[Closed] Talk to me about.. a new life

I like the look of those island past tazmania

I am not sure if you can be part-time hippies ? I think it is one of those all or nothing things...

You can. I've got the option of contracting, where you work for 6 months then take the money and wander off 🙂

There is a magical golden middle ground.....

[img] [/img]

😆

Ah.. the dream...!

Can you have middle-class pikeys? Audi Q7, brand new Bailey caravan...

Whatever you do, do it before your kids start school. School does complicate things a little and although not impossible, it does make the prospect of moving seem more daunting.

If you can find employment over there, I'd recommend emigrating to Australia. I know a few people who've moved over there (most with young kids) and they've not looked back. I think the cost of living is more expensive than some Brits anticipate, but all the people I know that have gone to Oz say that the quality of life and general outlook of people is so much better than the UK.

You can. I've got the option of contracting, where you work for 6 months then take the money and wander off

It takes a strong strong mind to do this. I know a few people who started this with best intentions, but are addicted to the money so can't turn a contract down. Now living away from family 'giving it all up next year..'
and missing some of the best years of their childrens lives.

Scale down, sell the crap you don't need (I think whatever meets your definition of a nice house is worth the money though), pay down that mortgage and maybe take a step back work wise. Enjoy what you have eh?

I'm finally being made redundant end of next month, and whilst it's a bit scary I'm seeing it as a new start. If what I have lined up doesn't work out, I'm moving on... idealy to run a cafe in South Devon 😀

Australia is out of the question. No point in swapping a suburban house in the UK for a suburban one on the other side of the world.

Need a change of lifestyle not location.

but all the people I know that have gone to Oz say that the quality of life and general outlook of people is so much better than the UK.

Yeah, ex-pats always bang on about that, to validate themselves 🙂

It takes a strong strong mind to do this. I know a few people who started this with best intentions, but are addicted to the money so can't turn a contract down

Yeah I contracted for 5 years and spent the lot on crap. Well, not all crap, but still it's amazing how money can just disappear.

Got any savings? Where's your house?

Try letting your house out as a holiday let. April to October.

For the 6 months it's being let try a variety of things - houseboat, yurt etc and see if you all can hack it. A bloke I used to work with did it and never looked back.

No savings, house is on an anonymous development just off the M4 outside Cardiff... would let as a normal let though, which would cover the mortgage.

Letting your house to try it out is not a bad idea, but a houseboat, whilst attractive, would be trickier 🙂

Why did you have children?

get the juices flowing.
http://www.amazon.com/Tiny-Homes-Shelter-Lloyd-Kahn/dp/0936070528
[img] [/img]
my current favourite book.

Why did you have children?

+1, there's your big mistake. I was doing great on the living-in-different-places thing until that happened.

Can I be the first to call #firstworldproblem

Actually I sympathise a lot! An existence which involved 2 days working in london and 5 days dossing by the sea side in wales is currently top of the aspirational wish list. It's not unachievable, but it will take some balls to uproot kids to see if it works.

How about Germany? 😉

Pretty much feel the same way at the mo 🙁

Busy, responsible job.
Always putting stuff on expenses for work
Mortgage keeps going up - cause the mortgage companys say "because we can" 👿
Family relationships (parents & inlaws) getting strained - not seeing enough of the grandchildren
Seem to work hard, earn a reasonable amount, but constantly chasing our own tail.

For sure a first world problem, but
Getting a bit wearing

Seem to work hard, earn a reasonable amount, but constantly chasing our own tail.

That's the kicker isn't it? You'd think at some point it'd get easier...

I've got nothing useful to add other than my own self pity 🙂

Could you not sell the kids into slavery. I understand that at 1 and 3 their uses are fairly limited, but you could market them as an appreciating asset. A long term investment. Its not too long til they could be darn'pit?

"New Life" is the second UK single by Depeche Mode, originally released on 13 June 1981. It was not commercially released in the United States.
There were two versions of the song available. The 7" version would later become the "album version", as it would eventually appear on the UK version of Speak & Spell, released in October 1981, and a 12" "remix," which differs from the "album version" in that it has a different intro, intensely percusive and harder, and an added synth part in the "solo" vocal section in the middle of the song, which is not present on the 7" mix. The "remix" would later appear on the US version of Speak & Spell.
The single became Depeche Mode's breakthrough hit in the UK, peaking at #11. On 25 June 1981, the band performed "New Life" during their debut on the BBC's Top of the Pops. The band would perform the song twice more on the show, on July 16 and July 30, 1981.
The b-side, "Shout!", is the first Depeche Mode song to get a 12" extended remix, called the "Rio Remix". This mix would later appear on the remix compilation Remixes 81–04, released in 2004. It is the earliest recorded song available on the compilation.

