[Closed] online dating experiences

My old Flatmate used to go on Plenty of Fish all the time, Loads of sex with women he met, Majority wern't too easy on the eye, rest were weirdos... his advice would be the better ones that you have to pay for, two other friend's both met current partners on Match (?) & seem happy

I met the current Mrs Bones at a 'tweetup' love her to bits

Actually met a nice lady and we went on a great ride around the dark peaks.

From friends and suchlike, the Guardian Soulmates one does seem to be worth the effort, if you like that kind of person. Some of the others are clearly more for, er, fishing, but it depends what you're after.

I used to do it before we all had computers and email; it was just somebody in an office who had some kind of matching up system. Trouble was, as you worked your way through their list of possible candidates in your area they got increasingly reckless and began sending you more and more rubbish, further and further away from home.

My most successful, er, [i]date[/i], was as a result of giving my phone number to a girl who was in a relationship at the time. Shortly afterwards she kicked him into touch and we embarked on a six month sex marathon, which was good fun.

A mate used them but spun so much BS about himself that when he finally met them they ran a mile. Shame, as some of the girls he met were actually very nice.

I used Match.com, & after sharing a few emails had a blind date with the lady who's now my wife. Its our 10th anniversary this year.!!!

I used to meet girls off of MySpace. One turned out to be 4'6" - that was never really going to work.

Been on the online dating thing for a bit and met a couple of girls, one of which I'm seeing at the moment. Very early days but things seem fine.

Go with recommenations on web sites, some of them can be a bit dodgy. Not heard good things about Matchaffinity.

EHarmony only sends you people it thinks you match with so not so much choice.

As said I'd try one of the more main stream ones like Match, lots of people on there.

One note though, if you are looking for a relationship and not just sex then be mindful that a lot of people on these sites play the odds and have several on the go. I don't do this but you could well be one of many on the list of people to see or currently seeing.

on these sites play the odds and have several on the go

I knew someone who used POF for a couple of years - she did the same, always had a number on the go- say seeing (actually seeing) 3 blokes at the sametime with 'chats' with others. Every so often she'd prune one or so off and 'promote' to the inner circle. She always said she was unlucky in love/trying to find love but to me it looked like she was eating out alot and getting an enormous amount of casual sex. Literally rotating blokes every night- meal then back to hers.

Why do people hide from the truth/what they are doing?

Personally (being honest), if I was single I'd do it one at a time- see how each relationship goes. [s]I've got the bedroom energy for multiple[/s] I'm a sexual tyrannosaurus however you'd spend most of your week servicing all these multiple relationships. Madness and a fulltime job in itself- you'd have no quiet time/relax after work etc. Are some people 'lacking something mentally'?!!!

I'm never going to be able to look at a map of Norway without giggling now!

Did think about dating sites, but was too scared in the end. Don't need to now

Elzorillo would the teacher be Runcorn based?

No mate.. Notts.

[i]I'm never going to be able to look at a map of Norway without giggling now![/i]

Stay away from maps of the Mull of Kintyre...

Few years ago I spent a long time writing a profile, had loads of dates. most only met once as you can tell alot about a person in a night out. Spent about 4 or 5 months persevering, trying a few different sights, the Guardian one was good as you had to pay, I think people spent a little longer writing about themselves. Eventually I met a wonderful, wonderful women, even before our first date we had clicked, I made a supreme effort on the first date. Had some great experiences in the first few weeks. We got married last year 🙂

I used Fitness Singles about 3-4 years ago. Met some people I'd never want to see again, a couple of girls who remain good friends and then met a girl which developed into a really good relationship.

The long distance thing killed it after a year or so but I wouldn't have met her without online dating.

Hmmm. I've used Match previously - met my ex that way and we were together for 5 years so I guess that is kind of a success (ish)?

Thinking about parting with my money to give it a go again but to be perfectly honest i'm pretty worried about making another bad judgement-call! Guess that means the time isn't quite right yet.

As for funny stories, where should I start... I have had all sorts of 'interesting' photos sent through to me, scary puckered-up lunges at me as I get in the car, plus some nasty white loafers I just couldn't come to terms with 😆

I'm never going to be able to look at a map of Norway without giggling now!

As already mentioned.... avoid this one too:

[img] [/img]

Only on here is the map of the world turned into pictures of nobs 😆

Only on here is the map of the world turned into pictures of nobs

Not just here!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mull_of_Kintyre_test

[i]*Sigh* people are so easily offended round here[/i]

Anna. No offense taken, but I did read it a bit like the typical throw away comment I see women post about men, in [i]general[/i].
As you know, we're not all knuckle dragging, smelly and beer bellied.
*waits*

On another note, the women being econimcal about the number they choose to indicate their age, seems to be a common thing and a none starter, imo, as its a lie from the outset. Who wants to get with a liar ?.

