[Closed] Splitting the bill.

Go on, admit it, your keys weren't picked out of the fruit bowl.

Or maybe they were.

wtf?
£3.00 per head to be your friend?
I'm in Paypal gift?

I don't mind it but have you noticed the person who always suggests splitting the bill is the person who ate and drank the most.

I'm happy to do either but what would annoy me is their refusal to pay towards a tip (if the food and service deserves one).

When out with a large group (normally from my other halfs work) I always pay an extra £10 towards a tip knowing that others won't ... Somehow the money is always still short, I suspect it's always the same person who doesn't pay!

I can sort o sympathise with people getting the arse on when a friend won't pay their way although in our friend group, we're pretty easy going so it would never be a real issue..

But getting the arse on because a friend won't pay [i]your[/i] way!?

That's some next level ****ed up shit 😯

You need to ditch the tight arses. Gets on my tits. Groups of women especially bad for this, having been the waiter providing arithmetical support to pissed up girls/tightwads nights out I can tell you its tedious squared.

Are they that good company, tbh not tipping staff at all is pretty mean, restarant staff aren't well paid and rely on tips. As for your mate who tucks away the beers he should be paying for those.

If I am out for a meal with other folks it always boils my piss if I feel that I have to make choices in order to avoid offence. Therefore if I know I have had a couple of extra drinks or more expensive course (enjoy a nice brandy and steak 🙂 ) I will always put in enough to cover that plus approx 15% extra towards a tip (if deserved).

Luckily money is not too tight atm so I can afford this. If I was counting every penny things might be different.

If I was staying with someone else and we went to dinner I would offer to pay their share as a thank you for their hospitality (unless it was a regular reciprocal arrangement).

You need to ditch the tight arses.

Tightness in these circumstances really annoys me, especially with tips.
Fair enough if you're skint/on a tight budget, don't split, pay for your own. No problem. Defo seems to be worse among groups of women for some reason. Can also be witnessed in work outings. Someone expecting to pay the same for their three courses/6 drinks as the water drinking salad eater deserves food poisoning! As for everyone having paid an equal share then it still being short..

They are driving a brand new car so not on the bread line.
It's these people..
http://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/guests-arrive-tonight

The drinkers should split the drink bill, and the eaters split the food bill.

Everyone should chip in for the tip.

It's not rocket science. They are just tight arses.

Charge them keep next time they stay with ye.

Mrs Zip buggered off with another friend for a spa day on Monday so that was definitely me on a bike all day.
She has realised what a drippy pair they are and i feel this may be the last visit.

That didn't work out as you'd hoped then 😆

@zippy so the signs where there 2 years ago ! Time to move, just tell Mrs Z you don't want them back

Everybody should put in what they think they've had then split the shortfall equally.

restarant staff aren't well paid and rely on tips.

Is this really true in modern day uk? We are not the states with waiting staff on $2 per hour and the anticipated tips calculated in to get them up to minimum wage. With the advent of the living wage (for 25 year olds at least) should we really be tipping by default? I don't know about you, but I don't spend my life topping up every other person's wage only on the living wage in my day to day life, so why do we single out waiting staff? A 25 year old waiter on the living wage plus an average nights share of the tips in an average restaurant is on more than a recently qualified nurse per hour (and not taxed on the tips) - is that really equitable?

Re splitting the bill - defiantly should be normal. However, I'm always concious of the friend who wants to come (& we want them to come) but just can barely justify spending out on the cheapest thing on the menu let alone subsidising the tosser at the other end of the table choosing the most expensive thing on the menu and necking booze by the gallon without the social awareness to appreciate the difficultly they could be putting others into. Over consuming on a split bill without chipping in the extra is a bigger social gaff than not wanting to split the bill imo.

Oh, and we tend to insist we pay the whole bill if people are coming to stay and we choose to take them out rather than eat at home - seems really cheap to invite people and then expect them to pay for their own grub, especially if they've travelled a distance to be with us.

Edit - I stand corrected on previous post. In the uk restaurant income through tips should now be taxed. I'm sure they weren't in my day, but then again there was no minimum wage either.

