[Closed] I've had a few press photos done...

Where'd you get them done, local high street family portrait photographer?

And are you constipated? Or worried about an impending court case?

Big noses run in our family...

Elfin, nope, nope and nope 😀

Mr. Nutt once rang my mobile when I was in bed with a friend to offer me some old studio photographic gear and got quite shirty when I displayed a lack of interest 🙂

Ok so, if you want my genuine honest onion...

They're technically ok, but utterly uninspiring, contrived, sterile and devoid of any true depth of character.

For your style of music and that, you need to consider how to communicate YOU to your potential audience.

As a 'press' image, the second one is not too bad I spose, but they're just like 'spotlight' portraits actors have done. Basically descriptive, nothing else. TBH they're too technically 'perfect' for your image, I think. And they'd be improved greatly by being in black and white.

To promote YOU as an enigmatic thing, you need something with more going on. something a bit more stylised.

Had on, and I'll have a root about for some examples.

Here's a couple of Syd Barrat:

[img] [/img]

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See what I mean?

absolutely, the above shots are just some studio mugs, there's more lined up, featuring my old morris minor at a cracking location, naked ladies a plenty!

hey, wanna come along?

and SFB, I still don't know why you thought I got shirty? nutter! 😀

I still don't know why you thought I got shirty?

ah, maybe you always sound like that ?

Here's some more:

[img] [/img]

[img] [/img]

[img] [/img]

hey, wanna come along?

What to do photos of you, or watch someone else take photos of you?

😕 Why are you offering this one as an "example" ?

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I'm equally confused with the rubber duck btw

Why are you offering this one as an "example" ?

[img] [/img] "Christ, I've lost my mobile again!"

Oh ello, STW's resident philistine has turned up to mock, scorn and belittle... 🙄

(Not you Barnes, him)

STW's resident philistine has turned up to mock, scorn and belittle

well, someone has to. It's the law.

and they don't come much more knee-jerk than our Ernie...

Are you mocking me ? I only asked because Einstein isn't noted for his musical talents or publicising them.

I only asked because Einstein isn't noted for his musical talents

is that what it's about ? I thought Alex was just being butch! Perhaps he needs a new girlfriend ?

Nor Hitchcock btw.

See, I would gladly take the time to educate the heathen peasant, but I fear it would be akin to putting pearls before swine. 🙁

He's from Croydon though, so I spose I can't expect owt else really.

Sigh.

actually, Aziz was being kind by posting shots of well ugly blerks to make Alex look better!

Here you are, maybe MrNutt can go for the Gandhi look

[img] [/img]

but I fear it would be akin to putting pearls before swine.

you, my son, are mixing your metatphors!

there you are girls, if you don't want [b]him[/b] blowing in your ear choose that nice young man at the top!

did Ghandi ever have sex ?

No, the whole point was to try to demonstrate how well portraiture can be done, in an attempt to be constructive.

But then, I spose it's asking too much to expect a Croydonite to possess even an ounce of artistic and aesthetic appreciation. Did you see him on my this weeks architecture thread? He posted a picture of a toilet.

I despair, I really do. 😥

He posted a picture of a toilet.

well, you must realise that only mausoleums don't have toilets, and only dead people live in those 🙁

or is it mausolea ?

I'm not at all sure.

Mausoleae?

the whole point was to try to demonstrate how well portraiture can be done, in an attempt to be constructive.

You think posting a photo of a fat ugly old man holding a plucked dead duck is constructive ?

you're missing the point that toilets are essential to good architecture!

You think posting a photo of a fat ugly old man holding a plucked dead duck is constructive ?

it was a murder mystery aptly caught in a single shot

BTW MrNutt, I like your first photo

you've pulled, well done! That was quick 🙂

Not quite SFB.......this was my original post but was reluctant to post it :

I like the first one. The second one is too close up for me - I don't like to stand that close to a man. And the third one just looks straightforward gay - nothing wrong with that of course, depending on your target, it's just that I'm not gay. And yes you're a handsome bastard, and no not for me.

No, I do appreciate this, and indeed went looking for other examples of fine institutions, but I know it's Ernie's way of trying to derail proceedings, as the topic is generally beyond the limit of his aesthetic sensibilities. If only he would venture from the abyss of unenlightenment once in a while. 🙁

Nutt is probably, by now, sitting there weeping, [i]weeping[/i] at the utter futility of it all.

[img] [/img]

ooh, ooh, I know. A free copy of the new Good Mountain Biking Guide to the first person to find Mr.Nutt a date (or be his date). Does he like girls or boys ?

if that's his ex it's no wonder 🙁

And yes you're a handsome bastard, and no not for me.

but he doesn't look very happy does he? and now we know why...

whilst I appreciate the thought, romantic accompaniment is never anything I'm short of!

and as for my sexual preference, well thats another topic entirely!

