[Closed] The apprentice.

I quite like it for the the behavioural aspects of the people but the last one I didn't really enjoy.

old hat innit

I really can't watch this as I find that the "contestants" irritate my Dark Passenger. It's one of the few programmes that you would be hard pushed to parody as in itself it is utterly ridiculous.

Bring it on, love it. 🙂

It's one of the few programmes that you would be hard pushed to parody as in itself it is utterly ridiculous

It IS a parody. It's not a serious business challenge - how boring would that be to watch? It's a platform to make fun of people who love themselves far too much.

Yep, can't wait.
Cringeworthy, car-crash TV! Great for a game of bullshit bingo. 😉

Having heard the trailers for it on the radio I can't wait to see Mr "Effortless Superiority" working it out and wowing us, the humble and subservient public. 😀

I quite like it for [u]negative, counter productive, not how truly successful people work[/u] [s]the the[/s] behavioural aspects of the people but the last one I didn't really enjoy.

FIFY

I do enjoy it. The lack of self-awareness on display is absolutely breath-taking.

Everyone in the country thinks they are a bunch of utter and complete ****s!!! And they seem hell bent on demonstrating this with their every word and action. Yet they seem to have convinced themselves that the total opposite is in fact true. Incredible!

Can you imagine ending up working with one of them as your boss? 😯

Can you imagine ending up working with one of them as your boss?

I shudder to think.

[i]Everyone in the country thinks they are a bunch of utter and complete *s![/i]

I try my best to avoid utter and complete *s... so why the fudge would I want to watch them on TV? I don't get it at all.

So you can stare in total disbelief at the weapons-grade bell-endery on display. Its truly staggering!!!

So you can stare in total disbelief at the weapons-grade bell-endery on display. Its truly staggering!!!

^^ This. 🙂

It is great car crash TV and enjoyable to watch. I love the ironical introductions about "some of Britain's top young entrepreneurs" when everyone watching knows exactly why they have been chosen!!! When will someone have the balls to say to Shir Allan, you know mate the best way to make some dosh is to buy a load of property and ride the boom. Much better than computers and phones no one wants.

Will the court case dampen down his eye for candy?

Never watched it tbh

Reality tv seems to me to be the modern equivalent of the circus freak show where we get to stare point and laugh at folk ..it cheapens us all

Wrings hands and feels sad 😉

Thats a good point JY and there is an element of exploitation/freak show about them esp BB. Perhaps the only mitigating factor is the fact that they happily and willingly volunteer. Do they not realise that there are easier ways to have self delusion bubbles popped?!?

On the self delusion/aggrandisement point, it's funny how Shir A feels te need to have his chair raised so that he is the tallest on that side of the [s]TV studio[/s], sorry boardroom table. Like Sarkozy's and Cowell's platform shoes! All a little sad.

It's also a bit sad to laugh at shortarses - especially very successful ones. Says a lot about the one laughing.

Anyway, wot JY says +1.

A lot of this stuff seems like laughing at the afflicted sometimes - though how "afflicted" the candidates on The Apprentice are is up for debate.

As an aside last night as I was flicking through the channels, it seems that reality TV's current favourite [s]victims[/s] subject is hoarders (I realise this is not news), apart from the fat, who will always provide good fodder. There were three different programmes featuring hoarders on various channels and I notice the BBC is starting a show on them this (?) week. Some of these people are clearly ill and I feel a little uncomfortable in gawping at them in the guise of them being helped.

weapons-grade bell-endery

brilliant... I will be using that phrase at every available opportunity!

The type of people who go on the Apprentice are there for one reason only. To announce their undisputed genius to an eagerly awaiting nation.

And the thing is that nothing, not even the total contempt and richly deserved derision of an entire country, will make the slightest dent on their monstrous, planet-sized ego's. They're all, without fail, utterly vile human beings, and deserve everything they get

Just having a look through the [url= http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p017h0j7/profiles/candidates ]The Candidates[/url], this quote stood out:

"I am a great of my generation. I'm an innovator and leader in business. I take inspiration from Napoleon; I am here to conquer!"

Anybody who can let a statement like that pass their lips deserves to be mocked mercilessly for their utter ****ishness, wouldn't you say?

