[Closed] Online Dating Updates

I really can't be bothered with it anymore.

Been going 6 months now, was obvious we "clicked" right from the start. I met a couple of weirdos who had ended up on POF for a reason.... but this one is a keeper.

Well, a few stories there to keep my spirits up, thanks chaps. I've had 2 'coffees' so far this week. Almost managed to land a very attractive, fit mountain biking lady but there were a couple of deal breakers on each side - gutted! A road cycling lady yesterday but cycling was the only thing we had in common. I've got one more this afternoon and another one tomorrow. I'm seriously processing them! For some reason, all my email contacts suddenly want to meet up! I've still got a couple to get booked in for next week.

I'm not some sort of man-tart, I'm just seeing if there's a spark and to make subsequent text-based communication more meaningful. I used this 'industrial processing technique' to fantastic effect 4 years ago. I met the woman of my dreams but let her go... Idiot!

[i]'industrial processing technique'[/i]

QC at an earlier stage might help you 😉

(Just jealous that you can find that many dates really!)

A female friend was on Match.com. She is ok looking, but said she was fed-up with the never-ending requests.
I've heard the male to female ratio on Match is 5-1, but the sites don't like to publish this.
They also then tried to entice her back with a free account.
So if you have found your partner online, well done! You've beaten the House.

I met a couple of weirdos who had ended up on POF for a reason....

I met a few on various sites. Worth going to bed with, purely for the experience. 🙂

*dons flame jacket*

Would like to get my money back from Match and Fitness Singles, but PoF came up trumps for me. Quite happy 6 months down the line. 😀 thing was I was inpsired by comments on here in a wholly indefensible voyeristic impulsive manner to see the "monsters" (sic) on PoF, so just goes to show... good luck if you are still hunting.

[i]in a wholly indefensible voyeristic impulsive manner to see the "monsters"[/i]

I bet you don't miss them though eh?!

UPDATE:
I have just arranged a mountain biking date for Sunday... We're meeting for the first time with our bikes and setting off! Cool eh?

yea Dez - quite happy to be out of the game.

Hey, surroundedbyhills, you're the example we're all trying to follow. I'm sure my date on Sunday will be riding a BSO but hey, it's biking...

POF is good if you're a nice guy and keen to meet up. Too many philandering keyboard warriors so the good guys stand out, it just takes a while for the ladies to filter down to you through the twits and liars!

So, In 8 days I will have had 6 dates. 4 off POF, 2 off Match (I complained about the poor Match app and they gave me 3 days free and I managed to get those 2 in the 3 days!).If Strava gave KOMs for dating...
Still, I have to convert one of them into a girlfriend which is now the tricky part as I have to pretend to like talking about things other than bikes!
I too wish to get off the crazy internet dating train. For GOOD!

BOOM! Had a first date yesterday - mountain biking! If you wait long enough...
Second date to take place within 24 hours. I declare a result! Fingers crossed I don't f*ck it up now. Wish me luck STW, I'm going in!

Luck however

POF is good if you're a nice guy and keen to meet up. Too many philandering keyboard warriors so the good guys stand out, it just takes a while for the ladies to filter down to you through the twits and liars!

So, In 8 days I will have had 6 dates. 4 off POF, 2 off Match

Deveron53
UPDATE:
I have just arranged a mountain biking date for Sunday... We're meeting for the first time with our bikes and setting off! Cool eh?

Did you seduce her with your enormous wheelying skills? 😉

so 6 date sin 8 days over two sites and you are one of the good guys and not a philanderer

Did you seduce her with your enormous wheelying skills?

Oh well, that lasted 11 days... The same people seem to go around and around on the POF carousel. Got to try something else, too many damaged people with 'issues' to handle.

Any ideas? My cupboard is bare!

Dev making the assumption that you are the same age as me (and 90%of STW) it's highly likely that any new relationship will involve some level of baggage handling, the trick is finding a small regional airport and not Heathrow. Good luck mate.

Hmm, shall I vent on here about menopausal middle aged women and their mood swings? 😆
My relationship died a sudden death.
Not going to be looking again for a while, it's all too much hard work keeping up with someone else's feelings when they are as changeable as the weather.
Fun while it lasted anyway!

