I think my car has autonomous emergency braking but I’m not game to actually test it to see if it really does.
I have experienced this feature 'working' once in a Volvo XC60 (I think it was some kind of pedestrian safety device). I was on a roundabout and a coach started to pull on to the roundabout as I was going around it. The car 'sensed' a pedestrian and slammed the brakes on which almost resulted in the bloody coach driving into the side of my car - the driver was furious and I simply had no idea WTF had just happened!
A lion, in a side car, on a wall of death. I can’t decide if it is a bloody stupid idea or one of the best things that has ever happened in the history of the world.
I'd heard a story that the wall of death eventually got condemned, as it scared the lion so much it kept peeing itself, and the lion pee rotted the wood..............
And they look manky with greasy fingerprints.
Get an anti-glare screen protector. Not only does it mean that I never have to stare at my own horrific reflection but it doesn't pick up fingerprints.
I think my car has autonomous emergency braking but I’m not game to actually test it to see if it really does.
The sales tactic for my first V60 involved the salesman daring me to run him over with it. While I relished the opportunity the car did indeed stop me. Next time I spoke to him he told me that Volvo UK had forbidden this particular sales tactic following a couple of accidents where someone had turned the system off.
Next time I spoke to him he told me that Volvo UK had forbidden this particular sales tactic following a couple of accidents where someone had turned the system off.
Gravel bikes – like road bikes but slower, like mountain bikes but less capable. We live in the UK, we do not have endless miles of graded gravel like they do in the US.
Out I dunno, did the Saxon Way the week before last, 100 miles of mostly byways and tame bridleways that they were perfect tool for.
Then went up to the Yorskhire Dales, even more actual "gravel". Raydale where I was staying has 6 routes out of it. 2 are roads into Wensleydale, the other 4* are pretty much exactly what you'd imagine when someone says "gravel road". Infact most of the valleys round there the gravel roads outnumbered the paved ones it was great fun.
*half of which are the only routes out of the valley in those directions, so your road bike wouldn't be any use.
67.37% of roads in the US are paved. So nearly 33% are roads not paved.
(Roads, paved (% of total roads) in United States was reported at 67.37 % in 2008, according to the World Bank collection of development indicators, compiled from officially recognized sources)
In the UK I would be surprised if the % was even double figures. Sure, there are some farm tracks and old routes like the Ridgeway etc, but those are a rutty, muddy mess for a lot of the year. Not quite the gravel roads you see in the marketing when looking at gravel bikes.
80...no 90% of the human race!
Kettles in hotel rooms that are too big to get under the wash basin tap. Am I supposed to fill them using the shower head?
In the UK I would be surprised if the % was even double figures. Sure, there are some farm tracks and old routes like the Ridgeway etc, but those are a rutty, muddy mess for a lot of the year. Not quite the gravel roads you see in the marketing when looking at gravel bikes.
Yorkshire begs to differ, miles, and miles, and miles (and thousands of feet of climbing to go with it) of the stuff.
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Anyway, back in the thread.
Hydrogen fuel.
It costs ~£12/kg to create hydrogen via electrolysis.
It costs about £1.50/kg to make it on a refinery from methane.
So it's unlikely economically to come from a green source.
Then you have to transport it in highly specialised and low volume tankers.
Then it costs millions to build a filling station for it.
So in the end you've got a car that cost roughly double fill up (about 10kg/£120) for 600 miles than the equivalent petrol (about £60 at 50mpg) at UK prices, with zero tax on it.
Maybe when we finally get "electricity too cheap to meter" that's been promised by nuclear for 50 years, and is still probably 50 years away it'll make sense. But on a technological progress scale 50 years ago coil ignition was just replacing magnetos.
Brushed stainless steel fridges.
Fingerprint nightmare. Clean, and clean and clean and open the door and clean some more.
Well, the lion seems to be enjoying itself!
You'll probably find the lion is chained to the car. Or it would've eaten the driver first time out.
Things that initially solve a minor 'problem', but then cause a much bigger one when they go wrong.
