Need to vent. In-laws content

Are your in-laws aged 13-17...cos they sound like a pair of stinky teens!!!

DrP

I am sure it will be ok go for a ride or something unfortunately we all get old.

Why are they there again?

(This is why my house does not have a guest room)

Inlaws. Can't live with 'em, can't burn 'em

Well this thread made me google Anzac biscuits - they look nice, maybe I'll try baking some with my daughter.

Don't tell your FiL though.

Enjoy the solace of the shed.

Goes off to google ANZAC biscuit...

Checked the list of ingredients I'll make some tonight

48 in two days would be a stretch even for me though , and I am not a stranger to the biscuit tin

me and my mates have a saying for this...

'Do something or **** off'

You can't put music on in your own house?  "How about deal with it or **** off"?  Are there perhaps any adults in the house you can get to ask them to behave themselves?

How long are they there for?

Sorry Aphex_2k, they sound appalling.  You are showing the patience and tolerance of a saint.  I would be either at work, on my bike, in a shed 0r out with friends.  I wouldn’t be at home.

I had a wonderful mother-in-law and a father-in-law was a pain in the arse.  They luckily only lived the other side of the city - so did not have to put up with two-week stays.

Can you introduce some venomous wildlife into their bedroom? Might make them move on more quickly.

For the love of all that is holy, why would you end up in a situation where you'd have the outlaws staying for 2 weeks?

Surely that can only end one way...

48 in two days would be a stretch even for me though

TBF, the FIL only had 46, kids had one each!

Not sure why I'm assuming 2 kids.

Yup, MIL came up “to help out” wife as she’s broken her arm and I had a biking weekend booked for 6 months, all paid for. They fell out on the first night, then she stayed in bed all day Saturday and did F all to help on the Sunday. I cooked a roast dinner on Sunday after I got home and she ate two forkfuls before saying  she was stuffed. All she’d had to eat in two days was two pieces of kid size toast and half a bit of cake. Was supposed to be staying until Monday afternoon but thankfully her partner turned up at 11 to take her home.

Thank god she only comes up twice a year. Oh yeah, it’s such a long way to come for her, but expects us to visit her all the time.

Just give them a bar of soap each, say nothing, then walk out of the room.

What possible reason could there be for such an extended stay? And possibly more importantly, how long until they leave?

That sounds insane. I'd have stabbed someone by now (probably myself).

Oh yeah, it’s such a long way to come for her, but expects us to visit her all the time.

The phrase you're looking for here is "managing expectations." 🙂

What possible reason could there be for such an extended stay?

They live in different countries?

I get on well with my other half's parents... but having anyone staying in your house for two weeks is hard enough... the older generation doubly so.

I’d be more worried about what you’ve married!

wink

i spent 2 weeks with my in-laws a while back, had a week at home then they arrived for a month’s stay. It has been good.

I am surprised

good luck aphex

Surely that can only end one way…

Coke and pavers?

No way would any visitor in my house be telling me to turn down/off my music, or anything else for that matter.
If they don’t like it, they know what they can do.
And if they don’t know, i will gladly explain it to them.
Regardless of who they were.
In exactly the same way as I wouldn’t go to someone else’s house and expect to dictate what was being watched or listened to.

That sounds rubbish op. I hope they improve, leave or both.

I might have some ( non existent) mates hounding me for a bike ride most days if my in-laws were like that.

I'm lucky they are not

I am not a stranger to the biscuit tin

That is an excellent phrase. I fell indeed to get it on the biscuit tin to keep me out the biscuit tin

http://theoatmeal.com/comics/venting

48 ANZAC biscuits in 2 days?!!?!?!?!?

Rookie numbers, though thanks for introducing me to ANZAC biscuits.

I get on quite well with my inlaws.

There is no danger of them staying , or even visiting, as my wife fell out with them around 8 years ago and hasn't spoken to them since. I keep in contact for the sake of the kids , which ironically are the reason for the fallout in the first place.

9/10.

Enjoyed that rant. They sound repulsive.

