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People who overtake you when you're indicating to turn right.
Happened twice to me this week - once on the bike and once in the car. Arses.
Who would you assign a place to?
Yes. 100x yes.
It happened last week, and she was stupid enough when I didn't yield for her to give me a huge blare on the horn.
She then drove up to the back of a queue of traffic 30 yards further up the road, which gave me the chance to spin round in the road and ride back to question her choices. Very politely, of course. Her response was that as I was in danger of being squashed then I should take more care to stay out of her way. When I queried whether she'd seen the recent highway code changes she would up her window and refused to answer.
People who talk in theatres.
The Devil. Apparently she has a well appointed villa.
People who overtake you when you’re indicating to turn right.
Happened twice to me this week
At the old house where parking involved either a U-turn just past a traffic island or similar at the other end around a mini-roundabout, it was likely every other day for several years.
That and reverse parking. Indicate left, shimmy left through the parking spot as I pass, stop and slam it into reverse as fast as humanely possible, and some country and western will still drive right up my chuff and then start waving their hands about rather than just reverse two metres and wait five seconds for me to get out of their way.
People who overtake you when you have stopped to let a car advance towards you when there is only room for one car.
You then have to watch a complete prick reverse back to where you have stopped.
People who send you looooooong tedious whatsapp or messenger messages - because they don't like typing. But they are more than happy with you finding somewhere where you can listen to a message rather than quickly reading it and then, without seemingly having worked out what they were going to say before they started, ramble on for 5 minutes (across multiple messages) which you are meant to find the time to listen to.
If you want to actually talk.....ring me up.....muppets.
I've had an on coming car overtake me up the inside when turning right, they "had to" get past the other cyclist coming towards me. The junction was on a corner too so she could see if there was other traffic either.
Sticking to the overtake theme...
People who overtake you when you're turning left with no thought for what they might not have seen emerging from the junction you're turning into. Almost always at speed limit +50% and often without checking what's coming the other way.
People who overtake you at double the speed limit by crossing double white lines through a cross roads at a known accident spot in a 30mph limit.
Yes **** in a silver Caddy earlier this week I'm thinking of you....
Wasn't super impressed by the 90mph overtake by the little Seat 10 minutes later when I was doing a solid 60 in an NSL but illegality aside it was least executed on an arrow straight bit of road with limited other hazards and indicators.
To be honest though these people don't need a special place in hell they need effective roads policing and some attitude adjustment with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick. I may of course be condemned to hell myself and out of pure self interest I'd rather not share my afterlife with these twits.
People who constantly sniff a runny nose on public transport.
I once sat beside a guy, Glasgow to Edinburgh train, who sniffed approximately every 15 seconds for the 48 minute journey. I could have murdered the ****.
And yes, I did offer him a disposable hankie, but he declined.
Thank the lord I discovered my phone could download music and had a headphone jack.
People with a bang and crackle map on their 1 litre shitebox car.
One day I'll snap and there'll be a murdurrrr😠
People who leave their dogs shit on the pavement.
95% of people. Annoying bastards tbh.
People who overtake you when you have stopped to let a car advance towards you when there is only room for one car.
You then have to watch a complete prick reverse back to where you have stopped.
Round here they just keep going and it's usually the oncoming car that needs to reverse unless there's a handy pavement to drive along.
People who talk in theatres.
And child molestors.
People who have no idea how slip roads work.
You don't slow down half a mile before the cut off, or gently accelerate and try and merge into 70mph traffic doing 40mph, any speed decrease/increase should be done on the slip road.
The amount of near misses I've witnessed due to these drivers beggars belief. Not as annoying as middle lane hoggers, but way more dangerous.
The inventor of the corned beef tin and its lethal key
...you?
Ex wives/partners.
Arsehole bosses.
Shitty neighbours.
Most of the British population.
nigel farage.
boris johnson and his odious father.
And child molestors.
I'm so very glad that didn't go to waste. Thank you.