1) Modern powered handbrakes on cars.
2) House boilers with automatic ignition that cannot be lit by hand when they go wrong.
But the crowning turd in the water pipe for me is/was eject buttons on remote controls for entertainment devices that have physical media for storage. Why have an eject button for a DVD player on a remote when you have to be 'at' the machine to swap the disc?
Changing the bulbs on modern cars is near impossible.
My old polo was a breeze, reach inside take out dead bulb, replace with new.
I said Brexit but worthy of a second vote.
Much like Brexit itself, eh, what?
Alloy wheels
Metallic paint
Incredibly wide cars with massive doors
Cars with a boot instead of a hatch back
White/beige sofas and car interiors
Cheap bearings in factory built bikes
Product packaging that is both unrecyclable and excessive
How buildings are designed, tendered and built
Watching the England football team play
Sharing a bed and room with your partner
Changing the bulbs on modern cars is near impossible.
Doesn't need to be that modern.
I once got a phone call from a colleague, in Halford's car park, going "will you come help, I've bought a headlight bulb and I cannot work out how to fit it." After I'd done calling him a chump I drove over and I couldn't work it out either. We both drove back to work and I looked it up. "Step 1: remove radiator."
Nothing exotic, this was an Astra van and at least 15 years ago.
Kettles in hotel rooms that are too big to get under the wash basin tap. Am I supposed to fill them using the shower head?
I agree but two answers
1/ use the cup you're about to put the boiled water into - that way you'll also boil the right amount.
2/ Never use the hotel kettle, everyone knows that people piss in them for a laugh.
But the crowning turd in the water pipe for me is/was eject buttons on remote controls for entertainment devices that have physical media for storage. Why have an eject button for a DVD player on a remote when you have to be ‘at’ the machine to swap the disc?
Because my wife insists on controlling the remotes but muggins has to get up and change the DVD. I wouldn't dare touch the controls!
Product packaging that is both unrecyclable and excessive
My planer/thicknesser arrived on a pallet with an entire roll of bubble wrap(about 25m),wrapped around it. I very carefully unwound it all back into a big roll and used it over the next 2 years packaging things from ebay sales. 😀
Shame they took the pallet back with them 🙁
On electric handbrakes, when was the last time any of you moaners had a cable pull? New caliper,
every.
****ing.
year.
Both cars.
Hateful things and I can't wait to see the back of them. I'd rather have hill assist some of the time than none of the time.
On electric handbrakes, when was the last time any of you moaners had a cable pull? New caliper,
every.
****.
year.
Only ever had cable handbrakes except on hire cares. Never had to replace a caliper due to an issue with the handbrake mechanism.
Replaced front calipers a few times over the years, only ever replaced one rear that I remember.
Friends with electric handbrakes have had to replace rear calipers as the handbrake part of it failed though so it looks like it's not as clear cut as all that.
Agree with a lot of packaging in general, esp in supermarkets. Why do some checkout workers insist on trying to put already packaged things in extra plastic bags? Stop it.
Car park ticket machines that only take coins. Really DCC? Why not join the 21st century and allow card or phone payments?
Headlights on modern cars that consistently blind oncoming traffic. Self adjusting my arse.
I saw my arse with electronic handbrakes the day mine decided to refuse to disengage. Whilst I was second from the front of a queue of cars lined up to disembark a ferry. The only other time I've heard that many car horns is downtown Chicago at rush hour.
Car park ticket machines that only take coins.
I appreciate they're all competing companies but, I really wish someone would have a monopoly on "pay by phone" apps. Another city, another app, my phone is full of the bloody things.
Adverts splattered all over forums and websites, especially those newer ones that blur out what you want to read until you hit close.
I've been using the internet regularly since around '97 and don't recall ever clicking through any advert to purchase something.
2FA which uses txt messaging and doesn't allow to use a 2FA app, especially if the timeout doesn't give you time to walk out the house to the top of the garden to get reception.
Doesn’t need to be that modern.