A fortnight! How are you letting them stay for a fortnight? Decent rant, not enough swearing, random caps or rage induced grammatical errors 7/10

OP hasn’t returned to the thread - too busy burying the bodies perhaps!?

I'm lucky that I've got great in-laws. Live on a farm with them, though when we were doing our barn conversion here we lived in a motorhome rather than the farmhouse! Think I'd manage a few days at best nowadays in their actual house. Probably even less with my own parents tbf!

Why don't they shower? I'll occasionally skip a day, but 2 weeks, Jesus.

ANZAC biscuits and reference to 10pm......I'm guessing the OP is posting from Aus?

Are your in laws locals or imported poms?

Lots of dodgy creepy crawlies in Australia (and then there's the insects!) . Accidents do happen.....

Miss Anzac biscuits, though it's a bit late in the season to be selling them- are they an all year round thing now?

Tell them there's a local infestation of the drop bears or spiders or some such and they should get a room in a hotel for their own good.

Well this thread made me google Anzac biscuits

aka Hobnobs.

Christ. I think I'd have buried them or myself long before two weeks.

Why are they there?

Re ANZAC biscuits I made my own successfully  in a very short time. Using this recipe https://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/anzac-biscuits

I only managed to eat 5 though . Given the easy recipe and short time required I have concluded that it would be within his rights for the OP to tell his father in law to "Go and bake your own ******* biscuits!"

Seems like this is EXACTLY the situation that thallium, arsenic, and hemlock were put on the earth for.

Just had a look at that BBC biscuit recipe, and my mum used to bake tins full years ago! She wasn’t a great cook, old-school English cooking, but those are a piece of cake to make… *mutleys*****

She sits at the dining table – in silence. I can’t put music on cos “she can’t hear herself think!”.

I’d be putting music on, as and when I want; I get a complaint, “my house, my rules. You want quiet, go outside and think”.

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My in laws are great bit we still have a rule of max 3 days together or we'd kill each other.

Bill Bryson: House guests are like fish; nice when fresh but they go off after three days

Or words to that effect.

I love my in-laws, they all live in Brazil.

My first year as an apprentice I was told before you marry always look at the mil and think ahead 25 years, I never took that advice but after 17 years I'd had enough

An expensive mistake but lucky escape for me

This is one of the best posts i've read on here for a while......regular updates please!! 😀

A day since @aphex_2k started this thread and no reply.

He's either been arrested or is on the run! 🙂

#prayforaphex

I'm alive. And so are they.

Today, after getting back from dog training at 1930.... FIL says "what's for tea?"

I said there's leftover cold meats and veggies from the Christmas In July party.

"I'll make a chip butty"...........

He did some food shopping today though. Went for a massage at the Chinese place at the shops... Came back with a small tin of pineapple and a packet of Penguin Biscuits. Random, as we have Tim Tams, I've never seen Penguins on sale here.

Lack of showers, still. It's so weird. My wife said "Mum said it dries her skin out". I said her dry flaky skin, we're breathing her!!!  EWWWW   On a plus note, we've really not had to do any extra cleaning in the bathrooms, which is nice.

Some of the comments here. Gold 🙂 Thank you.

How long have you got them for?

Ha having a shower dries her skin out!!!

Fair play, you seem to.be coping admirably.

We were renovating our Victorian cottage and at one point could see clouds and sky from the ground floor kitchen as the roof and ceilings/floors were all removed.

PIL's asked us if we wanted to move in with them for a few weeks........5years later we eventually finished the house and moved out. It was great and we all loved living together it just took longer to do the house than it would have done living in it.

I'd love to get on with them, I just can't. Today he was talking at me about how all the immigrants get everything and some Muslim bloke in Rochdale. I don't know as I just zoned out.

I've dried out all my tools and stuff from the shed that got soaked when he left the doors open.

