You don't need to be an 'investor' to invest in Singletrack: 6 days left: 95% of target - Find out more
Our new neighbors who haven't even moved in yet but are gutting the house and in the process demolished our utility building/patio to build an extension (they have had to rebuild a new one etc all part of the party wall agreement) problem is the new building is not water tight as yet...no roof been like that for 2 months ! So I have been asking over and over again when its going to be completed as we don't want to keep wiping water from the washing machine before we use it and the plastic cover is not suffice (rain water )
This eve I get a call from the new owner telling me I'm petty I've been rude to his wife the builders and that Im ungrateful and that I should be contributing !
I kept my cool and thanked him for correcting me on my manners ! Children were present but I was dcking fuming
I have sent this email to them...what do you think ?
[b]Hi
Firstly I would like to say I'm really hurt you think I have been rude to either one of you I'm not even sure how you think I have been.
I'm sorry you think I have been petty about the washing machine I said from the very start (over 2 months ago) that it needed to be water tight neither my wife nor myself should be having to wipe water off an electrical item before using it, it's unfortunate it's been a particularly wet summer.
If I had wanted to be petty I would have complained about all the nails that were left in my garden and on the grass, I have young children that like to play in the garden and the thought of them falling onto a nail in the grass or stepping on one is not something id like to ever imagine happening to them.
This maybe a minor part of the work you are undertaking which is perhaps why you think I have been petty but from my perspective it has also been stressful. I fully understand that any building work big or small causes stress in one way or another.
I have never been rude to the builders in any way, they have been polite and friendly at all times, we have given them them tea and ice creams!
In all honesty I wish you hadn't been put in the situation that you needed to rebuild our structure but this was out of my hands.
We are of course grateful you had to rebuild the structure, there unfortunately hasn't been any opportunity to actually say thank you in person as we have not seen either of you.
I hope when all the building work is complete we can move on from this.
This is sent without any malice what's so ever [/b]
how rude, petty, malicious & hurtful. I hope we can move on from all this.
*skip to the end*
'what's so ever' = whatsoever.
Edit: Unfortunately, what George said. You might as well have finished the email with a p.s offering to wash his car with your tongue.
I think you're soft in the head. 😀
If you've already sent it then its a bit late to ask isn't it?
Not sure what tone you are aiming for here...
You're too apologetic by far. "I'm really hurt"- seriously! You're doing them the favour.
1)They need to ensure your property doesn't get damaged. You need better than plastic cladding protecting your washing machine- which uses electricity, not known for mixing well with water!- by the end of the week.
2)You need a firm date from them on when the work will be completed. If it isn't done by that point, you'll have no option but to seek legal redress.
Don;t bother with the email. You won't feel any better.
Just ask if you can call a meeting with the neighbours and the builder to come up with a plan.
Don't give into the fury - be the bigger person!
A particularly wet summer ?
Has this thread been in an intereabs wormhole for 12 months.
its sent
and apparently finished this week
s(p)melling was never my strong point !
Go round and shag his wife
definitely be rude to the wife next time - better not to leave yourself in any doubt
fiserable muckers
shag the mother in law as well to make sure
not sure my wife or his would agree to that and my wife is way better looking !Go round and shag his wife
in all seriousness there has to be good karma between neighbors last lot were dam right rude and nasty to everyone on the road
Did you take legal advice before agreeing to all this?
I assume that they had no right to demolish your old building and that you were doing them a favour?
In your position I would like to have been accommodating but would have insisted on hefty and incremental financial penalties if the work ran over time.
£100 per week in the first month, £200 per week in the second and so on. If they did not agree then no extension.
Eh ?We are of course grateful you had to rebuild the structure
Have you benefited in some way from it ?
Did you take legal advice before agreeing to all this?
yes all above board with surveyors and the party wall agreement
not sure where the wet summer bit has come from..!!? 😯
And whilst you may not have considered what you said to your neighbours wife as rude, talking about her back doors and what you would personally do to them has certain connotations..
Have you benefited in some way from it ?
well we got a new building and our old one was 80years old so have we benefited depends what way you look at it...
Try & bite your tongue.
Honestly.
Neighbourly disputes are shite.
To be honest, you lost any respect when you said 'i've sent this email' rather than having a word. If i was your neighbour i would have just ignored your email, and popped around to jizz on your washer before setting fire to it*.
*the washer, not the jizz.
To be honest, you lost any respect when you said 'i've sent this email' rather than having a word. If i was your neighbour i would have just ignored your email, and popped around to jizz on your washer before setting fire to it*.
*the washer, not the jizz.
Tbh have tried talking to them and I think what has happend is the builder has told them porkies about it being water tight etc.
HAving a word is not real world ! We have to live next door to them !
Least your neighbour now knows he calls the shots!!
HAving a word is not real world
I am truly suprised that you believe sending an email is better than talking to someone, particularly over an issue that is contentious.
we have to live next door to them !
Exactly.
