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Some of you may remember that I was looking at an alternative to bt for my elderly mother.
Anyway I got a great deal for her with sky including broadband, tv, box sets and Netflix about 4 weeks ago.
Sky has lost signal a few times now and thought it was the high winds moving the dish.
Every time I moved it back, the day after it had moved again, I've even had sky back to look at it. The engineer asked if the neighbour had moved it.
After putting a camera up to see what was going on, turns out the neighbour is leaning out of his bedroom window and whacking the dish so it doesn't receive a signal.
I'm really pissed off and especially as my mother is 76 she has had no tv to watch for 3 weeks.
The property is semi detached and the sky dish is slightly over the invisible line of the properties.
I've phoned sky and asked them to move the dish but earliest they can do it is 3rd april.
So any tips on how to deal with this idiot?
Humorous or otherwise.
So any tips on how to deal with this idiot?
Have you tried talking to them to say it’s being moved soon?
Have a word about it, find out the problem and let them know when its to be moved. If they don't have Sky ask them to go halves and get another box. Its a win win then.
Go round and explain that you're trying to get the dish moved, any reasonable human being would accept that. If he persists after that super glue his window shut.
If he is able to whack it with his hand from his window you may have blocked his view without really warning or discussing it with him. Being a neighbour isn't easy and it's not all about invisible lines
Would it not be considered a criminal matter? Granted its not arson but surely it is crimal damage? Have you confronted the neigbour?
Is she a bit deaf by any chance?
Go round and cough on them.
Ask them?
If they deny show them the footage
Cough and spit on the dish,
And then bum his dog.
Paint the side of the dish he can reach with anti climb paint or some thick grease? Granted that might aggravate the situation!
Put his windscreen wipers up every time he knocks the dish.
And then bum his dog.
With frozen sausages, if they haven’t sold out.
Frozen sausages + hammer + lawn.
Some great comments here. Don't think he has a dog though.
After three weeks of moving the dish, he has finally posted a note through the door asking my mother to get sky to move the dish.
I've replied and told him that I've arranged to get it moved on 3rd april as that's the earliest they can come so I would appreciate it if he could put up with it until then.
Also told him that he should have just knocked on the door with his concerns instead of keep moving the dish. I would have sorted it earlier if I'd known there was a problem.
What's the best way to stick photos up here? I have no idea.
Then stw can be judge jury and executioner
WTF is wrong with people nowadays? If your mums neighbour had just come around and knocked on the door after the dish had first been installed all this voice could’ve been avoided. I’d definitely bum his sausage and nail his dog to the lawn though
I know about the bog roll shortage, but this is definitely time to treat yourself.
Shit down his chimney.
ITOLTBU.
Don't think I want to bum his sausage.
There's a lot of sausage japes being suggested. Have you all been tested for the virus?
That's a bit of a wurst-case scenario.
With a semi-detached property, the line isn't usually invisible. It may not be physical but it's location is usually pretty obvious. Knowing how touchy people are about their boundaries, it was a bit naughty of the installation guy not to tell you what he'd done. If he'd asked the neighbour first this would never have been an issue because either the dish would have crossed the line with permission, or the dish would have been installed wherever it's going to be installed on 3rd April.
Like "un-written rules", the general assumption is that unmarked boundaries shouldn't be broken (or crossed in this case).
Shame for your mum, who did nothing wrong but has had un-necessary grief.
Hopefully here is an image showing the dish.
Or maybe not
I know this has been done already as I heard about it on the news and seems effective - shoot him through the head with a cross bolt.
Hopefully here is an image showing the dish.
I think it's been moved - can't see it 🙂
is the nighbour the one with all the photo panels ? (**** him!)
The disk looks a bit like it's on an articulating arm and is folded over his way - could you swing it away from him a bit ?
https://potatoes1971.tumblr.com/post/61330116776896102 4"
My mother's house is on the right
The dish is on a swing arm and when the neighbour moves it so it's not on his property, the signal stops.
All a bit petty really as all he had to do was ask
... but when he swings the arm out the dish will be pionting in the wrong direction - you'd have to realign it after swinging it out. Unless there's something massive behind the point where the photo was taken from I can't see why it wouldn't get a signal from the new position
(What a petty arse.)
Buy a hot air balloon and learn to fly it so you are constantly casting a shadow over his Solar Panels.
RM.
Bet the neighbour wouldn't do it if next door was 6'4" and male. Can't the arm supporting the dish be set at 90° to the house and the dish reset, thus putting it on her side of the divide. Neighbour is a ****t
would cost too much to buy a hot air balloon along with learning to use it.
I’d rather pop his crappy inflatable hot tub he has in his garden.
So, what type of sausages should I be using just in case he gets a dog?
(What a petty arse.)
thought that said "pretty" - I can report that nothing's visible in either window though 🙁
I'd punch him in the mouth.
Is your neighbour called Louise by any chance
H Block protest on his PV panels.
So, what type of sausages should I be using just in case he gets a dog?
A kielbasa for the dog or 200 chipolatas for the lawn.
Maybe a nice 240V buzz will discourage future re-alignment.
