I'm not okay

Sounds like an incredibly positive week to me. 

I'm always getting depressed and fed up with thoughts in my mind, the possible final option is always there ....lurking. 

However, its a constant thought and will probably never go away.

So, things I do is and have always been saviour.  Just riding my bike and it's not having to be going down hill dafty. Field archery has been great, not so much club politics. Not in a club anymore. Now that was depressing and that was 10 years ago and still haunts.

And....Art. Grab a pen/pencil and some paper and just let it out. Better than the phone and the constant depressing Bullshit that it keeps offering up.

I'm into creature design at the moment and it's really absorbing.

Get drawing it really helps.

Display or burn your work, up to you. And remember thier is no such thing as a bad drawing.

Good luck dude, we are all in the the same boat... or very near it.

Circumstances caN change so quick, hopefully for the better.

 

 

 

 

Posted by: stcolin

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Can't think of anything worse. I am very weak, which is another issue - constant pulling of muscles, pretty much on a weekly basis.

I've started swinging a couple of kettlebells around this year. Following some of the basic/simpler compound movements shown on youtube. If you've got an outside space it's quite nice to do in the sunshine, or even under the stars. Not heavy weights but out there for 45-60 minutes, taking it steady. I also have a few niggling joint/spine/muscular issues, so the thought of going to an actual gym, or lifting actual weights is not on the cards. At all. Ever.

I even spotted a guy in one of our local parks with a couple of smaller ones. Stood watching the birds in one of the lakes/wetlands while swinging them round.

Just stood on the footpath near here.

 

Posted by: cyclistm

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Sounds like an incredibly positive week to me. 

Definitely wasn't, from my perspective.

Yesterday, and into today, I have felt very very low, to the point where I left work early yesterday to simply get away. I didn't want to come home, maybe just keep driving and see where I ended up, without and end goal.

 

Ah mate, that sounds rough. Don't beat yourself up about the gravel bike back pain... if you've been off the bike for a while that's bound to happen. Believe it or not an hour is quite a long time to be out and about for most people, ease yourself back into it and give yourself a break.

 

If you ever find yourself in Manchester and want to grab a coffee and a chat drop me a message and i'll mosey on in 

Thanks Scaled. I feel like I need time off work, it's overloading me at the moment, but I don't feel like it would go down well and I can't fully confide in my boss just yet. I had a bit of a safety net in my last job as one or two colleagues where very helpful towards me. It's been a long time since I've wanted to not work.

I've also binged on chocolate today making myself feel sick in the process.

Things aren't going well. I keep waking up feeling so down and out. I keep trying to just go about my day but underneath I'm hanging on by a thread. Maybe I need to stop for a while, step away from everything for a bit. 

Apologies for not following closely recently, but I'd speak to your GP first... and only after that your boss. But if you already know you need to step back to try and cope, get signed off pronto.

I don't want to let anyone down, I'm scared to go back to the GP and potentially get signed off.

Look after yourself. Talk to your GP.

[ I am also a typical man and avoid the GP though fear of outcomes ... but we all need to get over that somehow ]

You may not want to, but I think it's worth the chat. 

 

thirded or fourthed - you need to speak to someone, probably the GP. And it sounds like you may need some time off work just to get a clearer head etc. It's a tough conversation to have with work, no doubt. My 2p is that it sounds like it may not be quite the right job for you, given how it's adding to your difficulties; but you don't need to tell them that, at least not for now. You can tell them it's some challenges you're facing in your personal life, you just need time off to help get back on an even keel etc. 

But first stop, GP; it'll all be much easier once you have their opinion and recommendation

Hey pal, it sounds like things aren't gonna get any better unless you do something like see the GP.

Did you give that thing I sent you a go? It's designed for people in just your kind of situation and it's free so might be worth trying if you didn't. My colleague used it and said it was good.

Drop me a line if you want any more info, and wish you the best

Posted by: stcolin

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I don't want to let anyone down, I'm scared to go back to the GP and potentially get signed off.

 

Di9nnae be daft laddie!  If you are sick go off sick.  What would you do with a broken leg?  Haul yourself into work?