Not what you meant... oh 😳

How long would it take to clear your debts? Cut down on crap you don't need, pay down debts and some of the mortgage if you can, and take a job with less travel.

Is your wife from Wales and/or are you all settled there? With the children young it could be an opportunity to move closer to work opportunities (you're in IT IIRC). It'll mean a more expensive location no doubt, but if you can get a job closer to home you can spend more time with the wife/children.

While it might be nice to dream of living a carefree and hand to mouth life, 99% of us couldn't hack it and with kids to consider I wouldn't try.

Sounds boring I know but if I were you I'd try to get in a position where I could spend more time with the family and still provide for them.

I reckon if you have debts and zero equity plus 2 very young kids you might need a plan 🙂

Are the debts separate to the mortgage? If so can you remortgage and combine them? Rental costs are pretty high and you might be able to get enough rent to cover it all. Long term you'd be unlikely to be able to convert your mortgage to a buy to let because IIRC most lenders want a chunk of equity in the property first. I think you could do a short term 6 monthly thing though, just don't tell the mortgage company!

Another angle to think about is just to bloody move! If you aren't tied to a single location why not just move to a nice area that has a little more of what you want and a little less of what you don't?

What you're saying sounds primarily like a money thing so I'd address that first.

Do not emigrate.

Contract, pay off mortgage, feed your soul with frequent life-affirming sessions doing what you love, with whom you love.

but all the people I know that have gone to Oz say that the quality of life and general outlook of people is so much better than the UK.

It's the same in Canada as well. I don't really like the generally pessimistic/negative outlook that many people in the UK have, you don't really get it over there!

Face the facts you're in the rat race....

But that doesn't mean you can't deviate off the track...

and ...

"pay off mortgage, feed your soul with frequent life-affirming sessions doing what you love, with whom you love."

+1

Why did you have children?

It's both solipsism and an antidote to solipsism.

What you're saying sounds primarily like a money thing so I'd address that first.

Yeah it is - at current rates that will take quite a few years to sort at least. Contracting could sort it in a year, but it could also make matters worse.

feed your soul with frequent life-affirming sessions doing what you love, with whom you love.

Yeah.. well that's a significant part of the problem in the first place! When you work, you haven't the time, and when you're not working you are recovering from work.

Face the facts you're in the rat race...

No chance. A race implies competition. I'm just trying to get to the point where I can have frequent life-affirming sessions doing what I love, with whom I love.

Lol at the pay off mortage comment. Great idea, why didn't I think of that?

It is a #firstworldproblem.

For what it's worth, it's what the better half and I are trying to do - what's stopping us at the moment is a definite plan. But should we sprog, I want the sprogs to grow up somewhere where there's a better culture and outlook on life - for me that isn't suburbia.

When you work, you haven't the time, and when you're not working you are recovering from work.

When the kids came along I (we) made the decision to work a lot less. We have a lot less money, especially since we're on just one wage, but I have breakfast with the kids every morning and am home early enough to at least help with bath and bedtime stuff every night, usually early enough to play for an hour or so beforehand. I know a lot of people do it, lots of my friends included, but I can't imagine not seeing the kids every day.

We can't really afford to do much anymore and treats (toys) come second hand from ebay, but weekends are generally spent doing family stuff and having fun. Walks in local woods, cycle rides to the park for playground and picnics. You don't really need to spend much doing that kind of thing. For me there's nothing better, some more money would be nice but it's not vital.

Then you're working too much!

Lol.. you've seen how long I spend on here 🙂

Part time is not an option. Can't afford it. I do WFH 50% of the time.

You don't really need to spend much doing that kind of thing.

That's what we do. Problem is, it's not enough for me or the wife. We're cursed with ambition.

I want the sprogs to grow up somewhere where there's a better culture and outlook on life - for me that isn't suburbia.

The location has little to do with it. You create your own culture and outlook in your own house.

No point in swapping a suburban house in the UK for a suburban one on the other side of the world.

going surfing before work, riding after, weekend camps in the bush under a blaze of the milky way and eskys of cold beer. rubbish.

