I need to share a s...
 

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[Closed] I need to share a simile that made me howl

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It was in a piece describing the average person in a certain Yorkshire craphole of a town.

"Teeth like a burnt out fusebox"

Now that IS funny


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 2:42 pm
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Name n shame?


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 3:08 pm
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From a Yorkshire lass, the term is usually used around here is

Gob like an old fire grate


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 4:02 pm
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Halifax or Huddersfield?


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 4:23 pm
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Could be either of those two to be fair. My money is on Faxi though.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 5:19 pm
 Pyro
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I always liked a mate's use of "face like a melted welly".


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 6:06 pm
 Gunz
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I've always liked 'teeth like a pan full of burnt chips' or 'thick as a whale omelette'.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 7:42 pm
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‘Teeth like sugar puffs’ is the one that always makes me chuckle.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 8:02 pm
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A mouth like a council graveyard is one I’ve heard.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 8:37 pm
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Scouse lad I was at uni with described a girl once as having ‘a face like a galvanised bucket.’


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 9:11 pm
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More teeth than a Ferrari gearbox.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 9:21 pm
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Legs like a billiard table.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 9:33 pm
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Dustbin teeth....... One per yard.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 10:28 pm
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Long black curly teeth, walks with a lisp.


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 10:43 pm
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Mike Harding - "Teeth like the holy commandments, ten of 'em, everyone broke".


 
Posted : 07/03/2020 11:07 pm
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Teeth like a row of condemned houses


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 7:54 am
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"Long black curly teeth, walks with a lisp"

That could be straight out of a John Cooper Clarke poem!


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 8:34 am
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Teeth like a burnt fence.


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 8:42 am
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Face like they've been dooking for chips


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 8:44 am
 lerk
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Face like a welders bench...

Looks like someone set her face on fire and put it out with a golf shoe...


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 8:59 am
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Teeth like a Zulu's necklace


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 10:10 am
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Not a tooth in iz/er yed


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 10:32 am
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I used to work with a guy named Donnie who had terrible teeth.
We called him Donnie Summer.

Summer white, summer brown, summer there, summer missing

He had a face like a bulldog licking piss from a nettle


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 10:34 am
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I remember some old Charlie Brooker ones;
Face like a rucksack full of dented bells and, describing Anne Widdecombe;
Face like a haunted cave.


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 12:45 pm
 DezB
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Joe Lycett has some lovely ones - woman’s face looked like someone’s punched a quiche.
(and she’s called Lorraine!)


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 4:45 pm
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More feet than teeth?


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 5:16 pm
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Deliverance teeth


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 6:32 pm
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What's up wi yer, yuv got a face like a dropped pie/smashed crab.


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 7:51 pm
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Fanny like a wizards sleeve. Conversely... fanny like a mouse’s ear.


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 8:19 pm
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She could eat an apple through a chain link fence


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 8:51 pm
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What has 97 legs and eight teeth? Weegie methadone queue.


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 10:25 pm
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More chins than a chinese phone book


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 10:44 pm
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Fanny like a Hippo’s yawn.

Ring-piece like a chewed orange.


 
Posted : 08/03/2020 10:56 pm

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