Why’s he got black gutters the ****, completely mismatched with the fascia boards. You should cover his solar panels in clear varnish.
Climb on his roof and kick his aerial, worked for Rod Hull or emu.
I’d rather pop his crappy inflatable hot tub he has in his garden.
It looks well over the “invisible “ line so Sky guy is at fault. However, neighbour is an asshat for not just mentioning it. Suggest you p*ss in his shoes.
Bum his hot tub.
Crossbow?
Move dish. Plant leylandii
You dont need a sky engineer to move that dish , any tradesman with a set of ladders and an sds drill could relocate the 4 masonry bolts holding it up if you want it done sooner.
But yeah neighbour is a petty spiteful knob for moving it
Hammer sausages in to his hot tub
that dish , any tradesman with a set of ladders and an sds drill could relocate the 4 masonry bolts holding it up if you want it done sooner.
Do you reckon they should move it 6" to the left..?
How unbelievably petty! I’d arrange for the mounting arm to be swung around to stick further out from the wall, with the dish re-aligned to pick up a signal. That way it would be away from the property line, but would intrude further into his line of vision.
That might teach the stupid s.o.b that being petty about something that isn’t important can have unintended consequences.
Cough on his dog.
Get the dog to bum him.
P1ss in his hot tub.
Go home & have a sausage sarnie.
Move it yourself or get someone in to do it, as brownsauce says, only 4 bolts and there is plenty of space and a clear view of the sky below your mums window, no need for it to be within reach of the git next door:)
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CountZero
MemberHow unbelievably petty! I’d arrange for the mounting arm to be swung around to stick further out from the wall, with the dish re-aligned to pick up a signal. That way it would be away from the property line, but would intrude further into his line of vision.
That might teach the stupid s.o.b that being petty about something that isn’t important can have unintended consequences.
TBH that sounds quite a lot more petty than somebody moving something that was put over their property line without their permission, then repeated moved back over their property line without speaking to them.
Don’t think he has a dog though.
Buy him one
Then bum it.
Piranha in the hot tub? Lose weight the quick way.
How abour i send you a 25kg bag of malted barley
Sow it every day on the solat panels
Within a week the local feral pigeons will move on in. Thry will build a big old nest and crap all over his panel's
Might be a bit noisy but if your mum is like my mum she won't hear them anymore
Cheapest solution - collect some dog urine and burn a message into his lawn.
Replace the sky dish with one of these (the dish, not the other one from Wayne’s World).
and glue his dog to it (after you’ve bought him one)
Bum his lawn then own his hottub with bombers.
Make him a sausage sandwich. But use vegan sausages and don't tell him.
God forbid the poor baztid should in the future want a sky dish in that same area ..... just sayin
Wait a couple of weeks until coronavirus really kicks in and there are no police, then nip round and do whatever you want.
What CZ said.
Climb on his roof and kick his aerial, worked for Rod Hull or emu.
🤣🤣🤣
So, he hasn’t got a dog eh...
Even better! Get your dog to bum the neighbour with the sausage.
In glum times, this is vintage STW- thanks for the Sunday evening smiles everyone.
just tighten the bolts to the max.
Hammer frozen dogs into his windows so they can’t be opened. Dachshunds are bred specifically for this type of situation.
Edit - into the frames not the panes, that would be ridiculous.
Poke a burning sausage through the letterbox.
Fire some fresh dog turds into the hot tub.
Fill his gutters with leaf mulch.
On a serious note, sky should reposition the dish for free, other tradesmen may not be as cheap.
Ours (dish, not tradesman) is stuck up on a mast, so it is above any and all windows.
Shitty thing for your neighbour to be doing but also stupid of Sky to position it like that
A full day has elapsed and no mention of Bombers as far as I can see. STW really is going downhill...
Fill his hot air balloon up with sausages.
A full day has elapsed and no mention of Bombers as far as I can see. STW really is going downhill…
You are correct.
Jam up his sausage machine with bombers
Smear sausage meat on his bomber stanchions
Bum his dog with bombers
Clean your bombers with his dog
Hammer bombers into his lawn
Hide his bombers in your hot tub
^ Did it way better. Bravo.
sausages are the new bombers
Fire frozen sausages of wee into his hot tub with your homemade crossbow fabricated from a pair of old bombers and your mums knicker elastic
Assuming his mum wears... erm, never mind.
In defence of "stw", jekkyl bwned the thread yesterday:
jekkyl
Subscriber
Bum his lawn then own his hottub with bombers.
Posted 19 hours ago
Sausages are the new Bombers.
I'd still punch him in the mouth though.
Move to Spain "the people are so nice there" you don't even have to bother learning the language everyone speaks English anyway.
Just as a point the alignment of a dish is easy to do if you move it yourself to a better spot. One of my old tenants had a dish that the builders took down. I put it back up and got it working fine. the vertical angle is already set on the mount, the direction you can get as a compass bearing - that allows you to get a signal and then the TV will monitor the level of signal to allow you to fine tune it by moving it tiny amounts. worked for me.
Previous neighbours kids had an inflatable hot tub and had parties until the early hours. A bucket of crayfish lobbed over the fence sorted that out.