Time to throw the towel in

Could you not try other less impactful forms of excercise? Swimming, hiking, yoga? If you're going for long periods without excercise then going back at it too hard to make up for lost time then that's going to have a big impact on your body, particularly with sports that cause a lot of strain like football and running. Even cycling, when the doctors say cycling (clarified this with GP family member when I had knee problems) is a great form of excercise with little strain on the body, they're thinking of a gentle ride on mostly flat land which isn't really putting any strain on the body but keeps you moving for an extended period of time. Road cycling with big hills or mountainbiking isn't that!

Maybe concentrate on mastering something genuinely low impact for a while, then add another to the mix, and then maybe look at just getting out and about on the bike and slowly building up from there. If you set yourself realistic goals and a long term plan you're less likely to get so demoralized and feel held back which you're currently feeling

or back running and playing football

Both of these are horrendous for injuries when you aren't fit, or highlighting issues that you didn't know you had.

I’ve mentioned my back injury that basically started this downward spiral back in 2018. That got better,

Did it get better enough? I had a back injury in my mid 20's that didn't give me any problems until my early 40's. It had got "better". Now it's not better, it's a bloody nuisance is what it is.

I would recommend stopping everything and going to a strength and conditioning coach and following a very carefully thought through 2 month plan.

I did that back in 2016 or so after thinking I was totally on the scrap heap - I was able to get through reserve commando training in 2020 after that, ran several marathons and god knows what else.

What you do have to do is commit to the program and believe it is working...

I gave up football in my late 20s because of injuries. No major incident, but constant small injuries that added up over time, removing  my ability to keep fit and thus perpetuating a vicious cycle. As above, switch to a low impact exercise. Take it easy. Get medical advice and a good Physio. Good luck.

Maybe looking at it as "exercise" is part of the problem? Don't exercise any more. Just "go out" instead. Easy bike rides. / walks / golf / swim whatever. Look at it as just the activity for enjoyments sake (and thus better mental health). Do whatever doesn't give you an injury and have fun.

yeah nothing wrong with giving up running and especially football to avoid injury!

yoga is hugely underrated by most people for fitness & strength, it’s also great for injury prevention - doesn’t sound like you’re really doing any stretching/flexibility/strength or full-body work? Can be very positive for mood/MH also.

As others are saying, football and running are high impact and hard on the body.

Perhaps rather than give up all exercise it is a case of finding other things to do - swimming, yoga, cycle pootling / touring / meander, etc

Because of all this, I can’t get fit.

There's (obviously) a difference between exercise for health, and exercise for fitness. Even if you can't do the latter, do the former. Make things like your HbA1c  replacement for watts/kg, use, I dunno, BMI instead of RHR that sort of thing; I can't run at the the minute as my lower back is sore, but I can do yoga and go for a walk...The things you need to do for those measurements are no less difficult and challenging, and after some time, when you've worked on your internal rather than external measurements, by the time you are in a place to get fit again, you're starting from a healthier place.

I spent months, almost a year, recovering from my back injury with strength and conditioning. And with no surprise, was constantly interupted with injury, cramping hamstrings, tight glutes etc. I can accept I get injured, but it is constant. There is always something wrong that stops me from exercising. I built up the strenght in my back, glutes etc. I feel like all that is gone again.

Historically, I played football for most of my life. Pretty much injury free until these last couple of years.

I've tried swimming a few years ago after my back injury. I can't really swim and found it very frustrating. Even after lessons.

My latest round of physio resulted in cramping hamstrings again. I highlighted it with the physio and changed some of the strecthes. I had no range in them, the would cramp under any loaded stretch.

I know what you mean about injury and recovery time as you get older. Bent a few fingers back in August, only just about recovered now.

I'm "only" 54.

On the yoga side of it, I can't. I'm not supple. I have really really poor flexibility. The most basic yoga poses will have my hamstrings cramping or my back pulling. I've tried multiple times. Everytime my body get's stressed, it just seems to give up. The exercises I did for my lower back were very limited due to all that.

I know this probably seems a bit ridiculous or trivial, but I'm utterly fed up with it.

Historically, I played football for most of my life. Pretty much injury free until these last couple of years.

Nah, no such thing as an "injury free" footballer.
Jut not injured enough to stop them playing.

You have my sympathies. My last 6 months have been spent in ct and mri machines, and every time one part of the body heals, another breaks down. 

im going to undertake a strengthening programme over the winter to try to improve the outlook

Do whatever doesn’t give you an injury and have fun

That would limit me to sitting on the sofa. This mornings dog walk included really sharp knee/shin pain. I hobbled for an hour. Tonights walk will likely be pain free, like nothing has happened, then tomorrow it will be something else.