Hpe it all gets sorted
As I have said earlier I have tried speaking to them for the last 2 months , met with yeah next week itll be done blah b,ah
also to the surveyor who is useless
Sending an email is documented proof if it goes any further
I'd like to see better use of punctuation tbh.
yunki - Membernot sure where the wet summer bit has come from..!!?
everyone always thinks the last summer was a wet one, not like when they were a lad, it is just a universal mental defect. Also the winters aren't proper winters. And spring? Spring! Don't get me started on spring.
congratulations that is the worst rant email ever..
your doing them the favour dont forget..
how about reposting this..
oy..
if you dont get my stuff sorted out within 48 hours i ll be round with some used mazzochis and sort your mrs out..
I was dcking fuming
I have sent this email to them...what do you think ?
I think you've done a good job of covering up that you were fuming.
People like that always blether on about their feelings and bring emotive rubbish into it - it helps them distract from the underlying issue on which they're in the wrong.
1) Make the structure waterproof.
2) Clean up the sodding nails from the garden.
3) When is this stuff going to be finished?
Poke them on Facebook?
Depending on the outcome you're after, i think that's not a bad job- if you're after reconciliation and a decent relationship with the people you're gonna have to live next door to, top job. If you're after fuming anger with the occasional unseemly outburst of shouting in the street, you should "give him a piece of your mind", as suggested by a surprising number of feisty take-no-prisoner forum members. 🙂
Poke them on Facebook?
You're responsible for the projectile porridge that's now clinging to various bits of my screen 🙂
You do sound incredibly polite and apologetic in that email. I can't believe you've been rude to anyone.
Do you have a written agreement with them over the work they're undertaking?
My email would have told them to get their act together and get things sorted or I'll start taking action.
surely, that's a banning !projectile porridge
Do you have a written agreement with them over the work they're undertaking?
yes but without any date of completion which I asked for but the surveyor said we didn't need as there wouldn't be a problem and now the surveyor has gone all sheepish he was just a money grabbing ****hole which luckily I didn't have to pay for which is probably why he's a such a useless waste of space...
Wot pondo said and also you could use all that moral high ground for a bit of down hill. Your a ****in genius.
Honestly and no offense intended. - If I received an email like that, I would consider you a spineless wimp who I could take advantage of if I ever wanted.
Honestly and no offense intended. - If I received an email like that, I would consider you a spineless wimp who I could take advantage of if I ever wanted.
In all fairness, that says as much about you as it does about him.
i have to live next to these people !
I'm neither spineless or anything else for that matter (you talkin to me ?)
I dont have the energy to have a neighbor dispute it all adds up to a big fat nothing...so yes if being polite etc makes me feel better then im all up for that at least I know i haven't been a ctnu
I think you've taken the right approach.
It's no good going nuclear at this stage.
Try adn sort it all out in a 'let's all be freinds and we can reach a conclusion we're all happy with' way.
You can escalate it from there in the future but trying to back off from 'I'll be round with a load of *really* angry IT blokes on MTB's to sort you out forthwith' is tricky.
See what happens now and go from there.
I might mention the cost of a new washing machine being pushed on to them if it's not fixed sooner rather than later if there isn't an immediate attempt to improve weather proofing after your email, though.
Don't forget to update this thread with whatever happened please. There's far too many issues that are never given resolution on this forum and it's maddening, I need to know the gossip!!
You've got a builder / neighbour who's leaving nails all over your garden and left you with a knackered washing machine - generally taking the pi%%. I'lld be taking a slighly more robust, yet still polite approach and not writting a defensive (almost appologetic) email.
[i]There's far too many issues that are never given resolution on this forum and it's maddening[/i]
+1
even if you bump one the OP rarely comes back with an update.
There's far too many issues that are never given resolution on this forum and it's maddening+1
like an unfinished book......
"Neighbour telling me I've been rude to his wife"
Well was you ?
What did you say ??
Think there was a bit of a legal fail regarding lack of completion date.
Maybe worth taking some advice on what constitutes a reasonable amount of time for the extension to be completed and your shed made waterproof, before setting a date for bomber pwning time.
I will certainly post the outcome the builders are rendering the wall as I speak and lead flashing has been added to the roof ! All this should have been done weeks ago !
Hopefully some felt later this week...
Will update for sure...
Don't know if others have said it but the email makes you sound a bit spineless, a bit 'wet'.
As for [i]If I had wanted to be petty I would have complained about all the nails that were left in my garden and on the grass, I have young children that like to play in the garden and the thought of them falling onto a nail in the grass or stepping on one is not something id like to ever imagine happening to them[/i] well you just did.
Keep it factual, cut out the mamby pamby stuff and man up.
were they sticking these nails into the ground vertically maliciously ... if so thats a police matter.
if infact they were lying on their side on the floor like a spilt nail would then only an overactive imagination would have it skewaring something.
You pitched it right, it is easy to escalate up from wimpy/reasonable to angry/firm harder to back down from initially over the top.
I think the wording is all very passive aggressive, with a pinch of lacking backbone.
