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I just decided I fancied a cheese and pickled onion butty. Like one does of a Friday afternoon, when one has been working from home, and therefore not passing a Greggs
So I went to get the pickled onions out of the cupboard and noted that there was a jar already open, plus another five unopened jars. Now I'm quite partial to the odd pickled onion, but this seems excessive. I've no idea where they all came from, or why on five occasions, while doing the shopping I thought to myself "I'll just get some more pickles, just in case"
What anomalies have you discovered in your household logistics?
Sarcasm.
Bucketloads to spare. More than a man can dish out in a lifetime.
In the second drawer in the kitchen (every kitchen has 'that drawer', and in ours it's the second drawer), there are probably approaching 100 safety pins. I know not from whence they came, but there they are.
Old Apple 30 pin cables.
We have more Lightning devices than we ever had 30 pin ones, but can I find a Lightning cable when I want to? Can I buggery.
More than a man can dish out in a lifetime.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, right.
🙂
Yeah, right.
Well aren't you Mr Clever?
Steez, more than I can fit into all the whips I'll ever style. Bro.
Rapeseed oil.
Bought a bottle at Aldi (not Booths, too posh/expensive) & when I got home I found 3 unopened ones in the cupboard plus a half full one.
I just decided I fancied a cheese and pickled onion butty.
And it's phrases like this that make ladies across the land associate the name Binners with an image like
Self raising flour
half way round the supermarket I think "I know, I'll make a cake later"...then I try to remember if I've flour in the cupboard, so I buy a 500g pack just in case. The answer is of course. "Yes, you bloody idiot, you've enough sodding flour to bake a cake the size of your house, stop buying it"
Tyre levers. FAAAAAAASANDS of 'em.
Also, grape scissors. More than several pairs.
Ear hairs.
Tyre levers. FAAAAAAASANDS of ’em.
Same here. Although none, it turned out, in the bag I take riding 🙁
😆 @IHN (not the tyre levers! The suave binners!)
Seriously - music. Vinyl, cassettes, minidiscs, CDs and millions of files I'll never ever get a chance to listen to more than once or even that. And I've got internet "basket"s full of new stuff too. Make it stop.
'Suave' is definitely the first word on the laydeeez lips when they think of me. Definitely not fat, bald, irritating or 'smells of pickles' 😀
What do you mean 'or'?
Also, grape scissors
huh...grape scissors, who knew?...Everyday's a school day...
I was thinking that. I've never heard of grape scissors. Are they what one buys as a gift for the international jet-setter who has everything*?
* including 14 pairs already
grape scissors - the tool for emasculating your standard grape so that it becomes seedless.
‘smells of pickles’
Baby wipes; I appear to order them in multiples of 10 then forget I have loads, order more and find the last delivery when putting the new ones away.
I do not have children.
Who, on this forum, would own grape scissors??
Oh. Just scrolled up. *nods*
Are they what one buys as a gift for the international jet-setter who has everything*?
* including 14 pairs already
My LBS bought me a monogrammed 'executive' back scratcher for Christmas.
Re the grape scissors, inherited a collection of them, all silver.
Bikes. Last time I looked I had about 7. I only remember buying 2.
And Bran Flakes. If post Brexit, food is scarce I have sufficient to provision the entire population of Herefordshire for around a month. They’ll need to bring their own milk tho 🙂
I think grape scissors are the ones with short and stocky blades for doing a short, powerful cut through a grape stalk.
They live next to the herb shears in the 3rd drawer from the sink.
Tape measures. I can only measure one thing at a time and although I can see the requirement for having a small pocket-sized one for trips to the DIY store (so I look the part) along with a 500m behemoth in case I need to visit a trade counter, but I appear to have collected around 300 of them, secreted in drawers and tool boxes around the house and workshop.
secreted in drawers and tool boxes around the house and workshop.
I bet, if they're anything like many tape measures in our house, you can still never bl00dy find one when you need one though, eh?
Cats, we appear to be up to four now.......
a 500m behemoth
That's a big 'un.
I'm a professional measurer and my laser only does 200m.
Ooh, get him and his "I've got a laser" humblebrag.
Hair gel, I don't actually use much but it's always on 2 for 1 and I can never remember if I have any spares when I'm at the supermarket so buy it just in case. Think I had 6 tubes of it last time I checked which is probably 2-3 years supply. No doubt I'll buy more in the next month or two (although maybe this thread is enough memory reinforcement that I have enough...)
