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Neighbour over the back has recently cut down a tree in his garden, which sadly means we are now treated to a princely view from our kitchen window of the fat bugger waving his wedding tackle around as he gets dressed in his bedroom.
The concept of curtains and blinds seems somewhat lost on him.
Any tips for putting an end to this glorious peep show?
Thread needs pictures...?
[quote=mrblobby said]Thread needs pictures...?
No, no, no. no. NO!
I had the same problem,posted about it on here and Junkyard said he had let him see him rubbing himself while he was enjoying the view,which had stopped the problem.
Laser pen.
Nothing would make you shut your curtains quicker than having your tadger being targeted by a sniper.
Laser pen
YES!
I did jury service for someone being prosecuted for waving his todger around in similar circumstances, though with slightly less gardening involved.
Tell him you can see him (it) and if he doesn't stop, tell the Police. Child's face etc...
Now if it were his 18 year old daughter...
You realise you don't have to watch, right?
scorecards?
Pop an anonymous note through his letterbox.*
(* not a euphemism)
The concept of curtains and blinds seems somewhat lost on him.
... and you.
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We lived the other year in a 5th floor flat, which had a view of the back of a terrace. One old lad used to go out the back door and stand there ****ing while his wife was in the kitchen.
That was odd...
IANAL, but I don't think that would work. I'm pretty sure it has to be proven that he is naked with the intention of causing offence, or something, which would be very hard to prove indeed, in his own house. Unless he was, y'know, doing a bit more than just walking around.I did jury service for someone being prosecuted for waving his todger around in similar circumstances, though with slightly less gardening involved.
Tell him you can see him (it) and if he doesn't stop, tell the Police.
So, stop looking seems a good answer. Although a note probably wouldn't go amiss, he'd probably not be too happy that he's strutting his stuff unintentionally... Personally, I'd generally be a little averse to deliberately aiming lasers at other men's penises, but whatever floats your boat I suppose...
I tend to strip naked in my back garden after a ride. I 'think' the shrubs/trees are preventing neighbourly views, but they are now looking a bit thin. No-one has mentioned anything...
I suppose if I was causing any offence, I would like to be told.
Laser pen.
Likes 😀
Or maybe a bat symbol projector of some kind?
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You realise you don't have to watch, right?
It's strangely compelling. Well, not actually, but what I've seen already cannot be unseen, any more glimpses of the underworld may cause mental scarring.
As for me having the put the blinds down, I would say the onus is on the nekkid person to pull down the shutters, as it were.
How can you be sure your neighbour isn't blind and doesn't realise the trees have gone? Your post makes the stereotypical non-disabled assumptions with worrying undertones of black Jewish gypsy homosexual lesbian whale-lover hatred as well.
Whack a leylandii in at the end of your garden.
Then topiary it into the shape of a big old wang.
Should send the right message I think. 8)
Fat middle-aged Yorkshiremen are one of the least-protected minorities out there.
whale-lover hatred
<Rings Japanese Embassy, browses Ebay for harpoons>
When you pass him in the street in your car waggle your pinky finger at him.
Just video him. Put it on Youtube (with bits pixelated) then share it on here. When it gets 1000+ views send him a card with the URL on it.
OP, how many times a day does he get dressed? Do you just stare at his window daily just to catch him in his birthday suit? Maybe stop staring into his house?
It's quite hard to avoid it 'catching your eye' when it's the only light on opposite while I'm doing the washing up. This morning he had the blind half pulled down, which meant that only his nethers were parading across my eyeline, like some bizarre art installation.
But you're right, I shall not raise my eyes from the dishes in future...
He's trying to hypnotise you with his junk!
He's trying to hypnotise you with his junk!
"look into my eye......" 😳
How low are his windows that you can see anything below waist level from your kitchen ?
How low are his windows that you can see anything below waist level from your kitchen ?
Low enough. I only need to go halfway up the stepladder.
Brilliant 😀
video camera on zoom, hooked up to a giant screen placed in your window so he can see what you see?
You might think the onus is on him, but you'd be wrong. Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, thank goodness. Stop looking or you might find the police are more interested in your activities as a peeping tom.
Don't do the washing up - problem solved!
Yep, good excuse for a dishwasher i'd say.
Definitely do the laser pen thing though, that'd be great!!
