asked him why his ancestors come to this country to seek shelter and protection? Why didn't they fight like my simpleton father? (when Australian F1-11 landed in Borneo en route to OZ, only my father was allowed to check the plane because of his background)


 
Posted : 01/12/2022 11:08 pm
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You’re totally missing the point. This isn’t about “asking about your past”, this is about not accepting the answer when a black person says they’re british.

100% this.

It's easy just to see a slightly foolish/naive old-dear, who asked what she thought was a relatively straightforward question, and responded poorly when challenged on it by somebody a great deal less foolish and naive than her - and somebody not willing to just let it slide (and nor should she).

But reading Lady Hussey's CV I'm afraid that she personifies what's wrong with the institution of the monarchy/royal family/upper class in the UK, and it's hard to muster any sympathy when her lived-experience is juxtaposed with most peoples - oh and her daughter has now just married a Baron, and become a chambermaid (or whatever) to Camilla. I'm generally pretty ambivalent to the royal family, but this kind of thing has me eyeing my guillotine


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 12:38 am
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Well that’s the whole point isn’t it? It was a hostile interrogation based on a person’s appearance.

You seem very clued up on what constitutes racism Ernie, so maybe you can help define this question.

If a woman's refuge that was dedicated only to white women, would that be considered racist ?.


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 1:40 am
 lamp
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It was a complete set up.....the woman was wearing traditional African dress and seemingly was packing a device to record the conversation....An absolute non story. She was looking for an opportunity for some publicity.


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 8:31 am
 MSP
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mefty has already tried the "she was dressed provocatively therefore she was asking for it" line of trolling, maybe you could come up with something original?


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 8:36 am
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They’re often chatting away to each other and I’m often curious about whereabouts their home country is, but I can’t bring myself to ask, it just doesn’t seem polite somehow.

That's a shame.
I used to work with a fair few Polish and Romanian guys.
None of them were offended when I asked where they were from and had some really interesting chats with a few of the Polish guys about what life was like when it was a communist country.
Some were to young to remember so were interested on my take on it as I'd been there before it changed.

Got really friendly with a Romanian lad that was from the mountains and had a real love of the outdoors and used to love talking about the time he got to spend going back there.
Some of the photos he showed me looked like it'd be an brilliant place to ride.


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 9:21 am
 IHN
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It was a complete set up…..the woman was wearing traditional African dress and seemingly was packing a device to record the conversation….An absolute non story. She was looking for an opportunity for some publicity.

I can't believe I'm getting sucked into this, but...

Firstly, the lady in question is to the left of Queenie C in this picture, with her hand on another person's shoulder. She looks to be wearing a brown top. I'm not sure that classed as 'traditional African dress"

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-63822940

Secondly, from where have you deduced that she "seemingly was packing a device to record the conversation"?

Back under the bridge for you, sunshine.


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 9:24 am
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tjagain

that is assault in UK law

So do you not need an element of violence to commit assault then?


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 9:53 am
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Secondly, from where have you deduced that she “seemingly was packing a device to record the conversation”?

Apparently, Farage on GB News last night.


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 9:59 am
 Pyro
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I get asked where I'm from occasionally, if people can't figure my accent out. Telling them I'm half Cumbrian, half Geordie, and I've lived in Leeds for 20 years doesn't really clarify anything...


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 10:09 am
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So do you not need an element of violence to commit assault then?

nope

either a fear that violence may be done ie if someone is shouting at you they are going to kill you - thats assault without any touching.  Or touching without consent - thats assault.

Most people confuse assault with assault occasioning actual bodily harm


 
Posted : 02/12/2022 10:12 am
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