Ooh, get him and his “I’ve got a laser” humblebrag.
I have an inexplicable abundance of them 😉
I’m a professional measurer
I've got a 12 incher but I don't use it as a rule.
XT 9 speed 11-34 cassettes, unused.
Got about 7 of them in my spares box.
Excuses
And handlebars, I'm not even that fussy, couldn't tell you what rise or sweep my current bike has, or even their width. I ride narrow ones, wide ones, flat ones, riser ones, weird bendy ones, but for some reason I never want to put one of the 15 or so pairs in my spares box on a new bike?
Razor blades, got a selection of makes to see which ones I prefered, then decided to grow a beard so use about 1 a year.
Shaving parifielia, every year some non thinking relative gets me a designer/cosmetics company wash bag which inevitably includes face wash, moistuiser/shave balm, and saving gel.
Wash bags - see above, at least 4 of them.
Modesty.
That and mugs. 2 people live in our house, and I don’t drink tea or coffee, yet we have dozens of mugs...
along with a 500m behemoth
Bet that’s really satisfying to press the button to roll up *sssnick*
Holi powder- about 30 kilos
blue smoke grenades
And handlebars, I’m not even that fussy, couldn’t tell you what rise or sweep my current bike has, or even their width
I have a good collection of those too. Even short flat steel ones off my kid's old bike. Why do I keep them?
And some new carbon ones. Unfitted. Why did I buy them?
Girth.
And dislike for Spanish outsourcing companies that make Manuel look like a ... flipping.. genius.
I reckon I've got about 6 pairs of handlebars in the corner of the shed too
Is 10 vacuum cleaners too many got one person?
brant will be along in a minute with a p-x/on-one stock check...
6 pairs of handlebars
So, 12 handlebars then?
Lifetime bags from supermarkets. Enough to last, well, several lifetimes in fact.
Bottles of opened lemon and lime juice, they are taking over the fridge!
Oh and enough pots, pans and baking trays to sink a battleship... Despite there just being two of us.
tea lights!
They are breeding in the cupboard. Seriously there are bags of the things. My wife appears to be 'prepping' for some mass blackout post apocalyptic future. I didn't think Brexit was going to be that bad...
Espresso cups, the teeny weeny ones (not the British versions that seem to hold about a bucketful) Nah.. those teeny Italian jobbies that hold about a thimble full of exquisite caffeine.
Everywhere I go, I look out for a bOutique little coffee shop and end up buying a couple of cups...
I have a kitchen cupboard top shelf rammed with them, yet only seem to use a handful on rotation. 👀👅👃
Chargers and charger leads. Whenever I want to charge something up I’ll be able to find the correct connection, correct Voltage, Correct Current rating. Sadly not all at the same time.
Had a purge the other day and disposed of all the Nokia chargers I think, although one may be for my clippers. It’s hard to be sure.
Inner tubes.
I seem to have spent a few years finding a flat tyre just before a ride, can't remember which of the used tubes lying about in the garage have been patched and which haven't, so I'll just stick a new one in and patch the other one later... which to be fair I generally do, but not consistently enough that I'm confident next time I find a flat which ones have been patched and are good or maybe that one's still waiting to be fixed, so I'll stick a new one in for now so I can just repair that one later....
If anyone needs a substantial collection of used 26" inner tubes, in varying degrees of repair, let me know.
On that note.
I've got loads of used brake pads. I have no idea why I keep them.
Suture scissors. Apparently also good for grapes.
XT 9 speed 11-34 cassettes, unused.
Got about 7 of them in my spares box.
I'll take em!
Loads of bars and seatposts, also quite a lot of ladies saddles that Mrs Grips went through trying to find something that fit.
But the two things that sprang to mind are caravans and nasturtiums.
Flashy - if I don’t see you on a forthcoming edition of the Antiques Roadshow with your collection of silver grape scissors, then there simply won’t be the words to describe my disappointment
Excuses - got thousands of them for every possible circumstance I might need to explain away...........
So, 12 handlebars then?
You wouldn't wear a trousers would you?
Children.
Overdraft.
Garden weeds.
odd socks 100s of them never seem to buy them .. match them up after a few months they then become seperated again why?