Hell is other people
People who are too stupid to have their house name or number visible from the street.
Cause of muchly daily swearing in my job.
Also architects who design new builds with utility meters buried indoors in a shitty cramped wee cupboard under the stairs instead of outside cabinets. ****ers.
People who overtake you when you have stopped to let a car advance towards you when there is only room for one car.
You then have to watch a complete prick reverse back to where you have stopped.
Oh yes
People who's tyre logos don't line up with their valves
The follow through ers.
There is a TNT lorry on your side of tge road.
There is enough gap to let maybe 1 or 2 through before i arrive at said TNT lorry.
But no. The car in in position 3 and 4 and occasionaly 5th in the queue all blindly follow.
They can't see if there is any oncoming traffic. It must be clear as the car in front has gone. Hes thinking the same thing. Dullard.
I jusr drive at them now.
Only cross the central line if you are absolutely certain that the car on the correct side of the road has seen you and is willing and able to either stop or move into the gutter to give you enough room to safely complete the move. Whether the car on tge correct side of the road should stop debatable. I say no, but on occasions its worth it for traffic flow. Broken down horse box with some pretty blonde thing blocking g the road. 2 cars my side, 100 the other. I would stop and let a tranche through.
People who can't keep to a consistent speed on a dual carriageway or Motorway, particularly those whose cars MUST have cruise control fitted.
Either fast downhill and then slow back up or those that instantly speed up as you pass by as they've noticed they're now doing 58mph. 😤
Drivers overtaking you on a 90 degree bend - you get special loud voice abuse. Unless you've got a high performance car, there is no way you an go round that corner as qick as I can on a road bike - I've yet to see a motorbike keep up in 35 years of riding round these bends.
Broken down horse box with some pretty blonde thing blocking g the road. 2 cars my side, 100 the other. I would stop and let a tranche through.
Yes, but you can almost guarantee that the ****-knuckle behind you would get annoyed and then overtake you into the traffic you are letting through.
People who park at a petrol pump to buy snacks.
People who enter a roundabout at daft speeds, then get angry if a slower vehicle gets in their way.
40mph everywhere brigade
Random Brakes on empty road
Accelerates whilst being overtaken
Overtakes then brakes
I could go on.
Me.
Given that I doubt most of these people will end up in hell it seems like the ideal place to get away from them all.
I imagine hell would run out of special places once you cram in anyone involved in with Cameron announcing that non-binding referendum and what has happened since in the UK. 😉
People in inside lane at a roadworks queue who drift over half way into next lane to deliberatly block people who are trying to make more efficient use of the space.
People who can’t keep to a consistent speed on a dual carriageway or Motorway, particularly those whose cars MUST have cruise control fitted.
Either fast downhill and then slow back up or those that instantly speed up as you pass by as they’ve noticed they’re now doing 58mph
Cruise control is a pain if it’s busy unless everyone’s using it. On a busy m/way you’re forever fiddling about with the buttons to adjust your speed & braking anyway. Just need learn to keep their foot in the same place on the go pedal & watch the speedo.
There’s a place in hell especially for politicians. It’s packed with them from all parties.
Hypocrites, definitely hypocrites (and boy aren't there a lot of them around at the moment)
People who cut you up on a roundabout because they chose the wrong lane.
People who insist on shooting pass on a roundabout and then cut you up just to get one car in front. Had some prick do this to me Friday.
People who cut you up on a roundabout because they chose the wrong lane.
People who cut you up on a roundabout because they chose both lanes. I'll happily straight-line them all day, but if not there's some bugger else already in the other lane.
The local estate agent who sent us a flyer that starts with "Wanting to sell your house?"
People that ride past 2 men at work signs and a trail closed sign and when you ask please can you walk past the bit of trail I'm currently repairing reply no I'm alright. It wasnt a request you *******.
Yes I've been trail building today, most people were great but a few......maybe next time we will just close the whole trail.