The day I stopped running was the day my injury problems started going away.

I've been through horrendous periods of injury that stopped all sorts of fun stuff and exercise.

My advice is just go and do something else for a bit, stay active but focus on something else or new. Walking is great, make some walking plans and tick them off.

In time a lot of my injuries healed upl and eventually I got back

I took most of 2022 off stcolin to refocus - just rode with my kids mainly, didn't see z3 or above for 10 months. Similar to what you're saying with the body needing some attention, had chest pains I needed to get a proper opinion on, back and sports hernia issues. Started regular gym work which was a huge difference-maker. Got back on it in a much better place.

You have to be realistic, though - you don't really fix musculoskeletal issues on an aging body in a one-and-done way. It's more of a lifetime commitment. But you can get a lot of agency and control over things, which is what sounds like you're missing atm.

On the yoga side of it, I can’t. I’m not supple. I have really really poor flexibility.

Uh-huh, You should watch me, it's like watching a statue do yoga. But regardless of how lame my bridge pose or my cat-cow, I can feel the benefit. Walking feels stupid compared to running but at slow speeds the health benefits overlap pretty considerably

TBH if you think its bad now see how well it goes without any form of exercise in later life 🙂

Engineer more pootling in your ride routine and mix it up, its easy to get too fixated and do to much without enough rest.

TBH Playing football,running and riding(non-pootling) are pretty harsh on the body.

On the yoga side of it, I can’t. I’m not supple. I have really really poor flexibility. The most basic yoga poses will have my hamstrings cramping or my back pulling.

Yea, I have no control. Speaking of hernias, got one of them too. Getting worse.

I love football too much to give it up, but accept it will happen. I don't mind walking, but would always rather cycle. I probably need to get over myself and just ride for the sake of it and not worry about getting fitter or faster etc. That's a whole other disussion.

But nothing othet than walking for now until my legs recover enough.

On the yoga side of it, I can’t. I’m not supple. I have really really poor flexibility. The most basic yoga poses will have my hamstrings cramping or my back pulling. I’ve tried multiple times.

That’s the whole point of it. You’re not going to be able to do some human origami thing that yoga instructors seem to be able to do. Short and regular sessions and it’ll improve, it just takes time.

Stop beating yourself up over it and don’t compare what you used to be able to do to what you can or can’t do now, it’ll just frustrate you. Take it slow and steady me you’ll find improvements. From what you’ve mentioned about your physio, I’d also be looking for another one to see if they’re any better. A good physio can make a huge difference.

That sounds really rough and I can see why you'd feel dispirited.

I know you didn't really ask for alternative activities and I know it hardly sounds like exercise but along with MTB, I play table tennis for a very very low level league team in my area. We come up against teams of all ages, up to folks in their 80's sometimes and I've always thought of it as a sport that you can make as "active" as you want to and that I'll probably play my entire life.

For me (39 years old) I get up a proper sweat and it's an okay light workout.For other folks with less mobility they still get a base level of exercise. It is really good for your reactions and you have to think and focus really hard. It's also very skill based which scratches an adjacent itch for me to mountain bike skills stuff.

Whatever it is, I hope you find something that can help.

Giving up exercise will make things far worse. What you need is the right exercise.

at the risk of over-simplifying it, is that not the cause of all the problems then? Especially with a really dynamic activity like football? Maybe just start off really slow/gentle and built up? But it’s not (supposed) to be a quick fix, or something you do for 6 months/a year, you need to stick with it & make it part of your routine.

It has become part of my routine. I have never rushed back, I always take care. I always warm up and I don't push my luck.

The cramping hamstrings are linked to my back. My weak back and glutes. I've been working on these for years, but the issues remain.

During my knee physio, I got my bloods taken to rule out any inflammatory issue. Thankfully there wasn't. I do worry something else at play.

On the yoga side of it, I can’t.

It sounds like you are an all-or-nothing sort of person. The whole point of Yoga or Pilates is to gain flexibility and strength, so if you can't do it you're exactly the person who needs it. But as said, start small. If you'd never ridden a bike before, you wouldn't expect to jump on one and do a century or a BPW black obviously.

I do worry something else at play.

It's probably more useful to concentrate on the things you can effect a change in rather than worry about unknowns.

A couple of years on and my favourite Kassandra video on YouTube is still the 30 minutes Beginner session. She closes with "don't worry if it was hard, just know that every time it'll get easier". She's partially right I guess 😂. I really wish I'd discovered yoga when I was your age and not in my 60's. 