On tipping
http://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/entry/pittsburgh-restaurant-no-tips_us_562677c6e4b02f6a900e03dc?section=australia
One of the issues raised was where do your tips go? To the waiting staff? To the minimum wage pot washer in the kitchen? To the people doing the prep? The upshot of this one was that when you accept that you should pay responisbly people respect that. It's nice in some ways not to be in a massive tipping/guilt tipping culture. I'll choose to eat somewhere that pays it's staff properly.
As for the OP, some mates pay what they had, others have more and insist on splitting - both annoy you?

They won't pay a tip.

It doesn't matter if the staff need the money to make up their wages, tipping waiting staff is pretty much the norm if the service has been friendly and good.

Also, just split the bill in as many ways as there are dinners. simple and straightforward. Don't go dining with people how don't understand this.

So they come to visit with you for 2 weeks at a time for free and then get arsey about bills and tipping?

Give them a bill at the end of their visit for the accommodation, with a service charge attached and a moaning tightwad supplement.

You won't see them again.

If I am out for a meal with other folks it always boils my piss if I feel that I have to make choices in order to avoid offence. Therefore if I know I have had a couple of extra drinks or more expensive course (enjoy a nice brandy and steak ) I will always put in enough to cover that plus approx 15% extra towards a tip (if deserved).

Oooh so as a special favour, you pay for what you've eaten and drunk, well done you! 😉

As a non drinker, I know exactly what I've spent. It's always the drinkers, who 'forget' how much they've drunk (or are too pissed to remember) that want to split the bill. I put in what I've spent, I don't see why I should be expected to subsidise everyone else's boozing.

Paying your share is fine as long as you add 10% for the tip. If not, then you're not paying your share (unless the service has been bad enough that no-one is paying a tip).

Splitting a bill equally can be a bit ridiculous when a large drinking meat eater will have spent two or three times as much as a skinny teetotal vegetablist.

What's up with you southerners ? Up north you don't pay tips !

Edit - just re read. They don't drink and they didn't have starters, why should they subsidise YOUR meal??? Not good friends are you if you can't see that they should pay less.

Besides which they live in Hull so you should feel sorry for them

I can't bear people who try and wheedle. Be a kin grown up and pay for your own habits and whatever it is you want. People who see others as potential meal tickets cannot expect to be treated as equals and taken seriously. If a mate genuinely couldn't pay I'd rather give them a bung on the quiet so they could 'pay their own way'.
Restaurant near me, the tips don't seem to get to all the staff. What to do? I knew some dockers, celebrating a legal victory, who ate in Langan's Brasserie. They gathered up a big tip, barged through the swing doors and asked a chef (who happened to be a little black guy) if he ever saw any tips, 'never'. They gave him the lot and then got chucked out. Best way to end a night in that place.

I'm a southerner, and rarely tip. 😉

Anyway, as a non-drinker splitting the bill can be a pain. I don't mind if someone's food is more, but when the bill is 60:40 or more food to booze, I do begrudge splitting. I'd have thought the solution would be to order separately. Would solve the problem, and you wouldn't lose some friends just as they prefer to not split.

Edit: Just re:read they're stopping at yours. I'd have thought they should pay outright one night at least for that.

Also, just split the bill in as many ways as there are dinners. simple and straightforward. Don't go dining with people how don't understand this.

This ^^. Our riding group just chucks a tenner in at the start of a ride for bacon butties/tea etc and then another one if we run out of cash in the pub. My view is it works out in the long term, and even if it didn't I just don't care. Same for trips away, etc - just takes the hassle out of it.

Loving the 2 year old post reference, brilliant research so hope the OP appreciates that.
It's simple to pay your share plus a tip if the 'group view' is to tip. Anyone who expects to do differently probably isn't great friend material in my world (this is not a major criteria to gain my friendship but indicative they may fall generally short).

If you don't stop at theirs 'for free' then I'd expect them to offer to pay for dinner or similar by way of a thank you gesture.

Invoice them for the two weeks BnB.

They sound awful. Get rid and tell them why.

