Stolen from under your nose

Someone stole a mountain board out of the open boot of my car in the 30s it took me to go into the house with a surfboard and back out.

I had a shotgun shoved in my face during the IRA robbing the premises I worked in 😄

Somewhat paradoxically, that’s when I realised the ceasefire was for real and permanent

I had a Santa Cruz Chameleon stolen from me the day I built it.

Rode it round to my friends house, cycled it into his garage attached to his house, went in the kitchen to get him and it was gone by the time I got back 30 seconds later.

Got it back about 18 months later when the Police found it in a Crack/smack den. Sans fork and wheels but most of it was still there.

A former friend stole my Raleigh Dynatec out of my garage when I was a teenager.

I was sat having lunch with a colleague in Liverpool docks. We were sat at end of jetty wearing buoyancy aids with keys and 'deadmans' leads - and RIB safety boat at our feet.
Two scallies nonchalantly walked past us, climbed in the boat and started looking for keys. We challenged them - and were told it was thier boat!
The ensuing scuffle led to one of the darlings ending up in the drink. Oh dear.

I've also sat halfway up Tryfan and watched our minibus get broken into - and everyone's spare kit knicked...

A friend watched two blokes walk a washing machine out of John Lewis in Edinburgh. At the time only security were allowed to challenge and they weren't around. She also became aware that the "lady" trying the expensive pushchair for size with her child. Wasn't really intending to purchase it

Isn't anyone going to post a picture of a man missing his moustache?

Working in bargain booze when I was a student. Scallies wander in, pick up 24 slab of Carling, wander out. As a total wuss on min wage, I wasn't about to stop them.

We lost a couple of bikes from the bike shop I used to work at. One was a con artist who did a couple of test rides, chatted to the young sales guy, did another ride, came back... Then took a nice expensive Klein and rode off.
The credit card he'd left turned out to be stolen of course. After that we started taking payments to validate the card before any test ride was allowed.

And one was simply a guy walking in off the street during a busy moment when all the staff were occupied, snipping the cable lock that held a £2000 bike in the stand and casually walking out the door with it. Gone in seconds.
We beefed up security after that and moved the expensive bikes away from the door.

Once accidently stole a patio heater years ago.

We were driving home on a scenic (non-motorway) route from Lancashire and stopped for a break at a garden centre that had a closing down sale. The patio heaters were really cheap so we decided to get one. My wife went with one sales assistant to get the heater loaded into the car while I went with another assistant to get a gas bottle. They loaded everything into the car and I asked if we were good to go and the two assistants waved us on our way. I assumed the wife had paid and she assumed I had paid but we were about 150 miles south before either thought to check.

I watched as 2 of todmordens finest loaded a 250 kg diesel wacker plate into the back of an aygo and drive off with back end on road the lads on site gave chase in van but luckily for all didn’t find them. Most other similar tales based in Bradford! Stihl saw taken out of hands of labourer using it, revved up in his face and went polis never attended😵I’m sure some bits of Bradford is ok Are there any?

My Finance Director once held the (keypad locked) office door open for a thief as he walked out with a few laptops under his arm. Turned out he’d tailgated someone in to the office moments earlier and the FD assumed they were from IT…

In this case the thief didn't get away with it.

Back in the 80s in a previous job I was walking along a lane behind a terrace of big sandstone houses in the west end of Glasgow. Glanced left to see a housebreaker inside an open back window of one of the houses. Seeing us he started running across the room towards the door to the hall.

My colleague went to the window while I sprinted round to cover the other side of the house. By the time I got there I got a radio message to return to the back.

Turns out the householders who were away from home had locked all the internal doors so Billy Burglar couldn't get out the room. When he had tried to get past my colleague as he came out a window 6 or 8 feet up he fell and broke his leg.

Turned out to be a guy in his 30s with a few housebreaking convictions going back 15 years but no recent ones.

A real fluke. If we had walked along 5 minutes earlier or later he would have got away with it.

Happy smile. In my case I found the ****er at the railway station with my bike. Win.

Got it back about 18 months later when the Police found it in a Crack/smack den.

Back, crack and smack?

My friend stole a shed from b and q.

Going for a run out on the canal towpath one time, I got stopped by a bloke walking the other way.

"Hey mate," he asks, "is there anyone in that boat?" indicating a narrowboat I'd just run past.

"I've no idea, sorry" I replied.

"Ah right," he says, "only, I'm going to rob it."

Late 90's, was walking through Bede Park in Leicester one morning around 8.30'ish on the way to Uni, from the houses opposite a man climbed out of a kitchen window holding a proper 80's style leather holdall and ran off proper fast - literally, the first thing I thought when I saw what was going on was, crikey, he must be very late for work!

