Separated but with ...
 

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[Closed] Separated but with kids involved - contact?

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How do you handle this?

Phone contact when with you/not with you?

is it an open house each parent calls when ever or strict times etc?


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 9:37 am
 DezB
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Phone contact when with you/not with you?

is it an open house each parent calls when ever

Those.

We text each other most days. He stays at mine once a week and every other weekend, or other arrangements if one or other is busy. We tried flexible arrangement to start with but it just led to confusion.

Anything that doesn't upset the kid really.

Obviously, that doesn't work for everyone...


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 9:46 am
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How old is he/does he have own phone? this is the sticky area. I'd like to have a kid phone but ex says no


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 9:48 am
 DezB
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Started about 5 years ago, not sure if he had a phone then (he was about 11). Don't see why not though, all kids have phones now - his first phone was a cheap Windows thing, wouldn't have been much older when he got it.


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 9:51 am
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Recently separated, couple ofonths now. We're amicable so see my two pretty much every other day and spend weekends with them. Both have mobiles and can call text what's app etc. Works well, really try and keep things amicable this goes a long way to make it easy for the children.


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 9:57 am
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been a few years now, amicable it has not been!


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 10:11 am
 FFJA
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Every other weekend Friday night to early evening Sunday for me.

No contact between times, phone calls pictures etc. Zilch.

5 yr old.

I wouldn’t recommend this arrangement as being any good for your mental health 😢


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 8:13 pm
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That sounds shite 😢


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 9:47 pm
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This is more about phone contact btw


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 9:48 pm
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Separated three years with three daughters 10,15 &19 all have phones frequent text,facetime etc when not at mines I have them Wed,Fri one week Wed,Fri & Sat the next week all seems to be working ok so far, all pretty amicable but took a bit of time to get to this position ..best of luck hope it all works out


 
Posted : 22/10/2018 10:22 pm
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How old are your children and why is your ex against having a phone to talk to the kids on?
Is it just for the sake of being awkward on her part?


 
Posted : 23/10/2018 10:22 am
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Generally get a nightly call from kids (7&9) when they are with their Mum to hear what they have been up to that day. When with me, they phone their Mum nightly too.

Also get occasional Whatsapp messages from their mobile phones (both have cheap Android phones).


 
Posted : 23/10/2018 11:55 am
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She’s 9

dufficult is an understatement


 
Posted : 23/10/2018 12:55 pm
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Perhaps 9 is a little young to have a decent phone, but no reason why they can't have a basic phone at home so you can talk to her. What is your ex's objection out of interest? Can you compromise and use her home phone, or will she not answer if she thinks its you?

Perhaps you need to get something formalised (assuming you haven't already) so that if the -ex denies contact she's in breach of agreement?


 
Posted : 23/10/2018 1:27 pm
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I can talk to her - it's more how do you progress contact e.g, do you allow texting form your phone to other parent etc, how frequently?

my idea is to create a group for me/kid

kid/mum

parent/parent

keep things clean/organised?


 
Posted : 24/10/2018 12:05 pm

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