Despite shibs fear for me still going strong since Nov ish
They are out there if you keep looking

Have to agree with SBH (which makes a change 😉 )

We all have 'issues', you just have to find someone whose issues fit into your life. I am presently seeing a compulsive organiser - I have never been on so many weekends away / bike bothy trips / hill walks... Life is hectic but its pretty darn good 😀 Take a break maybe, but don't give up!

Thanks for the support guys! I'm going to leave the dating scene for a while, I shall continue with my personal improvement projects.

yeah, what junky said.

4.5 years here, met my gf through match (4 days from the end of my year's paid access and I'd given up trying, basically!).

i decided i was too picky, but was unable to compromise on most of the dealbreakers i'd set. so i stuck to my guns and figured i was just destined to a life of solitude, then up popped someone who turned out to be a perfect match for me.

keep the faith, gents!

I have weakened and have POF, Match and Fitness Singles Profiles but am sticking to my guns on 'dream woman' criteria. Thing is, there are a lot that fit my criteria but are either in Edinburgh or Glasgow. NE Scotland is a loooong way from there.

Going strong after nearly 5 months; she's even started riding.
This is good because she can come riding with me, but bad because she's claimed my bike as her own and has meant I've had to buy another.

She likes the downs, but not the ups which is good because I can quite happily piss-off on an XC ride at my pace cos she's got no interest in coming along, but bad because of the need to spend a small fortune on body armour.

She's dead fit and massive pervert, which is good for obvious reasons and bad for no reason I can think of

Good on you mate. Glad someone is making it work.

My love life on the other hand, looks a bit more like this.

[img] [/img]

has this been mentioned?

cycle speed dating

https://billetto.co.uk/csdmenwomen

back on the chain gang (sigh), gonna try real life, can't be any worse than online dating. Well, might try FS as a maximum.

OKCupid is my favourite site - it's just a shame there's not many on there close to me.
Tinder's worth a go too - Even though it's supposed to be a hookup app I've found a lot of folk are looking for more. And funnily enough, they're usually more refined than those on POF! (This is based on Cumbria, YMMV!)

Ref online dating, My Experience: http://uberhumor.com/tinder-has-taught-me-a-lot-about-the-new-generation-entering-the-dating-pool

[i]My Experience: http://uberhumor.com/tinder-has-taught-me-a-lot-about-the-new-generation-entering-the-dating-pool [/i]

You What?

Rob Hilton - Member

Going strong after nearly 5 months; she's even started riding.
This is good because she can come riding with me, but bad because she's claimed my bike as her own and has meant I've had to buy another.

She likes the downs, but not the ups which is good because I can quite happily piss-off on an XC ride at my pace cos she's got no interest in coming along, but bad because of the need to spend a small fortune on body armour.

She's dead fit and massive pervert, which is good for obvious reasons and bad for no reason I can think of

So your only downside is you've had to buy yourself another bike? and the upside is she's a deviant?

You have got it tough, do you need a cuddle? 😀

Soooooo... being a long term singleton, decided to join POF the other day after work colleagues doing a lot of persuasion. We'll see what happens but I don't have any expectations, apart from already being pretty convinced I'm going to die a lonely old man... I'm no good at the dating 'game'.

@DezB,

I kid you not, the bovine creature that was sat across from me, described herself as a Mountain bike enthusiast with a "few Extra Pounds", Not only struggled to get in the chair, but nearly couldn't get out of it, Had so much metal in her face, it was like a date with a terminator, and took great pleasure in telling me she was pierced elsewhere, if I wanted to take a look. I didn't, I went to the bog and then bolted!

Has nobody mentioned the this yet?

Fit, sane, single. Choose two.

[i]trailofdestruction - Member
Good on you mate. Glad someone is making it work.
My love life on the other hand, looks a bit more like this.[/i]

Well seeing as you appear to live on Mars, I'm not surprized that you're not having much success.
[img] [/img]
/p>

Any update on when NASA might be sending you some space chicks?
[img] [/img]

Anyway, good luck. The last site I tried was the Telegraph. Which seemed to have cornered the market in women who either just want to perpetually book travel holidays as part of their ongoing mission to visit [b]everywhere[/b] 😯 Supposedly in order to give them killer bragging rights at the dinner party. There were so many comments in the style of:
" [i]Well travelled, but plenty more places on the list, that I have yet to see[/i] ". I don't mind a bit of travel, but the prospect of being constantly dragged off to yet another 13 hour flight to go look at old buldings, street wise monkeys, or summmat, everytime the current account has more than £500 in it. Doesn't appeal.
Or, they were horsey. Which is a guaranteed killer deal-breaker!