You gotta do what you can do and not look back at trying to relive your youth. After a while, maybe you'll begin to stretch yourself some more. But whatever you do, don't become the couch potato you'll begin to hate. 

On the yoga side of it, I can’t. I’m not supple. I have really really poor flexibility. The most basic yoga poses will have my hamstrings cramping or my back pulling. I’ve tried multiple times. Everytime my body get’s stressed, it just seems to give up. The exercises I did for my lower back were very limited due to all that.

All the more reason to do it. I can't touch my toes or stuff like that, so thats why i now do yoga (when i remember to) rather than thats why i don't. 

A couple of years on and my favourite Kassandra video on YouTube is still the 30 minutes Beginner session.

I do one that was posted on Pink Bike a couple of years ago titled Yoga for mountain bikers with a sore back, it's 25- mins or so if I get through it without grunting...win.

OP, definitely go and see your GP.

It may be worth discussing medically unexplained symptoms with them when you see them?

What is your diet like? That will be affecting both mind and body.

There's a big push these days to encourage people to cut down/out processed foods. That's a game changer for a lot of people.

You just need to get through a couple of weeks of cravings to start seeing benefits.

You gotta do what you can do and not look back at trying to relive your youth. After a while, maybe you’ll begin to stretch yourself some more. But whatever you do, don’t become the couch potato you’ll begin to hate.

I am really struggling with getting older. I feel like everything I used to do is slipping away with nothing left.

Kassandra video on YouTube is still the 30 minutes Beginner session

Tried that particular video a few times. Too difficult for me. I couldn't even manage to get into some of the starting positions, never mind doing the actual stretches.

What is your diet like? That will be affecting both mind and body

It's not great. Far too much sugar. But my main meals are okay. I don't really drink, I don't smoke.

Sign up to a pilates class run by a physio therapist. Do it religiously for a year and see how that sorts stuff out. Could hardly walk when restarting squash in my 40s - did pilates and it properly sorted me out - not just me legs

And as others say - if you give it all up now you'll feel properly sh1te in your 50s

I truly feel your pain OP. 53, knee replacement, wrist fusions down the road, heart issues and an ongoing history of CFS/ME, but I keep pushing on (though not just now as I've got COVID 🙄).

I can't do any 'standard' exercise classes such as yoga, pilates, gym as the whole thing is just too much, not a chance of a club run on a bike. However, I have found a range of mobility and strengthening mobility exercises that work for me that I can do on an off throughout the day to pace them and they are very useful. Not that I'm able up for them.

After my first major CFS bout I managed to get some strength and fitness back (as in so I could get out and about), by doing a very abbreviated 'Body By Science ' routine, Google it. Basically one set of 8-10 slow rep weights of each of  deadlift, bent over row, bench press and should press, once a week, sometimes twice. I used my brother's garage gym set up . Currently (before this COVID) I was doing a little more than than with some isolation exercises on top, but still only one working set and twice a week at local low key gym, but before that just had a set of dumbbells at home.

Running has been out of the question for years with my knees and walking takes it toll, so my main aerobic exercise is my bike. Recently converted my hard tail to an ebike to be able to keep my heart rate down and make that more manageable. But my riding is road, old rail routes and estate tracks both for heart rate and my wrists. Generally to a cafe too 😄

I was also doing sea swimming for quite a while, but where we live now is not the best for that. It was good exercise, getting out, and the other cold water benefits as well as seeing other people.

It's a constant battle pacing my driven head, versus what my body can handle and I keep a diary to try to help me balance things better, though I usually fail as I push myself far too much.

It does get very depressing. I sometimes end up in tears watching adventure type films and documentaries as there so much I'll never be able to do, and it's endlessly exhausting trying to find the balance, but I'd not give up, just find a way to do the things you enjoy at a new level.

Too difficult for me. I couldn’t even manage to get into some of the starting positions, never mind doing the actual stretches.

If that's true, it can't come as a massive surprise to find that you're not blissfully injury free then, surely? I mean you've got to put in the routine preventative maintenance as you get older, Sleep, Food, Hydration, Physical and mental health, restrict your alcohol intake; all those sorts of things. You've got to take positive steps to reinforce good habits and do them frequently.

It does get very depressing. I sometimes end up in tears watching adventure type films and documentaries as there so much I’ll never be able to do, and it’s endlessly exhausting trying to find the balance, but I’d not give up, just find a way to do the things you enjoy at a new level.