And as for me posting a pic of a bog on your thread Elfie, you asked for public buildings who's architecture you appreciate. Well when I'm busting for a piss, I appreciate the sight of a bog - what's wrong with that ffs ?

No, I do appreciate this

but unless you post photographic evidence that the structures you present do in fact have working toilets how will we know they're not pointless edifices ?

romantic accompaniment is never anything I'm short of!

OK, I'll keep my flaming freebie then!
But wait, were that assertion true why would do be wasting sack-time posting on here ?? Fess up!

it isn't so much your posting of pictures of Public Conveniences, it was more your attempt at a statement against others' appreciation of something wonderful and joyous.

But I am able to find it in my heart to forgive you, as being from such golgotha as you are, you are sadly incapable of such feelings of Ecstatic Joy that cultural delights such as Architectural Appreciation can bring.

Because I am nice like that.

why would do be wasting sack-time posting on here?

good point, I'm off to bed, night folks!

[img] [/img]

your attempt at a statement against others' appreciation of something wonderful and joyous.

WTF you on about ?

By the way, I was down Brick Lane a couple of weeks ago and shocked to see great big signs everywhere with "Please use toilets provided" written in huge letters.........what's the matter with you people - do you piss in the road ? Dirty bastards 😐

what's the matter with you people

'You people'???

😯

Oh it's all coming out now, in't it, eh?

Marvellous, that is. Saying we're all subhuman scum now. Nice. Probbly racist too.

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another one

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at least he's got his hat on!

the first one looks like a press photo from 'big brother'...

simonfbarnes - Member
did Ghandi ever have sex ?

He was known to have a bit of a weakness for the ladies.

And now for something completely different....
[img] [/img]

I'm sorry but I don't think they are very good.... but there again you haven't made clear the context. What do you do and who is the target audience? 'Press' is a bit wide.

Do you sell bowler hats?

Spontaneous v Contrived?

I have no idea how you could even consider that comparison, J-me.

Nutt looks like something off CSI what would be guilty or horribly murderered.

...its a fair cop

ah context, for my press pack (I'm a singer songwriter www.oldghosts.co.uk)

following on from my 'big brother' press photo... this is what i mean..

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I thought the 2nd one was quite good.

I've got one of MrNutt with longer hair
[IMG] [/IMG]

Not sure if the fluffy bit out the back is extensions or not 🙂

He was known to have a bit of a weakness for the ladies.

but that might just be he liked to be spanked...

What do you do and who is the target audience?

fauxmosexual I imagine! Oh, but I think everyone who slags off Alex should post a compromising shot of themselves to be fair:
[img] [/img]
(admittedly, I didn't pay for that)

what are they for?
you look like a magician.
but yes, they're good
if you're a magician...

heh heh Dez you're a cruel cruel man! 😀

and I got them as a freebie so I'm pretty happy with them, Those aren't the best ones they're gonna let me have the good un's later

OK, fair enough. Fred's right - they are technically good but not creatively engaging or inspiring... ahem

Not quite Anton Corbijn.

But better than where you were.

Second one is the only one that works for me at all.

Sincerely - good luck

I don't have any pics of me online atm...

Ear, Dez; 'ave you got the Beautiful Thing™? Could bung that up. The ladies liked that one.

I thought they were cute Mr Nutt, even though I don't really know squat about photos. Better than that pic of Elfin with his ferret hanging out anyway 🙂

I thought they were cute Mr Nutt

Beautiful Thing?
What this one?
[IMG] [/IMG]

F-W-O-O-R-R!!

That is indeed quite beautiful, but I meant this year's Beautiful Thing™, you know, the one your wife (and many other ladies) liked.

Do you know, some **** nicked that hat off me? Think it might've bin in a pub somewhere. Utter, utter scum. I loved that hat. 😥

Better than that pic of Elfin with his ferret hanging out anyway

Don't be so silly you silly girl.

I don't really know squat about photos.

Obviously. 🙄

only the poshest tramps wear Rab

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[IMG] [/IMG]

Behold; the Beautiful Thing™! 🙂

It has made many a fair heart swoon, has that.

Do you not think the photo for the Self Abduction (Dark) Blues is where you should be at?

I think he looks grumpy 🙁

or a scary stalker person...

Personally I actually quite like the top one. It's interesting as I had someone volunteer to photograph me for her exhibition this week, and I was thinking her shots may provide me with some useful PR pics.

But yeah, the second and third don't quite work for me, but the top one is a good one for certain PR I reckon.

simonralli in my clutches:
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Luckily the photo of me on the cover of my book is from a far more flattering angle, although I am also wearing the same bandana in the pic 🙂