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Just a quick PSA aimed at men of the Brut generation. It is no longer acceptable to wander around the changing room naked with your plums swinging on display. Not since the 80's has it been acceptable to try and engage people in conversation with your towel draped over your shoulders and nothing else on. I do not want to talk to you when your pecker is out.
The modern day etiquette that you should adhere to is this. It is only acceptable to be naked during the short time gap between drying your genitalia and putting you pants on. This should be no more than 5 seconds and should not involve conversation unless it is somebody you already know.
Thank you.
and at no point is the hair dryer to be used down stairs either
Do you shower with your shorts on? I get the not speaking thing but really are you that uptight?
And don't sit on a slatted bench either....
Wasn't there a post on here a year or so back where some bloke was shaving himself (down there) in the hand basin of a gym changing room ? 😆
What is it with the younger generation that they are afraid to be seen naked in the changing rooms. Too much namby pandering to them if you ask me. In my day .......
Towel flossing permissible?
we are all naked under these clothes.
OP you really are a sensitive little wall-flower..
MTFU as the saying goes.
OP wants to do it his way
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Isn't it simple - don't want to see people naked, go somewhere with indiidual changing cubicles, don't care, join a gym with shared changing.
I think it is an age / parenthood thing - just wait ten years and you'll not give a damn about who sees your bits in public either. If you think about it rationally, it is pretty weird of you to be so freaked out about seeing a cock - what exactly is it that you're scared of?
I think it is an age / parenthood thing - just wait ten years and you'll [s]not give a damn about who sees your bits in public either.[/s]be happy anybody sees you naked
I'm with Frank. By all means get changed in a communal setting but have a bit of modesty and decorum.
No word of a lie two bigger sized early 20's lads came into the swimming pool changing room the other day and just dried themselves off whilst still wearing their wet shorts, then put a top and coat on and left! Water still running down their legs as they made their way out of the changing rooms. 😯
How did you know they were bigger sized if they kept their trunks on? Were you checking out their packages?
repression stemming from being brought up in the era of paedogeddon..
I think anyone who has ever played team sports would probably not worry so much about this?
I think anyone who has ever played team sports would probably not worry so much about this?
no need to get that friendly...
I'm guessing the op has never partaken in a naked bar.
NAKED BAR!!!
(Too early?..)
(Too early?..)
Its never too early for a NAKED BAR!
OP needs to try going to a sauna in Austria!
jamie.............that cartoon is fantastic, 😆
Are we getting those awkward boners OP?
See I don't see the problem with this, you're in a communal changing room, people will be naked, get used to it or get in a cubicle. It only a bit of slightly dangy flesh, I don't see the problem.
I have played plenty of rugby and other team sports but still have sympathy with the OP. Happens a lot where I swim with the most unlikely looking (?!?) being most on view. I am often thinking, please put it away. The worst case is a regular morning swimmer who compounds the nakedness with very noisy and dramatic ablutions every morning. I am not sure which turns the stomach more!
But kids generation do seem a lot more prudish these days! No showers or showering in trunks after sport!! Big change from my school days with cold and supervised ( 😯 ) showers!!!
Grum, are you looking forward to that in ?. Certainly takes getting to use to ladies lying on the benches with legs akimbo!!! Very un-British. My wife was not sure why I wanted to use the saunas!!
The outdoor pool I use for my morning swims in the summer, has a mixed communal changing room. There are separate cubicles as well, but they're not heated. As the average age of morning swimmer is about 80, I have learned to just stare at the wall at all times.
A kid actually did get a boner in one of our post PE showers in school. One awkward moment and it was 3 or 4 years of hell for him.
DD, you really must stop refering to yourself in the third person....
and at no point is the hair dryer to be used down stairs either
You haven't tried this, have you? One of the most luxurious feelings evah.
and at no point is the hair dryer to be used down stairs either
Guy used to do this is Greens in Edinburgh when I went there.used to lift a leg upon the bench to get the hot air right in the cracks.
and at no point is the hair dryer to be used down stairs either
How else am I supposed to get my perm to set?
