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My lad has just started watching Dr Who on DVD, starting with Eccleston. I used to get bought the box sets on DVD for Christmas every year and never watched them.
I dug out series 1 - 4 for the boy and my wife bought 5, 6 & 7. However, if I had looked more carefully on the next shelf of the DVD cabinet I would have seen that I already had 5, 6 & 7 unopened and still in their plastic wrappers.
We now have duplicates, I am out of pocket and I'm in the dog house.
What stupid thing have you done today?
Does anybody want to buy Dr Who series 5, 6 & 7?
Went to the Metro Centre.
Rode my bike at Machen! In the rain. In the slop
If 5, 6 & 7 are still in the packet could you return then in lieu of the ones you bought today?
To answer the question, took the kids to the mother in law's.
Braved the rain and cold and walked into town to the Christmas market (a majority of which is indoors)...
Only to find it ended yesterday... doh!
If 5, 6 & 7 are still in the packet could you return then in lieu of the ones you bought today?
They were bought weeks ago. The stupidity was discovered today, so I'm getting the shit as if I'd just done it now.
Managed some marking-out-stupidity, and then took three attempts to understand where (and how) I'd gone wrong
1. Let go of the fresh cut cable I was tying with cotton to new cable to thread through internals of<span style="font-size: 0.8rem;">t the frame.</span>
2. Managed to get the new cable end to splay and spiral up too far while threading through the new rear mech.
3. Repeated 1 while threading new, new cable through.
🙄🙄🙄
Went Christmas shopping.
Went to the Metro Centre.
I commented to the missus at least we didn't head over to the MetroCentre! Last payday before Christmas and all that..
Drank too much had an epic hangover...
Lost my minipump. Lezyne one, had it for yonks and it jumped out of the pocket of my Camelbak 🙁
We were in and out went to 2 shops Breadcrumb it was packed.
Tried to catch that last ball
JP from Liverpool
Free evening and weekend calls on the landline, as long as they're under an hour... Lost track of time, 1hr and 15secs, d'oh!
My ftp test didn’t go we well so I decided to drown my sorrows. Won’t make me faster will it.
Today, nothing. Tomorrow is another day...
Hill of beans etc.
Edit: actually, I *reaaly* offended someone with a tasteless joke. Totally mis-judged the audience with that one 🙄
I have done nothing stupid today.
This is a rare occurrence however...
Not today, but this week . Bought the missus a new phone and manged to delete two months of photos when I stupidly reformatted the SD card. I was excited. It was a new phone. I fessed up on Friday and she is nearly almost thinking about forgiving me. Nearly.
Replied in the classifieds thread.
Took a massive great slash out of my palm cutting a bagel 🙂
No excuses - annoyed with my son and therefore wasn't paying attention. Ironically I use knives all day at work (with appropriate PPE) and haven't cut myself with a knife in 20+ years.
Idiot.
Bought two xmas trees - we've never had two before but MrsSB says she wants one outside and, as I'm currently proceeding down the path of least resistance, I said yes.
The most annoying bit is that only yesterday I spent a stupid amount of money on some 'life changing' xmas tree holder (I bloody hate putting the tree up - can never get it straight) and yet I'm still going to have to use the old POS tree holder 🙁
This morning - drove 20 miles to Morrisons (bigger than local store) as had 20% colleague discount card, ready to stock up on alcohol etc for Christmas. Halfway through shopping realised left wallet in boot (dont ask). Went back, opened boot with remote key fob, took wallet out of boot, closed boot - with keys inside - they had fallen out of my hoodie into the boot, car if opened only by pressing remote then locks itself when boot closed. FFS. Go back to tell the wife the good news!. Turns out she had left her car keys and house keys on the back seat. My house keys are also on car key ring. So basically we could not get into car and if no way to get into our home to get the spare car key as both sets of house keys were in the (locked) car. Turning into a bit of a nightmare this...
Ended up my dad coming to pick us up, driving us to Mother-in-law (who had a spare house key for our house), driving us back home, me jumping/climbing over our 7 foot locked gate into the house to pick up the spare car key, then driving us back through to the shop again. About 100 miles altogether.
Was so hacked off when we got back to the shop that we decided not to get anything and just go back home. The 20% deal ended today but we DGAF by then!!!