I once got a phone call from a colleague, in Halford’s car park, going “will you come help, I’ve bought a headlight bulb and I cannot work out how to fit it.” After I’d done calling him a chump I drove over and I couldn’t work it out either. We both drove back to work and I looked it up. “Step 1: remove radiator.”
Nothing exotic, this was an Astra van and at least 15 years ago.
Wheel, wheel arch cover, sump cover, battery, battery box and the hands of a gibbon to finish the job here.
The design engineers who allowed this to get through need to be compelled to be on call to come fit the bulbs, in the rain, for the remaining useful life of the car. Then, when the car is back on the road said engineers should be fitted with an electrical rectal probe which triggers every time a car they designed squeaks or rattles after being disassembled to fit a consumable.
Wow. That's... certainly something.
Benoit the Berlingo is 16 years old, weirdly one headlight is really simple. The other is the mirror image, but the air intake and wiring loom (a big thick 40mm bundle of wires, not just the bulb) run about half an inch behind it.
You can get the screw cap off the bulb, but only if you have 3 hands the size of a small child but with the finger strength of a rock climbing jazz pianist.
Being French and apparently being the wiring for the whole engine I'm expecting damage to that bit of loom will kill the car for want of a h4 bulb at some point.
the press the screen for contactless payment. So every single person touches exactly the same areas.
@nickc I'm fine with what contactless payment means it's more the fact you can make a whole shopping process without the need for the handling of good by multiple people (I also understand about Packers and stackers) the there's a point that you take the contact from dozens to hundreds just because you all have to touch the same area of a screen when the till could be programmed to activate the card reader and money receiver automatically then close the one that's not being used down.
Voting when the choice is rubbish (or worse than rubbish), voting when its not fair, voting when no one sticks to their promises, voting for liars, cheats and criminals, voting when idiots can also vote thereby undermining your intelligent vote 🙂
Agreed on headlight bulbs and handbrakes. Bought my much longed for T6 earlier this year - handbrake is cable which is good, but upgrading the woeful headlight bulbs was like keyhole heart surgery!!
Car park ticket machines that only take coins. Really DCC? Why not join the 21st century and allow card or phone payments?
This. Our seafront car park has two ticket machines, one working, neither accept card or have an app. And you don't find this out until you go to leave. The other ticket machines in town take contactless but, oh, only cards, NFC on your phone doesn't work.
Only ever had cable handbrakes except on hire cares. Never had to replace a caliper due to an issue with the handbrake mechanism.
I must be really unlucky then, three cars in a row. Do you live inland maybe? Not particularly cold? Wondering if salt is to blame.
Benoit the Berlingo is 16 years old, weirdly one headlight is really simple. The other is the mirror image, but the air intake and wiring loom (a big thick 40mm bundle of wires, not just the bulb) run about half an inch behind it.
Similar on my car, one is relatively easy. The other one I wouldn't consider trying myself, it's a garage job!
Being French and apparently being the wiring for the whole engine I’m expecting damage to that bit of loom will kill the car for want of a h4 bulb at some point.
The last time I saw something like that, and I cannot for the life of me remember what it was but might have been a Peugeot (so there's a common denominator here) the entire headlamp assembly came out of the body forwards.
the press the screen for contactless payment. So every single person touches exactly the same areas.
High contact areas like that and I try to press them in non-obvious places like the corner of the button rather than the middle, and I use a knuckle on my non-dominant hand. Same with things like door handles.
Also I carry a pocket bottle of hand gel which I'll use immediately afterwards. Remember back when this all started and hand sanitiser was as rare as unicorn semen and priced like printer ink, supermarket shelves were stripped bare and you'd more chance of finding toilet roll? What happened to it all, has anyone ever seen anyone actually using their own stuff? I haven't. It's been in Tesco's "reduced to clear" section for months.
There you go, there's another bloody stupid idea. People.
The last time I saw something like that, and I cannot for the life of me remember what it was but might have been a Peugeot (so there’s a common denominator here) the entire headlamp assembly came out of the body forwards.