Then after about an hour at uni it dawned on me what had happened

Proper Father Ted - Those ladies were in the nip! moment.

Stopped a bloke pinching a kids MTB once. The kid had locked the bike frame to a sign post but the post had no sign on top. Big fella lifted bike straight off the top, jumped on and started to ride towards me. Luckily the shop behind me stuck out a bit into the pavement and a quick shove at the right time sent the fella straight into the wall. It was more luck than judgement and as soon as he stood up I realised how much bigger he was than me. The mates I was with realised what was going on at this point and he wandered off. Kid came legging out of Woolworth shortly after. 🤣

I once came out an off licence to find a female of the traveller persuasion walking off with my dog I had tied up outside. Literally in the shop under 2 minutes.

Someone picked up a limited edition 9k specialised venge from outside a coffee shop in Windsor and rode off on it in front of the sat cyclists. Of course you can’t run in cleats. Nor mount a bike and chase fast enough if you don’t know the area. About as blatant as is possible. That cafe has gone but not the bike thieves.

I had a Saturday job at the local Woolworths record counter. The sales desk was located at the back of the shop and had a good view all the way to the front of the store. I watched as a tall slim man wearing a baggy jumper became a tall fat man wearing a tightly fitting jumper - He had shoved a double duvet under his knitted garment, and was trying to make his way unnoticed off the premises. The store security had other ideas!

I've also sat halfway up Tryfan and watched a minibus full of Scouts kit get cleared out. Seems to be a popular spot!

Someone came right into the conservatory on the back of my old house and nicked a dropper post from it, while we were eating about 6 feet away.

Vivid memories of walking past a Burtons as an 11 year old. Late teen came legging it out followed by a much smaller shop assistant of about the same age. Shop assistant performed the most amazing tap tackle I've ever seen and aspiring shoplifter hit the deck, head smacking the pavement with a sickening crack right next to my feet. Out cold with a blooded nose/mouth combo right out of Rocky.

Not sure if that was legit behaviour by the shop assistant even in the early 80's but that vision kept this teenager on the straight and narrow for the next few years.

Used to work at a Spar on Lewes Road in Brighton when I was at uni. About 11 am in the morning I was the only person on the shop floor (couple of others out back or in the office). Bloke comes in and asks for some cigarettes which are behind the counter. I turn round to look for them and in the meantime he picks up a 24 slab of beers that were stacked up on promo, and walks out. I went to the door and could see him cross over and go up a side street. I shout the manager down and we take a walk over where he’d gone only to find the beers just dumped in the side street. They were a Spar own brand and can only assume he had maybe meant to grab something a bit more upmarket?! We picked them up and took them back.

I’ve also sat halfway up Tryfan and watched a minibus full of Scouts kit get cleared out. Seems to be a popular spot!

Watching the team camper getting turned over stuck up on the crag at Seynes in France. Nothing much got taken, cos nothing much of value, but still a feeling of impotence that you can't do anything about it

I’ve also sat halfway up Tryfan and watched a minibus full of Scouts kit get cleared out.

Some people. The mind woggles.

3 week biking road trip around the European bike parks. Me, two mates and a Berlingo.

We pitched pop up tents in a few Aires when it was getting late and we couldn't drive any more.

Woke up in one to shouts from my mate that he'd been robbed. Someone had reached into his tent during the night, taken his shorts with his wallet, phone and passport etc in.

Had an absolute nightmare of a day after trying to sort things out with French police.

There was also a European couple at the same place that were in a camper van and the person had been inside the van as they slept and stolen stuff.

We found my mates shorts 100mtrs away, empty of stuff. Troy Lee shorts as well...

I'm forever thankful that they didn't get at my tent, me having the keys to the van with 3 mountain bikes and kit inside.
Doesn't bear thinking about...

Someone picked up a limited edition 9k specialised venge from outside a coffee shop in Windsor and rode off on it in front of the sat cyclists. Of course you can’t run in cleats. Nor mount a bike and chase fast enough if you don’t know the area. About as blatant as is possible.

There was a spate of that at Richmond Park - scenario was that a cyclist (actually dressed properly, looked the part) was having a coffee at the cafe there keeping an eye on what was coming and going and he'd spot something he liked the look of, finish his coffee and casually saunter over to the rack, get the bike and go. About 500m away was a van, parked up in one of the car parks and he'd ride to that, pop it in the back.