Many many lessons learned from this !
Attempted to understand German articles + Nominative, Akkusative and Dative cases all blending in with Praesens and Perfect tense whilst conjugating Haben and Sein...
Mind. Blown.
Still, could be worse... dodged the IKEA bullet....
Inhaled, instead of swallowed, a pea. This sent me into a coughing fit. With a broken back and six broken ribs.
OMG.
How it hurt. 🙁
Drank two pints of Guiness, a Fosters, a Red Stripe, a Fosters shandy, and a shot of sambuca whilst recovering from a cold. It may have helped or hindered, not sure as yet.
Drank two pints of Guiness, a Fosters, a Red Stripe,
No one will top that.
Took my youngest to her classmate's birthday party at the local sports centre and drank two vending machine coffees, purely to pass the time.
I don't have great innards at the best of times, but on the back of two consecutive nights of curry and lager, this was a bridge too far.
There were rumblings.
It's okay, we'll be home in five minutes.
Two minutes into the journey, the lower abdomen is wanting to put talk into action. Not in three minutes. Right now.
Sebastien Loeb would have struggled to keep pace with me for the last stages of the drive back. Arrived home and had to leave the daughter locked in the car whilst I sprinted into the house. Had the belt unbuckled and trousers unbuttoned by the time I was halfway up the stairs.
Wife shouting after me, wondering what I've done with the child.
"STILLINTHECARSORRYABOUTTOSHITMYSELF"
Made it, but will be avoiding vending machine coffee in future.
Earlier in the week I moved the soil pipe in the house causing the roof to leak around it's flashing, in the process of moving it I put my foot thru the freshly plastered celling (had some floorboards up) I then went into the garage to add another socket and got 2 electric shocks. All in the space of 2 - 3 hours
I came to work.
After just over a week of being sugar free I caved yesterday and ate two packets of chocolate hobnobs.
Im confused. She bought the dvds yet you’re in the doghouse? I’d be getting quotes for a new patio, maybe she’ll take the hint.... 👍
so I’m getting the shit as if I’d just done it now.
From who ? The wife because you spent £10-20 ?
Aren't all the Dr Who's from Eccleston onwards on Netflix?
I gave up when Matt Smith arrived on the scene so no idea how recent they go up to.
My stupid thing is agreeing to swap the childrens bedrooms over which has included a full weekend of lugging furniture up and down stairs and creating so much clutter of unsorted toys and mess that there is no chance of getting any christmas decorations up this week much to the frustration of chrilden and wife.
Forgot my porridge...and my fancy sausage rolls 🙁
Im confused. She bought the dvds yet you’re in the doghouse? I’d be getting quotes for a new patio, maybe she’ll take the hint…
But she asked me if we already had them and I said "no".
Aren’t all the Dr Who’s from Eccleston onwards on Netflix?
They may be, but we don't do Netflix.
stevestunts wrote
<snip>
“STILLINTHECARSORRYABOUTTOSHITMYSELF”
Made it, but will be avoiding vending machine coffee in future.
Reminded me of this classic:
(edited to post the text as the link may not work)
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<h2 class="_5clb">What I did yesterday.</h2>
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<div>So then, in hindsight, yesterday, combining ordering one of the hottest curries I have ever eaten with finishing a three week long course of codeine, wasn’t the best idea that I’ve ever had…
For those of you not familiar with the side effects of codeine, let’s just say it makes the concept of having a quick, easy, painless, satisfying poo a thing of the past. Instead you find yourself sat on the pan, possibly for hours, squealing like Bruce Lee about to karate chop a brick in half, to produce a small brown pebble, the size of a rabbit dropping, but with the consistency of a lead shot that clatters into the bottom of the pan like some sort of ****ed up roulette ball. Indeed at one point last week I was considering whether it would be prudent to install grab handles and foot straps around the toilet in a desperate bid to improve leverage.
Needless to say, when you stop taking codeine, your guts soon return to normal, and due to the previous backlog, the chamber is very much cocked and loaded so to speak. Add to this the effect that the active ingredient in chilli has on increasing bowel motility and you have a recipe for disaster.
We’d taken my granny out to lunch to celebrate her 98th birthday to a local pub famous for it’s Indian food and décor. Without thinking, I ordered the Goan Beef (hot), which in retrospect was a schoolboy error of judgement.