+1 @longdog this is what has hit me after what is a really relatively minor injury sustained in early Sept on the bike--basically just overdoing it and getting a muscular injury of some sort--seen a physio, been given some stretching exercises, I have been back out on the bike but short rides of 10-20 miles, and nervous about overdoing it...

but these past months have been worse for the mental impacts of the injury as much as the physical impact, I really want to be fit enough for the summer to get out for longer off-road rides and a few multi-day trips, I keep telling myself go easy and build up, over the winter, with warmer and longer days on the bike the motivation.

I bet alot of your niggles are all related.
No warm ups before rigorous exercise
No cool down and stretching after rigorous exercise
No daily core strength / stretching regime.
Too much time sat down, with potential bad posture.
Thing is , it's all do able . Put aside 20 mins daily and a few mins pre and post match and I would fully expect improvement over time

I too am making a connection between your poor attention to flexibility, core strength, warm up, and your attitude around expecting to 'just do it'. (etc)

Maybe looking at it as “exercise” is part of the problem? Don’t exercise any more. Just “go out” instead. Easy bike rides. / walks / golf / swim whatever. Look at it as just the activity for enjoyments sake (and thus better mental health). Do whatever doesn’t give you an injury and have fun.

Is what i came to say... just go riding for the hell of going riding 🙂 Nice and gentle, cruising round... easy.

I've also had a recent run of things hurting/aching/no longer working which was starting to get me down.  I stopped running in the middle of the year, but for the 12 months leading up to that I had only been trotting along rather than running as things were aching.  Then about 8 weeks ago I started getting a severe knee pain when biking - goes without saying that biking is a big thing for me, so to give that up would take a lot, but I had started to consider it.

The doc referred me to a physio for the knee, they've given me a few exercises, but I'm no overly optimistic that they're going to fix things.  I'd also started doing stretches and exercises from videos online but wasn't convinced I was doing them properly.

2 weeks ago I found a local pilates class and have now been to 2 sessions.  After the 1st I was feeling much much better - it seemed to loosen a lot of muscles that I didn't even realise were tense/tight, it also worked a lot of muscles that had been neglected for a long time.  One happy side effect is that the shoulder I knackered when I broke my neck 8 years ago is now feeling the best it has in all that time, and that wasn't even something I'd considered trying to fix 🙂

As I say, I'm only 2 weeks in, but I'll def keep it up as it seems to be helping.

I recommend the world's most popular exercise; Going for a walk. Ideally with a dog. Walking is the best form of exercise and greatly helped me when I was off the bike with COVID for two years. You don't need goals, other than time spent moving. You don't need kit (decent shoes excepted), you don't need a shower. You just walk. Strava is optional, but I record mine on my watch for no reason!

Cycling is not load bearing if setup is correct. It is cardiovascular. Running is the exercise one used to do before injury, too much load. Just. Walk.

If you have had back pain for longer than 3 months, then your body could be over sensitive to pain. I have been in this situation and my GP referred me to a pain clinic where I had therapy which greatly improved what I could do.

https://www.tamethebeast.org/

I also bought this:

https://www.noigroup.com/product/explain-pain-second-edition/

Sounds illogical but it really helped. Pm if you want to chat.

I can sympathise, i definitely take 3 steps forward and 2 steps backwards.

20 year old me was serving in the army, playing rugby professionally and able to run a marathon but also hold my own in any gym.

48 year old me, has broken over 20 bones, metal pins in shoulder and jaw, reconstructed knee, and after a particularly  rough period of COVID a few years ago, i am now Type 2 diabetic.

BUT i enjoy exercise, it is my social life cycling or hiking with friends, but i also enjoy the hours on the turbo and weight training in the garage, as i feel better for it, and it is easy to track progress.

My motto is "training hard to be thoroughly mediocre"!

You have to look at this way, you admit eating far too much sugar, and having all these aches and pains, and this is with trying to exercise and look after yourself, think what it will be like if you do nothing but surf the sofa?

I would:

- Have that doctors appointment and make sure there is no significant underlying health condition

- Slowly come back to exercise, and try to avoid any sort of impact, so running/ football etc, start with non-impact cardio, gentle bike rides and walks, and body-weight only strength training/ yoga. Just build up gradually.

I can sympathise with the yoga, i am as flexible as a house-brick and when i first started the sessions on Wahoo SYSTM with the lovely Abby, at first i found it harder than lifting heavy weights as i was using muscles i had not for a long time, but now find i quite relaxing..

Ebike, one of the lightweight orbeas or the new Whtye, or even a lower power levo SL. Not all the weight associated with the full fats. Takes the strain off your knees when pedalling and still gets you out and about.

