My mums things keep...
 

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My mums things keep going missing in care home

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Over the last 12 months my mum has had two sets of hearing aids (around £1,200 set) go missing. As she has dementia she cannot put them in or take them out herself - one of the carers does it. At first we thought that she may have just lost them but this week the care home called to say that not only had she lost another set but also the charging case had been lost. This got me wondering if there is more to this? Apart from another £1,200 is there anything we can do? We don’t want to move her to another care home as she is to fragile.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 11:48 am
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Care homes are sadly full of people with dementia who wander around picking things up thinking that they're theirs and sometimes hiding them to 'keep them safe'.  Not really much you can do about it IMHO


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 12:02 pm
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Posted by: natrix

Care homes are sadly full of people with dementia who wander around picking things up thinking that they're theirs and sometimes hiding them to 'keep them safe'.  Not really much you can do about it IMHO

this is our experience. Lots of my mother in laws things go missing, usually it’s other residents. Was a bit upsetting for my wife when the mother in laws wedding ring went missing.

 


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 12:09 pm
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Also undertrained and underpaid staff working under great pressure.  Its much more likely to be staff losing them or your mum taking them out and putting them somewhere than another patient.  This is NOT to excuse it but to explain it.  

One patient should NOT be wandering into anothers room on a regular basis.  If they are the home has big issues

I suspect the home has some liability for this and needs to replace them but getting them to do so is going to be a fight.

hearing aids and dentures were the bane of my life when working in care homes - they just keep on getting lost.  Usually in bedclothes that then go to laundry.  I seem to remember the home having to replace on occasion but cannot remember for sure.  Have you had a good search in her room?  Down the sides of the bed or behind the beside cabinet is a good start.

 

I would set up a meeting with the manager and chat to her about it.  this is unacceptable.  Once may be OK - twice is not.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 12:16 pm
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Airtag glued to the case next time? If it's another occupant I bet the case will end up in the same place.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 12:21 pm
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My mother in law would lose things before she went into care, including wedding rings and hearing aids.  And false teeth!


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 12:45 pm
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What TJ said+1


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 1:03 pm
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Not wanting to make light of this… but I can recommend watching “A Man On The Inside”.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 1:13 pm
gray reacted
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Put a complaint in as these are medical aids rather than personal belongings. MIL had things like rings & necklaces taken


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 1:44 pm
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This is quite sad to hear, and as mentioned above, residents shouldn’t be wandering into each others rooms.  The starting point might be to see what the contract of service says about personal possessions and medical aids, ie, who is responsible if they go missing.  It’s not your fault, and it’s quite the sum to cough up, and keep coughing up.  There really ought to be a system of storage and managing the use of expensive kit. 


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 3:07 pm
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Posted by: rockhopper70

residents shouldn’t be wandering into each others rooms.

In principle, correct, however a totally unrealistic expectation without 1 to 1 care.

It's impossible to prevent without locking residents doors, and locking doors would prevent the majority accessing their own rooms.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 3:19 pm
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As already said. There will be other residents walking around picking things up - and people with dementia may not be able to understand how to fit or use hearing aids - but that won`t stop them pulling them out of their ear and dropping it somewhere.

And whilst some residents will have pressure mats by bed or doorways to alert staff to a resident up and about - the ratio of even the best care homes will often mean care staff may not to immediately respond to a resident if they are already busy.

Maybe have a word with care home manager to alert care staff to your mum taking them out. Unfortunately it sounds like an all too common issue caring for our elderly loved ones.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 5:16 pm
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Posted by: rockhopper70

There really ought to be a system of storage and managing the use of expensive kit. 

The storage won`t be a problem; I`m sure they can be kept when not in use, at night, in a locked office. However, I would expect the hearing aids would still get lost during day time. Its not like they would only allow the person to wear them when in the supervision of a carer .. halfway through watching Escape to the Country and they get taken off the resident because the carer has to respond to Mrs Smiths door monitor alarming .. hardly ideal eh


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 5:25 pm
 ton
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same at place my mum is in.

hearing aids, glasses, slippers, ladies battery shaver thing for granny whiskers.

all replaced all gone within a week. we dont replace stuff now. mum doesnt notice. hated her hearing aids anyway.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 7:23 pm
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My mum hides her stuff all round the care home. And had acquired plenty of other residents clothing! Really hard to manage, even with good staffing levels, as her home has. 


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 7:40 pm
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At my late mother in law’s care home, a resident used to collect false teeth from other residents. The only way that staff could work out who they all fitted was by comparing them with photographs!

Stuff went missing all the time, people with dementia like collecting things and are very crafty..


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 9:51 pm
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Posted by: dave_h

In principle, correct, however a totally unrealistic expectation without 1 to 1 care.

Sorry - I ran a dementia care unit in the private sector.  Its perfectly possible to prevent patients wandering into others rooms and not to do so is a serious breach of duty of care and that was at minimum legal staffing ratios.  If they cannot then the home is not properly run.  This was my work world.


