[Closed] Online dating help...

Yes, I'm sure that's exactly how it words

Possibly

Likes lazy Sunday mornings, breakfast in bed and Terry's Chocolate Orange.

Likes raisins, xt rotors and cheeky logins.

Likes Rohloff lube, Magura hose clamps and 50mm O-Rings.

Boys, why didn't you warn me about the drunken 2am phone calls.

Had too ask her politely to delete my number.

Nutter

gofasterstripes - Member
Likes Rohloff lube, Magura hose clamps and 50mm O-Rings.

And eyes watered at the PA thread.....

I was amazed by the number of fake profiles. You can generally spot them, they look just a bit too attractive... And if you drag the picture into Google images, it's usually all over the web with suggested search terms such as "Cute brunette"!

That's a ****ing marvelous idea

Inspired by this thread I signed up.

So far one girl wants to meet me, being pregnant is one way to get round the no kids criteria!

And a pictureless profile is trying to chat to me!

seriously?! (the pregnant one not the pictureless one)

To be honest I signed up out of curiosity - put a pic up too, but rapidly took it off.

Plenty of fish - jeez, more like a bucket of piranhas. since then i haven't summoned up the courage to look much further into it

*climbs back on familiar old shelf*

Likes sanity, professionalism and Elgar.

(dis)Likes contemplating if Bikebouy is my boss, running away and hiding

"Climbs up on shelf to kick wench back down" 😉
And runs off to do a username search.......

POF is no different to real life and probably safer in some aspects as you will have some history already before you meet. Unless you only go out with your pals.

There are genuine folk that are hard to find and plenty players and weirdos. The same rules apply. Its just more efficient. The old profiles and fake ones are a bit annoying.

Take the initiative, The ladies do get bombarded though, according to the other half.

Likes lurking looking and licking

Its been 24 hours now, I think I might need to work on my profile some more.

Spin class is a valid first date right?

joshvegas likes : wobbling around on the spot, breathing very hard and sweating?

alot of people on Pof look like they could do that without the aid of a spin class

Edit: Bad me - making all the rather large unfit men feel uncomfortable about their body image . . . . bringing equality to the world or stooping to the lows of others that impose similar pressures on women

(or just me taking the p!ss slightly 😆 )

See that documentary about online dating last night?
Basically you're going to be defrauded out of 1000s of quids if you reply to anyone online!

Likes Scaremongering, sensationalism and bollocks journalism.

Spurred on by this thread I also signed up to POF and had a couple of "would like to meet" requests. No message, no "I saw you and we have a mutual love of whatever", just an automated impersonal request. Maybe I am old fashioned but I'd like a hello at least!

No DezB - but i am not really a TV person, and not really into the idea of parting with cash for that kind of service. I know it may work for some but i'm really not convinced about online dating at all so doubt i will be losing buckets of cash anytime soon. Will save the cash for bikes and to feed an army of cats in my old age 😉

Spin class is a valid first date right

making all the rather large unfit men feel uncomfortable about their body image

Likes: long delays between updates,sideburns and the smell of napalm in the morning

Likes lazy Sunday mornings, breakfast in bed and Terry's Chocolate Orange.

Part of my dream involved a chocolate organge last night. I can't remember the rest of the details.........possibly a blessing in disguise!

After the numerous POF posts about peoples profiles, I had a quick look to satisfy my curiosity and to royally take the piss. Unfortunately you have to sign up post a profile before you can browse. Too much effort.

Likes easy to view profiles, sweaty spin classes and newly waterproofed bike jackets.

Just google POF search and you get the basic search and can view profiles without signing up 😉

you should see the pics of the women who claim they go to the gym and the term average seems to cover a multitude of shapes and sizes!

yes, i was slightly confused with the categories - until i worked out athletic obviously meant someone who leaves the TV and sofa for leisure as well as work!

*Likes Ballet, Laura Ashley dresses and Jammie Dodgers 😉

Maybe I am old fashioned but I'd like a hello at least!

The "Would like to meet" feature is only available to women - I think it's a good thing... The online equivalent of a smile across a crowded room.

It might seem old-fashioned, but the majority of women on there expect the man to take the initiative and send the first message. The "Would Like To Meet" is their way of undoing another button on their blouse, twiddling with their hair and seductively felating an olive on a cocktail stick at the bar... Trust me, I know women... 😉

If its only available to women, the girls aren't replying because I am a rough looking lesbian.

