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What about children?
Last nights camp there seemed to be a gazzillion under tens on site hopped up on sugar having water fights with ballons and supersoakers and screeching until almost eleven pm.
My tent got one frisbee, two blasts from supersoakers and one kid tripped over a guyrope.
Do I have to learn to behave around children? Or can I administer swift justice?
Which is better? A boot up the arse or a flick to the nose?
When did I become Victor Meldrew?
Probably better threatening with an air pistol.
In all fairness actually they apologised each time. No damage was done and the kids were having a great time.
Just my misfortune to be given a pitch next to the kids playground and on the way to the water tap
Perhaps I should have had a load of cans of redbull to hand out😎🤣
Super soaker filled with redbull then.
Sounds like the kids were loving it.
You've always been Victor meldrew.
You need to make sure you tell them/pre warn them about what you are doing so they are not surprised by it. They will then act perfectly.
Think you need to add a big Nerf gun to the trailer tj 😂
Just kids having a great time. The parents are probably loving seeing the kids running about playing and not being glued to technology.
Personally I think these campsites should have something like a 10pm "settling curfew" for kids, to create some peace for younger sleeping kids and grumpy gits.
Last nights camp there seemed to be a gazzillion under tens on site hopped up on sugar having water fights with ballons and supersoakers and screeching until almost eleven pm.
I feel I rock a bit of inner Victor too - and I'm a bloody teacher!
Campsites are curious beasts - they are many different things to different people. But the ability for kids to run wild outdoors (like wot we did by default back in the black and white days) without the modern day neurotic parent losing their shit is the exact ingredient guaranteed to trash the blissful peace someone like me goes camping for. Both are great and desirable things but they don't mix. Sands campsite near Gairloch is I think the only site I've stayed at when kids and victors seem to be able to coexist and love it equally.
I appreciate it's tricky when on the road and you just need a night at a place with a shower in the right sort of location as choice is limited, but reading the mood and purpose of the site is key to a perfect Victor stay. I look at it firstly like I would as a parent or child - if it might appeal - I'm out of there! Camping and Caravan Club certified sites for the win - though if your need for a site is a shower and toilet (i.e. you are using a campsite when bike touring for the odd night between wild camps), that does narrow the field even further.
Just kids having a great time. The parents are probably loving seeing the kids running about playing and not being glued to technology.
If it's anything like our class camps the parents will have been drinking since midday.
The C&C Certified sites can be excellent and are my go to option.
Couldn’t imagine much worse 😂. “Family” campsites are brilliant though - somewhere for the kids to run around & get exercise & fresh air, whilst keeping them away from the nice, quiet campsites I like to go to! Much the same as Wetherspoons (keeps the plebs out of the nice pubs 😀)
Last time I was camping there were loads of kids with Supersoakers. They challenged me to a water fight.
I soon won, with my trusty kettle.
Have you thought about getting a big ugly dog which can scare them away?
You want one of these
https://www.smythstoys.com/uk/en-gb/toys/construction-and-cars/x-shot/x-shot-excel-crusher-by-zuru/p/187063
Maybe with a ground mount. Reenact the scene from predator
The parents were drinking round the firepit. Some of them looked second hand this morning 🤣
Damn it - dissonance beat me 😂
Maybe the campsite owners on here.....;)
Make like the parents and drink more? The problem doesn't go away you just don't care!
Offer them sartorial advice?
It wouldn’t have happened if you’d been wearing a helmet
Just my misfortune to be given a pitch next to the kids playground
That'll stand up in court I'm sure...
Nerf up grandpa!
I think there may be one of these in my future
https://www.militaryimages.net/attachments/m72-png.221408 /" alt="" />
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Some of them looked second hand this morning
You weren't tempted to hold a Sunday service and belt out some hymns at the top of your voice for them?
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What sort of photos have you been taking you weirdo? 😉
Let them have their fun.
By the time they reach your age, our generation will have eliminated democracy, trashed the environment and left nothing but a wasteland for them to live in. Only their fond memories of childhood exploits will be left to sustain them as they watch the dregs of civilization slowly give way to chaos, death and decay.
Reenact the scene from predator
I'm not sure lying on the ground by the kids' playground shouting 'GET TO THE CHOPPER!' is going to have the desired results.
😎🙄🤣
Top tip, the smallest little nerf pistols are the deadliest. Don't have the firing rate, but accuracy and power are excellent.
Get a dog, keep it off lead and just allow it to run riot.
Perhaps I should have had a load of cans of redbull to hand out
Just lace them with tramadol. Then problem solved...
Have you been to a campsite in the last 10 years?
It's a mostly family activity where people who don't have lots of room at home can give their kids some fresh air and outdoor adventure.
Which is why we love MTBing.
• Give the kids a break
• pick midweek
• pick a different pitch (don't campsites have different fields for different vibes)
• go to a caravan and camping site where they are likely a closer demographic
• chill out, grow a heart and some empathy - weren't you 8 once and pissing adults off?
What is required is an electric water gun that fires ‘bullets’ for greater accuracy:
Check out the Spyratwo in this roundup - expensive, but the fun you could have sniping the little gits!
https://hiconsumption.com/best-water-guns/
FTFYIt’s a mostly family activity where peoplewho don’t have lots of room at home can give their kids some fresh air and outdoor adventuresit round a campfire getting pissed whilst avoiding parenting their children
This all sounds very Nuts in May

So some kids apologised for very minor misdemeanours? Straight to the Tower...
Some of them looked second hand this morning
Time to break out the guitar and lighten the atmos with a bit of folk.
chill out, grow a heart and some empathy – weren’t you 8 once and pissing adults off?
Nope. Born a middleaged grumpy git😎🤣