Is mrs molgrips working? I'm guessing you are paying a certain amount of nursery costs at the minute?

You are slap bang in the middle of the skintest bit of having small children. And believe me I KNOW what that's like! Once both your children are at school the amount you pay out falls massively. Our nursery and nanny costs were around 900 a month up until July and had been that way for around 18 - 24 months. From September that falls to 100.

My advice, money wise is realise that it's going to get a LOT easier in a few years time and try to limit the debts you run up in the meantime.

As far as time/work balance and stuff that's entirely up to you to resolve! For me that meant a lot less riding and socialising with friends. Again that starts to ease off somewhat as the kids get a bit older.

Don't beat yourself up about it being a bit crap at the minute, it doesn't stay like this forever 🙂

...Audi Q7, brand new Bailey caravan...

Spend less, have more time.

It's the same in Canada as well. I don't really like the generally pessimistic/negative outlook that many people in the UK have, you don't really get it over there!

Not my experience at all, bunch of whining ****ers the lot of them

...Audi Q7, brand new Bailey caravan...

Spend less, have more time.

That was a joke, regarding the idea of middle class pikeys.

Is mrs molgrips working?

No. She hasn't enough career experience to earn enough to make it worthwhile currently. If she does when the kids are in school, we'll have a boatload more money.

For me that meant a lot less riding and socialising with friends

Sorry what? Friends? Socialising? Riding? Not sure what you mean.

We're cursed with ambition

Aah, you want to jettison that monkey. Impose it on your kids and go Competitive Dad instead 🙂

I used to be ambitious but 15 years of corporate life taught me that it isn't necessarily the brightest or cleverest or even hardest working that get the rewards - in fact it appears to be a disadvantage, as no one can afford to not have you in your job. I've been a lot happier since I made peace with that, and realised I'd be happy stacking shelves if I could cover the bills as all my real 'wants' lie outside of work.

"Lol at the pay off mortage comment. Great idea, why didn't I think of that? "

I'm afraid you'll be suck in the race with little sarcastic comments like that.... we've given you ideas and you've thrown them back in our face ... How do you honestly feel about your comment? Has it made you feel “good” ? … Has that help feed your soul...?

Lol.. you've seen how long I spend on here

Problem is, it's not enough for me or the wife

We're cursed with ambition

Cake and eat it springs to mind, and I sympathise because I feel the same way sometimes. In fact it's threads like this that help me see what's important. I think we both need a big lottery win!

brassneck +1 on the corporate life thing.

Sorry what? Friends? Socialising? Riding? Not sure what you mean.

Sounds like that could be missing from your life then.....

Part time is not an option. Can't afford it.

Then you can't afford to work 6 months on six months off.

Reduce your outgoings. Cheap, old car. No new bikes. No new 'toys'. Cut back on TV channels. Don't buy any new clothes. Live on the unfashionable side of town.

We get away with only me working full-time, because we made the decision from the offset that we'd only get a mortgage based on one salary and that we'd not buy new cars.

Once the kids are at secondary school (they're 9 and almost-7 now), my wife will increase her hours and work commitment and I can reduce mine.

Fixed school holidays and the mrs having a sister she wants to visit abroad has resulted in us only having half terms free until summer 2014.

😯

mogrim - Member

Why did you have children?

+1, there's your big mistake. I was doing great on the living-in-different-places thing until that happened.

Suck it up and accept the responsibility, stop thinking of yourself.

You can become ****less later when they're all growd up.

You'll be a lot happier when you stop trying to argue with TJ and elf on FB 😉

Nice

Thing is molgrips, with no equity in your house and no prospect of reducing your hours you are stuck in the baby trap for a few more years. When your youngest is a little older Mrs M can get a part time job and then a full time one a bit further on.

Ride your bike and see your mates sometimes if you can. It makes all the difference.

And have a plan, it helps enormously, particularly when you are feeling shite.

i think all of us that are in our 30/40's 'the parenting age' will understand all or most of how you feel. You have our empathy.

Getting out of the situation looks like the trick BUT I suspect where ever and what ever you move to, will still have some of the same feelings for you.

Some call this a mid life crisis, a realisation that where you are is where you have aimed to be so far in life, but actually it isnt what makes you happy.

And now you look for the solution, another way of living, another way of spending you time. Its an age old dilema and not one that man has found the answer for.

So in the little time you have left on this earth work out what is important, it might be a car, it might be a house but its more likely to be time and people.

