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I know a lot of cars have them, but that thing that pops up on the dash when the car decides its time for you to change gear, drives me nuts. If I changed every time it told me to I'd never ever make it up a hill because it tells me to stick it in fifth at about 45mph. What happened to the good old days when people actually knew when it would be a good time to change gear?
I think change lights were a bit of a swindle for emissions regs a few years ago.
The turbo. Its been dead since March. Car SORN.
With an engine that has 110,000 miles on it the accelerator pedal seems quite pointless on any uphill
As for the most pointless thing in my car...
My car has a "Sports Screen" if you press the right button it will display boost pressure, Power output, Oil Temp, Water Temp and, most hilariously of all... a G Meter.
Like you might get in something like a Nissan GTR.

It's not only a bit pointless in a Diesel Skoda, it's especially pointless as there isn't a logging feature, so if you decide you want to see what sort of G you can pull in a corner, you need to be watching it when you do so.
Me
DRLs that only work on front lights, not the rear, pointless and unsafe.
I've got some out of date alcohol testing kits for my last trip to France in 2019.
The speedometer.*
.
*making progress since 1977.
I had the upshift display coded out a few years ago, it still shows it on the LCD display (old style green backlight) but the bright light that accompanied it no longer lights up. So much better!
The most pointless thing I have now is the 'Speed Limiter' feature. You set it to a speed and instead of stopping you accelerating at that speed it lets you get 5mph over then makes a beep every 5 seconds until you drop back below the set speed. Tried to stick to it on the car's first trip to the Alps but after 5 minutes I gave up and switched it off.
Cornering lights !! Yes I know they light up the apex on a corner but **** me really !!!!!!
the stop/start function in my Tiguan, annoyed the hell out me so coded it out
My car has a “Sports Screen” if you press the right button it will display boost pressure, Power output,
Similar thing in my BM. Apparently teenagers and caravan owners like it.
The wifi it’s about 5mb per second.
DRLs that only work on front lights, not the rear, pointless and unsafe.
if i'm driving backwards towards an obsticle, there's lights on the rear of my car that light up..
The most pointless thing I have now is the ‘Speed Limiter’ feature. You set it to a speed and instead of stopping you accelerating at that speed it lets you get 5mph over then makes a beep every 5 seconds until you drop back below the set speed. Tried to stick to it on the car’s first trip to the Alps but after 5 minutes I gave up and switched it off.
this normally happens if you floor it (at some point on the pedal there might be a clicker, maybe not) you're able to bypass the limit (but it may beep), if you drive gently it will hold you back (which is a sensible adjustment)
What happened to the good old days when people actually knew when it would be a good time to change gear?
given the number of people on here ignoring change gear lights, thus producing more emissions, it seems likely those days didn't exist. fwiw I had a 1982 volvo with the same thing (based on, I think, a vacuum sensor)
if i’m driving backwards towards an obsticle, there’s lights on the rear of my car that light up..
What about the folks behind you in the dark when you have no lights on? At this time of year I see folk every day who clearly think their lights are on, as their dash is lit up.
If you only need lights for reversing, what's the point in rear lights at all?
What about the folks behind you in the dark when you have no lights on? At this time of year I see folk every day who clearly think their lights are on, as their dash is lit up.
If you only need lights for reversing, what’s the point in rear lights at all?
i put my lights on in the dark. drls are for daylight, hense the name.
People using cars badly has happened for a long time. As things become automated (like automatic lights), people doing that will become less of an issue. DRLs reduce accidents by ~6%, even if the only benefit was my insurance going down by 6% (lets ignore the lives saved), that's a good thing.
the stop/start function in my Tiguan, annoyed the hell out me so coded it out
I assume you’ve notified the DVLA so that the correct emissions category is applied to your car? People who disable start/stop are the car equivalent of Brexit voters “taking back control”.
European roadmap and electronic French toll tag!
My van has a rear view mirror but the tailgate is all metal, no glass.
Eco mode. It makes it drive like I've filled it with water not petrol.
As things become automated (like automatic lights), people doing that will become less of an issue
Cool, so we're about where Sweden was in the seventies, magic, go us.