 
Posted : 03/10/2025 10:28 pm
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OK - then please explain YOUR understanding of what is the minimum legal staffing requirements at dementia care units. And then explain how a dementia care or nursing home would legally and practically prevent residents going into other residents room?

 

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 8:52 am
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Minimum staff levels are 5 to one in the day and 10 to 1 at night with one of those being a registered nurse.  Thats a legal requirement for care homes

 

the care home has a duty of care to keep patients and their possessions safe.  Its not good enough to say " patients with dementia may wander in and take stuff.  You must take reasonable steps to prevent loss and to protect patients safety.

 

there are many ways of doing this.  direct observation - electronic alarms, building design etc etc

I ran care homes and dementia care units.  I took this stuff seriously and it simply was never an issue

 

If patients are regularly wandering into other patients rooms then the home is failing in its duty of care.  One off incidents would be subject to an incident report which must be acted upon to prevent further instances.  Repeat incidents are not acceptable


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 9:49 am
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Posted by: tjagain

I ran care homes and dementia care units.  I took this stuff seriously and it simply was never an issue

You haven't actually told us how you did it with a minimum of five staff in often sprawling buildings that were more likely designed for non-dementia patients .... if as a care home at all.

Let's be clear, starting from scratch with a new building is rarely an option, so what were the reasonable steps you implemented to prevent this from happening whilst keeping it an affordable care option?


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 11:04 am
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I have.  there are a whole range of measures as I said.   All of which I have used

 

one is to have direct observation ie one member of staff on constant watch

 

one is to use electronic devices to monitor patients that can tell you when they leave their chair or bed or can also be used to monitor entry into rooms.

One is to use the built environment from secure storage to how the buildings are used

I managed both dementia care units and care homes in the private sector all running on minimum legal staffing.  I am trained to a high level in dementia care and the law and ethics surrounding.   I trained others in dementia care

 

it does not discharge your duty of care to say its too difficult to do this.  Your duty of care is absolute and must be done.   it's up to the management of the home to ensure they meet their duty of care.    one off incidents are acceptable assuming a proper review is carried out and steps taken to prevent  reoccurrence 

 

What's your expertise to say this duty of care dies not exist and that loss of property is acceptable?

 

edit.  another mitigation is to understand why the people with dementia are behaving like this and use behavioural techniques to change this.  Wandering and picking up things is NOT random or purposeless.  There is always a reason for the behaviours and finding the root cause can lead you to mitigations.  Of course its not always possible to find the cause but it is never purposeless 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 2:36 pm
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Posted by: tjagain

Minimum staff levels are 5 to one in the day and 10 to 1 at night with one of those being a registered nurse.  Thats a legal requirement for care homes

OK. So your understanding isnt that great. Do you know there is difference between care home and a nursing home requirements?

 

Posted by: tjagain

the care home has a duty of care to keep patients and their possessions safe.  Its not good enough to say " patients with dementia may wander in and take stuff.  You must take reasonable steps to prevent loss and to protect patients safety.

 

there are many ways of doing this.  direct observation - electronic alarms, building design etc etc

I ran care homes and dementia care units.  I took this stuff seriously and it simply was never an issue

Whilst I do agree care or nursing homes have a duty to keep residents and their possessions safe. The homes can demonstrate this by using floor or door sensors, and if the level of risk requires, then the resident may be 1:1 ... but patients walking into others residents room will not typically necessitate that; that becomes needed if there is a risk of violence attached. So, by demonstrating the home are taking reasonable steps to avoid a resident going into anothers room then that is typically enough. I have yet to meet any care or nursing home manager who doesnt take their duty of care seriously - and its good practice to ensure any restrictions are proportionate to the issue. 

 

As said. A conversation with the care home manager may help by bringing to the care staffs attention. 

 

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 2:59 pm
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Posted by: tjagain

What's your expertise to say this duty of care dies not exist and that loss of property is acceptable?

You seem to assume everyone believes it’s acceptable.  The point of the thread is an exactly that question.  The common consensus is that it’s the reality.

My own personal experience is none but my wife works in a specialist dementia unit and lives this reality day in day out, through a mix of true carers and agency staff where it’s just a job.

For many others, it’s the reality of parents in the situation.

Posted by: tjagain

one is to use electronic devices to monitor patients that can tell you when they leave their chair or bed or can also be used to monitor entry into rooms.

It feels like that would just enforce control “Get back in your bed / chair” to avoid staff constantly chasing from room to room.  Clearly your experience is something else, even with minimum staffing levels but seems to be the exception rather than the rule.  It feels like there’s a business to be had there in sharing your best practice for the good of those in dementia care.

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 3:03 pm
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Of course if you have risk assessed properly and put mitigations in and it still continues you need more robust mitigations in place.  these may be expensive or onerous on the management of the home.  There is a reasonableness test of course as in any duty of care / negligence situation.  It could be that the persons issue is so acute that the normal mitigations are insufficient.  Its not as simple as once is acceptable but twice is not.  However a continuing pattern of loses is not acceptable.