There is a massive Marks and Spencer in an out of town complex in Cheshire. I was shopping there and stood helpless as two gentlemen helped themselves to 2 whole rails of posh dinner suits. This was Christmas and the very tall thin chap snatched a whole rail of the trousers, while his very short and fat friend snatched the jackets. I was having an out of body experience and everything seemed to happen in slow motion, but I managed to somehow get the attention of a security guard who gave chase.

I had my Raleigh Mag Burner stolen at knifepoint when I was sat on it. That was nice, aged 11.

On the flip side I spotted a mates bike that was pinched from his house. It was outside the mosque 50m from my house. The police weren’t interested and I plucked up the courage and nicked it back.
They’d put purple bear trap pedals and bar ends on it (early 99s obvs)

Holiday in Spain staying in a caravan park...got drunk one night and fell asleep sitting on the doorstep of the caravan - woke up to the rest of the group walking around me as I was lying on the floor of the caravan with my legs hanging out the door.
I got up and asked where they'd put my shoes - no-one had touched them and they weren't anywhere in the caravan or around the caravan.
Someone had untied my shoes and removed them whilst I was asleep...I'm a sound sleeper at best of times and suspect the drunken sleep was even deeper.

I shout the manager down and we take a walk over where he’d gone only to find the beers just dumped in the side street. They were a Spar own brand and can only assume he had maybe meant to grab something a bit more upmarket?! We picked them up and took them back.

what had his mate stolen while you were chasing the stooge...

When all the bike shops were on Deansgate in Manchester, two guys in oily overalls pull up outside On Yer Bike with a flat bed, wheel a Yamaha FZR1000 on to the back of it, strap it down and drive off, next minute a bloke walks out of the shop and says 'WHERE THE **** IS MY BIKE?!

Takes some front that.

There were loads of bikers (including me) stood talking outside and nobody thought anything about someone wheeling a bike on to a truck outside a bike shop

While working in an outdoor shop someone stole an expensive pair of walking boots. The boot department was up the stairs, guy was trying on some boots he said he walked down the stairs in them to "show his wife" and never returned, leaving behind a scabby old pair of trainers!

Another guy stole a kayak once, we had club nights that were very busy as you got discounts, someone just picked up a kayak and walked out the shop, think staff even helped open the door for him!

When we lived near Balloch we had quite an amusing breakin. 4 broken windows in the house with quite a lot of blood spattered about.
The broken B&O record player was gone. We found the plug and 6" of cable attached and the huge Kitchen Devil carving knife on the floor with a very large nick in the blade, rainbow scorch marks decorating the blade and molten copper welded to it.

Love to imagine the look on the perp's face when that happened.

They were later sported by neighbours walking the 3 miles back to Balloch across the fields with our telly ( back in the days of CRTs)

I’m sure some bits of Bradford is ok. Are there any?

Bradford district covers quite an area. I used to live on the border between a decent-ish bit (Saltaire) and a somewhat less decent-ish bit (Shipley).

Metal stuff used to vanish from our front yard very readily. I once was late to work because I came down to find someone had swiped my nice new front door handle, including the spindle. It was the only door to the house, so to escape I had to dismantle an internal door to get a spindle to be able to release the mechanism.

Worse, in a way, was a brass frog Mrs TP found in a charity shop which gazed out over the garden from a carefully concealed spot in the front yard. We were having some pointing work done on the house and the builders moved the frog out the firing line of mortar, but sadly into the firing line of thieving gits, and it duly disappeared.

Mrs TP was most hacked off at the frog's loss, and the builders were apologetic, but there wasn't much we could do. The frog was from a charity shop, looked fairly old, and was probably practically unique.

Fast forward something like ten years and a house move to a different part of the country, and Mrs TP asks me to buy her something off eBay as a wedding anniversary present. I say, sure, what is it, and lo and behold, it's the brass frog, being sold by someone in Shipley, and described as having "been in my Mum's house for years". So I bought it, and it's living with us once again, gazing out over the garden -- but from a vantage point inside the window this time.

My brother returned from a train journey to find the local police cutting his bike off the station rails because two lads had said it was theirs and they lost the key... Really...

Had a phone taken whilst on holiday, it was just in a bag next to me...thief had grabbed it while we were sitting there.

Had a Haro BMX robbed while I was riding in Birmingham. Gang of rough kids, one looked to have a gun down his trousers although he never pulled it out. Might have been fake but not taking any chances, got away with just a black eye.

Had loads of run ins with various undesirables working in a petrol station. Plenty of members of a certain community coming in robbing all sorts of stuff and as for the fuel thefts...had all sorts of different attempts. Some successful, some just down right stupid.

Someone tried to swipe the catalytic converter from my car a few weeks ago. Failed though - the subframe got in the way. They just left me with knackered sensors and a sliced exhaust pipe. It's a 20 year old Honda FFS.

