Team football for kids

Football’s accessible. He’ll play in a team and assuming they’re from a range of primary schools come secondary school he’ll have pre-established relationships. At some point when they hit puberty and start to development he may succeed or falter (plenty bail around 13), but it won’t matter because it will have served him well. No other team sport is so accessible.

I played rugby, didn’t like football for the reasons you highlight

If they like football, why not support it and check in with their experience of it as they grow

With all the dementia (chronic traumatic encephalopathy CTE) and concussion concerns, tag or touch rugby is better in every way… 95% of the fun as union contact rugby with 5% of the injury risk (statistics entirely made up)

Tag Rugby for under 7’s seems to be gaining momentum for participation

Perhaps look at football at this stage of their life as a way to be active, make friends and learn about playing in a team

It'll do him far more good than harm

BMX racing. My lad loves it and it seems to be getting more and more popular at the moment.

My son is 13 and been playing football since the age of about 9.

I hear the stereotype concerns about football, but I’ve never seen it to be fair.

Kids grassroots football these days is very well organised with codes of practice (behaviour) for coaches and parents. There are enough grassroots teams about in the country too that you can always move clubs locally.

Normally it will be 2 parents with an interest in football that will coach the team, so the only thing you will get is bias towards their own kids for team selection, but again this is rare

Our lad now plays at national level, academy football, county and national squad football. This  is organised very differently. In some ways still very professional, but the kids are treated as assets. However our lad loves it. He loves the hard work and competitiveness

Kids football is a world away from adult Sunday League football which is truly awful in terms of behaviour and standards. Hopefully as the kids game is now more inclusive (including girls) and poor behaviour isn’t accepted then this will trickle through and start to change the culture of adult football

My wife and I have never liked football and would have preferred Jnr FD to play any other sport from our perspective as we both never liked football, mainly due to the culture , but our son loves football and it would have been wrong for us to stop him experiencing it. Give your child opportunities and let them decide if it’s not for them

I can’t see why you wouldn’t let him play.

And just to add. In any sport you will get nasty coaches / parents. People are nieve if they don’t think that exists in all sports.

My lad played from 7-18, daughter is currently 14 playing at U16. They have both made tons of friends through football and the routine of regular training and matches a great.

I've been a welfare officer for a big club (80+ teams in the West Midlands), part of the role was dealing with complaints so I have seen the very worst of parental behaviour, but it's generally isolated idiots, very few and far between and normally (IME) managed within the group of parents who just want to see their kids play sport.

There will be local grassroots club, go and check them out...you'll be pleasantly surprised I think.

Competitive football starts at U7. Say goodbye to your weekend mornings and learn how to put nets up and in a few years, how to run the line 😂

Why not see if there is a Kixx or similar nearby? In my experience they are a very friendly environment

Yes, you should find a well run team as described by FunkyDunc and support him and the team. Parenting is about your kids experience not yours and while I understand your concerns, to deny him the chance of trying it would be wrong.

Even more so

Normally it will be 2 parents with an interest in football that will coach the team

who won't be being paid, probably have to buy their own team kit too, give up weekends and evenings for the benefit of all not just their kids, and whether it's overtly expressed or not will have a dozen other parents who think they could do it better.

DO - give them your wholehearted support - even if you don't become an active participant help them with all the shit that doesn't need coaching badges such as helping them to move goals and nets and cones and whatever else. And be a good supporter that helps them with the club's code of conduct so that other parents don't become the kind of parents you describe in your post.

DON'T - be the parent that treats it as a £5 creche for 2 hours on a Saturday morning so you and mrs morts can have a special cuddle while he's out of the way

Why not see if there is a Kixx or similar nearby? In my experience they are a very friendly environment

I would be more weary of this type of place as they are clearly a company , and a lot of these places although coaching well are selling the dream of getting your kid in to academy football

Look here  https://find.englandfootball.com/

He is 5 and shown an interest, why would you not let him try it, he may or may not like it. My kids tried all sorts of sport growing up, football, rugby, karate, swimming, gymnastics etc they even did mountain biking! Some they hated and packed in after a few weeks and others they stuck with. I am all for exposing children to as many sports/activities as possible growing up until they find what interests them.