The first I became aware that some sort of problem was imminent was in the car as I drove my mother and grandmother back from the dinner. We were about fifteen minutes from home when I noticed a peculiar contraction feeling in my abdominal region and felt my guts make a ‘fludup’ sound.
Think of the theme from Jaws-
Fluuuduuuup….fluuuduuuup,...fluuuduuuup…fluuuduuup, fluudup, fluduup, as the sounds and feelings became both more intense and closer together. Those of you with experience of childbirth will know that this sequence of events usually signals the imminent arrival of something.
By this time my mother had picked up that I wasn’t feeling very well. The signs of me going deathly pale, utterly silent, and a cold sweat pouring down my forehead were enough to alert her to my distress.
“Are you feeling ok” she enquired?
“I’ve felt better” I replied, “that curry’s really had an effect on me”, as my bowel did yet another contraction – fluudduuuup.
“We can stop at that Little Chef if you like?” she said.
Fluudduuuup.
Images of the toilet scene from Trainspotting flashed through my mind.
“Nope it’s ok” said I, “we’re only five minutes from home, and I think I can make it”, as I pressed the accelerator to the floor. Fortunately Granny was unaware of the imminent crisis going on beside her.
Fluudduuuppp.
“I hope the level crossing isn’t down”, said my mother helpfully.
Fluuudddduuupppp.
Now normally I’m not the superstitious type, but when you’re facing the prospect of possibly shitting yourself in the car in front of two of your elderly female relatives, this isn’t the sort of comment that you want to hear, and I’m afraid I may have lost it a little bit.
“WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT? GOOD GOD MOTHER, IF THERE’S A TRAIN COMING, YOU’RE GOING TO END UP WITH A CAR SEAT FULL OF SHIT, AND A SMELL THAT YOU’LL NEVER GET OUT. WHY? WHY? WHY?”
As you can tell, I’d left my normally sanguine self behind, and was quite upset at this point. However fortune did favour the desperate, and the level crossing was clear, and apart from a few people blithely and selfishly observing the speed limit on the way home, we made it to the road that my mother’s house is on without further ado. Now normally I’d drive in, past the front door, do a leisurely three point turn on the drive, and then draw peacefully up facing back the way I’d came in front of the door, so that the passenger door and thus my granny was adjacent to the front door, so that we can help her in using her walking frame.
Not this time. Having had the presence of mind to pre-warn my mother, I screeched up to the front door like something out of The Sweeney (it’s a 70s cop show for the younger readers amongst you), and leapt out of the driver’s side like a man possessed, which in a sense I was, and dived towards the front door, to put the key in the lock and open the door before tossing the keys back in the direction of my mother.
As I opened the door, once again lady luck decided to piss briefly on my chips, and my mother’s dog (Beetle), having been cooped up for the duration of three whole ****ing hours decided that now was the time to make a break for freedom and dashed out into the street.
Happily my cry of “GETBACKINTHEHOUSENOWYOULITTLEBUGGER” managed to stop him in his tracks, and so ears down, tail between his legs, his bid for freedom was curtailed as my size 10s gave him a helpful boot back in through the door, as I legged it up the hall whilst simultaneously undoing my belt.
Now let me tell you, getting up the stairs, whilst simultaneously dropping your trousers and undercrackers is no mean feat. In fact Usain Bolt had nothing on me today, I was like greased lightening, and for good reason.
Now dear reader, those of you of a more sensitive disposition may like to stop reading here. What happened in that bathroom when I got there is for the strong of stomach only. I suggest that if you’re sneakily perusing this in your lunch break that you stop reading now, and finish your lunch before you carry on, for hereafter it does get quite scatological.
The sound. What can I say about the sound, other than it will stay with me for the rest of my life. Imagine if you will the sound of a large bucket of slippery eels being poured down an even bigger funnel liberally greased with butter. For a very long time. In fact there was more than one bucket. And then some smaller buckets. And then an enormous bucket. Some smaller ones again, and then one more big one. And finally one small one. It was a bit like when there’s an earthquake, you know that there are aftershocks coming, and it’s unclear when they’ll stop. When you hear a sound that awful, combined with the other assault on my senses, something very strange happens, and you start to see yourself in the third person as if you’re looking down from above. I’m sure it must be some sort of coping mechanism to distance yourself from the trauma of what’s just happened.