A few years ago there was a study done of dying people and it asked them what they regretted, none of them said, ooooh I didnt own a porsche. Almost all of them said they wish they'd spent more time with family and friends and regretting not giving them enough time.

I wish I could live what I wrote above, but damn it, I want a new shiny bike/car/house! lol.

You are slap bang in the middle of the skintest bit of having small children. And believe me I KNOW what that's like! Once both your children are at school the amount you pay out falls massively. Our nursery and nanny costs were around 900 a month up until July and had been that way for around 18 - 24 months. From September that falls to 100.

My advice, money wise is realise that it's going to get a LOT easier in a few years time and try to limit the debts you run up in the meantime.

As far as time/work balance and stuff that's entirely up to you to resolve! For me that meant a lot less riding and socialising with friends. Again that starts to ease off somewhat as the kids get a bit older.

you've made me feel alot better! thank you

The stuff you post tells us you are a spendthift for whom indulging in (expensive) little luxuries is your raison d'être, Molgrips. Did you ever hire that[url= http://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/sports-car-hire ]sportscar[/url] BTW? Hopefully not with two other perfectly seviceable cars sitting on the drive that day.

Your aspirational, keeping-up-with-Joneses lifestyle means you always spend more than you can afford. The day you remedy that your life will improve, until then it will be a rat race as others have dared to pointt out. You are racing around just to stay one step ahead of your creditors.

What you eat and what you spend both come down to self-control. Eat less and you'll lose weight; spend less and you'll pay down your debt. Stop and think of the consequences every time you walk into the kitchen or reach for your credit card.

You are a contractor who can work as much or as little of the year as you choose, you work from home loads and lets face it work very little for the money.

Enjoy what you have, not what you want.

PS - I'm all about what I want, not what I have 🙂

molgrips - Member
We're cursed with [s]ambition[/s] greed.

That's the truth of it. Ambition is working towards what you want your life to be, not the accumulation of possessions.

No point in swapping a suburban house in the UK for a suburban one on the other side of the world.

Don't know, from where I'm sitting in Spain I'd rather be here than in the UK. Still got a mortgage, though 🙁

Similar to Stoner's book: http://freecabinporn.com/ Dangerous viewing! (SFW despite the name!)

Where has molgrips gone?

He isn't actually [b]Working[/b] (tm) is he?

What a capitalist pig! 🙂

No point in swapping a suburban house in the UK for a suburban one on the other side of the world.

This is a really interesting one, and probably one of the major reasons I haven't really gone for Australia/USA/NZ/whereever despite being continually told by people (who went on holiday I hasten to add) that I'd love the 'lifestyle'. Always wonder what dream people are comparing with when they are 'living the dream'.

Where has molgrips gone?

He remembered that MrsGrips uses STW.

Then you can't afford to work 6 months on six months off.

Let me explain. As a contractor in IT you earn 2-3x what you do as a permie. I was a contractor for 5 years, pissed all the money up the wall so I made no progress, now I'm a permie again.

Reduce your outgoings. Cheap, old car. No new bikes. No new 'toys'. Cut back on TV channels. Don't buy any new clothes.

Check, check, check, check and check. I don't need a lesson in budgeting, I've been through that already. There just isn't enough slack to transform the situation, but [b]that's not what this thread is about[/b]

What kind of ambition?

The ambition to DO things, not to own them. Many people are happy to go to work with their friends, and socialise with them at the weekends.

I want to travel without a schedule, be a musician, be a top class racer, do the Tour Divide, climb mountains, be a photographer, be well read, be a writer, etc etc etc. Many of those things require a lifetime of dedication on their own.

Your aspirational, keeping-up-with-Joneses lifestyle

You really should not kid yourself that you are good at understanding people. You're absolutely terrible at it!

I can show you my credit card statements if you think I am living the high life on credit.

This is nothing more than a Mid-life crisis.

I want to travel without a schedule, be a musician, be a top class racer, do the Tour Divide, climb mountains, be a photographer, be well read, be a writer, etc etc etc.

[quote=wrecker ]This is nothing more than a Mid-life crisis.
+1

But that's not to say that reviewing ones lifestyle is a bad idea.

The ambition to DO things, not to own them. Many people are happy to go to work with their friends, and socialise with them at the weekends.

I want to travel without a schedule, be a musician, be a top class racer, do the Tour Divide, climb mountains, be a photographer, be well read, be a writer, etc etc etc. Many of those things require a lifetime of dedication on their own.

