I'm not sure if this is a regional thing, but what is your default term for someone you interact with, whose name you don't know, to whom you wish to convey a friendly demeanor?
It's always 'mate' for me. Also useful when chatting to someone in a group whose name you should know, having been previously been introduced but have forgotten!
I don't mind being called mate by complete strangers. It's friendly, welcoming, convivial. 'Pal' on the other hand...
I've no idea why, but for some irrational reason I get mildly irked when someone calls me 'pal'. I know it's not intended that way, but to my ears it always sounds a bit disingenuous, sarky even. I do realise this is all in my head and it's my issue, I just think it's interesting how we sometimes react to certain words in an irrational way.
I grew up in Chester (though long since left) where mateists were the majority but where there were a sizeable cohort of palists.
Bud, or buddy if it's a formal situation.
The accepted term here is "big man".
Kind Sir
Squire
Bud, or buddy if it’s a formal situation.
I quite like that, but does feel a bit faux 'merican.
Fella or chap
The accepted term here is “big man”.
Norn Iron? I like that. I lived there for a while and heard it a lot. Often preceded by 'what about ye...'.
Awright flower
I'm west coast of Scotland but I believe it to be popular in most of the central belt. And obviously in NI too!
NB - "big yin" is also socially acceptable.
Duck or ducky around here (luckily Im not from around here!)
Duck or ducky around here (luckily Im not from around here!)
Nottingham or surrounds? My commiserations! 😉
If it’s a delivery, bus, truck, taxi, uplift or train driver,
“Cheers drive” or just “drive with a nod” That’s definitely a local thing. “Mate” otherwise.
Yes “Pal” also seems to be a bit not quite right to me also. Mainly due to An altercation with a very drunk person in Scotland once. But that’s a whole other story.
If it’s a delivery, bus, truck, taxi, uplift or train driver,
“Cheers drive” or just “drive with a nod” That’s definitely a local thing.
Brizzle or south Wales?
Ive frequently been called big man. But I'm 6ft3. Is there a cut off height?
Treacle or big boy - depends on the exact nature of the interaction.
Mucka, butt,pal, bro, dude or mate depending on where I am.
Darling
Nottingham or surrounds? My commiserations! 😉
Edge of Derby - its actually a convenient location to live for getting round the country with good riding as well. And Im not from here either! 😀
I quite like that, but does feel a bit faux ‘merican.
All Americans are faux, it's not a real country, let's face it, all their national foods are stolen from other countries and most important places are just named after some foreign place.
NTSC
You, Sir!
And Im not from here either! 😀
Yeah, I think you did mention that. Noted! 😀
Fam, cuz or bredrin.
If anyone calls me 'chap' I shall rip their limbs off and feed them to piranha.
If a female style of person calls me mate, it always feels a bit weird.
Don't know why that should be though.
I generally go for mate but then do have a good friend who I often call pal just because when we dated we visited Scotland and had such a good time that its a nod back to a nice trip and he does the same. Interested as to whether you all go for mate or pal for female friends too or do we get greeted more formally? fairly sure I'd be offended by fella! I'd accept fella more than 'love' and if you refer to me that way I may have to try to inflict some damage!!
Homes,
homeslice,
homies (plural),
blade.
Mate, buddy or marra
Pal is usually reserved for a more forthright approach
Pal feels a bit aggressive for some reason, possibly related to a film or TV show. Mate is used for acquaintances, bud or buddy for friends.
Bud, buddy, fella, dood. Possibly Jimmy.
Dood, squire or fella for me, - I'm useless at remembering people's names
Mate for me, pal definitely is more localised to certain cities, scousers etc.
Where I grew up round Tottenham and Edmonton, Mate was said with a smile, and Pal was said with a stoney face.
I imagine it like this...
"You're not really supposed to park there mate, but it should be alright if you're quick"
..or this...
"You can't park there pal, move or I'll move it for you"
However Pal feels completely friendly in other parts of the UK
Pal always comes across as aggressive in a "what you looking at pal?" kind of way.
Mate is fine but I detest the use of matey. Chap also riles me for some reason.