30+ year old chipboard flooring
Drivers at traffic lights when light turns green, stop chatting to their passenger, take ages to engage gear, release handbrake and pull away slowly and us behind either have to wait another 5 mins or jump the red light. Usually retired folk possibly some from here as there seems to be a good few early retirees on cracking pensions. Only jokin don't take offence
Oil company executives, motor company executives, airline executives, car obsessed highways planners, and whoever invented the jetski. Oh, and the Tory leadership.
People who piss all over the seats in public toilets, including kids - scruffy oiks. Parents who don’t teach their kids not to be scruffy oiks.
Crikey, there’s some anger out there, I suppose it’s better than winding each other up on a serious thread. Have a beer all of you and reflect!
People who’s tyre logos don’t line up with their valves
People who don't understand apostrophes.
Are they the Apostrophes that administrate the Special Place in Hell?
Crikey, there’s some anger out there, I suppose it’s better than winding each other up on a serious thread. Have a beer all of you and reflect!
Actually, add 'people who tell me to calm down and think about my actions' when my anger is entirely justified... 😉
@iamtheresurrection - have you reflected then? And are you one of the Apostrophes’?
I'm reflecting now, with alcohol as an emotional crutch.
I don't comment on grammar and spelling these days as without reading glasses, I can only hope I'm not making many mistakes...
The **** who overtook a cyclist and a runner on a blind uphill today and almost drove in to us. I gave him the classic ****er hand gesture and he slammed on the brakes which caused him to skid. I think he thought, because we were in a Fiat 500L, that I was an old chap and would be intimidated. He drove off when he got a closer look. Absolute selfish prick of a human being.
The set of dickheads all walking dogs off lead at Tittesworth Reservoir despite the dozens of signs asking them not to do so.
@iamtheresurrection Pleased my advice helped! Have a good evening, enjoy the beer/wine/spirit. Tomorrow is another day..
People who constantly sniff a runny nose on public transport.
And yes, I did offer him a disposable hankie, but he declined.
He wasn’t Japanese, was he? Seriously, it’s a cultural thing to sniff, and very definitely not seemly to use a tissue or hanky to blow your nose. As I have a cold at the moment, and going through tissues like they’re going out of fashion, keeping on sniffing would drive me nuts. 🤧
Cruise control is a pain if it’s busy unless everyone’s using it.
Even then it’s a pain, because unless all cars have adaptive cruise control, the speed of each car will vary slightly, as I frequently found on trips past Birmingham on the way to Manchester, through a 14-mile 50mph camera-controlled section of the motorway. Jeez, that was ******* tedious! 🥱😴
Outdoor bloggers who have their backs to the sun, whilst recording themselves.
The smug Tesla driving bell end who earlier today parked next to a pump at a busy petrol station and then proceeded to do 'very' leisurely grocery shop.
Just middle laners. Utter ****ers. Makes the world a much slower more polluted place. Pull the **** over.
Fiat 500L designers.
The 500 is a cool car, iconic even. And the modern version is a fabulous reboot of it. But it's a compromise, they're not big and they're not supposed to be. Making it into a four door enlarged mini-MPV ..... call it something else if you want but it's not a 500 any more.
It'd be like the Beatles reforming, but as a five piece because they didn't have a synth player in the original.
Fiat 500L designers.
Are you the guy from earlier today? 😀
Decent car to be given for free by your in laws though and handy for a small family too.
It’d be like the Beatles reforming, but as a five piece because they didn’t have a synth player in the original.
Lennon, Mccartney and Harrison all played synth. 🙂
It's a very decent car. I don't have a problem with the car, or the drivers.
It's not a 500 though; the 500 is not a mini-MPV and the designers / marketeers need to get in the sea.
Fiat 500 drivers - all variants
People that say they HATE -->> STW,have a big flounce,then come back with a new user name,the same attitude, and whine on in exactly same manner.
