[Closed] How to get Gardening Leave? - stories and suggestions wanted

Tell them you are moving to their biggest rival. Though that ship may now have sailed

Phone in sick. What are they going to do? or this:

Make some important customer sensitive documents disappear. You need to look like the culprit but in no way can the disappearance be connected to you. The last bit is important.

I've had 7 weeks gardening leave, I was working with confidential documents and they asked me to go the same afternoon that I handed in my notice, escorted off the premises by security after a manager oversaw me putting my pens and lucky desk ornaments into a regulation cardboard box. The odd thing was I didn't give a toss about the nature of the documentation I had access to and was leaving to go on an extended Summer holiday rather than work for a competitor. So aside from the over officious approach that was taken it was an all round winner.

I got put on gardening leave last year after resigning. Nearly fainted with stress leading up to it, then a horrible last day, quite a brutal way to go. Was in a right state for days after.

However it was offset by the fact it was in the middle of a glorious heatwave. The icing on the cake was a phone call 1 week later from the HR girl, confessing that I was on 8 weeks notice not 4! After countless HR balls ups and stress, finally one that went in my favour.

It was just a crazy company policy at the time, although I didn't really expect it to apply to me. Purely company secrecy (paranoia) thanks to some security blunders and leaks earlier in the year.

As good as it was, the time flew by so fast...

Just start turning up very late and doing sod all and pulling sickies if burning bridges isn't an issue. They'll probably get the message!

ask for a special order of loads of recordable dvds (I don't think turning up with just a usb stick looks as good) and if meaningful, ask for admin rights to your pc. Then ask whereabouts on the filing system they keep ....

or eat loads of curries and flatulate your way out the door

As long as you never what to go back working there start telling your colleagues that they should be looking for new jobs.
Search jobs sites for them and email everyone in the office with your suggestions for them.
Stick suggestions up on the notice board.
Make sure that everyone knows why you are leaving. Stir the sh!t. Be messy. Break some lowly rules as to pi$$ off your bosses but not big enough to sack you.
As mentioned above, do sod all, turn up late and throw sickies.

Mate of mine got escorted off site 30 minutes after handing in his notice.
Clutching a carrier bag of personals and a cheque for 3 months wages. They'd even taken his car keys.

Unfortunately it was the 160 mile a day round trip that had eventually driven him to quit. Took him the rest of the day to walk, bus and train his way home.

He was expecting to work his notice.

[quote=ghostlymachine ]They'd even taken his car keys.

That doesn't sound entirely legal to me - I thought if you had a company car you are still entitled to it for your notice period even if they send you on gardening leave?

This was ~25 years ago, it probably was illegal even then, but it all happened in a bit of a rush and he was a) probably in shock and b) glad to be out of it anyway.

Least they still had a reasonable bus and train network 25 years ago........

That doesn't sound entirely legal to me - I thought if you had a company car you are still entitled to it for your notice period even if they send you on gardening leave?

Father in law turned up to his job one morning, to be walked out and hailed a taxi home with a box full of cd's from the car.

Mind, that incident did end with DelMonte forking out a fair bit at tribunal....

Can't really go into who but someone coming to my company is currently on 1 years gardening leave from their current employer!!

Put on spandex and high heels then practice your air guitar in the staff room.

Mind, that incident did end with DelMonte forking out a fair bit at tribunal....

your dad was the man from delmonte? 8)

I left to run my own business but said (quite honestly) that if it didn't work out obviously I'd move to one of the competition.

your dad was the man from delmonte?

he say....YES!

Can't really go into who but someone coming to my company is currently on 1 years gardening leave from their current employer!!

You know the rules here. I'll start:

Names & details please!

Become 'Jack's Smirking Revenge'.

NSFW sweary

I stood up in the middle of a mid-year review and said "I'll make it easy for all of us. I quit". The two throbbers in the room nodded at each other, I walked back to my desk, picked up my coat and bag and walked out. 8 weeks garden leave with a company car at my disposal 8)

tomhoward

Tell them you are moving to their biggest rival. Though that ship may now have sailed

Well this is it in a nutshell. If that doesn't quite cut it your next step might be to email all your clients telling them you're moving on to bigger and better things and that you hope to be working with them in the near future in your very special role etc etc maybe CC your boss in by mistake.

That doesn't sound entirely legal to me - I thought if you had a company car you are still entitled to it for your notice period even if they send you on gardening leave?

You'd be correct. Because it's part of your pay and you're paying tax on it!

I quit a previous job I hated and got a months garden leave. Got a phone call from my boss (a horrible man who wore Bart Simpson socks with his suit) asking me when he would get his Car and Fuel Card back. I calmly stated he'd get them back at the end of my garden leave.

I then took it upon myself to do several roadtrips on MFI's card visiting Wales, the Lakes and Scotland.

I really really hope he got a report back stating where I filled up and knowing the bloke and his penny pinching attitude he probably did.

I've got two colleagues who had 11 months and 10 months gardening leave each.

I'm reading this with interest!
😉