Oooh... another thing MIL does which I can't remember if I whinged about. She touches everything, and moves them a tiny bit. Example. Hairbrush on table. Walks in, touches it, moves it 5mm, walks off. Oh... Here's a classic. We have a Tupperware drawer with all the plastics in, each thing with the lids on, as it should. She removed all the lids and put them at the side, and then all the boxes in random piles. I replaced all the lids. Just spotted they are separate again!

They're here for a month. They go next Tues. Fair to say, Kool FM has been playing some crackin DnB a lot recently. Congrats to myself for not succumbing to beer/wine/whiskey as a coping strategy. (Thus far!)

I can do this...... :s

They’re here for a month

And as far as you know, they haven't washed in all that time?

Just spotted they are separate again!

Put them all back as you like them, but superglue one of them down.

Plastic spider (a big one) in one of the tubs.

And as far as you know, they haven’t washed in all that time?

Well, funny you should ask. My FIL just went in the bathroom and it sounded like the shower was running.

I'm gonna say yes, he's showered. But also he's just put on the clothes he's (probably) slept in last night, worn all day and now wearing again... It's 2330 now. Actually I'm pretty sure he was wearing them yesterday before I went on shift! (a little ewww methinks).

Plastic spider (a big one) in one of the tubs.

Ah, we have enough spiders mate. Bloody winter here, they all come in the house. 😀

When they leave say what I say to my folks......"it's nice when you visit us but nicer when you leave"

Ah, we have enough spiders mate. Bloody winter here, they all come in the house. 😀

In that case, use a real one. If they're also lodging in your house, might as well make them useful 😀

Just put a post it note on top of the tupperware with **** right off written on it

"I love you to bits, but right now you're making it very hard"

Usually works.

Certainly better than a claw hammer and 10 stretch

having a shower dries her skin out!!!

Oh my...its a shower, it doesn't need to be a chemical rinse unless you make it one....

@OP I admire your stoic mindset

I once had a bit of a 'cook out' social event at my house...a few friends bring food and drink etc and we cook something up based on what random stuff people have brought...

One 'friend' felt the need to vocalise, that he didn't at all like that one (technically 2) of my kitchen cupboard doors have to be opened and closed in a certain order, to close properly, as it's a corner cabinate...

After a few seconds of confused disbelief, I simply said... well, if you ingore the fact one door has a handle, and the other doesn't, you have a 50/50 chance of getting it right... may the odds be ever in your favour!

That seemed to settle the debate. Hahaha!

I’d be blasting the MiL with a hose and then throwing a bar of soap at her. Also placing miniature bear traps in all the Tupperware. She sounds like a right dick.

It’s 2330 now.

Are you Buck Rogers?

”you smell bad, keep ****ing with my Tupperware collection and your husband doesn’t share his biscuits with his Grandkids. **** off”

That’s better than the other nonsense

Inlaws. Can’t live with ’em, can’t burn ’em

I do live with my MIL, and we definitely can't burn her because of her permanently attached Oxygen line. If you think a phlegmy FIL is a problem, try a MIL with COPD.

Another one that leaves bowls and cutlery in an inch of tepid water to brew up new and interesting bacteria. The sink is directly next to the dishwasher...

Did you get the camper trailer in the end? Perhaps you could suggest they might be more comfortable in there? Away from the loud music and running water.

You could drop a few hints too. Tell FIL the joke "where does an Englishman hide his money?"

All parents, In laws passed away. Life is better without them and i know that's a dreadful thing to say

My MiL is a horrible person.  Once a year we go and stay and i go on a big ride, maybe 100km plus.  When she comes to stay i go on a big ride, maybe 200k.  See the patern?

I think you should see how long you can keep the Tupperware game silently going on for before she snaps and says something. Just keep putting them back.

Anyway... why do you keep them with all the lids on anyway? Takes up so much more space. We have a basket in the drawer with all the lids in it standing on their sides, and the containers stacked together. By size, not randomly, but still. This way it takes up half the drawer instead of all of it.

It's a massive, deep drawer. Heaps of space to have them correctly placed.

I kinda like the Tupperware game. I'm going to look now to see where we're at......

.....    Lids not on again.

Lids now back on.