CATS for cars of that vintage are fetching very good money.

I've got a 15yr old Civic Type R and people are regularly getting £600-£800 for old CATS. So the metals in them must be worth a lot more.

What is it with shoes!

First: working in London, got very drunk, slept on Waterloo station benches in my suit. Woke up without shoes, had to tramp back to office (3/4 mile in socks). Decided I'd best go home and find another pair.

Second: Last day in Ecuador after a Macmillian cycling thing. Left my only non SPD shoes on the seawall, went drunken (again) skinny dipping in the pacific. Came back no shoes. I mean it was dark, 2am, about 10 of us in teh sea and no one else in sight. And they were only a scabby pair of sandals!

Walked back through Heathrow in bare feet the next day with a massive hangover. No idea how I didn't get the full 'did you pack this bag yourself sir' treatment!

Someone stole a mountain board out of the open boot of my car in the 30s

Clearly a lie. Mountain boards weren't invented. PLUS car boots were well small back then. 😀

I watched my mate's bike get ridden away out of our bike sheds at work. We had 2 sheds and I thought he'd parked in the other one (nearer to where he worked). So as I walked out of the building this scumbag rode right past me. Best thing was it was my mate's first commute as he'd only just bought the bike. I did ride around the local estate looking for any sign, but by the time I'd gone back in, got my key and unlocked my bike, scummer was long gone.

Some people. The mind woggles.

Deserved more recognition 👏

Cycle touring in the early 90's along the south coast 4 of us stopped on Bournmouth seafront to consult the map and decide where to stop for lunch. I'd lent my bike agains the curb and walked back all of 2m to my mate. Then, a local lad decided to nick my bike....

He didn't get far, fully laden bike with panniers etc. a 2m head start me on foot and 3 cyclists already on their bikes. Realising he was not going to get away with this he dropped the bike and ran accross the road and up a side street.

To this day I've no idea how he thought that was going to work.

Friend and I were interrailing around Europe and having missed the last train we slept in out sleeping bags on the station with all our documents and money safely tucked inside the bags against our bodies. I slept fine but my friend woke up at about 3am as he felt his sleeping bag being cut open. He opened his eyes and saw a very sharp knife cutting through the bag across his chest and a guy smiling in his face as he did it.

My friend just lay there while the man took his money, camera and passport. We had to throw the sleeping bag away in the morning, not because of the cut but because my friend actually shit himself.

Sat having a drink in Clumber Park - two lads on mopeds went past and casually loaded my GFs bike on and drove off. I ran at them with a chair and a bloke from Doncaster chased them.

Police put a copter up and several cars.

We got it back later.

i used to work at a Tesco petrol station in my late teens/early twenties. Late evening shifts meant the kiosk door was locked and we had to take payments through the window hatch.

Me and a colleague (both similar ages and got on well) were on shift when a pair of Vauxhall Nova's pulled up to the two pumps farthest from the kiosk. We sat and watched in awe as two young, skinny females got out and started filling up. Both had caps on low, along with low waisted jeans with underwear poking out of the top. You know the ones that replicate dental floss.

Whilst mesmerised by such a sight, looking forward to the prospect of interaction with these fine young ladies, what we didn't spot were their partners sliding across from passenger to driver seat. The girls hung up the nozzles, jumped into the passenger side and we watched them light up the front tyres and leave the forecourt.

By the time we had worked out what was going on, they were half a mile up the road.

CCTV camera's were super low resolution back then, so no chance of working out the number plates.

they played the game well.

incredible stuff.

Some blokes took a pinball machine away in a cafe/bar I used to frequent on Cuba Street in Wellington (many years ago). Bride of Pinbot if anybody is interested. They walked in wearing hi-vis, asked the staff where it was and then casually loaded it onto the back of the truck.

I had my bike taken from inside my kitchen in a town house was inside a electronically gated car park whilst I slept upstairs. ***ts

I watched someone in a convertable sat in a traffic jam on the Pariferique (SP?) have their mobile phone they were using stolen by the pillion on a moped. Just lent over and grabbed it. Perfect execution.

Some people. The mind woggles.

Deserved more recognition 👏

Think you mean deserves a badge for that...

[pi]Some blokes took a pinball machine away in a cafe/bar I used to frequent on Cuba Street in Wellington (many years ago). Bride of Pinbot if anybody is interested. They walked in wearing hi-vis, asked the staff where it was and then casually loaded it onto the back of the truck.[/i]

At Portsmouth Student Union they had some guys come in and 'collect' three fruit machines and a pinball machine.

