[Closed] Limp handshakes

Walk away. Horrible.

I hope you crushed his hand till he visibly winced and then gave the bride a knowing wink?

Never mind political correctness, you don't seriously judge people based on grip strength do you?

If you do you are a simpleton.

very upper middle class

Relevance to the limpness or otherwise of the handshake?

Just the usual inverted snobbery?

I hope you crushed his hand till he visibly winced and then gave the bride a knowing wink?

You are Lord Flashheart and I claim £5

Jesus I am asking for guidance not judgement...

Guidance on what?

I'm sure Jesus has a vice-like grip. I remember something about the right hand of God.

I thought all the cool kids were fist bumping.

You are Lord Flashheart and I claim £5

He's been promoted from Captain? 😐

Totally with you OldMan, v poor form to have a limpy-shake irrespective of class. How was his speech? if that was a bit limp too, then in my book I wouldn't be keen and be reckoning the marriage won't last.

One doesn't like to use the title. One gets judged so harshly.

😉

For real snobbery at weddings - hired coats, any man made fibre, single cuffs, matching waistcoats (esp if not silk), cravats and non-morning dress outfits on men, in particular those Nehru collar numbers. Evening dos and American weddings are excepted, shorts only if in S Hemisphere or Caribbean.

I used to have to work with Mercans, they used to love bone crushing handshakes. I had 4 fractured bones in my right hand so I could either man up before then walking out of the meeting that'd been organised for me or do the even more annoying thing of turning the hand over on them and see how long they'd manage to go before letting go. It's all full of shit, I hate shaking hands because of the inadequate ****ers who feel the need to "dominate".

The only time grip strength should be a concern is if you were considering a reach around in the orangery.

Have you considered that maybe he was not too overjoyed about having to touch you? 🙂

inadequate **** who feel the need to "dominate".

Jeez, some of you lot really overthink stuff...

Dominance & other such Alpha displays? Only a problem if you let them be.

A firm handshake is a far more pleasant way to greet someone than handing over something as limp as a soggy fishfinger.

Firm is fine, proper even. You can tell when someone tries to put crush your hand and it's stupid, actually it's a bit disrespectful IMHO. It doesn't establish any kind of dominance, it just marks the bloke out as a dickhead.

Over powerful handshake is almost as bad as a limp handshake. One is macho bs on their behalf, the other just makes my skin crawl. However a normal handshake when the other person thinks they need to stare you in the eye is also peculiar

Plus being a climber I have caught a few people out when they tried it.
Normal handshake is all that is needed, and yes all of the above has made me doubt giving roles during interviews

Shaking a limp hand is like shaking another limp body part...that's not your own. Fine if you're into that sort of thing, but not if you weren't expecting it. The early grippers are annoying too, wait until hands are engaged please.

It just ain't right. We were always told at high school never to trust a man with a limp handshake or who walked without moving his arms. Almost 25 years later, that rule has never let me down.

You are Lord Flashheart and I claim £5

Both limp and bone crushers are wrong. The latter seem to be more prevalent these days. I have had four attempts to break my bones in the last week 🙁

With a hand broken from coming off my cross bike I swoon in response to a firm handshake, not in a good way.

The early grippers are annoying too

This as well^^

I'd sooner have to suffer shaking hands with someone possessing all the grip of a three week old stick of celery than someone daring to do this;

[img] [/img]

Note the manpurse.

I don't really rate handshakes by firmness but I sometimes work with a guy who's handshake isn't just limp he's completely uninvolved in it. He just seem to give you his hand to look after for a few seconds while his attention seems to be elsewhere.

someone daring to do this

Careful now - an epic handshake like that was responsible for wiping out the dinosaurs.

Captain, that's not a man purse, it's a toilet bag. He's got his toothbrush and a bic razor in it.

That's a caravan club car park. They've just emptied the chemikazi

Not a fan of bone crusher handshakes but I find the limp lettuce approach odd?

He should have clung to me cdoc we were easily the most "common" people in the room, I mean a Geordie and a Scouse at a upper middle class oxfordshire country wedding it's a wonder the parents could stand the shame.