Another example of being economical with the truth. Once, during an exchange of messages, it was finally revealed that the picture in the profile wasn't of her, but a friend.
😯 😆

My experience of online dating resulted in a wife 😯 😀

At the time I was a bit embarassed as I thought online dating was a bit naff etc ... although apparently online dating is now the more likely way to meet people than going out in the real world and actually meeting an actual person, in person.

I reckon online dating makes sense, especially for blokes - you can get everything else you want on the internet, so why not a gf/partner/wife? 😀

It's just an extension of shopping online, although everything's "sold as seen", and there's no guarantee or warranty.

No experience to speak of yet....i've just taken the plunge and registered on PoF. Not really interested in 'fun', just want to meet a normal, well adjusted woman who shares my love of bikes, music and interesting cultures. So far i've found 2 who might just meet the requirements. First date on Friday with the one i'm most hopefully about. Massively nervous as i've never done a blind date before!

On another note, the women being econimcal about the number they choose to indicate their age, seems to be a common thing and a none starter, imo, as its a lie from the outset. Who wants to get with a liar ?.

A friend of mine does this. Says there is a big amount of difference in interest when she drops her age just a few years to earlier thirties. I don't agree with her but meh...

I'm 'on' Match currently but have not paid up. Personally, I hate Match as you cannot see or do a single thing without paying first. Considering the amount of unsuitable candidates out there, it would be nice if you could make that judgement early on without paying so much money, as you can on Guardian etc.
I've had a few 'winks' and messages lately on there, but am not in a position to stump up the money yet so they shall remain a mystery I guess....

I did read it a bit like the typical throw away comment I see women post about men, in general.

Whilst that sort of thing irks me too, you did take half a sentence out of context in order to pull her up on it. You misread her comments I believe (though whether accidentally or intentionally, I don't know).

A friend of mine does this. Says there is a big amount of difference in interest when she drops her age just a few years to earlier thirties. I don't agree with her but meh...

You see, no offence to your friend, but I don't really see the point in this...

I'm 37 and i'm sure there might be more interest if I was 5 years younger. But i'm not. I want to meet someone nice for a relationship not a quickie, so surely the age thing is going to come out at some point and then I would look like some kind of lying nutter?!! I just don't really get the whole lying thing. Much better to be honest - unless you do just want a quickie 😉

If someone lies about their age to 'get interest' then they are being unsuccessful elsewhere in their personality/search so far IMO hence they are dropping years off to try and garner more interest.

If someone is over 40, so what. ALOT of girls (and guys) out there actually look for a mature person in a partner. I know a few people with 10yr age-gaps who are happy.

Anna. No offense taken, but I did read it a bit like the typical throw away comment I see women post about men, in general.

Which are far, far outnumbered by the reverse on here 😉

No experience to speak of yet....i've just taken the plunge and registered on PoF. Not really interested in 'fun', just want to meet a normal, well adjusted woman who shares my love of bikes, music and interesting cultures. So far i've found 2 who might just meet the requirements. First date on Friday with the one i'm most hopefully about. Massively nervous as i've never done a blind date before!

I tried POF for a while last year with very similar aims but despite messaging plenty of girls with what i considered to be reasonable messages showing a good level of interest i didn't get very many replies, and no dates. How did you word your profile and messages to get good interest so quickly?

Good luck with your blind date! 🙂

You see, no offence to your friend, but I don't really see the point in this...

I'm 37 and i'm sure there might be more interest if I was 5 years younger. But i'm not. I want to meet someone nice for a relationship not a quickie, so surely the age thing is going to come out at some point and then I would look like some kind of lying nutter?!!

I agree, don't see the point. She justifies it by saying that it's really just to garner initial contact as she believes men see her age(she's only 36) and walk on by. She says that if someone does contact her she then quickly will tell them her real age but also her reasons for lying..

Incidentally, she is a nutter...so that's ok then 😀

Got accepted onto 'Darwin Dating', nothing came of that as I just wanted to see if I'd get in or not. Being a naive sort I went on an online date years ago where it was obvious she was just (desperately) after one thing. When it came to getting a cab later that night in her mind we were both going back to hers but I just bundled her in and shut the door after her. I realised then that the proportion of sleazy desperates on dating sites is probably akin to the fakes on fleabay. Despite this, of the next online date, me and my very sweet significant other have been together eight years this year. She did the initial 'poking' or whatever it's called. Neither of us can believe we were on such a site these days (think it was called Udate or some such, seemed overpopulated by ne'er do wells in retrospect).