I am definitely worse at online dating than offline dating, i didn't think that was possible!

I had a girl message me on pof last night saying

hot!!

that made me feel good

It should! She's got the central heating on, so she must be LOADED! 🙂

That would be great Shib, if they weren't all mid 40s and look like they are on first name terms with the staff at Greggs.

Shibboleth - Member
The "Would like to meet" feature is only available to women - I think it's a good thing... The online equivalent of a smile across a crowded room.

PoF FAIL Shib - it's available to guys too in the App and via browser

Really? I know you can scroll through clicking yes/no/maybe, but what's the thing that's only available to women? It actually says "this is only available to women" when you get the message... Is it "express an interest" or something like that?

I'm afraid I've not been on for a few months... Otherwise occupied you see 😉

The "yes/no/maybe" is the Meet Me part but Yep - "expresses an interest" is something they get.
Basically ALL of the dating sites are geared towards getting men to foot the bill.
Even being able to "hide your profile" is now only available if you "upgrade" :-/

Otherwise occupied you see

[i] I know you can scroll through clicking yes/no/maybe[/i]

When I first went on the site, this was like a bizarre computer game... later I'd be walking around the shops and couldn't help but do the Yes/No/Maybe thing with women walking past. Wrong. So very wrong.

would anyone contact someone who had said maybe?
its like saying only if I was pissed/desperate surely

DEZ for years I used to involuntary whistle fat bottomed girls by Queen - i am not even a fan- when i saw a lady who fitted this description.
Now i notice and stop.
No idea why I do this but yes its wrong 😳

I always whistle/sing Bicycle Race when I unlock one of mine 🙂

[i]would anyone contact someone who had said maybe?[/i]

They wouldn't know. It's like a "save for later" (I think)

Yep - correct DezB

I always whistle/sing Bicycle Race when I unlock one of mine

Unlock a bicycle or a naked lady? - love that video, makes the t-shirt one look soooo tame

(feel its safe to say on here - but will keep that comment away from the other thread!)

I used to enjoy [s]designing a woman[/s] selecting parameters, until I realised that what I wanted didn't exist, or had a very different idea of 'slim' 'athletic' or on one notable occasion 'late thirties'.

I thought it was a if you both say maybe you find out about each other type thing.

Whats with the distances they think are acceptable? Pretty unlikely i am going to travel up to angus for a cup of coffee if i am in edinburgh!

I was trying to be genuine as that what every girl seems to want but i might just lie and unleash my true personality on the second date.

adjustablewench - Member
love that video, makes the t-shirt one look soooo tame
(feel its safe to say on here - but will keep that comment away from the other thread!)

They admit in their documentary that a lot of "fun" went on that day after filming and more than just the saddles got sniffed 😉

I think the Queen video is waaaaaay more tasteful than the t-shirt one!

I'm only 29 you know!

I was trying to be genuine as that what every girl seems to want but i might just lie and unleash my true personality on the second date.

You have to bear in mind that an "average" looking woman will get several emails a day, so you're going to have to find some way of standing out if you're going to get noticed. Also, from what I've been told, women get so many emails that they don't even bother opening half of them. I tended to restrict my emails to women who'd viewed my profile winked/expressed-an-interest. Made it easier to use a genuine-sounding, disarming opening gambit, even if it was largely copied-and-pasted, something along the lines of:
"Hey, I noticed you'd looked at my profile but didn't send a message... So you're either the type of person that's not comfortable sending messages to strange men on the internet, or, you found my pics totally repulsive... etc, etc."

My profile was a very sarcastic dissection of the weird and wonderful world of dating that hinted at a few disastrous dates and contained plenty of observations of the process that gave women plenty of scope to send a message without having to struggle for something to say. It's a tricky tactic - you know that you're going to alienate a large proportion of the women who don't "get" the humour, but I figured that I'd not want to date someone who didn't have a sarcastic streak!

You bought a mirror

No, I found a perfect 10 a few months ago... I'm still waiting for someone to tell me it's some sort of wind-up! (Match Dot Com if you're wondering...)

Likes fat-bottomed girls, comfy saddles and wet-wipes.

Argh. I messaged one last night who didn't have a photo... BAAAAD move!
A photo has been added 😯

Why would you do that Dez?? If a man doesn't have a profile pic, it's because he's married. If a woman doesn't have one, it's because she's butt ugly!