I've known it take an hour just to pay the bill because of one particular couple in my friendship group insisting on everyone paying for exactly what they had. It just ruins the evening. That couple don't get invited anymore. It's meant to be shared social experience, not a mental arithmetic test.

http://singletrackmag.com/forum/topic/guests-arrive-tonight

Ahh, the drippy people ,what are you doing going out for dinner with them again?

I split the bill and I tip.

Next time your wife suggests meeting up with them , I would politely decline.
You could say you'd be busy sorting out your sock drawer. Or something.

There is a squad we go out with (usually about xmas time). The meal is always paid for in advance but t they always shout for a kitty for drinks.
It used to start at £30 per couple. So prob £150 at a time. 6 of them drink wine/champagne/proseco like it goes out of fashion! 4 of us are bottled beer drinkers. We'd be lucky to get 2 drinks each and the kitty tin would need filled up to pay for another round of "fizz"
Sharp kicked that into touch!
Was on holiday a few years ago, with sis/brother in law and 2 kids, my dad and me/wife and 1 baby. First meal, BIL says are we splitting this 3 ways, dad had had a €6 burger and the bill was €90. He's one of the wine drinkers!

I dont and wont split the bill

I am a teetotal vegan so my meal will always be the cheaper. Essentially every time i eat out in a group i have to pay for others food and drink
If you want to explain why this is fair I am happy to have yet another discussion on the topic from those who want my subsidy for their night out.

If i was staying at mates might be a nice bottle of wine or some such as thanks

Anyone who expects to do differently probably isn't great friend material in my world

As for the lack of maths skills that is not my problem I can work out what my bill is as I am not dumb and still sober 😉

For me what happened is we went out with a couple who ordered steak then drank two bottles of wine then wanted to split the bill the It was a long time ago so about £20 for two meals or about £50 splitting.

You think we should have paid the extra £30?

I will happily split the bill with a couple of our close friends, but beyond that, not anymore! My wife and I have been on the receiving end of having to pay out way more than we ate/drank to subsidise the people that suggested splitting and then drank/ate loads!

I find making things clear at the start of the evening avoids any potential problems later on! It is the same with buying rounds, I used to be fine with it, when i went out drinking regularly with the same group of friends, but now I am much happier just buying my own drinks when I want them.

Sadly we all know a "taker", out once in company, I ordered a steak his Mrs was heard to say "he`s getting steak make sure you do" plus his extra double malts in between normal rounds that apparently he likes to do, face was a picture when everyone started putting in their own corners worth, think they just had enough coin to cover their greed and had to go home 🙂
You can do me once , maybe twice but never ever again, always cover what we have had plus a tip judged on the service provided.

Have a referendum and let your friends leave if they think they're subsidising you by splitting the bill 🙂

I'm generally OK with friends, it's the work meal that does my nut in as there always is the heavy drinker who can drink upto the value of my entire meal and expect me to heftily subsidise their alcohol habit.

Why do people bother with all this nonsense with people they don't even like? Just bin 'em off!

In my experience the people who do this whole totting up exercise at the end of the meal are generally the ones who earn far more than anyone else at the table.

They're just tight-arses! Pure and simple. Just tell 'em to **** off! Seriously. I would. Life's too short to bother with this type of nonsense

I am a teetotal vegan

I imagine the offers must be flooding in.
[img] [/img]
😉

My experience is that when eating out socially and splitting the bill it strangely never adds up, so i always make sure that I've got an extra £20 in a pocket to put into the pile because I can't cope with the nit-picking and "who had fired rice?" repercussions.
I used to regularly meet up with a couple of friends and have a couple of beers with them before going for a meal, out of the last 3 times i paid for 2 and the last time we "agreed" to split 50/50 between 3... I haven't met up with them since as I got a bit sick of it.

I find making things clear at the start of the evening avoids any potential problems later on! It is the same with buying rounds, I used to be fine with it, when i went out drinking regularly with the same group of friends, but now I am much happier just buying my own drinks when I want them.

Wow... it sounds like you have some pretty wild nights out.. Once you've 'made things clear at the start of the evening', do you get everyone to sign a legal disclaimer saying that they have understood and agreed to the terms and conditions?

😆

In my experience the people who do this whole totting up exercise at the end of the meal are generally the ones who earn far more than anyone else at the table.

