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After weeks of pestering, tears and claims of friends saying she was uncool, we have succumbed and let our nearly 11 yr old daughter have a FB account - she goes to secondary school in September. Am I asking for trouble?
We are trying to police it, but she has already done a couple of things she was told not to, so we'll see how it goes, but it may well be withdrawn. There will be tears...
Just putting the kettle on.
Lol darcy, I expect there will be a tad of a debate to ensue.
Either that, or just a load of people spouting crap.
My 3 daughters have had acounts since they were born, they can have the passwords when they are 18.
We had to do the same with our 11 tear old. As much as I'm against it, pretty hard not to succumb when the kid is the only one in the class without a FB account (and yes, we verified that)! Similar story with a mobile phone.
We monitor what goes on, not had any issues.
Police it and it'll be fine. Some routers will limit access to certain sites and certain times if you want to control it even more. My 8 year old hasn't asked yet but did ask for a mobile, which was a firm no.
Either that, or just a load of people spouting crap.
What, on here? Are you sure? My god, when this this start happening? 😯
Facebook rules.
[url=
4. Registration and Account Security
5. You will not use Facebook if you are under 13.[/url]
No debate.
My two nephews pestered their mum into it long before the actual "allowed" age. They're right pains in the arse on it, but they do have some sexy friends.
but she has already done a couple of things she was told not to
Like what..?
@ RealMan - adding friends parents, even though she was told no adults. The ones added are harmless, but if we set a boundary then it should be adhered to. She's not doing herself any favours at the moment.
Section 4. Registration and Account Security5. You will not use Facebook if you are under 13.
No debate.
As far any any of my children are concerned, parents rules trump foreign company rules every time. And FB couldn't actually care less, they just set the age limit to pacify the the sheeple, and to avoid courting negative publicity.
Sounds like your daughter can't be trusted with even the simplest rules. . . . Wait until she's a teenager - you're gonna have some real fun then 😮
Just reminded me, my 8 year old loves Moshi monsters. When she joined she innocently accepted every friend invite, 100s of them. I explained to her about it could be 'nasty people' tricking her and she should get her friends IDs from when at school. I then had the task of deleting them I did maybe 30 or so but had jobs to do. The next morning she came to me and said "Look I've deleted them all" she had bless her.
Yeah, tell her to add me back on!
adding friends parents, even though she was told no adults. The ones added are harmless, but if we set a boundary then it should be adhered to. She's not doing herself any favours at the moment.
She might have just been using her common sense, no harm done. By all means, keep an eye on her, but trust her as well.
It's only facebook, no harm done..
edit - so long as you get the right privacy settings set up that is.
As far any any of my children are concerned, parents rules trump foreign company rules every time.
Coolio, as a responsible adult I can ignore the speed limit here in Spain.
Wasn't there a case a short while ago of the footballer who was charged with doing or trying to do naughty things with a couple of minors. I bet the parents of those girls knew best too.
Don't come looking for sympathy from me if it all goes the shape of a pear.
Blimey, if I'd let my daughter on FB on certain conditions then she broke the rules immediately, I'd be revoking that privilege!
My Daughter is 11 nearly 12 and she is not allowed, mainly because she would be on it all the time(she already is texting/phoning/emailing in her spare time), meaning I'd be fighting her for the 1 computer to lurk on here. Her main argument is; 'you can talk to all your stupid nerdy biking friends when you like. By the way you all look like total idiots and what do you talk about? How to shame yourselves even more than you do already?'. She has a point....
"Next time it could be a child's facebook page" - Don Simon.
'you can talk to all your stupid nerdy biking friends when you like. By the way you all look like total idiots and what do you talk about? How to shame yourselves even more than you do already?'. She has a point....
Is your Daughter called Al?
😆
But seriously, no?
Wasn't there a case a short while ago of the footballer who was charged with doing or trying to do naughty things with a couple of minors.
was it these 2?
[img] 
[/img]
but she has already done a couple of things she was told not to
So ban her for a week/month as you think appropriate and then give it another go as a final chance until she's 13.
If you have "succumbed" then you clearly aren't comfortable with it, but even though you could have just quoted the FB rule that says 13+ you still haven't managed to stand up to your 11 year old.
