The film of my life...
 

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[Closed] The film of my life...

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... appears to be being written by someone who couldn't get a writing job on Ally McBeal again, and I'm increasingly concerned that I'm being played by McKenzie Crook. I found myself leaning on the doorframe of someone's office and saying "hey" in a sympathetic manner this morning.

I urgently need better writers please, a really good costume with leather bits and epaulettes, Chris Ryan to choreograph the major fight scenes, a new female lead and some 3D stuff with giant reptiles. And I want to be played by Matt Damon again.

We're not going for critical acclaim and stupid, poncey remarks about it having beautiful cinematography here, we're going for more excitement, more explosions, more reptiles, more flesh, more gunfights and some massive helicopters.

Now. Dammit. 👿


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:19 pm
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Is your favourite fantasy 'two lesbians probably... sisters... you're just watching'?


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:23 pm
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Have you seen "Stranger Than Fiction"?


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:23 pm
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 MSP
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I have just written a gay porn scene for you, big bubba will be along in a moment, he will be your co star.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:25 pm
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IanMunro - Member
Is your favourite fantasy 'two lesbians probably... sisters... you're just watching'?

Just watching??? You're sick.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:25 pm
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Moments of my life could have been written by Jan Svanmeyer...

... and others, by the scriptwriters for Shameless! 😐


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:26 pm
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life is like a p0rno. It takes too long to get to the good bit and before you know it you're a dribbling mess.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:27 pm
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Bring out the gimp.......


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:27 pm
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Thanks MSP. I'd like to hold on to a 15 certificate for this though, so there'll need to be a pot-plant in the way for the fisting.

Then can we get onto the helicopters attacking the giant reptiles' breeding ground?

Ta


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:28 pm
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howsabout a cameo role in.....

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:28 pm
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Anyone watched 'Happiness'?


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:39 pm
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Will it involve a roll of damp-proof membrane BD? if so, can I be an extra? 🙂


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:43 pm
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[i]Anyone watched 'Happiness'?
[/i]

[url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happiness_(1998_film) ]"In his review of the film, Roger Ebert wrote, "...the depraved are only seeking what we all seek, but with a lack of ordinary moral vision...In a film that looks into the abyss of human despair, there is the horrifying suggestion that these characters may not be grotesque exceptions, but may in fact be part of the mainstream of humanity.""[/url]

No. Nor am I going to. Have you watched Mega-Shark vs Giant Octopus?

[img] [/img]

Imagine this, only with far, far more aliens dressed as air hostesses.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:45 pm
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I too would like giant reptiles, helecopters and lesbians but I would also like a scene where Ray Winstone decapatates Phil Collins with a shovel.

[img] [/img]

+

[img] [/img]

+

[img] [/img]

Whilst being taunted at by Frank Sidebottom and a Fiona Bruce.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:54 pm
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I like your thinking Harry. 🙂


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:56 pm
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Why thank you.

Fiona would be covered in mud and/or beans BTW.


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 12:57 pm
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beans i think 8)


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 5:39 pm
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beans i think 8)


 
Posted : 20/04/2010 5:40 pm

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