Pal is usually reserved for a more forthright approach
Pal feels a bit aggressive for some reason
“You can’t park there pal, move or I’ll move it for you"
Pal always comes across as aggressive in a “what you looking at pal?” kind of way
This is the reassurance I was seeking! Glad it's not just me! Genuinely interested in all the variations and trying to guess where they are from.
@golfchick I would use 'mate' for female friends, but strangely not for someone I'd just met the way I might for a male. Not sure why, it would just feel a little bit overly familiar I suppose. Though no clue why it wouldn't for a male? Weird.
"I’ve no idea why, but for some irrational reason I get mildly irked when someone calls me ‘pal’."
This. It always feels like a prelude to a punch. I really dislike bud or buddy too.
In all honesty i think i avoid any of those terms, and either use people's names or nothing.
Marra, pal or mate.
Possibly Jimmy.
I was in the Milton Hotel in Fort William (now the Ben Nevis Hotel) at the SSDT back in the 70’s & a very drunken Scotsman says to me, ‘what’s ya name Jimmy’?
Unsurprisingly he didn’t seem surprised when I told him it was Jimmy.
If it’s a delivery, bus, truck, taxi, uplift or train driver,
“Cheers drive” or just “drive with a nod” That’s definitely a local thing. “Mate” otherwise.
Said Cheers Drive to the pilot when we disembarked last week. Gave me a funny look 😂😂
Bud, or buddy
Anything but this.
Where I grew up round Tottenham and Edmonton, Mate was said with a smile, and Pal was said with a stoney face.
I'm from that neck of the woods too originally, totally agree. Now living in one of the country's biggest pal hotspots near Mcr. Took me a few years to stop bristling when people called me it.
Mate for me generally. I ****ing hate chap!!🤬
Bud or buddy round here if you know each other.
The more formal "mi duck" if not previously introduced.
Aye, Duck or Love.
I’d accept fella more than ‘love’ and if you refer to me that way I may have to try to inflict some damage!!
Oops.
Up here everyone uses 'love' when addressing a female, small child, any close family member, or a female is addressing a male.
It's so common that I tend to notice if it's not used.
It has no connotations of intimacy or lecherousness, honest!
It's just seen as friendly, which is very, very important around here. 🙂
'Mate' for blokes speaking to blokes. 'Fella' is used as well, probably if it's someone you don't know or aren't sure about.
'Pal' is seen as slightly confrontational, not particularly respectful.
I still use 'Sir' or 'Madam' if it's a person of a certain age or someone in a job where they are providing a service.
Squire
Normally associated with doffing.
Normally associated with doffing.
Not necessarily so. In some places dahn sarf it is used between peers. A couple of mates from Essex call each other and everyone else 'squire'.
Not necessarily so. In some places dahn sarf it is used between peers. A couple of mates from Essex call each other and everyone else ‘squire’.
Indeed.
Usually used semi-ironically in a mockney accent, but it basically just means "mate" and often has no deferential connotations.
Though the stereotypical usage is a market trader or tradesman saying: "Fifty quid to you squire."
mate or buddy interchangeably with a sprinkling of pal thrown in depending on where i am geographically.
when i grew up local terms were either monna or mush
Butt
Lad.
Lass.
"Butt" round here.
Mate - that's everyone, male, female, known, unknown, boss, wife, kids, todo en el mundo.
Keeps things simple.
Butt
Newport?
“Butt” round here.
You're in the wilds quite a bit north of Newport, iirc?
I quite like Cornish "My 'andsome".
Gadge.
I always appreciated Marra when I had a job on the NW corner of Cumbria, am I right in thinking it's use extends over to the north east too?
I tend to favour Chum, but that's a me thing and not regional. We have a small cohort of Pal's where I work from some contractors who are from Wigan.
'Mate' is what I use. Or 'Love'.
'Pal' can be used either way: 'Hey, how are you doing pal?' or 'You wot, pal?' Depends on the inflection.
The 'marra' officianado's are, I assume, Cumbrian?
I have never heard 'Butt'
‘Pal’ can be used either way: ‘Hey, how are you doing pal?’ or ‘You wot, pal?’ Depends on the inflection.