Your shooting leg pains sound like a form of sciatica, especially given you had/have a back injury. Not a doctor/physio, etc, but sounds very similar to issues I had a few years back as a result of a big off that resulted in dislocated shoulder and some shoulder/arm fractures. The sciatica got to the point that i could only walk a few hundred metres without having to stop and stretch the pain away. Riding seemed to be OK, but as I did quite fancy being able to walk round the shops without being crippled by pain, I started out by going to see a chiropracter (who's also a doctor of physiology - I'm aware of the 'chiropracters are quacks' thing) who identified a lot of weirdness - big imbalance to my left hand side in terms of posture and other things. She recomended doing pilates, as it's seemingly more beginner friedly than yoga. That helped lots and got into the habit of doing a few basic things like a couple of roll downs and hip flexes every morning - easy enough to even do in the shower. Then just pushed myself to get out and walk - the gradual increase in mobility and strength eventually fixed stuff. Was also taking a vitamin B complex to aid with nerve regeneration. The walking has now turned to hiking, and do a few multi day moutnain trips every year. Also - for walking/hiking - use poles - it really helps to distribute load around your body more and really aids to mitigate jarring when descending. Post that shoulder injury, I don't ride anything like as much, or as high consequence - but hike a reasonable amount and weirdly started playing rugby again (I'm 44) for a Vets side. That's come with regular pulls & strains, but I've approached each one in the same way - strengthen the area affected gradually (i use free weights and resistance bands mostly) and lots of stretching - the stretching is almost automatic now. I've somehow managed to get into the county vets side, play most weeks for my club and genuinely feel the strongest (as in power) I've ever felt. It's very different to the bike 'strength' I had in my twenties and early thirties - but Im still content with how I perform on the bike, and the different direction in other activities has been really refreshing. Keep working at it gently - it will get better.

Thanks for all the replies. I really do appreciate it.

Regarding walking, that's very accessible. I have an eager spaniel waiting to go at any time. However, these recent niggles mean that walking hasn't been easy. It took me about 20 minutes to walk 500m last night. Thankfully it was dark and only the dog was giving me weird looks!

Bad posture for sure. My on the road sales job is more office based than ever. I do try to move as much as possible during the day.

On the yoga side of it, I can’t. I’m not supple. I have really really poor flexibility.

It's been said loads already, but if you have poor flexibility you must fix that first.
I used to run a lot as a bendy flexible teen (county level steeplechase and cross country/middle distance) and even back then at least 30-45 minutes of every training session was range of motion and flexibility work. Which was pretty amazing, as in every other area the coach was stuck in the 1960s.

 I have an eager spaniel waiting to go at any time

All the medicine you need (mine is confined to the cage of shame after his walk as I type. And some decent walking shoes (and socks too). Just take it easy for a while. I found it incredibly frustrating doing nothing but walking, but it will improve. Zone 1 and at a push 2, eventually about 40 km/week. Stick the Garmin on the dog for Strava 😀

It took me about 20 minutes to walk 500m last night.

I've got a back spasm currently that meant that a week or so ago, it took me about 5 mins to walk from my bathroom to the bedroom, and at one point I held the door frame and yelped/cried because of the pain. I'm worried about the amount of Neurofen Plus I'm taking and all the comfy things in my hose have become devices of exquisite torture. But; I'm doing my yoga, I've binned off running for the duration, I just go for walks - It takes a bit to loosen up but at the end on a few Kms I can be pain free for a couple of hours and Z2 on the bike has become my favourite* thing

*Not really

Get a grip lad!!! I share your frustrations, but nothing is final!

You cannot recover from an injury and then go back straight into sport again. Do what you've always done, you get what you've always got. There needs to be a period of consistent and disciplined 'prehab' which should become just like brushing your teeth....ie it's just what you now do twice a day. See if you can find a real PT and / or physio who will work with you properly. Like most things in life, not all PT's / physios are created equal, find the best one you can. I doubt a GP will be able to offer you any real help on this matter unless you're looking for a scan or private referral to a sports physio / specialist. 

Try and find a proper Pilates class in your area, where the instructor knows all about sport and sport rehab (a good physio practice will / should have plenty of contacts). Don't bother watching YouTube videos, you'll need subtle adjustments from the instructor and they'll be able to give workarounds as not exacerbate your existing injuries. You'll be amazed where 6 months of Pilates will get you - then you can start building the machine again! 

https://tommorrison.uk/products/the-simplistic-mobility-method?gad_source=1&gclid=Cj0KCQiA6vaqBhCbARIsACF9M6kGu-NKCzwAjIYmwD_BxZOfXjKFpoPZ4tNRsqmu68pAQLnKjciNCBwaAkM7EALw_wcB

This chap might be able to help. Keep meaning to give his stuff a go.