Nah its the one who can eat more than most drink more than most and get louder than most at bill time as they are half cocked already....remind you of anyone yet?

Is it everyone other than the teetotal vegan? 😉

As always, the incisive social commentary of Friends tackled this issue.

touche binners 😆

Had this on Friday night. Dinner for 15. Everyone had a starter and main apart from two. The two that didn't had a couple of cocktails which no one else did. some folk had wine, some didn't. Some had a couple of beers more than the rest. Either way, it all would have been pretty much equal. I said lets just split it evenly...

However they insisted on passing the receipt around the table and everyone tallying up what they had and only contributing that. It was painful.

teeth gnashingly irritating isn't it. You're paying for a night out, not your shopping in Aldi!

As an aside, may I recommend Splitwise.

https://www.splitwise.com/index

thestabiliser - Member - Quote
teeth gnashingly irritating isn't it. You're paying for a night out, not your shopping in Aldi!

1995

We go on our first lads holiday to benidorm.

We go to the big supermarket to stock up on booze and food

Instead of splitting the bill, the most boring fart in our group insists on going through the receipt item by item and putting each persons initials next to items they bought then tallying up each person's individual liability. 😆

A few years later I shared a flat with him and the theme continued

I'd have DEFINITELY opened his crisps the minute we'd got back to the apartment!

A few years back, in a dodgy karaoke place, with 8 couples and two single females it came to bill splitting time.

Quick look at the blli said it split evenly among the pairs , so the price was announced in the drunken moment, and one of the single females got all arsey and said she wasn't paying for the wives and girlfriends.

So we just paid up, headed to our ride home, which she tried to get into and was promptly told by the driver that she surely couldn't ride back with us as it had been paid for by all the couple's.

Her mate, our mate as well, hopped in, looked at pariah stood there and told her she had better start walking, gave the carpark attendant a hefty tip and we left.

Their friendship didn't last long, they shared an apartment together.

Not sure why you are so irked by my choices Binners!

I have known my circle of friends for a long time, and thankfully all of us trust each other well enough, that we can be honest when strapped for cash (or saving up for things) and so no one takes offence.

As for wild nights out, not sure what your definition is there. In my 20's I used to do that, but as I grew up I found that at the weekend I want to enjoy my time with my wife and children, not nursing a hangover and a depleted bank account!

ALl I did in my post was to state my experience and choice! Clearly if you are happy to subsidise the drinking/food costs of others you may well have a large collection of people happy to go out for the evening with you.

No person is out eating our out drinking Binners on a night out
Its basically his way of redistributing wealth

I do get the point being made but[s] every single time[/s] both times I eat out I will be the one whose stuff cost the least

Not sure why you are so irked by my choices Binners!

I'm not. You sound a very well ordered individual who has prioritised aspects of your life, and will not be deflected from them no matter what. All admirable character traits.

Just as an aside: do you find you enjoy the formulation of spreadsheets?

No person is out eating our out drinking Binners on a night out

You've clearly never met my mates!

You didn't come on the MNPR christmas do, did you? I had some serious competition!!! 😯

What works for me is to always try to pay a bit extra if I've had more than an equal share. Really, a social meal out with friends, it's just not worth squabbling over a couple of quid - most of us paid more than that in petrol to get there, or gave each other lifts etc. Conveniently, my wife generally has a bit less than her share and I have a bit more, so it usually works out fairly even anyway. No-one takes the piss so it works out fine (um...unless everyone else is grumbling about us behind our backs).

junkyard - you sound like a whole heap of fun to go out with, jesus! FUN POLICE

we went out sat night, close group of friends, all drink, all eat (one of the group had a sausage fest which was dearer than the rest), he also drunk pints rather than the ladies bottles/halfs

did any one moan?! No, we were out having fun, not tit for tat over a few drinks/quid, its a night out, if your struggling for cash don't go out for a meal or explain beforehand, don't sit there counting your pennies out of your moth ridden wallet 🙄

junkyard - you sound like a whole heap of fun to go out with, jesus! FUN POLICE

we went out sat night, close group of friends, all drink, all eat (one of the group had a sausage fest which was dearer than the rest), he also drunk pints rather than the ladies bottles/halfs

did any one moan?! No, we were out having fun, not tit for tat over a few drinks/quid, its a night out, if your struggling for cash don't go out for a meal or explain beforehand, don't sit there counting your pennies out of your moth ridden wallet

Wow...