Incidentally, I discovered one persons theory on this dating malarkey. Their theory being women in their early to Mid 30s are looking for guys around their age. However, those guys in their mid 30s, who are looking to "settle" are looking at younger women, 25 to 30. Hence a miss match which seems to have mid to late 30 something women trying to find someone.
Intersting theory, which several of my friends do actually fit.
He, having met Mrs Friend in his early to Mid 30s, Mrs Friend being 3-6 yrs younger. They have a few yrs together (he is now late 30s) and then the sprogs arrive and they both float into their 40s, the poster picture of domestic family life.
Go figure.

[i]coolhandluke - Member
Has nobody mentioned the this yet?

Fit, sane, single. Choose two. [/i]

I think you may be setting the bar a bit too high, if you're hoping for sane. Especially when the definition of that word varies according to gender.
😉

As a Man, accept that you will never fully understand a woman, no matter how long you spend with one, they will always be able to puzzle you with how they see a situation. To which your reaction, naturally, will be "wtf ??". Know this, be ready for it and enjoy the rest of the ride.

It's not as simple as fit/sane/single. You need the hot/crazy axis

I kid you not, the bovine creature that was sat across from me, described herself as a Mountain bike enthusiast with a "few Extra Pounds"...

Fair enough, but that graphic you linked to didn't mean anything to me.

I feel sorry for you dating guys (and gals). I know someone who has gone online recently and shes used 6yr old pics of herself on her profile.

Of course its her and you are allowed to use your best pics and some people instagram their pics to death but come on- at least a recent pic! 😐

[i]shes used 6yr old pics of herself on her profile. [/i]

It's an occupational hazard I'm affraid ole boy. Frankly, ime, 6 yr old pics is light weight, compared to what I've witnessed. However, probably a good indication of what you might be letting yourself in for.

But yet, the watering hole is poisoned by players, people with no intention of forming a relationship. The number of times women have thought I may have been a player. Quite frustrating for the genuine folk.

" Well travelled, but plenty more places on the list, that I have yet to see ". I don't mind a bit of travel, but the prospect of being constantly dragged off to yet another 13 hour flight to go look at old buldings, street wise monkeys, or summmat, everytime the current account has more than £500 in it. Doesn't appeal.
Or, they were horsey. Which is a guaranteed killer deal-breaker!

I'm not in the market, but I've been popping in here to see just how you Guys are getting on, however this caught my eye..

Or, they were horsey.

Which got my fetlocks ruffled 😆

Frankly, ime, 6 yr old pics is light weight, compared to what I've witnessed. However, probably a good indication of what you might be letting yourself in for.

Go on- intrigued!

[i]hora - Member

Frankly, ime, 6 yr old pics is light weight, compared to what I've witnessed. However, probably a good indication of what you might be letting yourself in for.

Go on- intrigued!

[/i]

Don't confuse willing to debate, with willing to humiliate.

[b]People[/b] posting pics of themselves in their late 20s when they are early 40s. Appears to be fair game in the minds of some. I don't subscribe.

I don't 'get' that. I'd post pics of me- then I know if someone contacts me and it developed into meeting up I wouldn't have to worry about them thinking 'god he photographs better than he looks'.

Why would a girl do that? Chancing it or ego- the worry that not enough online hits means not enough attention?

[i]Why would a girl do that? Chancing it or ego- the worry that not enough online hits means not enough attention? [/i]

Firstly, allow me to refer you to an earlier post:
[i]As a Man, accept that you will never fully understand a woman, no matter how long you spend with one, they will always be able to puzzle you with how they see a situation. To which your reaction, naturally, will be "wtf ??". Know this, be ready for it and enjoy the rest of the ride.[/i]

Secondly, I'd hesitate to say only women do that. For all I know (and it wouldn't surprize me) some men might make that [i]mistake[/i] when throwing up a dating website selfie.