Like the OP but, hot chocolate. There's about 7 jars in the cupboard and they've probably all only had one drink taken out of them.
Cotic solaris’sisi... three of em at the last count...
pairs brand new of unworn jeans. Why, a new pair arrived just this very afternoon... (in the lee sale, half price plus a further 10% and, obvs, big windows).
and ‘obsolete’ bike parts (inc a 10 speed boxed XT groupset... and, yup, several pairs of handlebars inc 762’s for 6 years ago in its wrapper...).
oh, and post it pads. 🤷♂️
I seem to have acquired several packets of powered Hollandaisse sauce but the bizarre thing is most people have this with eggs or Salmon of which i eat neither! Even more bizarre is i dont like Hollandaisse sauce, nobody in this household does. I simply cant find a reason why we have it.
Wimmins toiletries. Everywhere. I am allowed to keep my supplies in a single washbag hanging from the bog door; she has a large bespoke glass fronted cupboard, plus numerous windowsills, tops of chests of drawers etc etc.
Anyway, why do girls wear perfume and makeup?
Hoodies and coloured pens
Teaspoons. I have many dozens off them. Never bought one.
Kids wetsuits. More than one of every size from 4 to 16. Also have an abundance of generous family!
Plasterboard (free to collect from Galashiels/Peebles area if anyone wants some?) Also a bag of plaster
Some wierd rubber/elastic strap/bungee things with a plastic hook on them, massive bag full from god knows where.
Anyway, why do girls wear perfume and makeup?
Coz they stink and be ugly...
We seem to have dozens of Barclays pens.
Teaspoons. I have many dozens off them. Never bought one.
Proper tea(spoons) is theft, comrade!
Part worn, slightly damaged but possibly serviceable 26inch MTB tyres
I understand why I have loads of 700c tyres. I bought tyres I really don't like and am too community spirited to sell them to some poor sod who might ride on them to misery.
Odd bolts, screws and washers that I've kept just in case and which never actually seem to ever get used.
Lifetime bags. MrsMC loves going into foreign supermarkets and comes out with empty bags. Grape scissors? I thought they were for when you had a bunch of grapes of your own.
Pens and pencils in weird / glittery colours. How does 1 child accumulate so many and where do all my plain blue / black pens disappear too.
Stem ginger in syrup - 4 jars - small pieces are used as decoration on ginger cake.
Horseradish sauce - 6 jars - only use it as an accompaniment to roast beef.
Suncream and insect repellant - buy it for every holiday as I can never find the stuff I know I have before the holiday. Come to put the new stuff away after the holiday and find dozens of jars of the old stuff.
Stem ginger in syrup – 4 jars
look up Jamie Olivers recipe for grilled strawberries - soooo nice and will take care of your stem ginger surplus.
tea lights!They are breeding in the cupboard. Seriously there are bags of the things.
My mother recently had a new boiler installed in her house in a cupboard under the stairs which up until then had been a dumping ground for random kitchenware & tinned food.
When I reshelved it to accommodate this fine new boiler, it got a complete sort out but there were hundreds of tea lights. Oh and evaporated milk. Must have been 8 tins of it. I have this vision of a post-apocalyptic world with my mother crouched round tea lights living off evaporated milk...
Yes, we have the tea light thing going on. Plus cans of mixed pulses, which are obviously bought in a moment of good intentions, never to be actually used.
I thought grape scissors were a surgical instrument used for dealing with haemmorhoids?
Stem ginger in syrup – 4 jars
look up Jamie Olivers recipe for grilled strawberries – soooo nice and will take care of your stem ginger surplus.
Or or just eat it straight from the jar - yum, yum 😋
Toothbrushes - every time I go to buy one in the supermarket I get a multi pack. Then forget I've got them, repeat, repeat, repeat.
Earphones. Every time I go on a trip I get to the airport and realise I forgot to pack them, so I have to buy a pair from Dixons.
GT85. It always seems to be on offer in Aldi and I can't resist.
Two things stick out from the list above: throw out all the old self-raising flour as it goes stale remarkably quickly. Cakes are much better with fresh flour (which is less likely to have weevils in it) and get rid of some of those tape measures. If you want to make something good, always use just the one tape measure - and make sure the end stop isn't bent and there isn't excessive play in the rivets.