My previous Ford did that, you undid 2 torx screws (conveniently with big slots in them so you could do them with any screwdriver/blade/metal rim of the spare bulb if not at home) and pressed two tabs in (which then snapped off, saving a step for future goes) and the whole assembly popped out.
Why can't other cars copy that?
Golf
Many elements of VW design.
Fast cars.
My previous Ford did that,
Yup, the Mondeo is so easy to change a bulb on. The C8, on the other hand, is like a task from Saw that will leave you with a cramped and bloody wrist. The headlight is removable but only if you take the bumper off first.
Car park ticket machines that only take coins. Really DCC? Why not join the 21st century and allow card or phone payments?
Because WiFi and Internet don't seem to reach quite big chunks of DCCs area.....
Paint on cars.
Mine is covered in minor scratches and dings, which are a massive pain to fix and so not worth doing.
I'd like the body panels made out of a some kind of durable polymer. Like that Citroen Cactus SUV, but all over.
Having to press print multiple times on a networked printer system - the times I have walked over the way to find nothing have come through...
I had to change a HID bulb on my BMW this morning. There's a hatch in the wheel well liner that can be opened with the wheel on full lock, although wheel off would be far easier, and then a weatherproof cover over the bulb to twist off, then the bulb itself. Never done it before, but took about 10 minutes from start to finish and I had to do it twice, once to remove the old bulb to see which type it was, then refit and drive to Halfords to buy the replacement, then again and fit the new bulb. Wasn't too bad. Halfords wanted £40-45 to fit it.
IIRC, the Rover 75 was bumper off to change the headlight bulbs...
I stopped worrying about the paint on my car when the door to the gas meter blew open and put a 4 inch scratch down to the metal in the bonnet.
Wooden prosthetics used to love my old whalebone stump !
Bloody greeenpeace !
Aaaargh , Aaaargh !
Did you just crash with a piratey error?
Volvo was great for changing bulbs. Open bonnet, pull out a locking pin (with your hands, no special tool) then the entire headlight assembly slides forwards out of the car so you can open it and change the bulb. The bmw has the hatch in the wheels arch as above, not looking forward to having to change that!
Have we done number plates for bikes yet? Sorry, haven’t read the whole thread... but some lawyer was on the Today program this week advocating that (and I remember not cropping up a few months ago on here).
Because WiFi and Internet don’t seem to reach quite big chunks of DCCs area…..
If by "Wifi and Internet" you mean mobile data connection - then the ones I've bothered to check (whilst waiting for friends to scrape together or otherwise obtain enough change) had relatively good 4g.
And I'd suggest that VERY few would be somewhere you couldn't get standard phone signal to allow you to use one of the "call this number to pay" systems.🙂
^that. Constables.
My vote goes to touch screens in cars. Impossible to operate without taking your eyes off the road for (too) long periods. Prone to misfire when your finger is jolted off target. And they look manky with greasy fingerprints.
As someone who’s job involves driving around pretty much every example of modern production cars and commercials, I agree with all my heart! The use of mobile phones is banned, for obvious reasons, but equally annoying and distracting touch-screens are being introduced in more and more cars!
And I also agree with comments about electronic parking/handbrakes - bloody horrible things, and again so many cars have them fitted.
These are two things that were deciders when I bought my new car; there are others, I like the way it looks, and drives, the driving position suits me perfectly as it’s a crossover, it has a heated screen, satnav, CarPlay, etc, but it has actual knobs for the radio and aircon, and a fairly large infotainment screen which is a touchscreen but needs minimal touching, and it has an actual handbrake. It also has an electronic hill hold capability, as it’s got a semi-auto ‘box, and that works really well, but it’s no substitute for a proper handbrake.
I could compile a pretty extensive list of all the things that increasingly annoy me about modern cars, but honestly, life is too short, and it’ll just make me cross!
it has an actual handbrake. It also has an electronic hill hold capability, as it’s got a semi-auto ‘box,
I'm sold. What is it?
Changing the bulbs on modern cars is near impossible.
My old polo was a breeze, reach inside take out dead bulb, replace with new.