Putting it down in writing in an email,instead of at least trying to explain your position over a cuppa, is a very poor method of communication when emotions are starting to rise.
IMO you have now backed yourself into a corner without giving an easy compromise. You can win on the building work but lose neighbourly good relations, or you can lose on both counts. I don't see an amicable solution following that email that provides a win/win.
reads like a Fine e-mail to me to the point , polite and offering an olive branch to the neighbours who you will have to live next to for the forseeable future - not really worth falling out with them over this , they may be reasonable and just stressed at the the minute so no need to be a complete arse with them
I would rather live next to you than all the alpha male chest thumpers on here who seem to think the appropriate response is to see who can be the most intimidating rather than attempt to resolve the issue.
Putting it down in writing in an email,instead of at least trying to explain your position over a cuppa, is a very poor method of communication when emotions are starting to rise.
I have tried talking to them asking them in for tea etc when they have been on site to try and sort this out along with numerous calls to them and Ive always had the same answer next week it be done...
as I have said earlier at least i know I've done nothing wrong
Junkyard - lazarusreads like a Fine e-mail to me to the point , polite and offering an olive branch to the neighbours who you will have to live next to for the forseeable future - not really worth falling out with them over this , they may be reasonable and just stressed at the the minute so no need to be a complete arse with them
I would rather live next to you than all the alpha male chest thumpers on here who seem to think the appropriate response is to see who can be the most intimidating rather than attempt to resolve the issue.
better not I may knock your building down and rip up your patio and get all arsey with you when you ask for reasonable demands ! thanks for the positive input.
unfitgeezer
[i]rip up your patio [/i]
Be warned J-y; ripping up your patio is the new kicking the back door in...........
On a serious note, disputes with neighbours NEVER end well. You came across as reasonable in your email. If he has any sense he will take that for the olive branch it is.
[i]I would rather live next to you than all the alpha male chest thumpers on here who seem to think the appropriate response is to see who can be the most intimidating rather than attempt to resolve the issue.[/i]
There's a huge gap between appearing to be a bit of a sap and being aggressive. I wasn't suggesting intimidation, merely appearing list week and writing that 'your feeling have been hurt'.
your feeling have been hurt'
its all about karma !
Hopefully some felt later this week
That's what his missus objected to!
Open a suitable size hole in your patio, big enough for a couple of bodies, should make things plain.
Go round and shag his wife
well aye , if someone is gonna accuse you of being rude, may as well justify it.
btw if your neighbours are like this before they have moved in, god help you when they do.
I think the wording is all very passive aggressive, with a pinch of lacking backbone.
Come on, now, you surely can't be accusing OP being a cowardly aggressive person?
as I have said earlier at least i know I've done nothing wrong
Hitler was still telling himself that in the bunker, you know? You tyrant!!!!!
Only on Singletrack..........
Your next door neightbour phones you up and complains and you write him an email? You might as well have gone round and handed him your balls in a little jar.
Do yourself a favour and start behaving like a man, rather than a 7 year old little girl.
They are taking the mick and you basically rolled over and offered your tummy for a tickle.
Now go and sh1t on their lawn to redress the balance.
Email in the OP does come across as a bit passive-aggressive/over-emotional TBH.
Better off just to arrange to meet them - much easier face-to-face (unless you're rude to his wife again 😉 ).
Well so far today the wall has been rendered and lead put up and I have received an email saying the felting will be done tomorrow
So something must have worked
Your next door neightbour phones you up and complains and you write him an email? You might as well have gone round and handed him your balls in a little jar.Do yourself a favour and start behaving like a man, rather than a 7 year old little girl.
I can smell your testosterone over the internet no really i can
Thanks for reaching round your massive plums to get to the keybaord
I hope its a façade or that one day you become an adult
indeed only on STW
kudos100 - MemberOnly on Singletrack..........
Your next door neightbour phones you up and complains and you write him an email? You might as well have gone round and handed him your balls in a little jar.
[i]Do yourself a favour and start behaving like a man, rather than a 7 year old little girl.[/i]
What type of jar would I need ? I find your post very hurtful !!!! 😯
Reminds me of Ned Flanders living next door to Homer Simpson.
I think that is an excellent email. Since ou have to live next door to these folks, I think it is worth going out of your way to get on with them. Sounding off to them, especially in writing, is a really good way to get off to very bad start.
I know that everyone is lambasting you for being too soft, but I think exactly he opposite. If I was accused of being rude, I would buy flowers for the wife and ask forgiveness.
It's so easy to end up with bad neighbourly relationships, and so beneficial when those relationships are positive, so I think it's worth falling over yourself to get on together.
Unfit - Glad it sounds like the builder / neighbour is sorting it. Get it watertight and go for the new washing machine !
If it wasn't going to be watertight for a bit why is your washing machine there?
Update !
Render painted felt laid doors on
Tiny bit of render to do...
Hoo ray !
Still not spoken to them...and doubt we will just yet