Morning Norman. Good miss on the "sad bit" bit, plus ca change. Funny does not have to mean "ha, ha" BTW!! Says a lot about folk looking for an argument when there isn't one.

The point is that it is sad that apparently successful people feel the need to compensate for their height when there is no reason. Just shows that money doesn't always buy you happiness or inner confidence.

Good reality TV teaches us about psychology.

Bad reality TV is pointing and laughing.

Bad reality TV is pointing and laughing.

Agreed. Bit sad to see it on forums too. Especially, long drawn out fairly boring posts.

I think you've got that the wrong way around Molly 😉

I find that the "contestants" irritate my Dark Passenger

sorry, your what?

Anybody who can let a statement like that pass their lips deserves to be mocked mercilessly for their utter ****ishness, wouldn't you say?

PS has Cove applied?

"I am a great of my generation. I'm an innovator and leader in business. I take inspiration from Napoleon; I am here to conquer!"

That's going on the C.V.

I don't watch The Apprentice because my television can't take having heavy objects thrown at it.

I don't watch The Apprentice because my television can't take having heavy objects thrown at it.

I just throw my Ugg Boots at it instead.

What reaction do you think you'd get if you told them they needed professional help then JY? A positive one?

They're not mentally ill FFS!! Unless you count terminal narcissism? They're just me-me-me, attention-seeking idiots, with egos the size of continental plates. There's a pretty big difference

labsey - another one for you:

"some people might come to this process with a game plan. I just feel my effortless superiority will take me all the way"

I think I'll be using that one in meetings from now on 😆

Calm down dear - do you need help 😉

Ha well I'm not so negative about the show, though yeah most of them are self obsessed and clueless about how they are perceived - but then so are many successful people so maybe that helps?!

James Max was a fine chap but I think they realized people like him are a bit dull for the show - far more fun to watch people trying to charge £10 to dry clean a pillow case or whatever.

brakes - Member
I find that the "contestants" irritate my Dark Passenger
sorry, your what?

[img] http://t0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSuyw9CA7ZbKasLMaHMsn4Li4vBkZO7zA_0i7WHW7oAp8_vBeew [/img]

Was a big fan from the start but the novelty has worn off, it is worth watching just for the interviews at the end though.

gave up on the last series.... two classic bits that stick in my mind.

this tw*t
[img] https://encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRnVCPu7nNJ9a31C7yOFP6LizNyQ1iayw-gksTg-mrOvZtgnytDYw [/img]

his interview was amazing, he reckons he had some licence for an ISP and the guy found out he didnt, so in the interview he grilled him and he lied beyond madness until he finally gave in and admitted it.

there was one task (i think in the same series) where they had to bake bread and rolls for top class london hotels, anyway one team totally cocked up and only made about 50 rolls not the 2000 that was ordered one apprentice had to go and tell the head chef why they only had 50 rolls.... you thought the guy was going to deck him!

Never watched it beyond 10 mins of one episode and 4 of another. I detest the fact that BBC money is spent on it.

It promotes an idea that "business" is everything
It suggests that if you act like a ****wit in work you can get ahead
SURALAN is a knobend
I would not employ anyone who ever applied for the Apprentice.

It's light entertainment, not business. And for those who spot the irony, it's pure comedy on top. I wish Margaret was still there, she played her part better than Brady.

A touch of eye candy this year as well.

A touch of eye candy this year as well.

Massively offset by the utter bollocks that they're speaking...

"I'm half machine!"
😯 🙄

Every time I tell myself I won't watch it but I still do. I hate them already.

[img] [/img]

I've tried to watch it again, failed after 30 seconds.

Oh jeez....this could be a slog. Hand hovering over the off switch!!

I can see me posting lots of facepalm pictures during this show...

I know this is a trivial and shallow observation .... but WTF is going on with that Welsh blokes eye brows??!!

Boyo with plucked eyebrows. WTF?

(Edit: Just clocked previous post)

Eyebrows for the win 😯

That Alex (Freddie Mercury) looks like an evil ventriloquists dummy.

Oh the bitching and self-promotion has started...

I liked leadershipness

What's up with that guy's face?