Because I understand this and am appropriately trained and despite working in specialist dementia units this has never been an issue in any home I worked in.  Occasional one off incidents yes.  That will always happen.  a pattern of continuing incidents - no because you risk assess and put in mitigations and continue that cycle until the issue is no more

Staff or the person themselves losing the item is far more likely anyway from my experience.

 

Patients simply put should not be wandering into other patients rooms on a regular basis - thats a huge unacceptable risk and would breach the duty of care

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 3:04 pm
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Posted by: dave_h

The common consensus is that it’s the reality.

 

Not in any care setting I have worked in.   to say its just the reality is to excuse poor management practises

 

There are folk out there with far better credentials to train folk than me.  Unfortuatly even the senior staff in care homes are often badly trained and lacking in proper dementia acare skills

Posted by: dave_h

It feels like that would just enforce control “Get back in your bed / chair” to avoid staff constantly chasing from room to room.

Neither is the correct response - the correct response is to validate, distract, redirect and to monitor  Of course that often is not the reality given the poor level of skills.  Poor standards of skill and training need to be challenged not accepted


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 3:11 pm
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Posted by: e-machine

Do you know there is difference between care home and a nursing home requirements?

 

As far as I am aware there is no such legal distinction any more.  All are "care homes"  Maybe thats a scotland only thing?  It used to be a split between residential homes and nursing homes.  Now all are care homes in Scotland

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 3:25 pm
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Posted by: e-machine

The homes can demonstrate this by using floor or door sensors, and if the level of risk requires, then the resident may be 1:1 ... but patients walking into others residents room will not typically necessitate that; that becomes needed if there is a risk of violence attached.

 

there are a whole load of mitigations between those two extremes.  This was my professional world for many years.  Whats your expertise?

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 3:27 pm
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My MiL has dementia, and she has taken to hiding her own things, including the hearing aids and pretty much everything else. You never know where you might find a pint of milk. I wouldn't necessarily assume that it's someone else taking things.


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 3:49 pm
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Seems there are different types of care home. Some provide hursing care others don't. So it seems appropriate to refer to care or nursing homes whether or not that is the official title.

"Care homes that provide personal care offer help with washing, dressing and giving medication.

Care homes that provide nursing care have at least one qualified nurse on duty 24 hours a day to carry out nursing tasks. Personal care is provided too."

https://www.careinfoscotland.scot/topics/care-homes/types-of-care-home/

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 5:18 pm
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At my late mother in law’s care home, a resident used to collect false teeth from other residents.

My Nan was suffering really bad mouth ulcers. Care home phoned - she was wearing someone else's teeth !
Makes me gag thinking about it. 

 

Good luck to the OP.

 


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 5:22 pm
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IRC - it would be wrong to call them nursing homes.  all are care homes.  That goes back decades


 
Posted : 04/10/2025 5:26 pm
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Whilst Scotland (I wasn't aware that Scotland did this differently too) have grouped all care and nursing homes into one title as TJ correctly states - it does not appear to actually change anything in the bigger picture from what I can see. Some care home in Scotland still only offer care from care staff (typical care homes) and some offer care with a registered nurse on site (nursing care). Staffing level is still required depending on needs of residents.

I previously did some locum for the CQC. At times visiting, assessing and completing investigations at various care homes. 

As others have corroborated - care homes are busy environments, with staff often dealing with a multitude of tasks at the same time. Staff will prioritise and will undoubtedly provide a proportionate response to each residents issues as best they physically can. Things getting lost or residents walking into others rooms will be safely managed, but inevitably it can't be stopped altogether (unless risk necessitates of course).


 
Posted : 05/10/2025 7:49 am
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Okay, hearing aids, the NHS ones aren’t bad and comparable t £1200 private. If you can find a high street provider of NHS aids, such as Specsavers, who will do a home visit, they are free. Replacement cost when lost is £75 each.

They won’t be rechargeable so the staff will need to change the batteries.

Be there when come and find out how to change the tubes and domes, and how to check they are working.

When they play up you don’t need to call out the audiologist you can ask for the replacement parts (tubes and domes) and sort yourself. If they pack up you can take them in and they will reprogram a new one FOC.

Good hearing is a factor in keeping dementia at bay/reducing its increase.

FWIW I ran a Specsavers hearing business in Oxfordshire when AQP (any qualified provider) started. Out of it now, but it’s a really good service, but getting home visit is difficult, ring around, and there is probably a long wait.

Take her in if possible, and may as well get a sight test.

Edit- mark them with a sharpie or something 

 


 
Posted : 09/10/2025 6:26 am
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Posted by: wheelsonfire1

At my late mother in law’s care home, a resident used to collect false teeth from other residents.

Clearly a resident with a gap that needed filling. I wonder if they collected the full set to crown their achievement?

 


 
Posted : 09/10/2025 6:49 am

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