However, I'm with you. Being honest, including using recent pictures, is the only way to be. Pity I'm not photogenic.

Or adding a million filters to the pics..... had more than one that looked NOTHING like the pics...
Or my fave was the one who after a lovely evening, loads of chat, flirting, etc told me she soooo wanted to take me home!
Then an hr later after more texting sent a text saying I wasn't what she was looking for! 😯

[i]Or adding a million filters to the pics[/i]
Well, that is their perogative. I can way beat that though.
One women I got chatting too, eventually offer the detail that the picture in her profile wasn't of her, it was a picture of a friend.
😆

[i]Then an hr later after more texting sent a text saying I wasn't what she was looking for![/i]

Like I posted, women and men don't do the same line in 'sanity'. Roll with it, while remembering, we probably confuse the shit outta them too.

Also, ime, women approach online dating convinced that all men are murders. Obviously there's some sort of scale to female sanity.

Life, eh?
😉

Should've known better seeing as she is a member on here.........

Weird. I'm bloody glad I'm not doing it. I asked her about the pics- why not a recent one as she'd look better (IMO- she would)- she just giggled and didn't answer.

Think I'd rather turn bloody gay or celibate. 😆

Should've known better seeing as she is a member on here.........

Ooooo mother of one?

As I started this thread I feel I should post an update. I have rekindled an old relationship, one that I should probably have not walked away from in the first place but perhaps the break has done me good. I've decided to give up on women completely and am back on the mountain bike 😀

[i]I've decided to give up on women completely and am back on the mountain bike[/i]
And they lived, happily, ever after.
**Sniffles**

[i]she just giggled and didn't answer.[/i]

That is your full-blown crazy girl, right there!

No - fit as f*ck, cheeky an ever so slightly bomkers - perfect really but hey 😆

[i]No - fit as f*ck, cheeky an ever so slightly bomkers - perfect really but hey[/i]

You'd think that, so long as you never find out what she's giggling about. Guarantee it aint anything you're saying to her.

Like I posted, completely off the reservation.
Gotta lov'em.

**** me. Good to be reminded how lucky I am.

[i]hora - Member
**** me. Good to be reminded how lucky I am.

[/i]
Just never allow yourself to find out what she is giggling at. Serious!

I had a flurry (well, about 4 - which is definitely a flurry compared to the usual!) of messages last weekend... .now, if I'm going to message someone, I'll look at their profile, pick something interesting from it and message them about that, with a question of some kind to prompt a reply (or not, as is usually the case (probably because I'm not George Clooney and that's who they all deserve) ahem)
Message I get (from, it has to be said, fatties) invariably say "Hi there (-: "
or in one case "Hie there" Cool, can't even spell a 2 letter word that one.

One said "your grey sidies don't suit you". I felt like sending some abuse in response.

Am actually meeting up with my previous erm, PoF "friend" (ok, "girlfiend") this weekend. Nice that we're still mates I suppose!

[i]because I'm not George Clooney[/i]
😥

You too eh?

You guys want some tips? 😉

[i]You too eh? [/i]
Actually, I've got that full head of hair, in that style, brown, going white at the sides.

Unfortunately, I appear to be just as Human as anyone else, until I get 2D as in a picture, then it's like "Who's that!"
It's hopeless.
😆

What I initially found to be confusing was how those Clooney hunters, weren't exactly Julia Roberts / Kate Blanchett themselves. Funny that.
**Sighs**

[i]emsz - Member
You guys want some tips?
[/i]

Ermmmm, Thanks and all that, but I'm not sure that employing whatever techniques you use, to get wit the ladies you like. Is going to work for me. Something to do with the plumbing, I believe.

But enlighten us anyway, I'm here til 12.

[i]What I initially found to be confusing was how those Clooney hunters, weren't exactly Julia Roberts / Kate Blanchett themselves. Funny that.[/i]

Exactly my point. They see something different from me in their selfies with a pink phone in front of their double chins, that's for sure.

(I'm not bitter, honest!!)

those Clooney hunters, weren't exactly Julia Roberts / Kate Blanchett themselves. Funny that.

No because every single hollywood/Working Titles film has a loveable, sweet female who is slightly downtrodden, likeable and identifiable with everyone who ends off with a handsome, successful, caring and funny guy.