I got some weird looks when I used my GHDs (well, it does take a while).
I'm wondering if there's some middle ground to be found here.
Maybe there's a market for willy hijabs, so that the john thomas is always modestly dressed, thus avoiding inflaming anger or passion in other men.
OP what ever you DO NOT take a summer holiday in the eastern part of Germany. 🙂
Dear God, OP are you really that precious?
😛
Good god this is sad. It's a changing room. That's where you strip off, wash yer balls and get dressed. In my footy days the young lads were initiated into the team with a bit of changing room antics. I ended up getting chased naked by our, also naked centre half around a football pitch with him threatening to shove the corner flag somewhere.
Ok anything physical I accept wouldn't be condoned these days but if you can't scrub yer balls in a shower then you are the one with the problem. I expect your also scared if your kids see you naked in case it embarrasses you.
Never heard anything so stw as being offended in a changing room about people using it as it was intended
I take it the OP has never played Sunday League Football?
Testicles everywhere
OP wouldn't like a lot of the French sports changing rooms then. All the ones I've been in are open plan, with a door opening onto a corridor. Non of the 'visual U-bends' that we have here.
The doors didn't even have springs on. From memory, the female changing rooms were similar.
Non of the ridiculous British prudishness.
How's the poor OP going to cope showing with exposing his meat n 2 veg to a GIRL in a few years when he starts getting interested in them....? 😉
Think the OP as been changing in the Cottaging type dwellings
Try re reading my op. I'm not objecting to people being naked, I just don't like people strolling around chatting to me whilst they are naked.
I'm typing this naked , does that help ? 😀
I just don't like people strolling around chatting to me whilst they are naked.
Are you struggling with eye contact?
I think my buddies get a bit uncomfortable when we stay in bunkhouses. I wear nothing in bed, so the guy on the bottom bunk gets especially uncomfortable as I negotiate my paunchy elderly carcass up and down the ladder to the top bunk.
He probably doesn't like getting rained on either, but that's another problem with age.
I think part of the problem is that penis size is reducing with every generation and the guys in their 20s this means that they are getting a complex about their microscopic willies. 😆
Avoid Denmark too
Naked showering compulsory before swimming there.
Young men preening themselves in the mirror, hilarious. Went to the gym a couple of months back and one man in his early twenties was sorting his hair out in the mirror as I walked in after spinning. I got my stuff, got showered, got dry, got changed and he was still at the mirror as I left. His hair couldn't have been more than an inch long too.
As for standing around chatting with your wanger out. I like to air dry. It's more hygienic.
Has the OP thought about asking the offender to modify his behaviour? Wrinkly balls might not even be aware others find his routine uncomfortable.
Try re reading my op. [b]I'm not objecting to people being naked,[/b] I just don't like people strolling around chatting to me whilst they are naked.
Yes you are ?
It is no longer acceptable to wander around the changing room naked with your plums swinging on display.
OP you sound a bit up tight.
You trying to repress something?
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Prude.
Don't try spas in Germanic countries or your eyeballs will fall out (TBH I find all that unself-conscious female nudity a bit much for my nerves).
franksinatra - Member
Try re reading my op. I'm not objecting to people being naked, I just don't like people strolling around chatting to me whilst they are naked.
I can understand where youre coming from, after an incident many years ago, still have trouble listenting to people talking to me in changing rooms,especially when naked. 😳
Do the descent thing and wait until your thong or mankini is on before starting a conversation.
Bet you get upset at me tea bagging the dyson hand drier aswell.
Reminds me of my Dad - a keen footballer - telling me the rules of post match etiquette when they still had the big old communal baths instead of showers.