I Feel your pain, I spent 8 months of the end 22 & start 2023 off the bike due to an elbow injury (impact from bike crash). Took a long time to get fit and safe again on the bike, managed a weekend in the lakes end of may but to only go and fully rupture my patella tendon playing football the Monday after 😒😂 trying to get fitter. Knee surgery was in June and I have only just driven a car for first time yesterday its shocking injury. Id take the advise above to knock football on the head, not worth it and I like you I loved it. I'm hopeful of riding again next spring but if not I'll get out in the hills walking. I was also a non stretcher/ cool down etc so that is another lesson learned for future.

On the yoga stuff don't try and do it all at once.  I'm not supple either and got incredibly frustrated that I couldn't do even a 10 minute routine so I just didn't.  I just did a couple of minutes if the easier stuff and then that expands as I got more flexible.   It's pretty much impossible to make up for years of poor flexibility in only a few weeks without causing damage.  

I'm you in 10 years. All I can say is ... please don't give up. As many others have said above, strength and conditioning will help. What worked for me (after many different attempts) was one to one Pilates with a very good sports physio. She worked out what I could do with my various injuries and what I couldn't. The result was I stopped going through the boom and bust of injuries that I'd previously been through on almost a monthly basis.

I now "manage" my various issues and rarely have a major bust up with my body. As my strength and flexibility improved through the very defined stretching and exercise programme she gave me, I found that walking a reasonable distance every day (roughly an hour) really helped with extending the period between problems. Unfortunately, I then broke a metatarsal that refuses to heal, so that isn't quite working at the moment (and I'm really feeling the lack).

If you're sitting a lot of the day then sciatica type problems are gonna come knocking

If you have knee pain then do a piriformis release. Loads of vids on you tube. Went from excruciating pain walking to complete pain free.

As tired says, just walk.then walk more.

As above. Give up running and football. I use to run up to marathons. Got into my 50s and running was giving me knee problems. So I chucked it.

Now in my early 60s I'm swimming, Hill walking, and cycling. I won't get any places on strava but enjoyed a month long bike tour this autumn.

No need to set any records. My pre tour training involved mostly 15-25 miles rides with a pub at the halfway point. Not timed.

I'm in the yoga camp as well.  I'm older and you, and while I like running, cycling, climbing, if I don't look after myself  , meaning core and flexibility exercises, I pretty rapidly start falling apart.  It's also very satisfying to have the feeling your overall conditioning is improving.

I do a mixture of classes, and youtube, and I try to be pretty regular.  I understand you're not good now - well neither was I , and that's all the more reason 

/\ Pilates to gain flexibility and core strength

i've been going 2-3 times a week for 3 months, each class is with a different teacher and they all work very very differently, but they all give/show basic, intermediate, advanced levels. Worth seeing what is available and give it a go for a  few weeks, it'll make a big difference on the bike too..

ps. i had a director in my first proper job say "fat and unfit at 30, then you'll have a tough second half of your life"

I'd add to the recommendation for Pilates rather than yoga. It's quite gentle but focusses of using the right posture and technique to target particular muscles. It's been good for my back.

As another non-impact sport, have you tried open canoe, on lakes not whitewater? It would help if you can afford a lightweight canoe so that you're not overloading yourself lifting it on land.

"I am really struggling with getting older. I feel like everything I used to do is slipping away with nothing left."

You're only 41 FFS!

"THe best time to plant a fruit tree was 20 years ago. The next best time is Now!"

I too am making a connection between your poor attention to flexibility, core strength, warm up, and your attitude around expecting to ‘just do it’. (etc)

+1

+1 to what everyone's saying. You (generalisation) have to earn being able to 'run/ride/football' injury free. Just like the professional footballers, etc, have to. If you want to run 5 hours a week, you need to be doing 5 hours of S+C.

Pilates classes, as others suggest. And do the unsexy core exercises - PROPERLY - like dead bugs, etc. Swinging oneself up into situps etc (basic/bad core exercises) will do more damage than good. Stability - from strength - is what's needed. Stability is difficult and frustrating (you'll be pissed off at yourself that you can't even get the basic exercises right, to begin with) and needs constant maintenance.

I’m ‘only’ 41. But I didn’t think keeping fit would be this difficult and stressful.