In contrast the parallel version males are lambasted/always chasing the hot women and never having any success with anything.

So (sadly) females seem to be of the opinion that they too must have the same outcome and not put up with less.

Maybe an oversimplification but hey.

Then theres Sex in the City. Jesus wept 😯

emsz - Member
You guys want some tips?

surely its the guys giving the tip.......

Well seeing as you appear to live on Mars

Lancashire actually, which can be surprisingly similar at times.

You guys want some tips?

Is it about the way I always start a conversation with " Hi, so on a scale of 1 - 10, how mental would you say you are ?"

[i]hammyuk - Member

emsz - Member
You guys want some tips?

surely its the guys giving the tip....... [/i]

Careful, Emsz has an alternative perspective on chicks.

[i]trailofdestruction - Member
You guys want some tips?

Is it about the way I always start a conversation with
" Hi, so on a scale of 1 - 10, how mental would you say you are ?"
[/i]

Errmmm, no, really, that's er, fine?
😆
Ok, I know you're only joking.... you're joking, right?
😯

Solo - I'm fully aware of Emsz "perspective" 😉
it's a lucky girl thats get to play with her 😀

[i]Then theres Sex in the City. Jesus wept [/i]

Hell yeah, the dating-sphere is awash with SJPs.
Mare!

Hi, so on a scale of 1 - 10, how mental would you say you are

Surely that doesn't work? Even the most "normal" ones start at about a 4 😕

Emsz has an alternative perspective on chicks.

I know a couple of bi-ladies who love to **** lesbians around. Its almost as though its fashion, wake up fancying abit, lead on then drop the poor girl for a new bloke. Mental.

[b][hora trying to understand women][/b]Is it certain women want to feel wanted, want men (or women) to chase them then when they feel wanted they turn stone cold and move on?[b][/hora trying to understand women][/b]

[i]Careful, Emsz has an alternative perspective on chicks.[/i]

In that I'm capable of interacting with other people as a normal human, you mean? 🙄

I don't speak chicken

[i]Is it certain women want to feel wanted, want men (or women) to chase them then when they feel wanted they turn stone cold and move on?[/i]

Those are certainly still in circulation. Once they know they [i]own you[/i] they drop you. Your choice is to decide whether you can live never being able to convey just how much you like them.
Or move on.

Secondly, I'd hesitate to say only women do that. For all I know (and it wouldn't surprize me) some men might make that mistake when throwing up a dating website selfie.

I just realised my facebook profile pic is now 6 years old.

The one I don't understand is my missus, her pic was old when we met, and it's a low resolution blury one!

[i]In that I'm capable of interacting with other people as a normal human, you mean?

I don't speak chicken
[/i]

Wind your neck in, that isn't what I posted, as you well know.
Although how you seem have chosen to take my comments, perfectly illustrates the point I was making earlier.

Funny thing, with minorities, you try to cater for them and you're a patonizing shit. Ignore them and you're equally as hideous.
Thanks.

**** it its Friday and I love you guys

1. Be yourself. Be confident be happy. smile
2. Be honest with her and yourself about what you both want
3. Show some interest in what makes her tick
4. Dress nice, smell nice, have a hair cut
5. Pay for dinner (although lunch is a nicer first date)
6. Never say "I'll call you" if you're not gonna. It's cheap
7. Lots of girls are shit scared of the date nutbag, its different for us, be nice
8. Oh, you can't deal with crazy. She might be smokin but trust me, you won't ever be able to get a handle on it, there's a reason she's single
9. We might have hang ups : commitment, trust whatever, you know what? most of you have as well
10. If you don't want to kiss her 3 hours in, it's not going anywhere

Ok?

Ok, I know you're only joking.... you're joking, right?

Yes, it's a joke. No emoticons were harmed in the making of this post.

In that I'm capable of interacting with other people as a normal human, you mean?

*serious face* As are most people. I think half the problem arises with miscommunication via a keyboard. You pick up so many subconscious emotions when you speak to a person face to face, that get lost over t'internet.

Hell yeah, the dating-sphere is awash with SJPs.
Mare!

Neigh lad.

^^ Thanks Mom 😆

You're welcome sweetheart x

My poor daughter has pretty much given up on finding a decent bloke, she ended up buying a pair of kittens instead. 😯