Seeing as I've drove way less than 2000 miles this year I imagine my disabling of start/stop means the grand sum of ****-all when it comes to emissions, I see the point of it in a built up area or town/city but where I live in galloway its pointless.
The air freshener that's been in there for at least 9 months. It's now a piece of dry board on a string.
Me
the nut that holds the steering wheel 🙂
I had a merc GLE on hire last week. Don’t know where to start with pointlessness really. I liked the bit where you adjust the mirrors so they suit your driving position .... and when you select reverse it helpfully, automatically adjusts so that they’re useless.
the name of the song you’re listen to on a heads up display was obviously mission critical though
My car has a little puck attached to the scuttle that ‘enhances’ the engine sound, VW call it a soundaktor . It is supposed to make it sound ‘sporty’ because the exhaust note is a bit quiet. Hateful thing, luckily it can be turned down.
Literally just discovered today that when Previous Owner In Britain fitted the cheap and rubbish rear parking sensors, the rear crash bar got in the way so he just removed it... So the sensors get double pointless points from me, because they're bad at being reversing sensors and they've also made the car much less durable in a crash.
It also has one of those japanese pop-up parking poles from Previous Owner In Japan, which is totally totally pointless but I still love it.
Worst thing I've added is a plushie nitrous bottle.
My van has a rear view mirror but the tailgate is all metal, no glass.
a friend had mark 1 panda.
the dead basic model had no lid on the glovebox. Going up through the options you’d get a glovebox door and the top spec the glovebox had a lock on it. Hers was one above the base model. No door on the glovebox, but it had hinges.
Things I have never used;
Dual zone climate
Front fog lights
Trip counter
Buttons to turn off ESP and other crash avoiding features
Things I thought were pointless but are in fact amazing;
Self opening/closing hatch - this is in fact the greatest invention ever
What about the folks behind you in the dark when you have no lights on?
Just like all lights.
The wiring on my camper has had many many (poor) versions.
There is a very heavy duty switch screwed onto the dash that disappears into the loom somehow. Cannot fathom its purpose (definitely not OEM) and does nothing. I've spent a lot of time investigating that
CD player. Even more pointless than the USB slot which is purely for MP3 files and won't charge a phone.
Indicator stalk...
Self opening/closing hatch – this is in fact the greatest invention ever
I had a Passat that apparently did that. Spent weeks impotently waggling my foot under the bumper thinking "maybe this time the stupid thing will actually open" before discovering one day that this feature was, in fact, optional.
Our motorhome has an aftermarket button on the dash with an led above it that sometimes flashes red, sometimes green. I’ve no idea what it’s for and pressing it when stationary doesn’t seem to do anything. I’m too scared to press it when we are moving...
My clutch. It's lubricated with oil so one must plan ahead.
On the Seat, the arm rest which blocks the handbrake.
The Volvo it would be the AGM battery and extra faffage of the start-stop system that I suspect costs as much environmentally to construct and maintain as it saves in mpg.
a friend had mark 1 panda.
the dead basic model had no lid on the glovebox. Going up through the options you’d get a glovebox door and the top spec the glovebox had a lock on it. Hers was one above the base model. No door on the glovebox, but it had hinges.
I think you'll find the mk 1 didn't have a glove box at all. It had a pole all the way across with what can best be described as a hammock that ran the full width of the car. Fantastic setup you could get loads of stuff in.
Fantastic car in general actually nothing pointless at all just the basics who needs synchromesh on third when you can push your car back up the hill on your own to have another go at a jump start.
my BM
Indicators wholly superfluous
Flappy paddles if I’d wanted to change gear I’d have bought a manual.
Sunglasses case under the rear view mirror - too small for midget glasses
In my old 95 Aero, 'night mode' that turns off illumination and function for everything except the Speedo.
Everyone seems to think it's brilliant, because of the Saab cult, and it's different. It is, yes, but it's also pointless. It really is.
On my toy car, the 'beeeep' buzzer when you get near the Rev limiter to warn you, supposedly installed because the engine is so smooth people were forgetting to change gear. Can't hear it over the sound of the engine though.