I’m also not really sure why you wouldn’t let him play if he wants to?

Yes there are a few idiot coaches (and even more idiot sideline parents who think they know more than the coaches/referees/professional mangers) but if you find the right club your son will have a wonderful time.

i used to coach my daughters team and to do so took the basic FA coaching badges. It was great for the girls to have regular meet ups and the chance to develop in terms of both sporting ability and socially.

Dismissing a whole sport seems unfair especially if it is something your son wants to do. There are pros and cons with all sports (including bike riding!)

Let him try it.

At that age it will be 4x4 with no score. If nothing else it will give him kudos in the playground with his friends.

Both my boys played football - and many other sports - for various periods before they found their niche.

Thud came and went with football three times before finally "retiring". Still enjoys a kick-around with his friends at the local astro', so that's a result 🙂

So- be supportive and enjoy it (even the cold, rainy mornings in Cumbernauld).

Lots of great advice above. I coach an u10 team of 40 kids all from same school (but nothing to do with the school). They started in yr1 as a bunch of boys and girls with no clue, and 6 dad's and a mum who'd been coerced into it and only had a basic idea, but enthusiasm and willing to turn out all weathers. I started because I wanted my introvert son to do a team sport. He and I now love it.

We are mixed ability and gender. This year we have had to start selecting a competitive squad to remain competitive in the FA league but also always have a friendly against local rivals too. Great respect ethos in our league/area. A world apart from the nonsense of football hooligans and bigotry.

Only 1 incident in 5 years that needed an FA report when a y4 parent kicked off with the opposition ref about a tackle and got banned from attending again. All the other parents on both teams united against them.

is bias towards their own kids for team selection,

This amused me. Each squad of about 10 has to have a coach or 2 (if 1 refs) so obviously has to take their own kid as well...

I think I had similar concerns to the OP before my youngest started playing. This was mainly due to some of the horror stories I'd heard from my BIL, my nephew seemed to have been involved in some awful games against some shockingly behaved teams/parents.

Thankfully, I was proven wrong and now 5 years down the line he's still playing, cannot wait to get out of the door for training and game day and we (and he) have made some great friends in a great group of parents.

Echo everything said above about giving the coaches all your support, help whenever and wherever you can. Also do everything possible to foster a positive environment for the kids, we see teams where this is clearly not the case and it's sad to see. Let them play and enjoy it, no need to try and turn them into premier League players or coach them like adults.

Time to go - 10am kick off 😃

As someone mentioned, matches will start at under 7 but you should be able to find a local soccer school where they have coaches getting kids running around and doing some practises and matches.

Competitive matches don’t start until under 12, no scores or leagues are published until this age group and if your team are trailing by more than 4 goals you get to stick on another player. After each term you get moved around to make sure you are getting fair matches.

I started out with the same reservations and then when my son and a friend didn’t get picked for a team ended up running one with another Dad. I hadn’t watched a full match in probably 15 years. We were given all the kids who weren’t good enough for other teams. At 1 point we had to tell our keeper to stop playing with the mud!

Find a club which has Fa standard charter status. This means all the coaches have had to do FA level 1 which is 40+ hours of learning to coach kids. They teach you how to build practises and make them fun and game related. Massive focus on skills and development and not outcomes which I think is why now England have a crop of technically gifted young players. It massively changed my attitude to football in this country. You still have some people stuck in the past but that’s not what’s coming out from the clubs generally.

My son now has been playing for about 7 years and loves it and it’s something we have to talk about even as he starts entering the teenage years. I am having a break from coaching this year but am still helping as needed and even when he wants to disappear into phones Xbox etc I still get that time every Saturday morning with him where we have no other distractions.

I have tried getting him into things I enjoy but after years have realised you need to show interest in what they like.

Say goodbye to your weekend mornings

Also true of swimming, dancing, netball…

Parents behaving badly can happen anywhere, too (one of the other dads decided to argue with the umpire during a Hi-5 netball match) and as other have said, my neighbour used to coach kids football and said all the parents had to sign a code of conduct.

At 1 point we had to tell our keeper to stop playing with the mud!

