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Dear daughter had been out with some mates so I (slightly overprotective dad) (mildly tipsy) offered to pick her up/walk her home.
Thought, I'll take the dog, mid walk, he drops the arse and assumes the position. I go in with one of the few remaining legal plastic bags on earth and.... nothing. I panic, wheres the turd? Am I going to be labled a bad dog owner, owner of foot fouling dog, where's the turd, I scrabble round in the grass like I've just dropped the last of my stash. I look at the dog, the dog gives no clue.
He's just ghosted me hasn't he? Or will I make the local Facebook spotted page for being a bad dog owner....
It's on the bottom of your shoe. Or it was until you walked back in the house. Now it's on the living room carpet and you are shortly to be in the dog house and the dog is having your dinner...
mines making pooping an artform.
couple of days ago he waded out into the sea until he was oxter deep, then stood there pooping and staring at me.
yesterday he waded out to an island in the river and pooped there. Again, staring at me the whole time.
A ghost poo today is a double poo tomorrow.
oh wait, did he eat it maybe?
oh wait, did he eat it maybe?
Well, he said he was a bit tipsy. I’ve probably eaten worse after a night on the sauce.
Our Grumpy Beddlington when on urban walks,likes to back up to walls, and make them stick if he can,that or through locked gates.I’m sure i can hear him chuckle, to himself🤨
mines making pooping an artform.
couple of days ago he waded out into the sea until he was oxter deep, then stood there pooping and staring at me.
yesterday he waded out to an island in the river and pooped there. Again, staring at me the whole time.
I read that dogs feel at their most vulnerable whilst pooping so look to their owners for reassurance.
Ours (whippets) just look incredibly odd as they draw all four legs parallel so wobble back and forth...
wheres the turd?
Probably still stuck halfway out his bum. He'll probably wipe it off on your best rug when you're not looking.
What's with this "poop" business? Did we all just suddenly move four thousand miles West?
I've been for a dump before and said turd has entered the water with the grace of an Olympic diver.
I have then found my arse doesn't need wiping and said turd has also navigated the u-bend so no need to flush either.
It's those kind of days I feel happy to be alive.
’ve been for a dump before and said turd has entered the water with the grace of an Olympic diver.
I have then found my arse doesn’t need wiping and said turd has also navigated the u-bend so no need to flush either.
Those kind of poo's are legendary and so gratifying when they happen, feel like Hi 5ing my ring piece.
When all you dog owners go to bed and they get their dog mates over for a beer and a chat they must be pissing themselves about how they get their human minders running around picking up their shit.
'Get this, get this, yesterday I hunkered down and did my best gurning face but I only pretended to curl one out. I had him on the floor searching around in the grass desperate to fondle my turd. How messed up is that! I cocked my leg down his leg whilst he was messing around and he still didn't notice the bellend. I'll shit in his mouth again tonight and wait till the woman gives him grief for having stinky breath.'
I'm glad I get to come on sometimes to stw and read this poo or will it vanish if I report it to a ghostly archive...
Those kind of poo’s are legendary and so gratifying when they happen, feel like Hi 5ing my ring piece.
Thanks. New keyboard needed. 😀