He looks like a bad waxwork crossed with a startled weasel.

jekkyl - Member

That Alex (Freddie Mercury) looks like an evil ventriloquists dummy.

😆 bwahhaahhaa.

i want to punch them all

He looks like the count off Sesame Street!

I think they should forsake London for the next series and film it all in Liverpool. Then we can have sweepstakes on who gets there head stoved in first!

I think this guy is more annoying than the Freddie Mercury lookalike:

[img] [/img]

Jumpy as hell, looks like he's sitting on a live electric wire.

Choice of characters and episode 1 pretty much to script.

Jaz had to go, her head was too big.

The twunt-o-meter has just exploded out of its housing.

I bet none of them rides a mountain bike.

Utter twunts...all of them.

This one:

[img] [/img]

Stalin in a frock.

Nasty, horrible person.
Delusions of adequacy, all the charm of an anal fissure.

Stalin was reticent by comparison. At least he knew when to shut up and let people hang themselves.

Admitted she has fake 'churns' and probably had a lobotomy too 😉

Oh, this one too:

[img] [/img]

Charmless knobster, bullied in school, still wets the bed and doesn't like cats.
Possible micro penis.

Begone, foul dwimmerlaik, lord of carrion!

I caught 10 seconds of it while waiting for the Sky box to come on. 3 utter ****ers in a car reminded me exactly why I avoid it.

Who won then.

project - Member

Who won then.

More like who cares who won then. Watch it for entertainment by all means, but please don't care, it feeds the attention whores.

I was about to ask "where are the huge cans?" but I see Rusty has posted them - for different reasons of course 😛

i see next week for contrast there is a programme called Skint-- all about duckin n divin on the rock n roll-- at least the characters will be human...

I caught a few minutes of it when i popped in to see my folks, my father (aged 64) was at the table having his tea after spending all day at a main UK-ireland gas pumping station contorted on his back into a teeny space whilst welding gas supply pipes - his response to the twunts on the program would get me banned after repeating a few words if the swear filter was switched off but i'll try and remember some of it, he ranted for quite a while so this is probably a very abridged version.

****ing ****s............ i'd like those preened ****ing poofs to spend one ****ing day at my job, i'd have them cowering in the ****ing corner dribbling piss and shite down their legs within 60 seconds of getting in the door, ****ing waste of sperm conceiving ****s like that i'd give my weekly wage to slap them up and down the ****ing workshop before handing them over to big al who'd rip their balls off and stuff them in their ****ing mouths...that's if they've got any ****ing balls.

That was pretty much his response and i tend to agree wi him - the program must be a piss-take surely?, i'd pay good money to see them attempt to work wi him or his crew - that'd make far better viewing.

Soma: could your dad cut it in an executive job?

[img] [/img]

My motto in life... is, umm, more or less stolen from John McClane in Die Hard.

I'm sure he could cut it in an executive job, he'd certainly speak out if anyone talked shite and he doesn't suffer fools or anyone who lies but i dunno how his boiler suit would fit in round the boardroom table. As the senior engineer of the gas turbine compressor station calls my father directly to plan work at the plant then i imagine he's well thought of, My mother got 4 mahoosive bunches of flowers from the MD at xmas (enough to fill 3 rooms with enough to give out to neighbours) to apologise for all the emergency callouts he attended last year so yeah - i'd like to see him in an executive job - whether or not he'd last a day before smacking skulls is a different matter entirely but i imagine anyone that was on the receiving end fully deserved it.

The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.

It's a wise child that knows it's own father.

Dont know if its the HD or are some of the female contestants a bit like drag queens ?

Yep, there's def something odd about all the females this year. I was trying to work out what one of them is made out of. I think it may be Bakerlight

One of them has Einsteins brain, which may be useful if you're trying to win the Noble prize for physics, less so for the apprentice.

LOL @ the stars in their eyes Freddie Mercury bloke.

my sisters take on this

'I hate women who think the only way to be taken seriously is to be total bitches and wear ridiculously high heals and the blokes well they usually social rejects who spent their school dinner hours selling sweets to their class mates at 50% mark up and thats what they base their success on'

I just think the characters are getting more like BB freaks, as pointed out already its entertainment and not serious business. Mitchell and Webb have it right in that sketch.