Toys from your childhood that were rubbish

The cheaper Tamiya’s were affordable, something like a Thundershot or Madcap

After a long time pouring over the catalogue I can confirm The Grasshopper was the cheapest, followed by The Hornet and then The Striker.  Thunder shot was 4WD and mid range (I was super excited when I got one).

I'm not having subbuteo in this list.

When you got it, yes it was crap. A bit like a snooker table, when you celebrate wildly a break of a red, any coulour and another red before putting the white. Or you're first bike when you can't ride.

But the magic of subbuteo, waslike riding a bike, like snooker, with enough hours, it suddenly becomes awesome. When you know what your doing and can spin the little fella's fairly consistently and accurately and have a bit of "touch", it suttenly turns into a really fast game, running round the table end to end. At Uni, my mates and I couldn't do more than 15 minute halfs, we'd be exhausted. But you needs to see it being played by people who are half good, before it makes any sense.

Subbuteo football was OK, but Subbuteo cricket was total rubbish.

...and leaving the room to get a Vimto...

Anagram of vomit

Matchbox Motorway, now that was properly awful. Really disappointed within about two minutes at a procession of (my) Matchbox cars around a track.
A continuous spring ran in a groove in the track, you stuck a plastic peg to the underside of the car, engaged it in the spring coils and the car was pulled around. No overtaking, massive friction so very slow, a bit like a 60s imagining of the M25

I still have the Matchbox Motorway, and can confirm it was rubbish. The only slightly good thing was you could put loads of cars onto the same spring and pretend it was a real motorway (but way??).

Very noisy as well.

No overtaking, massive friction so very slow, a bit like a 60s imagining of the M25

FTFY