Problem with my bro...
 

  You don't need to be an 'investor' to invest in Singletrack: 6 days left: 95% of target - Find out more

[Closed] Problem with my brother in law, is there anything we can legally do?

13 Posts
10 Users
0 Reactions
56 Views
Posts: 8306
Free Member
Topic starter
 

My brother in law is a lazy, angry, aggressive twunt. Can't keep a job down and pisses any money he has down the drain.

He is always manipulating the father in law and getting money off him. Not huge amounts, but several thousand over the last couple of years.

The FiL is partly disabled from a stroke a few years ago, is on a lot of meds and I don't think he is fully compos mentis.

He is currently demanding for £3k "to start a business". What business I'm not entirely sure.

This causing a lot grief for the Mrs. She is very stressed and worried about the situation.

Is there any legal route we can go on this? Can we speak with social services? The police?

Any suggestions?


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:00 pm
Posts: 17273
Free Member
 

Power of Attorney for the father in law before the Brother in law gets it first?


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:05 pm
Posts: 6874
Full Member
 

If your sis/SiL?? thinks he's a "lazy, angry, aggressive twunt" why doesn't she bin him off? If he has the same negative impact on you, your Mrs, your SiL and your FiL he clearly needs the flick.


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:20 pm
Posts: 8306
Free Member
Topic starter
 

If your sis/SiL?? thinks he’s a “lazy, angry, aggressive twunt” why doesn’t she bin him off

Sorry if it's not clear but he's my wife's brother. She has very little to do with him. However, she still cares for her father and her sister and that's what causing the stress.


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:23 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

yup, get a POA* although if as you say the FiL is not fully there this may prove difficult and may be too late.

* you actually need two, one for health and welfare and another for property and financial affairs

https://www.gov.uk/power-of-attorney


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:27 pm
Posts: 20675
 

What perchy said


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:28 pm
Posts: 34376
Full Member
 

The police?

About what? Your BiL sounds like a lowlife, but none of those character traits are actually illegal. Talk to the BiL about how worried you are as a family? Encourage your FiL not to give him any more money (unless he actually wants to, of course).

You say you think your FiL isn't all there, is he or not? Can you go to see his doc with him? There may be a safeguarding issue that the GP can raise.

All the best, sounds shit though


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:32 pm
Posts: 13192
Free Member
 

Don't forget that whatever your point of view is about your bil or his intent it is still your fil's money to do with as he pleases. Your first port of call should be with him, not your bil.


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:37 pm
Posts: 8306
Free Member
Topic starter
 

TBH if it was up to me I would let him get on with it, I'm not the biggest fan of the FiL either, I'm only concerned about reducing the stress on Mrs Gob.

Not sure how Power of Attorney would help? It doesn't stop the FiL getting pressured from him, he can still give him money. Unless we took all his money off him, which we don't want to do.

Encourage your FiL not to give him any more money (unless he actually wants to, of course).

Both the Mrs and the SiL have tried. The BiL is an absolute shitbag, he just pesters and hassles him, sob stories, needs to pay bills, needs a car, needs this, needs that, until he gives him money and then he's off down the pub.


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:47 pm
Posts: 188
Free Member
 

It comes down to his fil's mental capacity to understand the situation, and financial decisions etc. Has anyone talked to fil about it, what does he want to do?

If there are serious questions regarding his capacity then it is potentially a criminal matter, but one ime that Police would try and defer off to local authority for adult safeguarding. Then adult care would be able to look at capacity and take things from there.


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:50 pm
Posts: 4420
Free Member
 

I’m only concerned about reducing the stress on Mrs Gob.

you may wish to consider finding a slightly less unflattering pseudonym for your dearest 😆


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:55 pm
Posts: 188
Free Member
 

For me the POA is a mechanism for longer term support and management. And again issues will be around does fil have capacity to appoint a POA, if he does and retains capacity the he remains the decision maker until he loses capacity and the attorney takes over. If he doesn't have capacity to appoint a POA, as bil could equally apply to it.


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 12:55 pm
Posts: 8318
Full Member
 

Send him on a mountain biking holiday in France?


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 1:11 pm
Posts: 8306
Free Member
Topic starter
 

Send him on a mountain biking holiday in France?

I would love to but the fat bastard couldn't pedal fast enough to be mistaken for anything but a fat twunt on a bike.


 
Posted : 19/10/2018 1:18 pm

6 DAYS LEFT
We are currently at 95% of our target!