Loving this. One of my players is a gymnast and she randomly cartwheels across the pitch at the most inappropriate moments. Her dad is one of my coaches 😂

I played in goal for 35 years, mainly because of the mud. I don't know how i'd have coped in these days of manicured lawns and 3G artificial turf, there'd be nothing to do when the ball's at the other end.

One of my players is a gymnast and she randomly cartwheels across the pitch at the most inappropriate moments

Not John Burridge's offspring by any chance. When he played for United I used to get there just so I could see the warmup.

I coach 2 teams, u11 and u14 and have done for 4 years.

First thing is, unless he’s very good he won’t be playing competitively until u7 so you have  a year or so of development. Find a local club that run development sessions, likely Saturday mornings, take him along and see what they are like. Emphasis should be entirely on having fun. They’ll coach the basics but should be very light on coaching heavy on enjoyment. If it’s not, find another club.

the vast majority of kids football is a great space. Yes you have parents and coaches who are dicks, but you’ll notice more than the kids. Our u11 team (who are a decent side) still come off asking what the score was, so don’t think they’re noticing the parent asking the ref for every decision, they’re not.

the better your kid is, the higher they’ll play and the more competitive it will become. The constant is the coaching, so make sure the coaches are there for the right reasons - kids development first, winning second. I have a charter for my u11s - respect, 100% effort and support your teammates first, and we play to win ( I don’t see wanting to win as a bad thing, as long as it’s approached in the right way).

it’s been a great journey for me and my kids. I was nervous about the negative sides of it, but I remember taking my oldest to cross races and watching dads with jet washers scream at their kids on 2k bikes to get an effing move on, week in week out. Football has been so much more positive than those experiences…

My son is 18 and has been playing with the same team since he was 4. I think there are about 5 of the original group still playing and it has been a huge success. His team mates came from a variety of local primary schools so it made the transition to secondary school seamless because he had an instant group of friends. He's quite shy so the team has been his social life and he's quite a good all round sportsman so its given him confidence to participate in other sports and an outlet to burn of all his excess energy. The coaches have been dads who have been fantastic at giving up their time in all weathers and encouraging the kids in a team environment. Yes you do get problem parents and problem teams and you might even have to move teams if the culture isn't what you want, we've been lucky in the fun and team culture come above outright winning. I've seen parents try to steer their children away from football but it really is the culture of the playground and local common so its denying them that opportunity when they really want it

My immediate reaction (wasn’t the best time to be asked) was no, not at all. I said there is a minority of small minded men in football who ruin it for the rest of us.

You sound like the small minded one OP.

My kids have both played grassroots football from about 6/7 and are now playing u14s/u11s and love it. As mentioned above numerous times, grassroots clubs are proper FA run entities these days where as a parent, you need to abide by the rules, as do the coaches etc. I'm an u14 coach and in all my years watching grassroots and now coaching, I've seen a tiny handful of incidents (2 in fact) where players (who can be little sh*ts - its a fact of life) or parents/supporters cross the line. Luckily neither incident has been my own team.

As for talk of not liking the football "culture", jesus christ... That culture is the national sport. Playing and watching football is bloody brilliant. There are tossers in football just as they are in biking, golf, rugby, doing a shop in your local Tesco, servicing your car, walking past you in the street...

My son played football until he was 10. Lots of tears because he was so competitive and got frustrated. I wasn't that sad when he gave up to concentrate on diving, which he loves. The standard of coaching was pretty old school and not that great. I had to step in once because the coach was ranting at my son at half time, I think he was about 8 at the time. Most of the parents were great but there was usually one who'd be ranting and raving. With the diving the coaches have been great, most have been divers and are getting paid which makes a huge difference. Unfortunately it's been more expensive than football, monthly fees, competitions all over the place. He loves it, competed at the Commonwealth Games, doing a sports science degree, is a coach now and wants to do that after University. It's been exhausting, and the over competitive, insecure parents still exist. They don't rant and rave from poolside but they will corner you and moan about why this kid is getting more opportunities than their kid etc etc.
It's my daughter that plays football now. She's 15 and been playing for about 5 years. She loves it, plays at regional level for Spartans in Edinburgh who are a pretty big community club. She has no interest in playing at academy level and just loves playing with her mates. I'm happy she's getting regular exercise and learning about team work etc. I have a good laugh with the parents as most of us don't take it too seriously, talking to the parents who's kids have moved up to the academy team and it seems much less enjoyable for everyone. I get a lot out of the time I get to spend with her going to and from training and matches, it gives us time to talk and we're closer as a result. So if you can find the right team and level for him it should be all good but worth trying a variety of sports at that age.