Have exactly the same thoughts on a daily basis. Trying to find a way to do it before having kids and getting nowhere fast. Another year of work will give me ample experience to widen the potential fo contracting jobs in what I do massively. After that, I'd like to think its game on. Truthfully, the 6 months of contracting I did do were some of the most insecure times I've known - but that was with a different outlook. I did save a shedload of cash but bottled the 2nd part of the plan to take off and follow my dreams.

Molgrips, no disrespect, but if I had a job that meant I could live anywhere in the uk, I wouldn't live on an 'anonymous estate just off the M4' . If I could get a field services job in my line of work, I'd be living a very different life. As I said, no offence intended mate.

wrecker » This is nothing more than a Mid-life crisis.

+1

But that's not to say that reviewing ones lifestyle is a bad idea.

+1

Sorry but to me it doesn't sound like you have the necessary imagination to change anything. take a week off.. ride your bike then come back and tell US what you've thought of!

I want to travel without a schedule, be a musician, be a top class racer, do the Tour Divide, climb mountains, be a photographer, be well read, be a writer, etc etc etc. Many of those things require a lifetime of dedication on their own.

My niece came over yesterday to borrow a load of kit as she's climbing Kilimanjaro in a couple of weeks, it made me wonder if I'd ever get the opportunity to use this kit in anger again and I decided probably not. Sad but true.

I used to laugh at people when they talked about adults living their lives through their children but now I think I understand it a little more. For me at least it's time to realise that I won't fulfill all those dreams and ambitions I once had, the best thing I can do now is help to position my kids so that they might be better able to fulfill theirs. Not sure yet how to do that short of a lottery win, other than make sure they have a full and rounded childhood with all the trappings that money can't buy.

Edit to add: I'm not actually the self pitying wreck the above might suggest - I've had a great time over the years traveling and getting up to stuff I probably shouldn't so I have no regrets, I think I've just reached that point in life where I've realised it's time to give something back.

molgrips - was it you that was going to do that off-road triathlon?

How did that go?

This is nothing more than a Mid-life crisis.

Not really. I've always felt this way 🙂

Molgrips, no disrespect, but if I had a job that meant I could live anywhere in the uk, I wouldn't live on an 'anonymous estate just off the M4'

Yep. Can't afford to move right now, but when I can I will.

The quicker you realise that this aint going to happen, the happier you'll be.

Of course I realise I have responsibilities, I take them very seriously. But I do not accept that I just have to give up. If you stop trying to make your life the way you want it, what's the point? I know I won't fulfill them all, but some would be nice.

Sorry to say it but I actually wouldn't call those ambitions, I'd call them pipe dreams.

See above!

molgrips - was it you that was going to do that off-road triathlon?

How did that go?

It's in two weeks, but I've pulled out. Can't afford it.. of course if I were like Edukator thinks I'd have put it on the credit card...

🙂

And how did the training go? It just seems to me that you were unable to achieve that small goal, so aiming for something so much larger is doomed to failure. Not that you shouldn't have the ambition to stretch yourself, but why not aim for something more achievable?

You need a long term plan. Personally since I've moved to London, my plan has always been to release the equity in my London house to pay for cheap living back up North. My friends always joked that I'd move back and buy Yorkshire, I am just about to realise that, but it probably wouldn't have happened with out some semblance of a plan. If you want to build a shed in a wood, set a date, find out what it will cost and put the plan in place!

I will be mortgage free living in 2 years time, at which point I'm pray for redundancy from (or just leave) the middle management rat race and do something less stressful. Just have to work out what that something is now, all the other parts of the plan are in place.

And how did the training go? It just seems to me that you were unable to achieve that small goal, so aiming for something so much larger is doomed to failure

Training was going ok. If I'd had the money I'd be going, and I'd be completing it. As it happens I'm quite depressed about not being able to do it since it was going to be the only bikey thing I'd manage all year, and I'd put in a lot of work. I wasn't unable to achieve it, I was unable to afford the fuel, the entry fee and the associated costs.

If there were a big mountain triathlon near home, I'd have entered it.

but why not aim for something more achievable?

What, like a local sprint tri? Cos I'd get no satisfaction from achieving it.

