[Closed] Son in hospital in a coma

I feel for you. I hope things go well.

One step at a time to the right result, thoughts still with you and the family

He's getting a bit better. The ICP remains low, and the O2 is down to 35%. They tried warming him up a bit on Monday but that didn't work, but on Tuesday they had another go and he's now a touch over 36C. As a result they've now also been able to turn off the paralysis drug (which was to stop him shivering it seems) and they've also turned down the adrenalin.

Really upsettingly though, another pupil at the same school he went to (but in the year below) has done the same thing (albeit at a different place) and this time been successful.

I had to force myself to reply.. it's a horrible thing you're going through and I can only echo the words already expressed. I'm really pleased to hear the progress your son is making, long may it continue, my thoughts are with you.

I'm sorry to hear about the other lad, I don't know what else to say

All progress is good news.
I keep dropping in for little up dates, when you have the time and or need to say something.
Love and hope mate.

I'm sure there's lots of us following the thread and popping in for updates but don't really know what to say 😕

oldnpastit, thoughts with you, your boy and your family.

Op thanks for the update, terrible news about the other lad. Possibly this may help you see that in your lad's situation there is hope.

I'm pleased to hear there is some progress. All moving in the right direction.
The good thing about you posting is I'm sure it has got a lot of people talking, not just online but outside too. For a subject which is kept so quiet and behind closed doors, it can only be a positive.

I was talking to a lovely new nurse today. It's just chilling though when they tell you how it's going to be.

Me: "So, do you think he'll be out of the coma sometime next week".
Her: "Oh no, I expect he'll be in it for quite some time."
...
...
Her: "Your lives are going to change. Not as much as his, but they're going to change."

I've now got a kind of sick heavy weight in my stomach and my legs don't seem to work properly anymore.

Deep breath. And breath out.

oldnpastit - You are very brave and I wish you all the luck in the future for the whole family.

What an awful shock for you.

bunnyhop x

I simply cannot imagine the pain you and your son and family are going through. Thoughts from my whole family to you and yours and i hope that the situation continues to improve bit by bit.
Ash

I've now got a kind of sick heavy weight in my stomach and my legs don't seem to work properly anymore.

I know the feeling very well. Don't get ahead of yourself. It's impossible not to think about what the future might bring but try not to dwell on either the positive or negative scenarios. Taking little steps only when they're needed makes things a bit more manageable.

im quite lost for words on this thread, and I'm sure there is nothing new I can add.

My thoughts are with you, take care fella.

Look after yourselves, what a massive thing to digest. Take care.

Best wishes

I've now got a kind of sick heavy weight in my stomach and my legs don't seem to work properly anymore.

I know the feeling very well. Don't get ahead of yourself. It's impossible not to think about what the future might bring but try not to dwell on either the positive or negative scenarios. Taking little steps only when they're needed makes things a bit more manageable.

I can only echo muppetWrangler. Take care of yourself oldnpastit.

I wish there was something useful I could do, but obviously there isn't.

Thoughts and ears are with you, but as the many here who don't know what to say, we are here if you ask the questions.

Man hugs etc x

We invest so much time/love/stress/emotion in our kids, i can't imagine how it must feel when life dumps this on you.
It sounds like you are doing a great job in impossible circumstances - stay strong and take each day as it comes.

As for recovery time - you need to start thinking in months rather than days/weeks i'm afraid.

I love the staff that work in neuro intensive care units, or indeed all intensive care units. They have a wonderfully no nonsense way of telling you how things are going to be. If only the rest of the world worked like that.

Just seen this thread for the first time. Know you are a long term poster on here, and though I don't know you I have always known you were one of the regular people who make STW the special, opinionated and knowledgeable place that it is.
I don't have anything useful to add, other than the thoughts and best wishes that any other parent would send to you, your son and your family.
Best wishes from Leeds.

All my hopes O.P.

Not been on the forum for a bit so missed this when you posted it oldn. What can I say - ****...

My thoughts are with you I hope you get all the support you, you son and the rest of your family need and deserve.

My wife has just come back (I've been attempting to work today). Had a long very scary talk from the consultants. They've now turned off all of the sedation and are attempting to get him to respond to stimulus, which he does to some extent.

GCS (Glasgow Coma Scale, which I didn't even know existed until a few days ago) is now put at 3.

About to go in.

Best of luck fella, thinking of you and yours...

Good luck to you and your boy.

I've now got a kind of sick heavy weight in my stomach and my legs don't seem to work properly anymore.

Deep breath. And breath out.

&

about to go in

I hope your family is going to seek out some professional help. There are many very good support foundations out there more than qualified to help and advise. Talking through your Sons background to one foundation will invariably lead to another support foundation that can help you and your wife out.

I sincerely hope you talk soon to these people, no matter how disturbing it all is right now.

The very best of luck.

Yup, what bullheart says.

Keep posting on the thread if it helps. Don't if it doesn't. Use the people around you, family, friends, colleagues and even us misfits on here whenever necessary.

Do whatever you need to do to keep on track.

You are already demonstrating true strength of character by your posts on here, and I can glean that just from reading text on a screen.