You need to get comfortable with your own skin and what body you have. You need to accept that your body isnt capable of doing what you want it to do (right now), and stop looking what other people are doing, and what people claim to do on here.

I've got knackered hips, on my way to replacement. I used to be a keen runner and cyclist. I was gutted when I could only jog 2 miles, I now cant run at all. I can just about bike but thats no more than twice a week.

Stop playing football and ease off the running. When you have had 6 months of no niggles maybe re-introduce.

Echo what others have said

I have to say, I'm not sure that "tough love" is the best approach here?

Try and find someone offering advanced remedial massage. My experience is they can help identify possible causes and start to offer targeted exercises and advice for the treatment. Once you get some things to target, misaligned pelvis for me, then you can try to focus on that. 

Googling and trying out stuff and expecting it to work isn't going to work by the sounds of it. You can and will do more damage just doing yoga because the internet said it's going to fix it.

Or ask your GP about some pain management help as mental toughness can be just as important to stop thinking that every twitch is something to worry about.

Do not pack in the exercise or you will be ****ed. Maybe drop running and football if constantly injured. Broke my spine, badly, aged 46. 54 in a few weeks, and I have to keep active otherwise I may as well give up.  Always on the go, that keeps the muscles strong around the missing vertebrae.

Currently nursing a random knee strain, but anti-inflamatories and still cycle commuting is working.

Have you tried an e-bike? I know a lot of riders with chronic injuries who have managed to stay active and positive by switching to e-MTBs. An e-bike allows you to get out and enjoy the countryside, and with the assist they are much kinder to your knees especially uphill. You still need to be careful about setting up your riding position as an e-bike won't help if you get shoulder/neck pains - and you do have to be careful not to get over-excited, as climbing on an e-MTB gives you even more opportunity to head downhill with all the risks that entails.

This strikes a chord with me. Am feeling much the same. I injured a knee at the end of 2021, ended up having a knee op and rehab in 2022, then succumbed to an ankle operation three months ago. Feels like best part of two years that I have been unable to go full tilt (and even before then because the ankle was a degenerative condition.... which now feels worse than ever even three months post surgery).

At times, I feel like chucking in the towel. I can't do what I used to. At least not at the moment. Completing a race or triathlon seems a million miles off. Walking without pain would be nice at this point in time!

So I am concentrating on what I can do. I find swimming boring, but I can get down to the pool and swim a km before work. I can do a bit on Zwift, I can lift some weights in the gym. and I do modified yoga. There's loads on YouTube that helps me do 30 mins and work around the injury. I've never been that flexible either, but the yoga helps massively. It doesn't just happen... it is a process (a slow one in my case!)

For me, doing something is better than doing nothing though. It may not be racing...it is bridleway pootles at most right now...but it all helps keep me positive - and I think that is a big part of the healing process.

Good luck.... i know how frustrating it is.

I’m not sure that “tough love” is the best approach here

I'm not seeing anything here as tough love. Tough love would be telling me it is over and to wind my neck in playing football at 41.

I will research more on the pilates side of things. I will need to be very careful though.

I'm not getting an e-bike. If I'm determined for anything, it's to stay away from assisted riding for as long as I can.

You need to get comfortable with your own skin and what body you have

Well nothing will change that. I've given myself a hard time for all of my adult life and my self asteem and self worth will never change. Believe me, I've tried. I'm sure someone will tell me I haven't tried hard enough.

As above, not getting an e-bike. Despite injuries I still did two consecutive days of over 8 hours each day riding off road (excluding breaks) in the summer.  I'm not as fit as I was post accident, but there aren't many folk my age doing the stuff I do, excluding the injuries. I'm seen as a bit mad at work. I ride with similar mad people though, and we see it as 'normal' to us.

I’m not getting an e-bike. If I’m determined for anything, it’s to stay away from assisted riding for as long as I can.

They are heaps of fun though, and TBH impossible to ride without making motorbike noises*, which if you ask me, is all the excuse any man needs

* this is the same Billy Connelly argument that states: Any man if left alone in a room with a tea cosy who doesn't put it on his head is untrustworthy

@stcolin

I’m not seeing anything here as tough love.

Ok, I'm glad to hear that.

 I’ve given myself a hard time for all of my adult life and my self asteem and self worth will never change.

I can't say for certain without having seen you in person, but it is likely that this is at least part of the cause of your pain.

"On the yoga side of it, I can’t. I’m not supple. I have really really poor flexibility."

I'm sure others have said this but this is 100% the root of your problems. I'd have said the same about myself 10-15 years ago. I'm certainly not super flexible person now but it became obvious that as I got older (I'm just a few years older than you) I'd need to work on both strength and flexibility if I didn't want to be broken by the challenges of an active life (especially riding - and crashing - mountain bikes!)