Schoolboy error..

Do you get to rate your date afterwards?

Like eBay feedback? Could have a few different categories - start with "Did they arrive on time" - 1 to 5 stars.. and then whatever other categories you can imagine 😉

Then at least you could have a date where 99% of people say "He/she looked like picture"..

There must be potential for this..

[i]Why would you do that Dez??[/i]

Boredom!

[i]Do you get to rate your date afterwards?[/i]

Yes, although I'm not sure if anyone but the datee sees it.

There is a feedback facility on POF but it's really not used very much... If you think about it, why would it? If the date went well, you wouldn't want to big that girl up to other blokes, and it would be rather ungentlemanly to give an honest rating of a disastrous date!

And there was me thinking I'd taken my picture off because the number of messages was just silly - but I now realise its because im butt ugly 🙂

On the other hand I havent logged in for ages so am not really a serious pof user, and probably shouldnt comment 🙂

[i]I'd taken my picture off because the number of messages was just silly[/i]

How many a day? Just interested to know how many a butt ugly female would get 😉

adjustablewench - Member
And there was me thinking I'd taken my picture off because the number of messages was just silly - but I now realise its because I'm butt ugly

matter of opinion 😉

So you took your pic off just to reduce the amount of messages you get?? Yeah right. 🙄

Shibboleth. he know how to talk to ladeez 😆

Yup, even the ugly ones... 😉

* likes stroking, striking and streaking 😀

happy to be ugly to you Shib - unfortunately all you need on pof is a pulse an a pic to show you aren't actually a pig-in-a-wig and you really do get bombarded, but others have said the same too so you don't have to take my word for it 🙂

[img] [/img]

😆

the search is over!
My inbox:
[i]How are you?? My name is Anastasiya! i seek a gentleman. I enjoy walking, arting! Write me mail on nastya.anastasiya@poczta.onet.pl Bye bye, Anastasiya.[/i]
[img] [/img]

Oh yesss!

(Shame her "F" key isn't working)

Sounds legit. Send her your bank details, skip the small talk.

adjustablewench - Member
all you need on pof is a pulse an a pic

You have a pulse? (runs off to see where the hell Oxspring is.......)

likes women with a pulse, sarcasm and google maps

google search on the image finds nothing... seems legit 😉

well she looks 'armless

is that lass trying to show us she shaves her pits?

(Shame her "F" key isn't working)

Good thread. Thoroughly approved.

Surprising who you end up chatting to 🙂

oh, Hello again Hammy 😉

Well I took a bit of advice from this thread. Spotted a rather nice blonde lady on a dating site and sent her a message. Turns out she is into mountain bikes although this wasn't mentioned on her profile. Then on the third message I asked her out for a drink as per Shib's advice. So far no response but it was later on last night. Fingers crossed.

Hey! I was after her! 😆

I asked her out for a drink as per Shib's advice

Then on the third message I asked her out for a drink as per Shib's advice. So far no response but it was later on last night. Fingers crossed.

Good luck Mister P! Fortune favours the brave... If she doesn't reply, you can always fall back on the "Sorry, was I rushing things? I just thought we had a lot in common so it would be good to meet, see if we click..." sort of thing.

I tended to include a bit of NLP when asking... On the second or so message (right after she's asked how you're finding the website - they always do) I'd throw in something like "Yeah, there seem to be lots of nice people... A lot of people just seem to be looking for pen pals and never actually go on dates!!"

That way, she'll be keen to prove to you that she's not one of those people that frustrate you so much... (for all the doubters, shoot me down, but 90% of the time, this works ALL of the time ;))

Then, when you come to ask, you say something like "so, are we going to meet for drink? Or are you one of those girls that just likes emailing..."

It's just sales... Attract, convert, close. Then seal the deal 😉

?????????

???????????

of course you could play games and use his cunning Jedi mind tricks.
Then again you could just have the confidence to be yourself rather than project a façade to cover up your inadequacies and lack of confidence

Likes baiting,honesty and people comfortable enough to be themselves

people comfortable enough to be themselves

This [i]is[/i] me being myself... 😉

You might have the rest of your life to "be yourself", but you'll never know unless you win the dating game.

[i]Then again you could just have the confidence to be yourself rather than project a façade[/i]

Nah, tried that, doesn't work.. 🙁

(I know there was a thread about it, but what is the actual point of cuterunner's posts?)