So what message does that send out to her about the effectiveness of pestering and tears (blackmail)?
You're not doing her or yourselves any favours.
And another thing...
About these kids who say your child is uncool at school - you've just enabled them to start calling her uncool at home too. Well done.
str - email me and i will let you know safety tools/settings etc we recommend to the kids @school
rightplacerighttime - MemberIf you have "succumbed" then you clearly aren't comfortable with it, but even though you could have just quoted the FB rule that says 13+ you still haven't managed to stand up to your 11 year old.
So what message does that send out to her about the effectiveness of pestering and tears (blackmail)?
You're not doing her or yourselves any favours.
Posted 16 minutes ago #Report-Post
rightplacerighttime - Member
And another thing...
About these kids who say your child is uncool at school - you've just enabled them to start calling her uncool at home too. Well done.
Yeah, I find it really hard to stand up to an 11 year old - she doesn't have the right to roam that a lot of her friends have and her coming in from play time is a lot earlier. Every single one of her friends is on FB, so there have to be some compromises occassionally.
Virtual bullying will be closely monitored.
Virtual bullying will be closely monotored.
Will you be able to recognise the signs?
*momentarily forgets where he is...*
Virtual bullying will be closely [b]monotored[/b].
uuunnnh!! You some kind of mong or something? Learn to spell before you come on here!
Nobody without children should consider themselves qualified to give advice here.
Nobody without children should consider themselves qualified to give advice here.
Why not?
Nobody without children should consider themselves qualified to give advice here.
OMG! Here it comes.
[img] 
[/img]
There are far worse things they could be not asking to do at that age...
At least you've kept her off here.
Why not?
Not a clue - i just thought that at some point in a thread about parenting someone was obliged to say that.
Bit like Mornington Crescent.
😆
Not a clue - i just thought that at some point in a thread about parenting someone was obliged to say that.
You can't stop the rain of fire now, it's too late.
Funny thing is, I don't necessarily think that letting an 11 year old have a bit of freedom is a bad thing - when I was that age (in fact much younger) I used to spend lots of time down the woods, off fishing with my mates etc etc.
BUT - I really hate the corrosive effect (on myself included) of WAY TOO MUCH screen time, especially for kids, whether that be TV, games or FB etc.
If you're genuinely interested, have a look at Remotely Controlled by Aric Sigmund
Has someone nicked my "anyone without kid" post 😡
The shit storms (teaching term) facebook causes at school is unreal. Kids making friends with strangers and meeting them. Kids being bullied by people they don't like at all but are friends with. Kids incriminating themselves on it. I hope to god that by the time I have kids faceache will have vanished.
When a teacher I ************* got kids suspended for a few days for posting pics of themselves smoking dope on a school trip I don't know what made me the most uncomfortable: young kids posting pictures of themselves smoking dope or a teacher going through students' names on Facebook.
My son knows that Facebook is not allowed but that porn or anything else he chooses to look at with .fr or .de suffixes using "navigation privée" and "SafeSearch désactivé" while I'm out is tolerated.
He can spectate but not participate for the moment and seems to accept that.
OP - where's your daughter using the computer? Does she have her own in her room, or is there a family computer in a 'common' area such as your living room where everyone is happy for others to be in sight of their online activity? This is a key distinction to make, and a key part of parental teaching of safe online behaviour.
A good point. We have two computers in the living room. "Do anything stupid on that one and your mother could lose her job, do anything stupid on that one and your dad could end up in prison".
My two nephews pestered their mum into it long before the actual "allowed" age. They're right pains in the arse on it, but they do have some sexy friends.
@Deadlydarcy - aren't the friends also children? 😯
Yes, sorry, it was my attempt at a bit of edgy humour...the moment has passed though 🙂 🙁
There's a social network site for kids. Don't know what it's called. Will probably be nowhere near cool enough if she's allowed on it tho.
If you let her push you into stuff like this at this age (I'm assuming she's pestered rather than you trying to be 'friend-dad') then she'll be a right pain in the arse 3 years down the line.
The young lads in this area seem ok, it's the teen girls who give it the big un shouting and swearing on their way home from school. I blame you. 
(I don't really)