FWIW I think Online Dating is probably the best way to meet folks. Ok so the search engines a bit dodgy in some but at least you can decide whether to exchange details in the comfort of your own home, remotely without the angst of actually meeting, for this reason it's safe, don't forget that some folks are a little bit scared of folks like Hora and even conversing with him on heres a bit scary on occasion.

If I had the choice to do Online Dating I'd go for a Pay site, descrete and from what I read so far on here eH and the Guardian look about right.

I do know someone who used PoF, but then he used it for shagging around, he wasn't particularly nice either, bit scummy and uneducated, for that reason I'd stear so far away from PoF if thats the kind of folks you'd probably meet on there.. Just a bit too "Ewe" for my liking.
"shudders"

Dwarf - I spent a bit of time looking at the competitions profiles, and then did something a bit different! My profile is open and honest, doesn't have a list of likes and dislikes and is longer than a few lines. I've chosen a few things that I am passionate about and written about them. I've made sure that what I have written includes my personality if that makes sense. I've also chosen photos of me that aren't torso shots, just regular photos!

As for messaging, I make no reference to a girls looks and use phrases like 'you sound interesting', or quote some bit of their profile that I like back at them followed by 'sounds like a good start', or some such.

Only time will tell if this approach works....somethings got to, right?!

I dabbled a bit in my single days. Wasnt much of a hit. Few bits of 'fun' but nothing amounted to much. More bunny boilers than decent lasses.
A work collegue came in with a print off of a date he had for that evening. Question was raised as to how she was single. He went on the date and found that the photo was wrong. What he met was like a sasquatch, who managed to stop all daylight from walking out the house. he made his excuses and ran........

FWIW I think Online Dating is probably the best way to meet folks

You know I think we've forgotten how to interact in the digit age. When I pop down to my local pubs I'm engaged in conversation all the time by people I've never met/known before. Alot of them are female (shock). I doubt they are hitting on me as our area tends to be quite relaxed/laid back but why does it need to be dating site nowadays? Does no one go to a Library/bookshop etc etc anymore?

(I know the answer..)

Thing is Hora whilst you may have the confidence to hit on women everywhere armed only with your dashing good looks, natural charm and the beautiful member not everyone will.

Secondly most of those women will be in relationships and just being polite.

you get to a certain age and you dont really meet "new" folk in your circle of friends and hitting on women in pubs when i am 40 is not that appealing tbh.
Not sure what sort of woman I would get in the discount book shop either 😉

I would never have met my SO without the internet and just think it is the modern way - I dont think I would be using it were I in my 20's

You know I think we've forgotten how to interact in the digit age.

Oh the ironing

The digital age has expanded the possibilities for communication, like posting on a mountain biking forum with a bunch of people I have never met, and most if not all I will probably never meet. It's an addition to other forms.
Besides many people don't want to spend their times in bars and pubs.

Well the way I see it is we're not in the Pub at the moment and we're arsing around on the Internet, I hazzard a guess that there are lots of folks logging on to Dating Websites rather than being enlightened to the delights of STW.

There are worries I have about it though, I've mentioned the Lad I know who uses PoF, but also there are some folks that are married and just bored who hanker after Fun and find a "match" then use them as some sort of Pawn in a torrid triangle lurve tryst.. and that folk might just be the innocent party in all of this..

You know what I'm getting at.

Caveat Emptor (or summfink like dat)

I'm hitting on no one in any of my local pubs. I think its how you look (not your clothes). How approachable you are. There are alot of inquisitive people out there. I must admit if I was out looking for someone I'd probably struggle but not looking (typical) I tend to get conversation etc without asking.

I'm kinda despondent with interaction- on my recent rides I've ridden alone, hate it. I miss human interaction.

Ps- anyone see a lovely looking blonde on the left/right for sock shop in some nice stockings? 8)

Hora/Junkyard - the thing is, as dating websites become more popular people go out with their friends to have a nice time safe in the knowledge that they don't need to try meeting new folk as the dating sites fulfil that role.

[i]armed only with your dashing good looks, natural charm and the beautiful member[/i]

Ahem. Phwoar.

I look like the love child of Phil Mitchell and Binners.

You know my story, Al.