I'm really pleased that all my mates are nice and genuine. I honestly never have any of the above issues.

Usually the only arguments we have have is because someone is trying to pay too much. Usually my BIL, who will have a few drinks but as he's always the first to put his hand in his pocket anyway we'll always just tell him we'll split the bill equally.

While we are kvetching about etiquette and socialising - can I add my petty peeve - couples who think only one of them has to buy a round in the pub ??

For example - out with two couples. I buy a round. One of couple A buys a round. One of couple B buys a round. They then start looking at me again.

Flatmate of mine at Uni was a bit of an binge drinker. She was always after people to go halvers on a cask of wine with her (2 litres). A mistake a person only made once.

A university friend of mine took me to one side and asked me if I'd lend him £20 so he could come out to the pub with us. "Of course! Here you go."

He waited until everyone else had bought a round then said he was tired and went home with the fresh £20 still in his pocket 🙂

Actually he might also still owe me for some drugs I might have bought him in about 1998.

He's a police firearms officer now. Seriously.

While we are kvetching about etiquette and socialising - can I add my petty peeve - couples who think only one of them has to buy a round in the pub ??

For example - out with two couples. I buy a round. One of couple A buys a round. One of couple B buys a round. They then start looking at me again.

True. But then again we have long term 'spinster' friends who manage to dip under the radar completely with couples doing the buying.

While we are at it, why is it always the bloke from the relationship that does the queuing and buying the rounds? I think in our crowd it's this factor that gets the single ladies off the hook.

As a younger/poorer man I often lost out to the big drinkers but didn't really mind, one day it was pointed out that I'd had a more expensive meal than the others so I should contribute more - was miffed at that.

Once went to Brugges with a largish group and a few of us picked up the bills on our cards on differnt evenings as easiest and everyone would settle up later. One of us was an accountant and she wrote down what everyone drank so everyone could pay their right amount. I was surprised/amused but some didn't drink much so fair really.

Because you tolerate sexism in so many aspects of society ? I always buy my round, for the record, and I am 5ft tall so can barely reach the bar. Sometimes I take a wee stepladder.

So glad none of our friends are anywhere like some of the people described on here. The only problem we ever have is trying to insist on paying, rather than letting someone else pay. And we're well aware that some of our friends might not have the means to pay for stuff, so we just ask them to cook us a nice dinner or something at theirs in return. What goes around comes around, and we've never really had any issues.

While we are at it, why is it always the bloke from the relationship that does the queuing and buying the rounds? I think in our crowd it's this factor that gets the single ladies off the hook.

That is sexism and you need to call people out on it.

- you sound like a whole heap of fun to go out with, jesus! FUN POLICE

Again every single meal my bill will be the least why should I subsidise every single meal I go to ?

Always the same ****ers trying to make it out like you are "bad" for refusing to pay for them to have fun.

Ps I need a new tyre what say we split the bill?

"Sometimes I take a wee stepladder."

Some of those urinals are really quite high.

You jest - but have you seen some of those disabled toilets ?

There seems to be a pleasant undertone to these types of thread. If you don't go with the crowd and buy rounds/split evens you are penny pinching/spreadsheet lover!

As I said above, I am happy to split with close friends, but work colleagues etc can get stuffed! The loud boorish types who drink far too much can get uppity but they are generally just moaning because they actually have to pay for what they have consumed!

I spend my money wisely, to me that means I have more money to spend on things that are really important, like my family! £50 for a night out does not equal the fun I can have with my children with £30, and then only spend £20 on my night out! That is always the way that sum goes in my head!

lets do dinner then. Actually sod it lets just save time - what say a tenner gift to your paypal account should cover my contribution to your fun. Have as much "fun" as you wish just dont expect me to pay for it as its your "fun"

Again every single meal my bill will be the least why should I subsidise every single meal I go to ?