How about a brazillion lumens lamp aimed at his bedroom window. Every time he gets nekkid turn on the lamp. That might get the message across....
You might think the onus is on him, but you'd be wrong. Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, thank goodness.
You don't live in east Skipton, do you, cap'n? 🙂
I'm just going to send the wife out into the garden to point and laugh. I know how humiliating it is when she does that.
You might think the onus is on him, but you'd be wrong. Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, thank goodness. Stop looking or you might find the police are more interested in your activities as a peeping tom.
Just as there is nothing wrong with being naked in your own house, there is also nothing wrong with looking out of your own Windows.
Peeping Tom 😆
Tell him, or send the missus I think the line if I had one like that I wouldn't bother showing it off is a good one
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Looking out of your window is fine, looking into someone else's window to have a peep at their willy is not.
bigyinn - Member
How about a brazillion
😯 - I suppose they could sugggest it
Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house
Depends who's looking
http://www.dailypost.co.uk/news/north-wales-news/sealand-man-admits-flashing-denies-10526280
Do you live in a Victorian house, OP?
According to [b]Planning[/b] magazine:
[i]The Edwardians first introduced standards for minimum distances between main house windows.[/i]
[i]They were built 22m apart so that a gentleman's wife's nipples would not be visible from next door.[/i]
flaccid or not?
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Which one is your apartment?
flaccid or not?
I'd need my special peeping tom binoculars to answer that. Unless you meant me that is.
Change your wifi name to ( I can see your cock - you dirty boy )
Hopefully they'll be in range 🙂
How low are his windows that you can see anything below waist level from your kitchen ?Low enough. I only need to go halfway up the stepladder.
You do your washing up halfway up a stepladder? Can I suggest that you stand on the kitchen floor and see if that stops the view 🙂
Get some of that one way reflective film on a roll, and while he's out one day, apply it to the outside of his windows.
Derekstarship (of this parish) had a similar problem, but the neighbour was about 20. She frequently applied all over moisturiser and did stretches in full view of his kitchen window IIRC.
In my last job my room looked out over the road at the back of the school and from my desk I could see the windows of the top floor flats. Depending on shifts there would appear in my line of sight a nurse who would strip then wander round naked for a while. Id say she was about 25 years old.............and stone.
Eventually got her to stop, amazing the effect of 20teenage boys staring can have.
It really is as easy as don't look don't focus on it. Go to the far east people manage to do everything in public sight with a complete air of privacy because others simply ignore them and don't stare.
I has this same issue in a tenement flat. Mine was slightly higher than across the (one lane) road. Guy across the way streaked all the time, but he was young and good looking so it never occurred to me to complain. In fact I think there were two of them. He used to do his ironing naked in the morning with all the lights on. Not every day mind.
Then some people I knew moved in below him, could see right into their flat too. I told them the very first time, cos that was not cool, and they put some blinds up.
Go to the far east people manage to do everything in public sight with a complete air of privacy because others simply ignore them and don't stare.
The ability to stare with a horrified expression, and tut loudly, is what sets us above other nations. 🙂
Fortunately the blinds are down this morning. Makes me wonder if he's on here...
He used to do his ironing naked in the morning with all the lights on. [b]Not every day mind.[/b]
Ha! I love this.
[i]the blinds are down this morning.[/i]
It's all gone a bit...
Indeed - I had some very disappointed ticket-holders to console some mornings.
on and on - Member
Change your wifi name to ( I can see your cock - you dirty boy )
Now that is funny and mad Oi laaarf 🙂
timba - Member
How low are his windows that you can see anything below waist level from your kitchen ?
Low enough. I only need to go halfway up the stepladder.You do your washing up halfway up a stepladder? Can I suggest that you stand on the kitchen floor and see if that stops the view
Woooosh... Martin's humour wasted. Ah well... :-/
Keep these by the sink?
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I'd need my special peeping tom binoculars to answer that. Unless you meant me that is.
If you can't tell he is flacid or not from a distance, how can you see the cock?
From that distance a naked person is simply going to look like a sausage with legs wandering around in the window.
Well the cock may not be prominent enough to make a sound judgement on its inclination.
Take a picture and project it onto the back of your house.
He should get the message.
