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You know, the one where a woman posts on Facebook That she’s just climbed the Eiger Nordwand in winter and 90% of the comments from women are on the lines of “how beautiful you look”. It starts when girls are still in their cots that folk, usually women, tell them how beautiful they look and it goes downhill from there.
No one else has picked up on this so I thought I would. 🙂
Definitely something in this and it chimes with some of my concerns about gender identity. I've worked in a few schools with large numbers of transgender pupils. Nothing wrong with that at all but they are overwhelmingly female to male. Obviously there's lots of stuff at work there like the levels of stigma with transitioning in different directions. However, based on the number of female-male transitions I wonder if a lot of these young people are not actually transgender men but women that don't feel they fit into the very narrow definition of femininity our society still offers. Basically, if you're not a girly girl where do you fit in? And if you're not a pretty, girly girl then a lot of the messaging girls are seeing might lead them to conclude they're transgender when in fact the reality might be that they are women but just not stereo-typically.
Edit: Basically what I'm saying is that there are many ways to be a woman... how woke am I? 🙂
Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact.
... in your opinion.
Basically what I’m saying is that there are many ways to be a woman… how woke am I?
Only Shania Twain knows for sure what is is to feel like a woman
Hard times create strong men.
Strong men create good times.
Good times create weak men.
Weak men create hard times.
You are Laurence Fox and I claim my £5.
I am naturally stoic, I find it very useful in as much as just being able to get on with things, but it does make me come across as rather cold.
I recently started a charity, working with people I never would encounter before. I find it bizarre how often people tell you their problems e.g try arrange a zoom call and you don't get 'sorry I can't make it' you get endless insights into cahotic lives. I do think a bit of stocism would go a long way, but maybe I have not suffered the same.
It is fine to use the common colloquial meaning of stoicism but the philosophical definition is much more interesting, IMO.
I find it bizarre how often people tell you their problems e.g try arrange a zoom call and you don’t get ‘sorry I can’t make it’ you get endless insights into cahotic lives.
'Oversharing' type behaviour is often rooted in things like ADHD, bipolar, trauma etc. Also, one person's oversharing is another person's 'making deeper connections'.
I can see how some might think the balance has tipped too far towards talking about everything but it's far healthier than the opposite, IMO.
Since toxic masculinity has been mentioned and as it’s my birthday (in April) I thought I’d mention toxic femininity.
Isn't that still just toxic masculinity?
Stoicism is one thing.
Living in a society where you are discouraged from expressing feelings ****S people up (men more than women).
Over sharing is a good term for it, it often strikes me as quite self indulgent and just very impractical as nearly every conversation turns into variations of 'so sorry to hear that'. Everyone has challenges, but volunteering is completely optional..
I do worry how fragile so many people seem, out of 30 or so core volunteers there are probably only 3 or 4 uncomplicated people that you can rely on not matter what.
Can't help but feeling you're in the wrong job @g5604
I wonder what you expected. And I wonder why you started the charity in the first place.
Sorry for sounding critical but I can't help but feel you come over as rather superior as well as cold. And while those involved with charities often genuinely want to make a difference to other people's lives, it's also often the case that they are getting as much out of it as those they are helping although different needs might be being met.
Just a thought.
I was talking candidly, I am very patient and understanding in practice.
I do worry how fragile so many people seem, out of 30 or so core volunteers there are probably only 3 or 4 uncomplicated people that you can rely on not matter what.
Many people are finding things a bit of a struggle at the moment. I suspect many of those people have other strengths even if personal organisation isn't one of them.
People do volunteer to help manage their own mental health/sense of worth etc, and often will have been motivated to help others by struggles of their own. Try not to judge.
Everyone has challenges, but volunteering is completely optional..
They're trying to make it work. Giving up may be a blow. I know people can be frustrating but you do seem a little lacking in empathy tbh.
I totally get all of that, it's more an observation of how many people are struggling and also how rare stocism now is. I am very aware that I can come across as lacking in empathy, but actually I am also the person that goes out of they way to make things as easy as possible for everyone else, because I hate to see people struggle.
Diogenes was a cynic. Don't mix up your dead greeks.
IdleJon
The barrel is there, but I don’t know his story well enough to know what it is with the dogs and lighting a lantern in daytime?
something to do with wandering around the market in daylight with a lantern looking for an honest man...or was it a wise man. Can't remember now!
You are Laurence Fox and I claim my £5.
Laurence Fox is the perfect stoic... Till something goes wrong
(Sorry Rob Newmann said something very similar first)
My mum was a social worker back in the 90s. She was full of empathy and understanding and very open. Her team included an ex Regimental Sargent Major who was definitely not into showing his emotions but had plenty of empathy and was very good at solving problems e.g. making the system re-house people at risk. The team worked well because of the different personalities working to their strengths.