Exactly and this is my issue with it! The ambiguity of it is ripe for misinterpretation. The palist might think his inflection makes it perfectly clear how it was meant but does it? Does it really? You know exactly where you are with 'mate'
Edge of Derby – its actually a convenient location to live for getting round the country with good riding as well. And Im not from here either! 😀
Do we know each other?
This thread would definitely be improved if people were more geographically precise than 'round here'
Context, innit.
I have a friend who calls everyone 'pal,' there's no aggression there. I'd similarly use mate, not least because I have a terrible memory for names.
Coming from a stranger, 'pal' could be antagonistic. It feels like something that would follow a direction: "look, pal..." or "here, listen, pal..." But I guess that's more about delivery than the word, sunshine.
It's a quirk of British English, we can insert random gibberish all over the place and it still makes total sense. "Yeah, I went out last night with Kev and got absolutely trousered. You know Kev, he's hatstand when he's had a couple of sherbet lemons. Tell you what though pal, I was Fairy liquid this morning."
a small cohort of Pal’s where I work from some contractors who are from Wigan.
Bingo.
Weird how it's so hyper-local.
Used to be Fella for me. But i do a military style fitness bootcamp run by army PTI's, and at the end of the session would often say 'thanks fellas' or similar until one took me aside and told me that where the C word is so widely used in the military it has lost all value and so they need something worse. So 'fella' has been retasked
Avoid if the recipient is or may be military.
I use pal, mate or bud(buddy). And even though I'm borderline West Cumbrian I don't use marra.
This thread would definitely be improved if people were more geographically precise than ’round here’
Owa yon
This thread would definitely be improved if people were more geographically precise than ’round here’
Up the road, obvs!
Alright Spa!
Safe or wot bruv?
I find that pal and bud wind my up almost as much as someone calling me son. I prefer to go with bro or brosephine if it's a lady.
My Devonian wife always assumed that folks in Essex, such as myself, called each other geezer.
First time she went to the pub with me in Chelmsford.. "Oi, geezer, got a light?". That is the only time I've been referred to as such.
(Geographical precision: pub was the original Prince of Orange - I'm sure some of you have been there and not remembered 😉
Mate for me. Hate Pal.
Really enjoy the scouse "Lid" in exchange of "Lad". As in "aright there Lid?" although a lot of scousers use Lad as well.
shermer75
Free Member
This thread would definitely be improved if people were more geographically precise than ’round here’
Half way between Binners, who lives in Ooniville and Cougar, where they still wipe their arses on each other.
And about 3 miles North and 50 years ahead of STW Towers. Keep banging the rocks together guys.....
A couple of mates from Essex
Essex ??. Well anything to elevate their perceived social standing 😆
Meht/mate/matey, pard, shag, ansom, lover...is standard here in Kernow.
I tend to go with meht, mate and bud though
Bud, buddy, fella, dood. Possibly Jimmy.
Well I'll tell you.
I was surprised when I moved to Scotland that they use "Pal" but now its default and "Mate" feels wrong and forced.
Buddy & Chap can get in the sea.
In South Cheshire I go for Duck, Liverpool it's La, mate or as I'm in construction it's just sparky, joiner , plumber or whatever you do. North Wales mates go for pal a lot. Older ladies it's love, dogs it's buddy, I don't talk to cats.
@orena45 - last person I heard call another pard was my Papa in about 1988😃. Do people still say it? He was from down west, but when I’m in Cornwall it’s Newquay so not really indicative of what Cornish people say.
A few fisherman friends used to say ‘my ansom’ back in the 90s but they were being ironic I think.
I go with bud but I my start saying meht jut to mix it up in the Midlands.
Comrade
Really enjoy the scouse “Lid” in exchange of “Lad”.
Is that not bin lid ➡ kid?
Aaaright argh kid?
@bsims - whasson pard. Bleddy right - not common, but not uncommon innum
😁
Not a fan of any of them tbh. Happy to use that sort of thing with a friend but generally don't stick to one word. To a stranger? Not really something I do. Just tend to try to be polite and avoid mate/pal/bro/love/duck/etc.
Once knew a guy in uni who used "pal" in every sentence, whether he knew someone or not. Annoyed the ever living .... out of me and has kind of influenced me ever since.
To the extreme that Line of Duty was almost unwatchable for me with all that false mate Chat going on. Grr. 😉
