[Closed] Parents - what's the worst kids film you've had to endure!?...

No one film on it's own, rather the same film over and over and over. Moana once is great. All the songs from Moana on a loop 200 times a day ? 👿

See also Frozen, Trolls, Tangled etc

Three little ninjas knuckle up...it was a sequel to three little ninjas.

My Little Pony!.... (skinny and boney)

I am a dad and I have a son so I still like what he is watching haha.

Yep, there's something in small children's brains that means they can see the same thing over and over and over and over again and not get bored.

My little one is into Paw Patrol at the moment, there's a couple of series worth on Netflix but she only wants to watch the one with the Alien.

My Little Pony!.

You shut your filthy whore mouth. MLP is awesome!

Here's my favourite Rainbow Dash outfit:

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Some of the Direct-to-DVD Disney stuff is absolutely appalling though. e.g. "Once Upon A Halloween", which is basically just bits of other Disney films stuck together for no real reason with very little attempt at a plot.

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For me it was - Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel

Besides the obvious - Finding Nemo and Frozen.

Finding Nemo is just one long string of oppressive jeopardy sequences, the dad is annoying as hell too. As for Frozen - utterly un convincing, and that stupid snowman is the pits. None of it makes sense. It's garbage.

The '[b]BARNEY[/b]' movie

😯

The Peanuts movie last year.

Rubbish and it destroyed all my fond memories of Snoopy and crew.

Dear Lord, the Peanuts movie was awful - luckily I didn't have any fond memories of Charlie Brown, as I always thought it was rubbish.

However, the Penguins of Madagascar is truly awful. Makes no sense and is just shouty and loud.

The Last Unicorn.

The water horse.

As above once was ok, but Christ over and over and over again. The last time I saw it I was willing the shells to hit him.

Actually quite like Frozen. Cars is pretty dull, luckily the girls think so to.

However, the Penguins of Madagascar is truly awful.

It's brilliant! "Dave!" And the names of the other octopuses.

Or do I just have Stockholm Syndrome?

G-Force. G stands for gerbil apparently not godawful.
High School Musical was starting to wear thin after about the twentieth time.

'Barbie and the Great Fairy Rescue' I think it was called, although it was a good few years ago now it's still etched in as being the worst 90 minutes of my life.

The only thing I really took away from it was that during the ads for the upcoming stuff, another kids' film had 'Kickstart My Heart' by Motley Crue in the soundtrack. It was aimed at 6-8 year olds 😯 😆

My Little Pony!

The post credits scene where they were taken to the glue factory was the best bit.

As the father of two young girls, I consider it one of my lifes greatest achievements that I have managed to avoid ever watching Frozen

Dear Lord, the Peanuts movie was awful

Mrs Binners took Binnerette number 2 to see that, and she would concur, though the language she used was considerably more forceful

I think Alvin and the Chipmunks is the worst I've had to endure

Cars is pretty dull,

Planes is worse.

The elevator pitch must have been [i]"Let's do 'Cars' but with planes"[/i] and that's exactly what they did.

I consider it one of my lifes greatest achievements that I have managed to avoid ever watching Frozen

As kids movies go, it's actually a pretty good film watch ONCE.

Planes is worse.

Planes 2 is worserer.

Our first and last 'Disney' (barring Star Wars of course, but I don't count them) was Tangled. Wasn't all that bad but after the first song, No. 2 son turned around an asked 'Are they going to do that like every 10 minutes??'
They were oot.

I'm not even a parent and had to endure the horrendous film that is Nativity 2 with my niece.

However Planes 2 has White Zombie in the soundtrack so its ace!

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It was made worse because I genuinely wanted to see it and wanted my kids to enjoy it as much as I liked the original (and Bilko for that matter).

had to endure the horrendous film that is Nativity 2 with my niece.

Maze Runners.

"No superheroes, no kids book adaptations". That's my cinema motto now. Serves me well.

No one film on it's own, rather the same film over and over and over.

Planes 2 is worserer.

Sweajnr (3.5) gets 30 minutes of his choice every day. For the last 2 weeks it's been the last 30 minutes of planes 2 every evening... 👿

Our first and last 'Disney' (barring Star Wars of course, but I don't count them) was Tangled. Wasn't all that bad but after the first song

I quite like Tangled, there are some good gags in it.

Lego Batman.

It's basically the same joke recycled every minute for an hour and a half or however long the film is (felt like years).

On the flip side I really like Frozen and Sing.

[b]WTF is happening to me?[/b]

Luckily my kids don't subject me to trash the MIL takes them to those ones.

Rio 2

Lego Batman +1 - People had told me it was good but I was very disappointed.

Well it has to be Peppa Pig the movie ,absolute drivel .

Worse as i had to endure it during a hot afternoon viewing as it was a work client. so only bonus was that i got paid to watch it.

Cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2.

Absolutely awful!

Lego Batman is awesome. Fools.

Now Cars I didn't mind at all.