Keep going.

Still don't know what to write, can't write anything meaningful that's for sure. But you sound like you're getting some comfort from your posts, so keep it up as long as it helps.

Love to all

Wishing you all the best at what must be a very difficult time, healing vibes.

Hope there are some positive signs from your son. They won't mess you around in the ITU. They are used to giving people information as it is. This from someone who's sister was in a seven-week induced coma. Take each day as it comes.

Thanks for all the comments, and thanks for putting up with me writing this stuff, it does help deal with it.

Just got back from visiting him. He's in a sort of half-coma: he actually squeezed my hand at one point, and he sort of half-opens his eyes, and half rolls them back in his head. He also seems aware of the intubation tube on occasion, and yawns sometimes.

Tonight there was a very helpful nurse on who I hadn't met before. I asked him about my son's current GCS score, but I probably should not have done so. I also asked him where the original words about "catastrophic" came from. It seems that the consultant - with many years of experience - has only seen a handful of cases as bad as this. A lot of badness showed up on the CT scan (he had a long word for the badness but I've forgotten what it was).

It's just as well this forum has a swear filter.

MRI tomorrow, should give us more information.

My wife just sat with her head in her hands while I was asking about this.

Keep going bud, nothing I can say, meaningfully. Remember to look after yourself and your wife too. Good luck.

We are rooting for you, your son and the rest of your family!

It must be a great positive that he squeezed your hand.

If you have medical questions, ask to speak to the consultant. No disrespect to the nursing staff, but it is the consultant who is leading the care and is best placed to answer the questions.

he actually squeezed my hand at one point

I keep looking at this thread and thinking: you're doing really well sir, keep on.

Sam

All love from the BSN family, thinking of you and your family. Sheesh, what a thing life is. xxx

Hang in there, oldnpastit, and more good wishes to you all.

Small steps oldnpastit, all good stuff 🙂

Thanks for the update - keep popping back to this thread as many others seem to be doing. Good to hear he squeezed your hand. Here's hoping you get some good news after the MRI scan!

I sincerely hope things keep going in the right direction for you and small steady positive steps of improvement. My thoughts are with you your wife, family and friends. (I have been following this thread since it started and after 9 pages I only just have built the nerve up to post.)

Let's hope the MRI brings some good news. Stay strong.

Oldnpastit, I have only just seen this. I have nothing intellegent or clever to add apart from that I am thinking of you and your family.
Hang in there

Stay strong Oldnpastit ,would be nice to hear some good news in your next post after the MRI scan

Love him and hold him. Thinking of you all.

thanks for putting up with me writing this stuff, it does help deal with it

please carry on writing here if it helps you...write as much or as little as you feel is necessary, even if its to vent off.

we'll read your posts and still offer what support we can.

everyone is thinking of you and your family and hoping for a positive outcome for you all, especially your son.

he sounds like a fighter and the fact that he's squeezed your hand shows that he is fighting and making progress. be strong for him and for your wife.

i think you did the right thing in speaking to the nurse. as upsetting as it may be to find out the true extent of his injuries, i think its best to know how bad he was to appreciate the progress he's made so far.

hope the MRI goes ok.

Keep strong oldnpastit. Don't be afraid/too proud to ask for help when you need it.
You seem to be coping well with the situation as it is, but please look after yourself.

My thoughts are with you and your family.

As a parent I can only imagine what you are going through. Stay strong Oldnpastit, thinking of you.

not been on here for a while, and just seen this thread. Fingers crossed for a good recovery.

@oldnpastit ,

It's taken me a week or so to gather the courage to read your thread, as a parent I can't imagine what you're going through.
I don't know what to say to offer any support or constructive advice. Other than keep sharing updates here, hopefully this is a place where you can share your feelings and your sons situation, a place where decent folk will listen and offer words of support.

Look after yourself & your wife.

oldnpastit,
So pleased to hear of the little bit of progress. As soon as I come on STW my thoughts are with you and your family. Hang in there man.

I've only just read this thread...firstly, I'm very, very sorry to hear your news.

As as father of 2 young girls...I wonder / worry some days about how their lives will play out given the complexity of modern life.

As a husband who had to tell his wife the circumstances of her mother's suicide...you have my heartfelt admiration for your courage now and hopefully your resilience in the future.

As a friend of several fellow motorcyclists who have suffered brain injuries...I'm happy to report one made a full recovery and another has made excellent progress as the years have passed.

Best wishes for now and the future and please do let us all know if we can help in any way. Sometimes help with simple, practical stuff, that can free up your time to help your family, can easily be sorted out by a bunch of folks in singletrack world.

oldnpasit it, I can't really offer anything useful myself, other than wishing you and your family all the best.

Is it wrong that I found Glasgow Coma Scale funny? I though it would have been in days. i.e. New years day the worst with Tuesday morning the best.
If that is inappropriate then I sincerely apologise.

(Im from Glasgow BTW)

Thanks Bigyinn, I hadn't thought of it that way 🙂

I'm not very good at serious stuff, so I just try and make people smile.