People who have intense jealousy over other happy family. Then they go all the way out to break them and succeed. The happy loving family falls apart. Hell fire is too good for these jealous people.
Sham celebrities.
You are crippling the next generation.
Go and burn slowly in a special place.
The lump of who knows what the size of a baked bean that I've finally managed to fire into a tissue at the tail end of a two-day sinus headache.
Thanks, body. Love you too.
The pricks on motorbikes riding all over and wrecking Hemlock MTB trails yesterday. They are official MTB trails and the trail association work hard to keep them in good nick.
People who commute on road bikes with full team kit who think that means they automatically know more about how to ride a bike safely than someone in jeans and a jumper hauling a trailer with two kids.
I've been doing this since before you were born, prick, so keep your ****ing opinions to yourself.
And yes, even if you are coming off a roundabout at 25mph you still have to be ready to stop at pedestrian crossings.
The inventor of the corned beef tin and its lethal key
Yes, but then I wouldn't have been found crying with laughter at my 18 year old daughter's attempts to open a tin of CB a few weeks ago. She got the can opener out, I shook my head and pointed to the key. She looked at the key and asked if she needed a hammer as well.. I let it drag on for a while while the guessing became even more ridiculous. 😀
4 lap Arena Games Super Sprint races at Crit City, typically 50-100 riders, all in one category.🤮🥵😵
Retired people who clog up shops at the weekend.
Retired people who clog up shops at the weekend.
And clog up the roads during commuting time. FFS
Anyone with a political interest. All news journalists, anyone who even mildly disagrees with me and those dimwits who when approaching from the left at the top of a T junction who flash you out when turning right to save doing the corner properly.
People who sit in their cars with the engine running while eating their lunch.
Rent-a-gobs who've been pulled from obscurity after a lifetime's mediocrity and are given air time thanks to their edgy and usually ill-informed views. Thus far we've had Lowri Turner exhumed to discuss extinction rebellion, Right Said Fred objecting to epidemiologists etc. That awful Durham student woman can get in the sea too.
People who record videos in portrait.
People who record videos in portrait.
LOL! That's true.
People with a bang and crackle map on their [s]1 litre shitebox [/s] car.
People who put their poorly secured recycling out the night before even though the forecast is very windy. Their stuff gets blown all over the place but they're too important to pick up their own litter afterwards 'cos they think the Wombles will do it for them. The rest of the street then has their plastic crap flying around for a day or two.
Parents who drive cars the size of Belgium and park them at jaunty angles blocking the road near the school but they live 5 mins walk away and it would be quicker to walk there. There's no wonder you and little Oliver and Savannah are obese. It's not your hormones it's because you're lazy idiots.
Guess who lives on a windy hill 100m from a school?
Whoever made the decision to use shrink wrap on sets of brake pads. When that stuff does its biz around the pad spring it can take longer to get it out of the packaging and clean than it does to fit the pads.
People who drop litter.
And a slightly hotter corner for those who actually make money out of fly tipping.
Priti Patel - although she probably already has a second job as a non-exec director of hell - and takes advantage of its offshore status for tax purposes.
Disposable barbecues. And coal.
Manchester City Council and British Cycling for building a cycle track around our local park, ruining all the quiet bits and building some lovely features in an SBI.
Class act I don't object to building infostructure but some level of environmental sensitivity would be nice.
Loving some of the pettiness here, great work.
I'd like to nominate people who sit in their car with the engine running, especially outside a school (there are always a few) and even more especially when it's perfectly pleasant outside anyway.
People who record videos in portrait.
Have you not used a smartphone?
Harley Davidson riders - we rode to the nice cafe in Feizor a couple of summers ago and some prick decided that he needed to warm his engine up (on a baking hot day) before departing.
The result was 5 mins of needless loud noise destroying the peace and quiet and the stench of unburnt fuel ruining the taste of the food. When an old lady told him he was ruining their lunch he got shirty, so I went over and had a not-very-quiet-nor-polite word with him