Summer of debauchery followed by finding the woman I'm now married to with 2 great boys.

What have you got to lose (apart from loads of pent up frustration)? It'll get you off here too...

Ps- anyone see a lovely looking blonde on the left/right for sock shop in some nice stockings?

Yep 🙂

Al, have you tried the Sarah Beeny site where your friends fill in your profile for you? You could get the other big hitters to sort it for you. The ladies will be queueing out the door...

http://www.mysinglefriend.com/

He he nice one Rickos

I'll write up my experiences later

mattromans - cheers Matt, some solid advice there - not sure writing about myself is a strong point but definitely worth re-writing my profile to see if I can improve and sound a bit more passionate about my hobbies rather than "i like biking, etc"!

I think on-line dating just makes the whole thing a lot easier!

I love chatting to new people and making new friends, always chat to folk out biking etc, but I have no idea if any of them are single etc etc as that's just not the thing that comes out of a normal conversation (especially a biking 'you've got a flat tyre' type one). Plus, from the reverse point of view, it's probably always assumed that i'm the other half of one of the male bikers i'm riding with.

Even trickier to meet people in non-biking ways - I would never go to the pub by myself, and if i'm out with my friends it's just that, to spent time with them.

Pah. I'm talking myself into this, going to have to sign up properly and pay for the damn thing 😕

Naughty hora, naughty hora...why do I always feel like a Wolf on such subjects 😐

Just email me notax, miss the whole signing up step out completely 😉

just want to meet a normal, well adjusted woman

Yeah, good luck with that one!! 😉

What, and take away all the fun..?! 😆

He he 😆

Can't remember what site it was on but that's how I met my wife! Over 4 years on we're married and have had our first child, so for me it was well worth sifting through the chaff.

I'll not lie, I met some ladies I'd rather not have (it seems the trade descriptions doesn't stretch to dating profiles), you'll message a load of women that won't reply too, but don't get disheartened as the next one might be a keeper.

Just be yourself, if you don't like someone that's messaged you tell them and wish them all the best. Oh and don't bother with all that winking stuff, man up and send the girl a message - just don't forget to ask her some questions (other that her preferred style of underwear) that will help prompt a response.

Good luck and keep us posted on how you get on.

Wondered how long before sock girl got mentioned. The one in the pic for the ritchey trail masters on the homepage is rather fetching too.

We need a STW singles thread where we can post links to our online dating profiles, might save sifting through the rubbish 😆

Me and Mrs Windowshopper started going out ten years ago today. Now married with two kids. Thanks to Match.

[i]You misread her comments I believe[/i]

And I said as much, and thought no harm done.
🙂

[i]I think on-line dating just makes the whole thing a lot easier![/i]
And
[i]I would never go to the pub by myself, and if i'm out with my friends it's just that, to spent time with them.[/i]

The points I was thinking of too. I think some blokes might not be that fussed about online dating. But I get the impression that women like it as its a [i]safe[/i] way of interacting with men they haven't met before.
Just my opinion.

I went on Match and had a couple of strange dates, and a really nice girl who I saw for a few months. I eventually started chatting to someone who seemed perfect, and we were due to finally meet up after a lot of chatting, but the night before we met up, I hooked up with my missus at our xmas party. After having worked with her for 5 years and always admired her from afar! Had to call off the meet up with the other girl, but I'd recommend it for anyone. As others have said, there are some genuine people on there and its easy to spot the butters before you arrange a meet up 🙂

[i]you'll message a load of women that won't reply too, but don't get disheartened as the next one might be a keeper.

[/i]

That reminds me of when I first signed up. It went nuts, trying to keep up with the messages. I had to close the laptop and leave it a few days before logging in again. Its quitened down a bit now.

Mrs PJM1974 and I met through b3ta...we both knew what we were getting before we actually met in person.

She's quite lovely. Five years and counting...

Depends what you're after. Rule of thumb (I think) is that the more the site costs, the more serious the clientele. Free ones have more people after casual relationships, more expensive ones are populated with those after something a little more long-term.

A friend-of-a-friend uses POF and has 10 women on the go at any one time. And that's fine for him (and them) and everyone's happy.

I dabbled with Matchaffinity and Zoosk. Both require quite a lot of effort to sign-up with. And as the name suggests, Matchaffinity does more to 'match' its clients. Zoosk doesn't do that and you search through filters. And be warned there are a lot of desperate/odd people out there.

Met a really nice divorcee on Matchaffinty (fit, pretty, no kids, intelligent, funny) and all went well for a couple of months until I discovered how damaged she was. Single, fit, [s]sane[/s]. Turns out she'd never got over her ex-husband/love rat and was incredibly flighty.