My Puma took 45 minutes to replace a bulb, it required a large Torx wrench, which I had to source from a specialist tool supplier, the removal of four Torx bolts, the radiator grill, a couple of drain tubes, the entire headlight unit, and the back of the unit to get at the bulb. Then reverse the process. That procedure was listed under ‘roadside repairs’ in the handbook! Yeah, in the dark, in pissing rain or snow…
Oh, how I laughed when I had to change a sidelight bulb…
My Octavia took approximately five minutes.
I’m sold. What is it?
Ford EcoSport, ST-Line model. It also has a sideways opening hatch, which does polarise opinion, but I happen to like it - I’ve lost track of the number of times I’ve smacked my head on the lock on a regular hatch, when it’s not opened to its full extent.
Great motor as well, the 1.0 Ecoboost engine is really nippy, mine is the 125Hp version, it can be tweaked up to 170, but that’s the limit of the turbo - chucking a chunk of money at it will get just over 200hp, from a 998cc three-cylinder!
Mine;
Covid vaccinations !
Oh, I like that.
The Ecoboost engines are just insane.
Covid vaccinations !
Ah, it's twenty to 12, just about right for "home from pub chucking out time."
Electric opening tailgates on cars. Having spent a few weeks with cars with this feature at various times at no point have I thought ‘wow, this is so much better than lifting it or closing by hand’ usually I think, why is it so f@%##ing slow and annoying
Pretty good feature IMHO. Mine also has a release button below the steering wheel and by the time you press this, get out of the car and walk to the rear the boot is open.
apologies if already said (not read the whole thread) the tories.
Oh yes, I was wondering whether to rant about wooden worktops or Belfast sinks, and picked the worktop.
Belatedly coming to this, I don't get it. I've had Belfast sinks for nearly 10 years now and the only problem I've had was when I wore a Ti ring and scuffed up the sink. Came out fairly easily with some barman's friend cleaning powder stuff. Other than that, never had a problem.
Enamel sinks now, there's something I can't deal with. Have to remove it and take it to a specialist to get it reenameled, and the in-place solutions are shonky. Bleurgh.
And I agree entirely on wodden countertops
My Puma took 45 minutes to replace a bulb, it required a large Torx wrench, which I had to source from a specialist tool supplier, the removal of four Torx bolts, the radiator grill, a couple of drain tubes, the entire headlight unit, and the back of the unit to get at the bulb. Then reverse the process.
You were doing it wrong then - I changed mine in the car park at work with an assortment of bodge tools I found around the building. It wasn't easy, but it certainly was a particularly demanding job and didn't take me 45 minutes.
The Amazon Prime PIN code entry screen on my TV App.
Impossible to enter the PIN without anyone who can see the screen from reading the number.
Numbers are hashed out but you have to use a number pad to enter them, and each selection is highlighted in orange - pointless.
On that,
Virgin's parental controls.
"This content is 12+, if you're viewing it then you'll have to enter your PIN."
Enter the only PIN I'd likely ever have set.
"Sorry, that's wrong."
Enter their default code 1234
"Sorry, that's wrong. A third incorrect entry will lock out your account."
Well, shit. I just wanted to watch TV for an hour before I go to bed, instead I'm going to have to spend an hour ****ing about with a TV remote before going to bed.
I have never to my knowledge set a PIN code. I don't want a PIN code. I've reset it now after deploying a degree of language that is also age-inappropriate but not protected by a PIN. The youngest person in this house is 22, swears more than I do (which is a feat in itself) and is theoretically leaving in a week. I neither need nor want this functionality. But nowhere, anywhere on this system, on the app or on the TV box or online or anywhere else can I find an 'off' option.
Smart Motorways.
How that ever got off the proposal stage is beyond me.
OBVIOUSLY that's a moronic idea.
I had to change a HID bulb on my BMW this morning. There’s a hatch in the wheel well liner that can be opened with the wheel on full lock, although wheel off would be far easier, and then a weatherproof cover over the bulb to twist off, then the bulb itself. Never done it before, but took about 10 minutes from start to finish and I had to do it twice, once to remove the old bulb to see which type it was, then refit and drive to Halfords to buy the replacement, then again and fit the new bulb. Wasn’t too bad. Halfords wanted £40-45 to fit it.