However a normal handshake when the other person thinks they need to stare you in the eye is also peculiar

There's a book about bicycle retailing (written in the US of course) which recommends that you should greet your customers with a handshake, looking into their eyes to emphasise trustworthiness - and grasp their elbow with your other hand to increase the effect (and presumably stop them escaping).

Limp handshake, meh. Firm handshake fine. Trying to crush my hand, I'll press the pressure point at the base of the thumb. People either snatch their hand back, or go bug-eyed, it's most amusing.

Hah. When I lived in London I bumped into a colleague in the street and went to shake hands, but hadn't noticed he was going for the fist bump. So I shook his fist. Which made me feel like the inbred Cumbrian that I am and his mates found it very amusing. Give me a limp handshake any day.

boy in my work is murder for it, it's horrible.

Far far worse than the over-muscular handshake is the Alpha male palm flat down handshake; as practiced by boorish domineering types like my boss. This is where the shaker offers his fat meaty paw with the palm down, forcing you to shake with your palm upwards, which is a position of supplication and subordination.

The upwards palm comes from the same type of subordinate body langauge as people who look around anxiously as they enter a room, who carry stuff in their arms and walk fast, all of which, I heard on the radio recently, judges are told not to do on entering court.

The way to deal with an Alpha male downwards palm shaker is, apparently, to place your hand over the top of his, which will leave him confused and embarrassed without understanding why. I haven't had the nerve to do it to my boss yet.

Never mind political correctness, you don't seriously judge people based on grip strength do you?

Yes, along with the 1RM Squat, Deadlift, Overhead Press and Bench Press numbers...

What?

Far far worse than the over-muscular handshake is the Alpha male palm flat down handshake

Turn their hand over, 99% of men that try to do this have the forearms of a 9 year old.

What a load of beta over thinkers there are in here 😉

Firm handshake (not bone breaking) or don't bother.

To deal with the dicks offer your other hand positively - that usually confuses them to then awkwardly shake your hand with their already outstretched hand.

To deal with the dicks offer your other hand positively - that usually confuses them

Unless they are Scout leaders.....

I love the fact that people on here hate over firm handshakes so much and think the person is a tool so much so that they respond in kind....er you are a tool too. Just smile and get on with your life.

Hand offered palm down? Weird, respond with a scissors motion, boom!

Never mind political correctness, you don't seriously judge people based on grip strength do you?

only average speed matters.

What has a limp handshake got to do with "grip strength"?? Nothing! Idiot.

Limp handshakes are dreadful. They remind me of Guardian readers and men who lurk on mumsnet.

It really doesn't matter.

(This may become my standard thread response on here...) 😉

Hand offered palm down? Weird, respond with a scissors motion, boom!

Surely the correct response is to take offered had and kiss the back of it, normally with a muttered "enchante madam"?

Limp handshakes creep me out as much as vice-grip stare-shakes. Try that shit with me and I may just confuse you with two successive sets of peekaboo, possibly with an ass-slap finish before running away.

What a load of beta over thinkers there are in here

[img] [/img]

...dead fish nein danke, I mean eurgh! And yet there's a cultural aspect - e.g. in Turkey one gets handed many dead fish. How these guys get jobs...

On the other hand (swidt) surfing brings me into the world of the gansta handshake. You may think you're joking about fist bumps and complex hippity hop variants but these do actually happen.

Furthermore, I am now able to cope with the guys who go in for the shake with the karate chop hand position, where you go in thumb uppermost as though about to start arm-wresting.

This can lead to the hipster back pat, of which no good will come. Try it with me and you risk a big sloppy kiss, and trust me, no one wants that. Especially at work.

OP at wedding.
[url= http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=HKLP ]HKLP[/url]

I purposefully go in weak & slightly palm up, this gives my opposer the idea that the have the power, but the reality of any sub/dom relationship is that it is the sub which holds the power as they allow the other to dominate.

What about handshaking sitting down. Is that rude? Meeting a few people in my new job, if they come up to my desk I don't get up. Should I? Seems a bit like making too much of it.

HKLP I just use a (big) spoon (the type you eat with) covers all occasions

OldmanMTB,
HoldsSpoonLikeShovel..?