It was my daughters favourite film for a long time - and all the model cars from it are in her 'special toys' box on the attic (including approx. 9 Lightning McQueens!).

She secretly wants to go and see the new one, but would never live it down if her mates found out!

Thankfully she was never into Disney Princess movies.

Rio2 is a good shout. Truly awful. Most times I prefer kids films nowadays - even the chipmunks. Good escapism. But the people who dreamt up rio2 should be made to walk the streets naked.

davosaurusrex - Member
Lego Batman is awesome. Fools.

POSTED 21 MINUTES AGO # REPORT-POST

Yep, that's pretty much [b]the[/b] joke. Repeat in a stupid deep 'uberhero' voice every ten seconds for an hour and a half and you don't need to see the film.

None of your choices come close to the scary, insane cheap arse Puss in Boots film that's on Amazon Prime. It makes no sense, the animation is just wrong but I can't explain how and it's freaky as hell. I've contemplated breaking the television just to avoid it.

Not a film, but the Tweenies. I could happily torture those foam faced bastards all day long. On a plus point Mrs Funkmaster put Trolls on for Funk Jr and when they started singing he put his hands over his ears and cried his little heart out. He did the same for Sing too. Never have I felt so proud. He shares Daddy's natural fear of musicals.

Happy Feet 2.

The only film where my boys wanted to leave early!

Thomas and the Magic Railroad.

Truely awful. What were they thinking?

Disney's Dinosaur pish

liked planes 2 over planes,
cars 2 - random
muana - bollox
reef,, antz, anything made to be like anything else, done on a cheaper budget

monsters inc sequel (prequel?) shite

Thomas and the Magic Railroad.

There is an episode where they brick up a sentient train in a tunnel for having the audacity to want to do a different job. WTF is that teaching to children?

Don't get me started on the new Postman Pat. It's no wonder the Royal Mail can't compete with other couriers either. When you take in to account that 99% of the yearly budget is spent on helicopters, quad bikes and single seat aeroplanes. All so that one massively inept ****wit can balls up delivering mail to twenty houses.

 

THomas and the Magic Railroad has very little to do with the original, odd, stories by the Rev.
It's so weird and disjointed with real people and trains and magic and stuff.

You should see it actually. 🙂

They are going in on their own for this upcoming masterpiece

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Cloudy with a chance of meatballs 2.

Absolutely awful!

I enjoyed that. Properly batshit stupid 🙂

Tangled I liked. Even the numbers.

'Barbie and the Great Fairy Rescue' I think it was called, although it was a good few years ago now it's still etched in as being the worst 90 minutes of my life.

I was quite surprised at how wickedly funny the Barbie Dreamhouse TV series is though 🙂

Actually that's a good shout I think Nativity 3 pips the Topcoat movie to the post.

Frozen was awful, thankfully only had to see it once. Cars, though, is great.

Worst I saw was also the first one we took my eldest to see at the cinema: Piglet's Big Movie. Utter crap, sentimental American take on a classic, with piss-poor animation too.

Frozen was awful, thankfully only had to see it once.

Really? I think it's pretty watchable (once). But then I don't suffer from musicalphobia like some 🙂

They are going in on their own for this upcoming masterpiece

Quite looking forward to that - the Captain Underpants books are fun and should translate pretty well to a movie.

anyone elses kids keep trying to select sausage party on now tv? 😆

End of thread.

My daughter is only 10 months old, I'm feeling a little dread about what's to come over the years now.

Barbie and the Great Fairy Rescue

There's a whole bunch of those Barbie movies, just awful. I can tolerate My Little Pony, like most of the Pixar and Disney stuff, but the Barbie movies have no redeeming features. They don't even make the kid shut up, she just runs around spouting lines from the movie.

The 'BARNEY' movie

I have nightmares about being strapped to a chair in a white room, Clockwork Orange style, forced to watch it non-stop for the rest of my godforsaken life.

Jezuz pull out my finger nails and stub cigarettes out on my eyes but not Barney.

*kids'* Ffs (apostrophe stuff). And it's "Legend of the Sasquatch" after the 300th viewing.

"Song of the Sea" is bearable though - might watch it again tomorrow for the 301st time.

Thomas and the Magic Railroad.

Worse than anything else on this list. Seriously, you lot are way fussy or you HAVEN'T SEEN THOMAS AND THE MAGIC RAILROAD!
It is without doubt the worst 90 minutes or so I have spent with my daughter.

I took my kids to the cinema while very hungover (me not them) to watch the Moshi Monsters movie. It was utter drivel. I thought I'd managed to nod off a bit but they were so concerned I was missing bits they kept waking me up.

Trolls

If you're doing a musical, get people who can sing in tune.

And a plot. Plots are good.

So are characters.

Rio2 is a good shout. Truly awful. Most times I prefer kids films nowadays - even the chipmunks. Good escapism. But the people who dreamt up rio2 should be made to walk the streets naked.