One other thing is now that my son has left home, going to a football match is a great excuse to get together, some of my best memories are of football matches we've gone to.

My kid used to play rugby and football from about 6 to 13 (when he made the sensible and successful switch to a proper sport (mountain biking) 😎 )
He was a goalie in football and did eventually quit cos he got fed up with being "blamed" for defensive lapses. The coach (who was a colleague of mine) was very unsupportive when I said he was thinking of quitting, which shocked me coming from a rugby background.
The culture in rugby is quite different - but you definitely do get knob-end parents and coaches shouting crap from the sidelines. As a ref, I know this... however, I wouldn't dreeeeam of refereeing football!
Anyway, let the kid join a team, see how it goes. As said, at such a young age it's all good.

As for talk of not liking the football “culture”, Jesus Christ… That culture is the national sport. Playing and watching football is bloody brilliant

I dont like the culture in adult football. Its still way behind the times, and isnt family inclusive (although it is changing). Fighting is not unusual still at football league grounds, really aggressive bad language and antagonising the opposition supporters etc. That is not a good culture imo, certainly when you can go to rugby matches, be stood next to an spectator from the opposition both with a beer in your hand.

Womens football is slowly changing to outdated male culture of the game but its going to take a while !

Grass roots football is an exemplar of how the adult spectators should behave.

One thing not mentioned on above is the cost of the sport. Football is still fairly cheap to play compared to other sports. My sons grassroots team subsidised some of the subs for those who really couldnt afford and all helped transporting each other to games.

Like any sport as you go up the standards the costs increase to some degree, but nothing like other sports as clubs pick up training and kit fees. I just now spend my life transporting Jnr FD to matches which can be all over the country. Its still not cheap though.

Watching your kids play sport is fantastic, I blooming love it !!

Yesterday we went straight from a disappointing 1-nil defeat at football to make it to the rugby club on time for the lad (13) to play the 2nd half . Coming on 15-nil down he helped change the game and his team won 20-15 !!

Ups n downs ... strikes and gutters .... life !!

Will there be wallies at football?  Yes !! ....  it definitely attracts more than its fair share (having spent lots and lots of time on rugby, basketball, netball, cricket, swimming and gymnastics sidelines)

But I see it as an education, it allows your kids to see adults behaving poorly and how you, as an adult, respond to that.

But you are right....  Kids are like dogs, they need daily exercise !! ( As do I )

But most importantly .... please, please encourage your kids in ANYthing they want to do.

SUPPORT THEM !

We go to watch Aberdeen matches primarily and yes the atmosphere in some games can be toxic but most teams have a family section. But going to games at that level is expensive, typically around £30 for an adult and other prices vary from club to club. But if three of us go it's probably £60-75 for tickets, then pies and petrol on top of that, maybe chips too on the way home. But this season I've been to a few Spartans mens games. They play in the fourth division, first season as a professional club and it's much more family friendly. Smaller crowds mean it's much quieter and less sweaty. Much cheaper too and the pies are better. So there are family friendly experiences out there if you know where to go.

I simply cannot see a reason at all why any parent would choose to dissuade their child from doing whatever sport they show an interest in.

My lad did both footy and rugby, enjoyed them both but once they started playing matches - clashed. So he opted to stick with football.

By and large it is great. There's some people with agendas for their children  -touting them to scouts and league clubs and already start to see a bit of club politics...which is what dissuaded me from getting involved in the coaching side of things. I just turn up and cheer a couple of times per week.

Really haven't seen too much on the sidelines with the shouty parents. It's all been good natured and encouraging (we are u10 level). Maybe we just have a nice league! From my son's perspective - he's made a lot of friends from other schools that play at the same group and when he wins/scores it makes his weekend. That said, the opposite can be true as well.

On balance, he's gaining a lot from it - although because it is getting quite competitive - with additional training sessions, academy days etc....it is a time commitment for us as parents, and him. I think it is important for him to do other sports and hobbies as well (he loves his MTB, Bouldering, Basketball) - but squeezing everything in is just not possible.