Had more luck with Zoosk. On paper, this girl sounded ideal. Absolutley perfect. However when we met there was nothing there. Went back for a second date to be absolutely sure and sure enough... there was nothing there. Baffling. Another girl (who I'll be honest wasn't even in my 'maybe' pile) contacted me. She was too short, lived too far away and had too many kids in tow. Anyway we met up and clicked instantly. Been together 4 months now and can safely say I've never been happier.

PS @ Cynic-Al:

The long distance thing killed it after a year or so but I wouldn't have met her without online dating.

Onzadog - Member
Used to use love at Lycos and I'm now married to her. She posts on here and she's not bad on a bike.

Put so romantically 🙄 😆

But yes, ours is another online dating experience that turned out pretty well. 4 year anniversary next month (although I don't think he'll ever really forgive me for combining our nuptials in Whistler with snowboarding rather than combining it with a summer wedding and mountain biking!)

I get fed up with women who do not seem to have read my profile or selectively ignore certain parts of the criteria I've listed. The age group I'm looking at, being the most often criteria to be ignored.

If you're looking for complete eccentrics then Guardian Soulmates seems to be the place.

You may even end up being written about on the internet:

[url= http://www.heraldscotland.com/online-dating-blog ]Herald Scotland Online dating blog[/url]

Just going back to the point about women's ages - if I hadn't, errrm, "altered" my age I would not have met my beloved, as he was looking for someone younger than my "real" age. I did confess on our first meeting though!

Sorry, been out on my bike (shock horror) so catching up a bit with this thread, and well, i don't want to sound prudish or anything, but i think we should leave Hora's Beautiful Member out of this discussion, afterall there are ladies present.......... 😉

i think we should leave Hora's Beautiful Member out

I think Hora should get it leached first. 😆

[i]I think he should put it away. [/i]

He'd have to stop looking at it to do that...
😉

[i]I think Hora should get it leached first[/i]
Thats not a leach.....
😯

Beautiful member? I only said once casually that a lady once said [i]it was the best looking schlong she'd seen[/i]. When pressed(!) (fishing for a compliment) she replied that she'd seen a few- alot were overkinked/thin/small/plain ugly. To me, they all look the same - UGLY 😆

Jesus this strikes me as self-advertising and equally wrong in equal measure.

A girl I once worked with told me hers had been described as 'pouty'. I replied 'like it was kissable'? Que uncomfortable silence 😆 8)

"pressing it's half the problem"

She was too short, lived too far away and had too many kids in tow. Anyway we met up and clicked instantly. Been together 4 months now and can safely say I've never been happier.

I only said once casually that a lady once said it was the best looking schlong she'd seen.

If you're looking for complete eccentrics then Guardian Soulmates seems to be the place.

Has it got its own website yet Hora?

A Facebook page, at least?

Hora's_horror_schlong_shoker.com?!

I used OKcupid.com, and as a result I'm now married to my beautiful wife. Worked ok for the two of us, but we met some rather odd people before meeting each other.

matttromans
Hora's_horror_schlong_shoker.com?!

Or for even worse:

Hora's_horror_schlong_choker.com?

Just what would it say about oneself if one were to "like" that on BookFace??? 😉

Have you ever seen an ugly lady garden? I haven't, they all seem to be lookers 8)

(Please don't ban me!!)

Or indeed if you 'shared' it...

Thanks all. I should say I've online dated with some success quite a few times. My conundrum just now is while it would be nice to meet a lovely woman and do something serious, I'd also quite like some "fun", but I don't want t be perceived as a sleaze.

Houns - Member
Just email me notax, miss the whole signing up step out completely

Oih! This is my thread! Anyway you are have an unfair advantage of being a dating Maestro (a bit like someone at a trail centre on the best ever trial-centre bike)

Thurman Merman - Member
PS @ Cynic-Al:

Uh? I didn't post that.

EDIT - I remember someone posting up here about being an escort. Tell us your stories.

typical throw away comment

No...more a philosophical observation on how people met via internet dating generally reflect those to be met in wider society. Your interpretation an interesting lesson in perspective though.

And....

Which are far, far outnumbered by the reverse on here

Quite! 🙂

Philosophy on STW? wow, i'm impressed. Generally the only philosophy we get on here is the "i'm right, you're wrong" type (which i am btw)..............

A girl I once worked with told me hers had been described as 'pouty'

She had a schlong ? 😯