From that distance a naked person is simply going to look like a sausage with legs wandering around in the window
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Harry_the_Spider - MemberDerekstarship (of this parish) had a similar problem, but the neighbour was about 20. She frequently applied all over moisturiser and did stretches in full view of his kitchen window IIRC.
Haven't seen him on here for a bit, is he completely blind now?
You might think the onus is on him, but you'd be wrong. Nothing wrong with being naked in your own house
But surely there is something wrong about parading naked in front of an window visible to any passers by? I'm sure if you lived next door to a school or something, then police may have something to say about it, even if you are in your own home.
I live at the top of our staff village, in the bosses house, I parade around naked all the time, nobody has complained so far, although I don't often see people peering at me through their windows.
I live at the top of our staff village, in the bosses house, I parade around naked all the time
As long as you don't work at Disneyland, I'm sure that's acceptable.
take photos
open facebook account in neighbours name
use photos above as profile pic
Makes me wonder if he's on here...
What sort of tree was it?..
We had to point out to old neigbour in Sheffield that having a bathroom that faced onto the terraced steet and applying hemorrhoid cream was not a good idea - and that two other neigbours had mentioned it to us before we noticed, but were to embarrassed to say to him...
We had to point out to old neigbour in Sheffield that having a bathroom that faced onto the terraced steet and applying hemorrhoid cream was not a good idea - and that two other neigbours had mentioned it to us before we noticed, but were to embarrassed to say to him.
There is a new build up here that I ride past regularly, which is the typical concrete block guest houses we have around here, but this one has a bathroom off the side, looking at the busy main road, with the toilet on the corner. Not unusual you might think but the whole bathroom is three very large looking sheets of glass with no curtains.
Weird
having a bathroom that faced onto the terraced street
Our over the road neighbours have a front facing bathroom. It has that privacy glass in the window, so you can't actually 'see' whoever's in there. However, it does give a sort of pixellated version, and distinguishes between light and dark quite well. From which we readily deduced that she is not 'on trend' when it comes to pubic trimming.
We had to make a comment - we can avoid looking and a bit of pixellated minge is hardly worth getting frothed about anyway - but it's a busy commuter rat run, and there's an awful lot of people on the 27 bus of a morning.....
She now has a blind.
Just write an anonymous letter and wack it through his box at night. Don't send a pic as he will know which house is looking at his dangleberries.
thecaptain - Member
Looking out of your window is fine, looking into someone else's window to have a peep at their willy is not.
Daily Mail reader, are you? When the window is lit, and directly opposite, thus making it pretty much impossible to avoid, then do you seriously suggest that the OP spends his entire time in his own kitchen not looking at anything outside?
🙄
perchypanther - MemberLaser pen.
Nothing would make you shut your curtains quicker than having your tadger being targeted by a sniper.
That would be a new (second) meaning for lasercock!
countzero, no I'm just explaining the law to some who seem hard of understanding. Contacting the neighbour might work, but they are not doing anything wrong. If the OP doesn't like the view, he is perfectly at liberty to close his own blinds.
is he doing it hoping for a response ? or does he genuinely not realise
attention seeeking: if it's where other people can see it and premeditated, it can be classed as indecent exposure, get the plod to have a word
if he really doesn't realise then laser pen
Of course he's not breaking the law. He's just haunting my nightmares...
Some of the lawyerly advice extended to suggesting I was going have the cuffs slapped on for glancing out of my own window, so I'm not sure it entirely hits the mark.
Just to emphasise the true frivolity of the thread for anyone who's not quite grasped that, here's a gif. 😀
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The lawyerly advise is both voyerism and indecent exposure are offences both have a mental element that would be hard to prove for either of you.
My last similar case involved me measuring my clients inside leg and the height of his window sill.
If the OP doesn't like the view, he is perfectly at liberty to close his own blinds.
Why should he close the blinds just because a tiny percentage of the view out of the window has a cock in it? All he needs to do is draw a pair of pants on the glass.
The chap keeps moving around though. Working on the basis that my eye is inexorably drawn to the, err, chap, i plan to attach a bamboo pole to a headband and dangle a pair of my own pants on the end of that.
I thought the Telegraph claimed Skipton was the best place to live in the country?. Interesting views, at one with nature, lots going on, over friendly locals, and then there's martinHutch bucking the trend.
Working on the basis that my eye is inexorably drawn to the, err, chap
This is getting Freudian now.