My youngest daughter was really keen to start playing. I had similar misgivings to the OP - played team sports up to leaving Uni, and go and watch rugby. But I wasn't a fan of the pushy parent, diving, shouting at the ref side of football. I'm pleased to say at her club, I was totally wrong. She's playing in an under 10 league, no results are published and the focus is firmly on development. Coaches made it very clear at the start of the season that your kid might be the best player, but at this level everyone gets equal game time. It's amazing to see how some of the less naturally talented kids have come on through hard work and opportunity, and they're moving up the league. There's more emphasis on enjoyment and team building - at one tournament the other teams were going through drills before the first match, our lot were seeing if the whole team would fit on one swing in the park! Usual other positives, learning to lose, take criticism, exercise. It's great. Other parents are all nice - no hassle there.

I also think it's really important for her to be good at something that's hers - she's not doing it to please us, it's her own thing

I simply cannot see a reason at all why any parent would choose to dissuade their child from doing whatever sport they show an interest in.

Kids are fickle, sometimes you just need to stick with it and don't let them just follow the crowd as thats often the reason they want to do something. My lad (among other sports) plays rugby. There was a phase he went through where all he wanted to do was play football and it was totally unfair how I made him play rugby... Fast forward two years and he's loving playing rugby and while he still likes football, he doesn't want to play in a team any more. I think thats partly because he's realised that there's some kids on his team that play both sports competitively, and they're always the ones arguing with the ref, being sent off etc. and he doesn't want anything to do with it as a competitive sport, even though he still enjoys playing it with his mates.

You sound like the small minded one OP.

Yeah I did didn't I. Hence this post to find out more. Still, there is an entire side of football I think everyone wished didn't exist. As mentioned in the first reply, football’s accessible. This has both positive and negative implications.

Kids are fickle, sometimes you just need to stick with it and don’t let them just follow the crowd as thats often the reason they want to do something.

So this hits on a point, really this is us wondering if football something we push him into, i.e. he's given us the idea and shown interest. Being let loose and running around a field for an hour would be great for him.

BMX racing. My lad loves it and it seems to be getting more and more popular at the moment

I started my lad with this at 7 years old because it was my sport as a youth. He was brilliant - came 2nd in his 1st race & looked like he’d a get a number 1 plate in no time. The problem was that he couldn’t handle the pressure being all on his shoulders come final time.

if it didn’t go perfectly he would lose his shit. That wasn’t nice to see for such a young lad. We had a heart to heart; he is very competitive & sporty  and asked if he could do a team sport, which made a lot of sense to help him with stress.

Anyway, he took to football instantly & now plays at a decent level (although he’s currently out of action with a torn ACL).

I hated football as a kid & was very reluctant to put him through it, but I’ve got to say I’m now totally the other way - the mates he’s got through the team are the best mates he’ll ever have. He knows everyone in our town and seemingly everyone know him.

He’s a qualified FA referee & when he’s fit & able to, he earns more refereeing a couple of matches at the weekend than his sister does working two full days as a waitress.

Grassroots football is a great well organised & often very professional scene in this country. If he wants to do it then let him.

Found something very local on Friday afternoons (Scotland's schools are half days on Fridays)... likely to be a waiting list but will enquire.

let him play everything and anything.
Let him choose what he wants to stick with later.

From a pure accessibility perspective, I doubt anything beats football.

I totally support bmx as a sport, but I've never come across anything with such intense parents.. its nuts with USA families using at as a moto pre-cursor for 5 and up.
Thankfully my boys don't want to play ice hockey, which is potentially another intense sideline sport.

I coach u13 soccer, absolutely zero sideline drama in the last 4 years aside with managing 20 players and their wide spread of personalities

Not read the rest of the thread, but dear god the OPs is such a narrow view of football especially at the grassroots level. Was & still is a great hobby, sport & push to employment for my youngest (now nearly 30 & working as a physiotherapist). I also became best friends with one of the other football dads 🙂 oh & I'm not into football at all.

It is a narrow view but only because my view has been narrow, and obviously not of the better bits. As others have said, from the outside some aspects are off putting.

As I said in my further post, I've found something that looks promising