Really? I always get Halfords to change mine, you lose a few man points, but every time it's the same "Do you want this fitted for £5?" why yes I do, then a nice chap with a box full of tools and I suppose at least some training and experience will spend 30-45 mins swearing at my car until they're in. I'd pay that all day long.
Some of the best third-placed teams getting into the knockout stages of a big football competition thereby taking away all of the excitement of the final group matches for supporters of those teams.
FFS
Virgin’s parental controls.
I only use my Virgin box as a PVR (it only has free to air channels on it). Pretty much the only thing I record is F1. For some reason it wants me to enter a PIN to watch F1 if I watch it before 9pm even though C4 highlights show is generally shown live at 7pm ish
Really? I always get Halfords to change mine, you lose a few man points, but every time it’s the same “Do you want this fitted for £5?” why yes I do, then a nice chap with a box full of tools and I suppose at least some training and experience will spend 30-45 mins swearing at my car until they’re in. I’d pay that all day long.
I worked in Halfords as a student. I wouldnt let them touch either my bike or my car. You get some genuinely knowledgeable staff, but the majority don't have a clue.
I always get Halfords to change mine, you lose a few man points, but every time it’s the same “Do you want this fitted for £5?”
Except that Halfords have a list of cars they won't replace headlamp bulbs on. Which includes almost all the cars where it would be worth getting someone else to do it. So if they are prepared to take your fiver, you know that you should have done it yourself.
Holding the final of the World Test Championships in England in June.
Day 5 and so far we've had 160 overs total, that's just over 5 sessions worth. We've lost 8 sessions to rain and bad light, and even with a spare day to make up time, unless the Captains contrive a declaration chase this looks like a draw.
Inventing a game to be played in an atlantic archipelago that has to stop for rain.
Smart Motorways.
How that ever got off the proposal stage is beyond me.
OBVIOUSLY that’s a moronic idea.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p09kxjnc
08:00 - 12:30
Nothing is ever that simple.
Needless complexity.
Phones that are glued together and not screwed. Makes changing the screen or battery a proper chore.
Can we go back to worktops. I see it all the time in American YouTube videos but have also seen it in the UK occasionally.
Who in their right mind would tile a kitchen or bathroom worktop?!
That's gonsta be hella nasty in short order.
Phones that are glued together and not screwed. Makes changing the screen or battery a proper chore.
Disagree. Makes them very water resistant and is easy to open with a spring metal spudger. IPA and playing cards are your friends once you can slot a card in just dribble IPA into the slot give it a second and slide the card, repeat.
Shops that close at midday on a Saturday. Especially useful when you have to find some new safety boots for Monday.
I always get Halfords to change mine, you lose a few man points, but every time it’s the same “Do you want this fitted for £5?”
Except that Halfords have a list of cars they won’t replace headlamp bulbs on. Which includes almost all the cars where it would be worth getting someone else to do it. So if they are prepared to take your fiver, you know that you should have done it yourself.
I worked there back when they introduced this service and the amount of fun we used to have due to the 'Do Not Fit' list being near-useless was immense. One that sticks in the mind was a customer agreed to having the headlight bulb being fitted and went off to B&Q while it was done. They came back 20 mins later to find the whole front of their car disassembled across the car park, bumper, grille, foglights, wheel liners, the works. One of the Saturday boys had thought it was a good idea to go back in store and grab the Haynes manual for that car (think it was a Laguna, could be wrong though as it was 20 years ago!) and started following it. To his credit he did get the bulb fitted and the car back together fine but the sight of looking out of the office window to see a load of bits scattered round the car park was amusing!
The Amazon Prime PIN code entry screen on my TV App.
Impossible to enter the PIN without anyone who can see the screen from reading the number.
Numbers are hashed out but you have to use a number pad to enter them, and each selection is highlighted in orange – pointless.
It's single use and only valid for a few minutes.