After a few weeks the replacements arrived but the next day some blokes explained the wrong ones had been delivered so took the new ones back.

6 machine stolen in one month, all with full assistance from the Student Union staff.

6 machine stolen in one month, all with full assistance from the Student Union staff.

Wasn't uncommon for shop staff to hold the door open for someone walking out with a bike. They'd assume it was going out on test ride.

We did once have a guy try to rob the till. Quiet time in the shop, he picked the youngest female member of staff and bought something small like a puncture repair kit and as she opened the till, he tried to reach over and grab cash.
The noise alerted the armed response officer that I was serving in the next room (the bike shop was laid out across multiple dividing walls) and there was a swiftly resolved crime! 🙂

Back in the 90's we had to jump off a night bus in Hackney coz wifes friend had puked into her hat, only to be confronted with a guy nicking a car stereo, we politely crossed to the other side of the street.

Lost a few petrol gennys working on building sites drilling or sawing away then nothing no power.
Gone they cut the cable on the last one as my mate super glued the 110v leads into the Genny

Someone smashed Mrs F’s car window so they could steal the out of date tax disc. I worked in a ladies clothing warehouse years ago and was locking up one night. Went to check the toilets and opened the door to find a man with his trousers around his ankles. He was halfway through pulling up a pair of ladies leggings!

Plumber I used to work with was feeding copper pipe through a hole in the wall to the next room. By the time he’d walked round there someone had cut it off and nicked it.
Brickie put his partner saw down on the scaffold, turned round to pick up a brick, turned back and the saw had gone. No sign of anyone around either!

I've accidentally stolen a tank of petrol, just filled up and drove off forgetting to pay until later that day and the police popped around and reminded me.

I've also twice awoken to tinkering noises in my sleep that I thought were part of a dream, first time was our neighbours car being pushed off the drive - I assumed it was being collected by a garage and went back to bed only to find later on it was being stolen. I had to then tell my neighbour I'd watched it go! Second was sounds of our car starting up and really quietly driving off. I thought it was the wife but found her in the spare room with our newborn son, they'd popped the front door and grabbed the keys and taken the car. On the plus side they walked right past 3k in cash I had ready to go to buy a T4.

Somebody tried to steal a friend’s helmet at Brixton skatepark. He was wearing it at the time!!

There was a spate of that at Richmond Park – scenario was that a cyclist (actually dressed properly, looked the part) was having a coffee at the cafe there keeping an eye on what was coming and going and he’d spot something he liked the look of, finish his coffee and casually saunter over to the rack, get the bike and go. About 500m away was a van, parked up in one of the car parks and he’d ride to that, pop it in the back.

I was talking to someone who works in RP at the weekend and he said this is a massive issue now.

Brickie put his partner saw down on the scaffold, turned round to pick up a brick, turned back and the saw had gone. No sign of anyone around either!

Nobody saw that one coming.

😀

I had a mates bike in my garage while I was doing something with his cranks, I was also running my petrol station. While I was in the shop serving someone, an associate came round the back, went in the garage & nicked mateys bike.
I rang around some lads I knew (2 of them were dodgy anyway) & within minutes 1 of them called back & told me who’d nicked the bike. I then called my mate who went & found the scrote lurking with his mates in a nearby village, mate threatened him with a fate worse than death if he didn’t get it back & said he’d wait there for it, 20 minutes later, hey presto.

My 1st car got stolen. Scrotes opened door by sticking an implement through the letter box, came in and took keys off the coffee table and made off while I was upstairs. Took my grampa mobile on a joy ride, did some burgaling, used stolen credit cards in a petrol station and then burned it out. They actually got done for it in the end and jailed, as the police got their faces easy enough but linking when the credit cards were used to the garage CCTV.

Absolutely brazen but thick as ****. I *think* what attracted them to my house was the neighbour had a porsche and the driveways were a bit unclear which was which. Instead they got a 75bhp shed. I had to replace the door locks and car insurance went astronomical. It easily cost me £1200 in cash over a couple of years.

Knew a guy who had his microwave stolen out of his kitchen whilst he was watching the telly in the other room. It still had his dinner in it.

Was quite common when I was a kid for the fag machines to be knicked from pubs and clubs, whilst they were open as well.

Another guy I knew had his mom's car stolen off the drive whilst a party was on inside. They had to move some cars out the way in order to knick it. No body noticed until later on.

Also a pall at T in the park who had his wallet knicked whilst he slept in his tent. The wallet was inside his jeans which were rolled up and being used as a pillow at the time.

People are absolutely brazen.

This sort of stuff stops me from having blinging looking bikes. I tend to leave them a bit dirty too to try to deter thieves.