Always the same **** trying to make it out like you are "bad" for refusing to pay for them to have fun.

Are you pitching to be Social Security Minister in Leadsom's government ? The extreme right of the Conservative party would love someone with those sentiments to be in charge of reforming taxation and welfare payments.

Unless it is just your own money you are precious about ?

Again every single meal my bill will be the least why should I subsidise every single meal I go to ?

I have a big diesel 4x4 that is used to ferry friends around, friends have smaller more efficient cars in which I am occasionally ferried. Should I charge them more? Should I charge them anything??? 🙄

A mate came round to watch the F1 yesterday, how much leccy should I charge? And should I charge for the hospitality beer an crisps that were consummed?

Where does it end?

Are you pitching to be Social Security Minister in Leadsom's government ? The extreme right of the Conservative party would love someone with those sentiments to be in charge of reforming taxation and welfare payments.

Unless it is just your own money you are precious about ?

Please tell me this is irony.

Because if you can't see the difference between paying for your friend's beer, or ensuring that the poor aren't forced into homelessness and malnutrition, then...

phil40 - Member
I spend my money wisely, to me that means I have more money to spend on things that are really important, like my family! £50 for a night out does not equal the fun I can have with my children with £30, and then only spend £20 on my night out! That is always the way that sum goes in my head!

Pfft! Thats not going to go far on coke and hookers, is it? No matter how many variables you include in the spreadsheet?

I am all for splitting the bill equally, so much easier, but after a couple of experiences always keep an eye out for the guy who has ordered the cheapest and drunk only soft drinks. Why should they pay steak and lobster prices for a simple meal? Establish the rules before you order, they may be financially strapped, who am I to empty their wallet for them?

A couple we go out with are perfectly happy to split the bill, but we occasionally go to a place with a fixed price menu, so it should be straightforward? No, she without fail, will order the king prawn starter and main course which requires a supplement over the fixed menu!

Rounds of drinks? Two lads I used to drink with were consumers of bulk Guinness. They appreciated that not everybody could keep up, nor indeed wanted to, so they established a system. Always first to the bar, they would order four pints for themselves and whatever anybody else wanted. They'd knock the top off their first pint while the round was being poured, and bring their second two pints to the table with them. We mortals would be about halfway down our first pint as they were finishing their second, and they'd then get themselves another while waiting for us to finish. They would then accept a pint each from the next round and then repeat as necessary. Trying to keep up with them was suicide, as well as cripplingly expensive, and they recognised this.

Are you pitching to be Social Security Minister in Leadsom's government ? The extreme right of the Conservative party would love someone with those sentiments to be in charge of reforming taxation and welfare payments.

Unless it is just your own money you are precious about ?

Would you like to try and address the points I made or just throw out cheap insults?

some proper tightwads out there

I have a big diesel 4x4 that is used to ferry friends around, friends have smaller more efficient cars in which I am occasionally ferried. Should I charge them more? Should I charge them anything???

Imagine you and your mate buy a bike each

Theirs was 1 k more than yours are you gonna give them half as you both ride together?

"Why should they pay steak and lobster prices for a simple meal? Establish the rules before you order, they may be financially strapped, who am I to empty their wallet for them?"

This. Real friends would be sensitive about others' possible financial situation and constraints, and would behave accordingly. We are well aware of which of our friends can or can't afford stuff, so it's all about everyone else chipping in to help friends out. What's wrong with that?

" Actually sod it lets just save time - what say a tenner gift to your paypal account should cover my contribution to your fun. Have as much "fun" as you wish just dont expect me to pay for it as its your "fun""

Are you only having a starter then?

[b]always keep an eye out for the guy who has ordered the cheapest and drunk only soft drinks. Why should they pay steak and lobster prices for a simple meal?[/[/b]

THIS

and from having this debate it just gets more unpleasant as the indulgent think I should ay for their choices

see that bit where sometimes you pay and sometimes they pay. In this case you always want me to pay. Its not swings and roundabouts.

see that bit where sometimes you pay and sometimes they pay. In this case you always want me to pay. Its not swings and roundabouts.

Theirs was 1 k more than yours are you gonna give them half as you both ride together?