When you get older you can't act like you could as a 20something  - there's a reason 99% of pro sports people are retired by their 40s! The ones with long careers for their sport are usually the ones that looked after themselves in the right way.

It’s been said already but footy is a terrible exercise for a middle-aged injury prone person. Running is risky enough, but should be manageable if you are sensible about it. Which may be the difficult bit based on what you’ve written.

If you think you can’t ride a bike at age 41 then you either have some serious chronic diseases or you’re being silly.

"I will research more on the pilates side of things. I will need to be very careful though."

Find a good teacher/class, be it yoga or pilates. Or a movement/flexibility oriented PT.

"I’m not getting an e-bike. If I’m determined for anything, it’s to stay away from assisted riding for as long as I can."

I've found that swapping between an ebike and a singlespeed hardtail is the perfect combination for me. The good thing about riding an ebike hard downhill is it makes you work harder head to toe, especially on tight twisty trails. And the singlespeed demands sustained high power uphill. And the ebike stops you doing that half-hearted riding, it's either chilling or full speed ahead. And the singlespeed tells me if I've let my endurance/power drop because I have to get off and push when I normally wouldn't, etc.

All the medicine you need (mine is confined to the cage of shame after his walk as I type. And some decent walking shoes (and socks too). Just take it easy for a while. I found it incredibly frustrating doing nothing but walking, but it will improve. Zone 1 and at a push 2, eventually about 40 km/week. Stick the Garmin on the dog for Strava

100% this. Love the Garmin on the dog idea, my lurcher will nail the KOMs.

Finally a subject I know a lot about. If it wasn't for injuries and rehab what would we talk about in the pub?

Part of it is expectations: 41 is the outer edge of youth when you still think you can do what you always did, and many can get away with this but not everyone. I remember having cartilage issues in my early/mid 30s in one ankle, high expectations of what I ought to be able to do made it worse I think - I'd push against rather than work round constraints. In fact that's what got me back on the bike after a few years of not having one (shitty pub one donated by a friend which became my London commuter) which was brilliant. I remember after getting results of athroscopy being told by the Aussie doc to stop running "yeah but what would you say to me if I was a £5m footballer (it was a long time ago)? "Your career is over!!!"

Actually as you get properly older your expectations moderate. I never got back to running properly - pounding along a road is just hard - but did enough to place top 5 v50s in a couple of triathlons, just taking things steady and learning when to push on or back off. Though my main things are all outdoor stuff rather than team sport, where I guess it's going to be hard to dial it down a bit in a controlled way?

I guess I'm saying that things might look very different in 10 years time, especially if you focus now on the right foundational stuff be it flexbility and posture, strength with a focus on core and the supporting muscles before hoiking big weights about, aerobic stuff with a focus initially at least on just running the motor and enjoying that.

'though I have to say

I am really struggling with getting older. I feel like everything I used to do is slipping away with nothing left.

Ageing is hard and gets harder as you go, and is certainly not for the weak. I sadly do not have other options to recommend.

When I had been having knee problems I saw 3 different physios. All 3 thought it was something different, and all 3 put me through different exercises. One thought it was tendonitis, one thought a meniscus tear, and the other wasn't sure but leant towards it coming from my back. Decided to get a scan, and there it was. A bruised femur at the knee, and a distinct lack of Cartlidge on the inside of my left knee. I was pretty shocked. Was told to stop running and football. So, I rested up, kept at some of the exercises and off I went. About 6 months into it I had been suffering with my knee locking (not in the traditional knee lock sense). I couldn't even take the dog for a walk. I could manage gentle cycling on the flat. Went to another physio recommended by a couple of people. He tells me that being told I couldn't play football or run was nonsense really. I also know of a few runners who have arthritis and have been knocking out marathons every year. Anyway, I go to this new guy and go through more exercises. Knee slowly improves. End up at GP, bloods taken, nothing to worry about. He then sends me to someone else. I had 4 sessions with him and things improved even more and I seemed to be making improvements with my hammies. I had 2 exercises geared towards these that I'd not done before. Started jogging very lightly, nothing more than 5k. I went back to 5 aside, took it super easy, and this was grand for a few weeks. Proper warm ups and cool downs. Then, last week, everything seems to let go. Back square one. I'm walking like John Wayne today.

So yea, that all adds to the frustration. All the different opinions and directions given. Go figure.

I'm under no illusions that I'm not 20 anymore.

Pack in the football.