1. You do not drop your soap.
1. In the unfortunate event of you dropping your soap, you DO NOT go looking for it....
The OP should also be glad he never worked for the NCB where it was quite the norm to wash each others backs after a shift down the pit. Have to admit that as a young lad washing the back of some 50yo whilst his prune sack pendulumed between his knees took a bit of getting used to 😯
Bet you get upset at me tea bagging the dyson hand drier aswell.
Hope it's not an Airblade. Risk losing them.
Do communal baths still exist anywhere? They were great as long as you were not last in.
Despite that, still agree with the OP. I really don't want someone else's tackle right in my face/line of sight. It's all about balance - hmmm, now what does that mean? Ditto ladies in the sauna - no, no, no. The old advice is best, legs together please. I don't care if you're European 😉
I hope the old guys don't mix he hair dryer with the swimwear dryer!
Maybe this is all link to some repressed 'issues' that I do, or should have about my tackle. Sat here watching Africa on BBC 1 with the kids and it got to the bit with the Naked Mole Rats. My 5 year old just announced:
'look, that looks like Daddy's penis!'
Just in case you haven't seen Africa this week, this is a naked mole rat...
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Had plenty of communal baths in my time. No issues with losing the soap. It's the guys who hide the soap you have to worry about.
Generally in the who gives a toss camp here (fill your boots innuendoists) but I did find it a little OTT at our small village pool the other week when the bongly woman from the next village spent 30 mins (no exaggeration) naked in the [u]poolside[/u] shower rather than one of the empty ones with a curtain in the changing room. What has been seen etc...
Frank.
Does your penis have claws? 😯
Reminds me of my Dad - a keen footballer - telling me the rules of post match etiquette when they still had the big old communal baths instead of showers.1. You do not drop your soap.
1. In the unfortunate event of you dropping your soap, you DO NOT go looking for it....
I wish someone had informed the guy in my gym who knocked on the door of my shower cubicle asking to retrieve his soap.
Laughing out loud at this thread!
Soap Retrieving.
I love a bit of that.
OP are you repressed or scared you might find it attractive?
Jesus I used to towel-whip others at school and even unsuspecting friends now. It was hilarious hearing the shrieks and screams...and bomb burst away. Mrshora knows to be wary and a friends wife threw a pan in the air whilst cooking :O
Ive also been hit on. Didnt bother me. Feel comfortable in your skin fella.
Frank.Does your penis have claws?
It's the protruding teeth that's got me worried 😯
as long as they aren't doing the helicopter in your direction I don't see what the problem is? It's only a penis?
Spinnin it by shaking the hips? I Do that in my naked hakka dance
To bo honest, it's one of the few things I'm looking forward to about being an old codger
Spinnin it by shaking the hips? I Do that in my naked hakka dance
Isn't a hakka meant to be intimidating, rather than magnificent?
It is quite a magnificent thing to behold, especially when performed by someone quite experienced in the ancient art of helicopterereering.
although - doesn't your willy shrivel up when you get old? There wouldn't be much to wiggle?
I don't think the OP sounds as if he is either;
...repressed or scared you might find it attractive?
Or not
...comfortable in your skin fella.
He has just suggested that people might be a little more considerate and less exhibitionist in a shared environment. With me, I prefer not to see everyone else's tackle. Nudity for me is a more private thing - hence when I change I do it with a degree of modesty. This has nothing to do with how comfortable I am with my body (Whilst I could do with losing a few pounds!) or latent homosexuality - I would like to think that if I found men attractive, I would have done something about it by the age of 38...
It is quite a magnificent thing to behold, especially when performed by someone quite experienced in the ancient art of helicopterereering.
Waving wones wanger awound is an ancient art? Learn something every day.
Jamie. Im good at it. It hilarious especially with the hand/sideways stance swinging etc. Always gets a laff 😀
Oh and the fore-aft stomach slap 8)
although - doesn't your willy shrivel up when you get old? There wouldn't be much to wiggle?
C missing there.