The smell. Best not mention the smell, only to say that when The Event went down, a small shockwave similar to that which you see in nuclear detonations was sent out in all directions. It’s a good job the dog was still downstairs, as he’s only small, and that level of noxious gases could easily have been fatal.
So then it was over. I looked down between my legs to survey the devastation that I had wrought. Tiny patches of white porcelain were visible inbetween the fizzing brown morass. I won’t describe what was in the water. Fortunately in my mother’s bathroom there is a sink next to the toilet, so I was able to wet some toilet paper under the cold tap, in order to start what may euphemistically be called ‘The Clean Up Operation'. For some reason as I was dabbing gently, the Johnny Cash song ‘Ring of Fire’ kept on going through my head.
All cleaned up, I walked back downstairs. Mother and granny were now out of the car, and safely ensconced in the living room. As I walked into the room with a thousand yard stare like a war veteran with PTSD, my mother helpfully piped up “Well it’s a good job we’ve got three toilets in this house, because I’m guessing that one’s not going to be habitable for a good few hours”.
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</div>
Arranged bank transfer to nephew for XMas gift, used wrong card, ear has been bent.
Arranged to take bike into shop for them to loosen a bolt I had done up so tight I couldn't now remove it. I was sat in the car park listening to torrential rain on the roof of the car prior to pulling the bike out of the boot for the final few miles to the shop (out of town free parking), realised that while I was dressed in my riding gear and being wet was just one of those things I had no undercrackers or spare dry socks in my bag.
Dr Who’s from Eccleston
I never knew. I thought he was from Gallimaufry or some such.
Drinking a load of coffee all morning, then being surprised at needing a Tom Kite halfway round my lunchtime run.
Just managed to surpass myself. Walked to the Co Op to get some lunch. Picked up a can of soup and some bread, paid for it. turned to walk out of the door and realised I already had a tub full of left over roast dinner in the fridge at work!
At least I have lunch sorted for tomorrow now.
Not today, Saturday, a couple of friends had invited us to a nice knock-up Christmas dinner with them and 7 other people. I hadn't eaten much all day - hadn't really felt hungry tbh - so was ready to get stuck in when we arrived. We'd brought pigs in blankets and apple crumble with custard; the PnB were used as a snack to whet the appetite.
It was a good spread, turkey, stuffing, all the potatoes, parsnips and carrots, sprouts, gravy etc, and everyone was really getting into it. The wine was flowing freely too; and the crumble and custard was the icing on the cake. There was tons of crumble, so even though I was feeling full I had a second (generous) portion.
Needless to say I really wasn't feeling well after that, but still had to be sociable with everyone. I tried not to concentrate on how rough my stomach was feeling from eating way too much as I made smalltalk, but it was getting more and more difficult. Fortunately the wife realised that we needed to get home for the dog, so suggested about 1130 that we should leave, which was music to my ears. Unfortunately, of course, everyone being very friendly, wanted to take ages to say farewell, and I was by now struggling to keep my dinner down. I legged it out, made it just outside the front door before having to chuck. And everyone now apparently thinks I'm antisocial for not saying goodbye properly.
Not today, Thursday.
Went to measure a building full of laser guided missiles.
Tried to gain access with a laser measure.
Security were not impressed.
According to eldest spawn, my biggest crime today was refusing to let her have a lolly out of the sweetie jar and have a non-fruit pudding after tea.
After half an hour of screaming at me, I think she's gone off to phone social services.
Took the clippers to my hair on the weekend, though I had done a tidy job until I spotted a bit sticking up after I took my beanie off coming home, no problem I thought and grabbed the clippers forgetting I'd taken the guard off. I not hav e a bit missing, no issue normally I'd just even it all up,but it's winter and I'm going on my first night ride in a long time tomorrow!! Still at least 2 days before work again
Took the clippers to my hair on the weekend, though I had done a tidy job until I spotted a bit sticking up after I took my beanie off coming home, no problem I thought and grabbed the clippers forgetting I’d taken the guard off. I not hav e a bit missing, no issue normally I’d just even it all up,but it’s winter and I’m going on my first night ride in a long time tomorrow!! Still at least 2 days before work again
Marker pen to fill in the gaps!