In my new to me V70, strangely nothing. It's a genuine marvel to me.
And yes, turning off stop/start is daft. There will be way more occasions where is beneficial than you realise. Every little helps. And don't give me that 'extra wear and tear' nonsense. I know a fair few people who work in powertrain dev and the MTBF of the individual components is huuuge.
It also has one of those japanese pop-up parking poles from Previous Owner In Japan, which is totally totally pointless but I still love it.
Amazing! They're not pointless at all! Scraaaaaape! 😀
When I got mine from the importer I opened the door and a lady shouted at me angrily in japanese from behind the dash.
Something to do with the turbo timer (also file under useless) but still can't fathom what.
Flappy paddles if I’d wanted to change gear I’d have bought a manual.
This in my Passat. Used them twice for "fun" when I bought the car, but when the car does it for you, there is no point in them at all. And the "gear" stick can be pushed to the left into manual mode. What a bloody stupid idea, especially if, like me, you've knocked it into manual without realising it.
Yup. With you on the manual change for auto. I totally want to drive in a sporty manner in my vast diesel Volvo estate.
I’ve got some out of date alcohol testing kits for my last trip to France in 2019
Snap! 🙂
The very back seat armrest in my old touran one side had a pointless little lidded cubby proper tiny... So pointless the other side didn't get one.
Head-Up Display, it just seems a bit gimmicky to me. I still automatically look at the speedo.
Condoms
MX5 mk3. Oil pressure guage. It isn't, the signal driving it comes from the CPU and is basically set to mimic what an oil pressure guage would read if it had one, i.e. the tacho with a quarter second delay. Aftermarket items are available for those who like to make progress.
The handbrake on my Mazda 3. Not pointless as such but its so far over from where it should be if there is a passenger in the car I cannot help but stroke their leg when using it!
MX5 mk3. Oil pressure guage
A lot of 90s Mazdas had one like that, as well as a temp gauge that had three positions: cold, somewhere between a bit warm and not quite on fire, and on fire.
Dishwasher tabs. My van doesn’t have a dishwasher 😅
The horn, never used one in any vehicle I've ever owned, it's there just to tell the world you're a ****.
The Starlight Headliner is pretty pointless. But when I’m kicking back after a hard day in the boardroom, it looks great.
I always thought the horn was there to inform everyone else they're a ****
The Starlight Headliner is pretty pointless. But when I’m kicking back after a hard day in the boardroom, it looks great.
The MX5 has a button that does that, but with real stars!
Agree about the "cornering lights" where the fog light comes on. I can't tell the difference if they're on or not, unless in a queue behind a shiny vehicle whilst signalling.
The medium and high settings on my work car's heated seats. I can just about handle the low setting for a few minutes, not that I really bother. However the medium and high are so warm I'd worry about melting any synthetic clothing I'm wearing!
On other cars, those indicators that replace the daylight running light when indicating. Genuinely more dangerous than separate ones IMO, due to being harder to spot at a quick glance as the lights look "balanced" side to side, all just to look a bit clever.
Ahhh that would explain it. The Mrs has a Mk3 MX5 with an auto box and I did wonder why the oil pressure needle moved with the gear changes 😀
Mind you, it can be run as full auto, flappy paddle or sequential (it’s really a 6 speed slush box) - clever I guess but I just leave it in auto.
this normally happens if you floor it (at some point on the pedal there might be a clicker, maybe not) you’re able to bypass the limit (but it may beep), if you drive gently it will hold you back (which is a sensible adjustment)
Nope, even says in the manual that it does not control your speed, it literally just controls the beeper! Even at slight throttle it just carries on accelerating regardless.
What happened to the good old days when people actually knew when it would be a good time to change gear?
given the number of people on here ignoring change gear lights, thus producing more emissions, it seems likely those days didn’t exist.