You need a long term plan

Problem with those is that they take a long time, and I've messed about for so long already that I'll be old by the time they come good 🙂

you'll still be a wage slave living next to the M4 when you are 60 in that case dude

If I knuckle down and try to pay off my mortgage asap, then I'll be a wage slave at 60.

Which is why I think NOW is a better time 🙂

How many of those ambitions could you reasonably fulfil, Molgrips, even if you worked on them full time? Being good at just one of them would require time, effort and determination - even if you have the genes. Given you have the rest of your life then attacking one after the other you might just do it, but give yourself attainable goals as success is sweet and failure dissatifying

[u]Travel[/u]: where to? I like rding my bike around but after a month or so I like to go home because cycle-camping is hard work and I like my cosy routine back home too (as do Madame and junior). You didn't like Germany which is a country I feel very much at ease in. Where do you feel happy?

[u]be a musician[/u]: I played guitar as a kid but realised that I didn't have the talent to be great. I've enjoyed teaching my son though.

[u]be a top class racer[/u] I won the British Autotest championship but didn't have the money or talent to make a living from rallying. Pretty much everything I did was aimed at that though and girlfriends didn't last - I lived in the car on Welsh Water's car park when I didn't have enough cash to pay the rent. Rallying was the one thing in my life that I ended frustrated/dissatisfied with. I've done quite well in Winter triathlon so all the training I did to get rally fit paid off, triathlon is quite easy as Madame and now junior are into that too. All we've done today is go for a run and a swim. Edit: I did big mountain Summer triathlons too but 59th at Embrunman isn't top class.

[u]climb mountains[/u] That's what I did when I met Madame and gave up motorsport. We lived in a T2 while Madame wrote up her doctorate and camped under Europe's best climbing and monutaineering spots. We still ski tour including the odd race, we'll all climb a Pyrenean summit on Thursday if the weather forecast is right.

I'm not intereseted in photogtraphy beyond snap shots but I do like reading - mainly in French and German. I'm not well-read though, I read what I like, not what a well-read person should read, STW for example.

See that P next to your name, Molgrips? 😉 I made my money in business thanks to being quite good at understanding people. You see, I've done some of the things you'd like to do and done them well. I'm sure that starting from your current place I could do them too but not with the combination of South Wales, a family, a heap of debt and a time-consuming job. I hope that either you reaslise that your wife and kids are more important to you than all the other things and enjoy your current life, or that you find a way of reaching your ambitions that means your family is involved and share in your success.

Assuming you want to keep the wife and two kids (I would), you have three variables to work on: location, debt levels and job.

Page 2 and we've not sold the kids yet? This place is going downhill.

I'd say 4 variables - spending levels too. And it's the one that is easiest to take control of.
Think of what you want to do, not what you want to buy.

Or page 3 even. My favourite page.

[img] [/img]
Have you thought about letting Jesus into your life?

Is educator actually surfmat?

I'm going to buy a big van at some point and drive around the UK and Europe in it.

How many of those ambitions could you reasonably fulfil, Molgrips, even if you worked on them full time?

Any of them, that's why they are in the list.

you have three variables to work on: location, debt levels and job.

So wait - you mean.. I need to PAY OFF the debts? WOW! That's amazing! That's for that insight, I never realised! I'll go do that now..

🙄

Let's make this clear: In the past, I spent too much, although not on expensive greedy consumerist tat, but that is in the past. As of now, expenditure is at a minimum. I realise that debts need paying off, but none of you can help me plan that because you don't have access to my personal finances, nor should you.

So we can get that lot out of the way.

The thread was actually about alternative lifestyles, that don't require a large injection of money or the liquidation of an asset.

So far people seem to be either a) struggling along in the same boat, b) don't have kids or c) are happy with the normal situation.

Sorry to be harsh, but it sounds a bit like you desperately want to be doing all these dream things, but can't actually be arsed with putting in the effort/sacrifice to make them happen?

I sort of know how you feel, but I don't think it's healthy. Try becoming a buddhist. 🙂

I don't agree with having no ambition/drive to do these things btw - but you've got to be realistic, then commit to things and really go for it - no-one is going to hand opportunities to you on a plate.

Tramp?
[img] [/img]

can't actually be arsed with putting in the effort/sacrifice to make them happen?

Well no, not really.

But as above. I'd like to hear about alternative lifestyles. I didn't post for help on how to budget.

but you've got to commit to things and really go for it - no-one is going to hand opportunities to you on a plate

10, 15 or even 20 years ago that would have been sound advice. However I am where I am.