Only just seen this thread - another random stranger wishing you and your family all the luck and strength in the world. Life is hard, I hope your son pulls through and finds his place in the world.

And yes, perhaps if you asked what that equates to on the Stratford Upon Avon Coma Scale, or the Trumpton Coma Scale.

Just read the thread again front to end, and according to my wife I had leaky eyes (which is no mean feat)

I've no idea how to respond, other than I can't imagine what is going on in your mind(s) - made especially worse when I twigged how young he must be.

I'll keep checking in for your updates, I hope they are making you feel better somehow

I was having a moment of self pity today and then thought of this thread.
Still wishing all your family well.

Just popped back to this after what I thought was a bad week for me. My perspective changed somewhat.

Your report of the first nurse and your lives changing was an eye opener but that's in the future. Today and only today should be dealt with as tomorrow is a long way away. Next week well that currently doesn't register on the GAS meter.

All the best to you and yours. Sympathies to the family whose son died.

More healing vibes on the way to your lad.

Thank,you for posting here oldnpastit.

My heartfelt wishes for your boy, you and all the family.

I have nothing to offer in terms of experience of this situation but I'd just like to thank you for sharing your experiences with this situation, it certainly puts many of my own and I'm sure many others issues in perspective!

Thoughts with you and yours, all the best.

MRI didn't happen in the end (scheduled for next week now) but they did another CT scan which again showed pretty serious injuries.

I managed to speak to the consultant and the phrase he used was "significant neurological deficit", and didn't seem to think that responding to his name really signified much by way of actual awareness.

However, having digested all that gloom, I then went to see him. He had the propafol turned off, but some fentanyl (sp?) still running to keep him sedated, but he opened his eyes and looked around the room in response to his name (in what seemed to me like a much more co-ordinated way than yesterday). He also squeezed my hand a couple of times when I asked him to, though it seemed to tire him out doing so. He cried a few tears as well.

Every little battle........'Miracles' do sometimes happen and whilst nothing will ever be the same again he is still with you. Keep strong but don't forget to take time out for you and the rest of the family, it will keep you sane and healthy!

Bless him. Thanks for the update. We're all here for you if it helps. Stay strong and hold on tight to all those little positive signs.

I then went to see him. He had the propafol turned off, but some fentanyl (sp?) still running to keep him sedated, but he opened his eyes and looked around the room in response to his name (in what seemed to me like a much more co-ordinated way than yesterday). He also squeezed my hand a couple of times when I asked him to, though it seemed to tire him out doing so. He cried a few tears as well.

I doubt I'll read anything more moving for a while.

Good luck to you all.

The human brain is a wonderful thing. A young one can do things my old one is not able as it is still maturing. Here's hoping today is the start of something good.

Wow Oldnpastit - that is quite incredible! Keep the faith

After posting on the 1st page of this thread I had one of my staff inform me his son had tried to take his life that evening,much the same scenario with drugs etc but thankfully not in such a violent way as your son tried so he is only in a psychiatric ward!

This isn't good news as I'm struggling at the moment as my wife who along with secondary progressive MS is starting to show very clear symptoms of early onset dementia.

oldnpastit I've just had a look again at your original post and while the medical staff are still emphasizing the seriousness of your boy's injuries it's clear that the situation today is more positive and hopeful than it was a week ago. I hope that these small steps forward help to give you the strength that you need for what is obviously going to be a very difficult time for you, your family, and all his friends.

.

MrOvershoot I am so sorry to hear of the truly difficult situation you are having to cope with.

Life is a great gift but it can also be so cruel.

This isn't good news as I'm struggling at the moment as my wife who along with secondary progressive MS is starting to show very clear symptoms of early onset dementia.

Having seen someone I cared about suffer from MS at a much greater distance and a close relatives decline with dementia - this must be almost impossibly hard. I don't think many of us can imagine what you must be going through.

All I can say is take care - and this feels totally inadequate.

J

just checking in with this thread and wanting to say that, though i don't know you or your family, my thoughts and sincerest best wishes are going out to yaz.
keep each other goin'...ain't nowt to do but that. hope can be a powerful thing.
peace.

I've only just caught this. That's bad. All the best with it....AND look after yourself

Some quite good news.

He had his MRI and apparently the doctors were pleased with it. And he's had the bolt in his head removed, and his femur had a shiny new titanium rod put in it. They've been trying to reduce the sedation to see what happens, and when they do that, he starts moving his legs, feet and arms. He also opens his eyes a bit, though what he can see/understand I don't know.

He's still being kept sedated though, as he keeps trying to remove the intubation.

The CT scan showed badness (I still can't remember the right word) especially to the frontal lobes, but I don't imagine we'll know what effect that has had, if any, for some time.

...AND look after yourself

thats super news Oldnpastit!!

🙂

Very pleased to hear you've had some good news and progress!
Keep pluggin' away.

Oh, and that post a couple up; hope you are finding the time to look after yourself - decent meals and sleep to keep yourself going?

Was thinking last night about you both, glad to hear more positive progress.

Glad to hear you've had positive news. More hugs 🙂

Sounds very positive, this is good news, says badnewz.