If I follow the shift indicator the engine can't maintain speed even at full throttle on the flat in 5th. It won't even accelerate in 4th. Known issue with my engine as it's a 1.2 3cyl with no power below 1800rpm, the shift indicator tells me to shift up at 2k. If I drive along using revs between 2 and 3k I can not only drive faster and put the engine under less strain it also uses less fuel. I can easily get 50mpg+ out of it even with a bike rack on the towbar, the book says it should only do 47mpg maximum. If I follow the shift lights I'm lucky to get 40mpg.
Eco mode. It makes it drive like I’ve filled it with water not petrol
My take on Eco mode. Makes no difference to performance, it just changes the throttle response so you need to push it over a notch to get the same acceleration on my Vauxhall. So I leave it on.
However, my van has a big light that fades from green through to orange depending on revs/acceleration. So I can drive gently and keep it green but it completely ignores the fact I'm able to slam on the brakes at every roundabout. Should take into account excessive braking to be useful, that's where the extra mpg's are hiding.
Oh and finally I've got a button showing an off camber track through a forest, but when you push it the display states you've enabled non-grip road mode. Of course you can't just call it off-road mode as someone will take their van bogging or something...
The sun visors in the Transit Connect. There's a massive gap in the middle where the mirror would be making it next to impossible to block the sun, not helped by the sneeze guard blocking access to the passenger sun visor (I have to supposedly protect me from a colleague who communicates by coughing it would seem).
The Eco button is only any use if the van is empty and even then I didnt notice any improvement in mpg.
It just feels like the turbo is broken and needs more gas to stay with traffic.
When a dash warning comes up saying ‘skid risk’, or ‘limited visibility’
Most pointless thing on my current car is the ability to do well over 70mph.
I used the speed limiter set to 70 during a trip on roads I didnt know well and thought it was great.
The gear change indicator is an interesting subject as I find it different so much from one car to another. My old fiat with hardly any torque wanted me doing about 1500rpm on flat roads, while my current car with much more torque wants me between 2000 and 3000rpm.
96 Toyota Hilux - idle speed control. I wish my life was interesting enough to need this.
Tesla Model 3 - where to start. It farts from individual seats? 🤷🏻♂️
DRLs that only work on front lights, not the rear, pointless and unsafe.
Bollocks. Your deliberate misunderstanding of what DRL’s are there for completely invalidates your argument. They are there specifically to make vehicles more visible to oncoming traffic in foggy or rainy daylight conditions so that idiots don’t try to overtake and run head-on into a 40-tonne truck, or car, or motorbike. Which also have DRL’s for that reason. The fact that stupid people don’t put their lights on when it’s dark or getting dark, or in thick fog is purely due to careless driving, or lack of attention. I’ve driven in town at night without my lights on because the street lights were so bright my headlights didn’t show on the road, as many others do, with DRL’s at least you can clearly see a car coming towards you at a junction, which you wouldn’t do otherwise. Following a car, you’ll be at roughly the same speed, and there are reflectors and number-plates that your own headlights will pick up some distance away. You are using your headlights, aren’t you?
Flappy paddles if I’d wanted to change gear I’d have bought a manual.
Sunglasses case under the rear view mirror – too small for midget glasses
My car has a semi-automatic ’box, and paddles, which I can use in Sport Mode, should I want to. I don’t, most of the time, because I’m in traffic and Drive Mode is all I need, which also allows auto stop/start; however, on a fairly empty A-road it’s fun to be able to shift when I want to, rather than the car deciding. I don’t have a manual ‘box because I have an arthritic left knee, and I find using a clutch, particularly in heavy or slow stop/start traffic, increasingly painful. There are some auto ‘boxes which are very slow to shift, (I’m looking at you, Peugeot and Citroen, and the Berlingo and Partner, and also the Nissan Juke), so having a manual override makes driving them a bit less irritating. I’m speaking from the point of view of someone who’s driven hundreds of different vehicles over the last four, going on five years, so I know pretty well what works for me by now.
As regards the glasses case above the rear-view mirror, mine’s quite big enough to hold a pair of RayBans, but a pair of Oakley Mumbos might be a struggle.
I bought my new car after having the opportunity to drive hundreds, and it has all the useful features that I wanted specifically, and none that I don’t, like heated seats, so it’s a win for me.