It's the only time #1 spawn has ever said to me 'this is rubbish. Can we go now?' and we went before the end.

These are the English language movies that I can remember I've been forced to watch in the last 12 months (repeatedly) with my 4 yr old son

Trolls - actually okay
Moana (Vaiana over here) - okay
Bolt - excellent
Up - excellent
Frozen - cr4p
Smurf movies - awful
Cars and Planes 1 & 2 - okay
The old Lego Batman movies and Lego Stars Wars - dire
Every Thomas Movie - beyond dire

although he prefers to watch tv shows - Octonauts and Paw Patrol are the favourites at the moment

Lego Batman every day, but I still laugh in places, same with despicable me 1-3.

I managed to be at work when Mrs S had to sit through Dragonball Z at the cinema.

We've avoided the bad ones and mostly enjoy the rest.
Worst was probably Cars 2, but then we all agreed on that one.

As others have said. I enjoyed Frozen and Moana, but after they've seen it the 50th time and sung the songs for the 1000th time it gets a little much.
Hard to say 'You're Welcome' without doing it semi-tunefully though.

Luckily Toby doesn't really have the patience to sit through a film yet.

He does like Cars though. He's most likely to sit through the Good Dinosaur.

He likes sitting with an iPad and watching Netflix and binging on Paw Patrol, Umi Zumi and Puss in Boots.

The trailer for the Emoji Movie probably rates as the worst thing I have ever seen on a screen (including some of the dodgier u-tube links I've been sent), can't wait for the film itself.

Really? I think it's pretty watchable (once). But then I don't suffer from musicalphobia like some

Beauty and the Beast was a decent Disney musical - Frozen was't.

I liked all of the films my kids watched endlessly as I'd always fall asleep on the sofa while watching them. Formula 1 also has exactly the same effect, it's rather a pleasant way to spend a couple of hours, eyes getting heavier and heavier and the sound just becoming a background noise and oblivion.

Yep, there's something in small children's brains that means they can see the same thing over and over and over and over again and not get bored.

As an aside, when was it that small kids gained total control of the household TV? Exclusive rights as to when its on and what is being watched right up to their bed time. I'm sure 70's children got a. less TV time, b. had to ask when it went on and c. got vetoed if grown ups wanted something else on or just got pissed off with the noise. It appears going to friends and relatives houses that adults now just bend over to their infant overlords who rule the domestic universe.

I'm sure 70's children got a. less TV time

That's cos kids TV was only on for a short time. Now it's available all the time.

I have a horse obsessed 7 year old, as such I've been subjected to such wonders as "Spirit, Stallion of the Cimarron" and "Albion, the Enchanted Stallion"

Thankfully she spends a lot of time outside!

That's cos kids TV was only on for a short time. Now it's available all the time.

That does not mean it has to be watched all the time though does it?

Why don't you go switch off your television set and go out and do something less boring instead.

Not a film but Pepper f*&^% pig, again and again and again at 48 million decibels. I am sure that is used as a form of torture in North Korea...

That does not mean it has to be watched all the time though does it?

Of course not. I'm just pointing out that holding up 70s parents as ideals of perfect parenting isn't quite fair - at least when it comes to TV.

Why don't you go switch off your television set and go out and do something less boring instead.

Always thought that intro incredibly ironic.

Both Lego movies. Can't say whether I hated Batman or the original one more.

When he was younger took jr to see Curious George - we both found it extremely boring.

Always thought that intro incredibly ironic.

Indeed . I wouldn't go down well with todays ratings obsessed TV execs.

But the programme content was almost exclusively to arm young kids with ideas of things they could make or do and activities to do afterwards. A kind of toolbox for fun for long summer holiday days.

The latest Jungle Book movie I thought was pants. Frozen I've managed to avoid mostly, thank god as the 10 minutes I did catch were bad.

I like the lego movies, they are a decent watch.

Harry Potter.

Strictly I wasn't a parent at the time, but I think had been convinced it was sensible cinema viewing for a 20-something couple. Possibly by the same people who suggested to Mrs North that we try eating at Nandos.

I fell asleep and woke up only to blurt out (rather too loudly it happens) "Is it still not finished?".

Not a film, but Bing. He's such a whiny lying little prick, and Sula is such a know it all smug ****. Amma is packing a lotta junk in the trunk tho 8)

The 'BARNEY' movie

OH MY GOD THERE'S A MOVIE?!

I can't even begin to imagine.

People hate the Peanuts movie? You. Are. So. Wrong.

And people hate the Lego Movie? I loved it. But then, it resonated because I am the dad and my son is the son, albeit with a rather more lazy idea of what constitutes an awesome piece of brickwork.

You dismantled the entire Star Wars cantina to make a half-Greedo half-Yoda freak sitting on a cup? You bring this to me for my approval? Get out of this house!

I can't recall the worst I've seen, I've probably blanked it out. Though the Paddington trailer looked so bad that I refused to watch the film.