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Good grief there are some humdingers on TV. Some of these seem to be made recently. There must be a whole industry based around crap festive films. For the most part actors you never see anywhere else. We had a cracker on yesterday, I think it was called Lost for Christmas, anyway it was on iPlayer. If you want a great example of the genre well it’s right there waiting for you.
I avoid like the plague.
Exception was the one last year with Anna Kendrick. Because Anna Kendrick.
There must be a whole industry
Its called "Hallmark Films"
https://www.hallmarkchannel.com/movies
Its also the answer to "what happened to Gretchen from Mean Girls"
And Sabrina from Sabrina the Teenage Witch
There is absolutely a whole industry pumping them out and it is very profitable for them.
They are along the same lines as genre romance in that there are very specific character arcs and storylines that the audience want to see, and certain beats that need to be hit, otherwise they won't be happy.
There's a lot of people out there who want a very specific formula delivered to them consistently in slightly different ways.
That's why they are all variations on roughly
Stressed career woman with big city job
Goes back to hometown
Meet handsome man of some description
Learns true spirit of Christmas
Its also the answer to “what happened to Gretchen from Mean Girls”
And Dean Caine, Teri Hatcher, and there's a couple with Meghan Markle pre-Suits. To be fair, she stands out as an acting talent in a sea of dross. Kevin Sorbo popped up in one today, mad in 2012.
MrsMC and I often have them on in the background just to take the piss, and play Hallmark bingo:
Stressed city woman returning to sleepy home town.
Handsome handyman
Bonus points if former sweetheart
Someone owns a diner/cake shop/cafe/ event planning business
Former (or current) partner turns up seeking a reconciliation
Unlikely fake snow
Even more unlikely prince from obscure European country defying his parents.
They are great fun if you don't take them seriously. They are still making them as well, a colleague at work was touring a German castle where they were filming one last year.
MrsMC did find one on Amazon which revolved around a gay couple, though the two guys fell into the same cliched scenarios. That was actually an interesting watch, I'd never seen a gay romantic movie before.
21 "different" Hallmark films in this image.
As other have said, they all have a very similar plot. My wife seems to enjoy watching these. The other day she even said "I'm not sure if I've seen this one before". I though she just had the same film on repeat.
The Mrs watches this dross.
It's shockingly bad and repetitive.
usually same storyline too, girl/boy goes away, comes back, then it allbecomes magical with love in the air.
channel 4 have been releasing an advent calednar of films to stream, went big on day one with home alone..
There was one on TV yesterday, where it was clear the Director had wanted Reese Witherspoon for the role, but only had the budget to go to Temu. From certain angles there was resemblance, however she was the standout worst actress in what was a pretty tough category.
20. One of them is in there twice…
At first I though you were playing an evil game, but you are correct. So similar that even the people making the images don't notice.
My mum loves them... so I've seen a few when visiting... some are actually fun. Although I couldn't tell you if they were actual Hallmark films, or just in that market. There seem to be plenty that are filmed in Ireland with a USA connection.
Had a great conversation with the receptionists at the dentist this morning about these films. Consensus was they were so crap they were good.
You should watch them in reverse, then it's a story of a woman in an ugly christmas jumper who dumps her well-meaning but dull boyfriend, moves to the big city and gets a successful law career. Much better.
Lost for Christmas isn't a Hallmark one, it's a Scottish one and is a massive step down in quality. My wife's American and we both kind of enjoy the chewing gum Hallmark films, they're a real guilty pleasure.
But Lost for Christmas is absolutely bloody awful.
Curiosity made me Google Lost for Christmas. It has Clare Grogan in the cast list - how bad can it be?
Hallmark bingo:
Stressed city woman returning to sleepy home town.
Handsome handyman
Bonus points if former sweetheart
Someone owns a diner/cake shop/cafe/ event planning business
Former (or current) partner turns up seeking a reconciliation
Unlikely fake snow
Isn't that the entire plot of Gilmore Girls? With an added town full of ****wittery.
These don't look good. Anyway, Gremlins is a low budget Christmas movie. Does this count?
The wife has had them on via Netflix for the last couple of weeks.
The one she was watching yesterday had Jill Wagner in it*, her off of the US version of Wipeout.
*This does not narrow it down at all! https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1489978/
Isn’t that the entire plot of Gilmore Girls? With an added town full of ****wittery.
Which my wife also has watched in it's entirely at least three times.
Stressed city woman returning to sleepy home town.
Handsome handyman
Bonus points if former sweetheart
Someone owns a diner/cake shop/cafe/ event planning business
Former (or current) partner turns up seeking a reconciliation
Unlikely fake snow
Yip. Mrs B watches all this dross, which she openly admits it’s utter brainrot. She says it’s good to have on when you’re pottering around cooking, or whatever, as you don’t have to concentrate as they all have the same ‘plot’. When I enquired what that plot was, she described the above pretty much word for word.
She’s also watched Gilmore Girl's repeatedly. I guess its just the menopausal woman’s version of the manopausal males 6 Music?
How many Christmas films do you reckon there are where Nicholas Cage says the line “I just wanna get back to my wife and kids” when the snow has grounded all the flights, there are no rental cars left and he has to paraglide/paddle board/hitch-hike his way across America in time to spend the big day with his very photogenic family?
20? 30? 50+?
I guess its just the menopausal woman’s version of the manopausal males 6 Music
I'm slightly concerned it's meant to be a reminder to their manopausal partners that they want some romance in their lives.
It's not just Hallmark movies, there's Lifetime ones too. Equally absolute pony. Definitely well worth avoiding.
@MoreCashThanDash - is she a high flying corporate barrister who’s just driven her Porsche back to see her parents when it develops a phantom mechanical problem?
Are you a folksy, down-home motor mechanic from Idaho with fantastic cheekbones and a penchant for wandering around showing off your muscular physique in a wifebeater and Stetson? Who just happens to be passing in your old pick-up when she breaks down and you stop to help and despite the smart power suit and expensive accessoriesyou recognise her from school?
Any of those TV movies on Channel 5. Can't even stand a few minutes of it, everything/one looks like something out of 90's catalogue. I'd rather debowle myself with a shovel.