There are some auto ‘boxes which are very slow to shift, (I’m looking at you, Peugeot and Citroen, and the Berlingo and Partner, and also the Nissan Juke), so having a manual override makes driving
Out of interest what do you drive now? I test drove a Peugeot with a traditional automatic transmission and thought it was the smoothest and best performing auto box I'd driven. But then my last car was a Skoda with DSG.
When a dash warning comes up saying ‘skid risk’, or ‘limited visibility’
A "shart warning" light is clearly needed.
However, my van has a big light that fades from green through to orange depending on revs/acceleration. So I can drive gently and keep it green but it completely ignores the fact I’m able to slam on the brakes at every roundabout. Should take into account excessive braking to be useful, that’s where the extra mpg’s are hiding.
So what you want is a light that encourages you not to brake at roundabouts?
if I’d wanted to change gear I’d have bought a manual.
Pffft - who reads the manual?
Cigarette lighter.
Cup holders. The fact they don't actually hold anything other than a can of pop in place. Go round a corner and the cups fall over and leave the contents all over the floor. Its a van FFS, where workmen will want a cup of tea/coffee, so just make some that actually holds a cup!!
Lap timer. For my almost 2ton estate that’s never going near a track and even then most track days ban timing laps.
Flappy paddles if I’d wanted to change gear I’d have bought a manual.
Each to their own, but I find these very useful. Love the auto, but been able to select a gear before a potential manoeuvre is great to have. That's how I would drive a manual, so not sure why it would be a bad thing.
I've got one of those Soundaktors in my car....makes the 4-pot sound like a V8. Will get that coded out soon. Not a fan of the electric park brake either.
Next motor will do without.
Flappy paddles can be useful at times, but I'll get a manual next time.
96 Toyota Hilux – idle speed control. I wish my life was interesting enough to need this.
My work Hilux has this, its great when its -20 and the truck auto starts 30 minutes before I need it and is nice and warm before using it.
The first owner of my land rover was the queen (or whoever actually owns stuff the army drive around in). So, while it contains basically no features at all other than 4 wheels and an engine, it does have a couple of useless (for me) things:
1. Gun mounts (I don't have a gun)
2. Blackout switch (no function except confusing the MOT tester when none of the lights work)
3. Infra-red mode (don't think this actually does anything, sounds cool though)
Doors that open. Don't need 'em innit.

So what you want is a light that encourages you not to brake at roundabouts?
Yep. Its measuring the wrong pedal. We've a regular drive that is dual carriageway with lots of roundabouts. If I plan to go through each roundabout without braking (excluding the last few metres to stop/merge safely), the MPG will gradually climb from its average of 55mpg, I think it normally gets to about 69mpg and would go higher but I don't want to drive past my house! But...leaving the roundabouts, you can drive pretty normally without affecting it too much.
Sat Nav maps on the (quite nice) Panasonic stereo are so out of date they are getting more pointless every month. The only way to update them is dodgy complex 3rd party methods, or by paying Panasonic £150. Praise be Google Maps!
My car has an MPG swingometer, completely useless as it doesn’t show any meaningful information. Just waggles about.
What about the folks behind you in the dark when you have no lights on? At this time of year I see folk every day who clearly think their lights are on, as their dash is lit up.
I’ve moaned about this for years, and have always had cars that don’t light the dash up without the lights on - great 👍. The Polo even had a light sensor somewhere that meant the dash was lit up until it got dark, which was nice.
The new van lights the dash up all the time, I’m definitely going to be one of those forgetters at some point.
When a dash warning comes up saying ‘skid risk’, or ‘limited visibility’
That's quite useful, shirley? In newer cars the skid risk is actually a live warning from a car ahead which has triggered the ABS or traction control.
I'm with the "pointless" side on flappy paddles. My Volvo is equipped with them, but they're fastened to an 8-speed gearbox. On the odd occasion I've tried to use them I just got lost in the gearbox within about 30 seconds. And then I forgot that it was in manual and joined the motorway. It auto-shifts up at the red line but doesn't have a rev-counter, so I did about 40 miles with the engine at red-line minus 5%.
Good sound-proofing in the cabin though.