Wedding Presents
 

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[Closed] Wedding Presents

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Posts: 6
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You are sold into slavery and bought by Nigel Farage to be his wife. As a wedding gift, a wise wizard offers you one of three gifts. Which do you choose:

[url= http://itotd.com/articles/411/hymirs-cauldron/ ][b]The Cauldron of Hymir[/b][/url] (which will brew on command limitless quantities of the finest mead there has ever been;

[b]A sophisticated virtual reality immersion tank[/b] in which you can remain in an immersive simulation indefinitely. The immersion tank will prolong your lifespan to about 300 years, although it is not guaranteed that you will be able to exit the tank. The simulation will be chosen for you by Richard Madeley, or (in the future) by a computer into which Richard Madeley’s personality has been uploaded and may change from time to time.

[b]The Sword of Bees[/b]. This sword is a mighty magical weapon which allows you to defeat a powerful adversary in battle. However, when it strikes down your enemy, it will tear out your entrails and you will die in your moment of triumph.

What will you choose?


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 8:20 am
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The Cauldron Of Hymir without a single doubt. I'd need to be seriously inebriated simply to cope with looking at Farage. Does it also give a +10 to constitution, but with a -20 to acrobatics?


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 8:41 am
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Can I not have a matching kettle and toaster?


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 8:51 am
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Richard madeley doesn't have a personality . I'd go for the booze


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 8:56 am
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None of them, I would just be content with the fact that I was married to Nigel Farage 😯

Probably the cauldron 😉


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 9:08 am
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John Lewis vouchers, please!


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 9:12 am
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Could I re-purpose the Cauldron Of Hymir as a wok? That's the one I'd probably go for, unless someone else had already bought us a wok. No household needs two woks.


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 9:17 am
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Richard Madeley's quite a nice guy, I doubt he'd punish you.


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 9:17 am
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Married to Farage, have to be a Brassneck surely?


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 9:47 am
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Don't worry , I got it!


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 10:04 am
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The sword, obviously. I'd use it on husband dearest, preferably at the altar, and as i died in gurgling agony I'd comfort myself with the knowledge every moment spent with Nige would be immeasurably worse.


 
Posted : 29/03/2017 12:29 pm
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Topic starter
 

The sword, obviously. I'd use it on husband dearest, preferably at the altar,

A hero arises! dangeourbrain is the man our nation needs. 🙂


 
Posted : 30/03/2017 2:03 am
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Married to Farage! Anyone can make a mistake, but come on!


 
Posted : 30/03/2017 6:23 am

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