This morning I tried a different approach. I said the dog stinks like he'd rolled in a poop. "Ohh you stinky thing, do we need to put you in the bath and have a good soaky woaky you" *arf arf*

Joke's on me though, Wife told me the dog stole the cats food this morning and puked up 3 times. You'd think MIL would have mentioned that? Still no shower. They've gone to lunch and I've got back from the dentist so I... sadly, couldn't go with.

How long have they not washed for? I need a shower just reading your post. Also, how many of you weirdos have a Tupperware drawer? What year is this, 1986!

Off topic, what's the point of an organised tupperware cupboard?
Where's the exciment and danger of opening the door and not know if you'll be picking it all off the floor on a minute.
It like Schrödinger's Jenga.

Nah , I get it . All the pasta , noodles and food that comes in a plastic bag that self destructs when you try to just cut the corners off . Decant into tupperware pots with lids for product management and longevity.

Not sure where youd get them from, maybe an old nan's shop, but those nan-sized bars of soap in flowery wax paper, get a couple of them to put on their pillows each.

And yeah it is weird keeping the lids on tuppawere. Not only do you lose or on the jenga game but also the infuriating but ultimately joy filled (on success) of trying to match the lid to the box.

Not only do you lose or on the jenga game but also the infuriating but ultimately joy filled (on success) of trying to match the lid to the box.

To misquote Mrs Doyle... "Some of us like the misery"

We have a drawer full of tupperware/takeaway containers that we use for left overs lol!  Fullness depending on how many are in the fridge/freezer with stuff in them.

For space many don't have the lids on which is a PITA for matchup at times.

Such a shame you had to have the house all to yourself after the dentists OP lol!

it is weird keeping the lids on tuppawere.

I have it in my head that Tupperware stored with the lids on harbours 'stale' air and starts to smell, whereas lids off has fresh circulation.  This may be abject bobbins that I've made up at some point.

I hate the stuff.  We have a cupboard full of mismatched tubs going back years.  Of particular hilarity are ones from different brands which are almost-but-not-quite the same size, so the wrong lid will fit on one tub but their counterparts won't match. I'd thrown the lot out and start again with a known consistent brand if I thought for a second that my partner wouldn't immediately run out and buy random ones again.

how many are in the fridge/freezer with stuff in them.

Anything going into the freezer goes into baggies.

We just use old takeaway plastic trays, although the two different takeaways we use seem to have slightly different size trays and lids. We're not posh enough to buy actual tupperware branded items.

Also when we're running low it makes a good excuse to get a takeaway.

I like to stack them and organise them, my family like to throw them in the cupboard and slam the door before they all fall out 🙁

We use ours for leftover food and sauces kept in the fridge. Also for the kids cooking at school when they need to take ingredients in.

Take away containers and lids - my wife has taken to numbering them so that its easier to find the matching lid and container...

Take away containers and lids – my wife has taken to numbering them so that its easier to find the matching lid and container…

This is the level of genius I come to STW for.

Nah , I get it . All the pasta , noodles and food that comes in a plastic bag that self destructs when you try to just cut the corners off . Decant into tupperware pots with lids for product management and longevity.

Then you end up like my mother with 3216 tupperware boxes filled with random bits of food, no idea of the best before date and no easy way of checking what the food is in the first place.

She will buy a box of Weetabix. The nice yellow rectangular box, instantly recognisable in a cupboard as being Weetabix.

The stacked paper/foil things of 12 biscuits each get removed from the bright yellow easily identifiable box and put into - get this - a *cylindrical* tube-type tupperware container. Which doesn't fit properly into the cupboard containing cereals because it's ****ing cylindrical so it gets put 4 cupboards over, down there.

There is no rhyme or reason to this insanity. Tupperware has it's uses as maybe a lunchbox or a "there's some leftovers, I'll put them in here for one day".
Otherwise it can **** right off.

All these folk on here that may have hosted or attended Tupperware parties, upstairs will be where all the Ann Summer lingerie lies only used once

To be fair, single use lingerie is the best kind.