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From recent experience, the secret of becoming invisible to people in: the office, pub, shops, especially the opposite sex and the youth, is to......
- Go grey
- Have a few wrinkles
- Start receding
- Grow a (grey) beard
- Wear jeans, trainers and a t shirt
I reckon I could walk into a shop and pick something up, not pay for it and walk out, without anyone noticing.
A bit like.....
This one is easy
Wear a hi vis vest
Wear a hi vis vest
...on a bike.
High-vis +1
Working in TV I found you could get away with anything if you wore a high vis tabard and a photocopied BBC pass.
Go grey and start receding! I should be so lucky. Been bald since my late teens. I think you’re confusing invisible with irrelevant OP 😉
Even when younger - just stand by a bar while rather 'thirsty'. Works a treat.
[i]Working in TV I found you could get away with anything if you wore a high vis tabard and a photocopied BBC pass.[/i]
I did a 1 week school placement at BBC Caversham Park and was given a hi-vis vest and a clipboard. It both made me invisible and gave me superpowers. I was meant to help check guests badges and passes but didn't know who actually worked there so just walked up to everyone and asked for their pass, took it to the office, photocopied it and handed it back. At the end of the week I had pretty much all the staff badges photocopied in the box of papers I took home. I think it was still classified as a listening station at the time too so probably not a great bit of security.
Don’t worry your kids taste in music will improve as they get older.
As someone who has delivered stuff - plain polo shirt, cargo pants and a box/package and you'll not be questioned anywhere
Move to London.
Get yourself a Mankini...
I thought this thread was going to be about a certain type of young that rides down the street at night pulling wheelies while smoking and talking on the phone at the same time. Black balaclavas and hoodies a must.
Wear a hi vis vest
I’ve said this for ages, along with boots, a nondescript blue fleece and a folder or clipboard. I’d need something like that to cover up all my tattoos! Oh, and a black beanie to cover up my mainly stubble covered head!
Go out to breakfast at a local cafe with an attractive neighbour. I can guarantee that you’ll get none of the attention.
I thought this was a post about Diane Abbot, stand up 40 times and be ignored while she was been discussed 🙂
In a past life working globally, a well-presented man in a suit can go anywhere - no one ever questioned where I was going or why was I there.
I was a fairly early fatbike adopter, this thread brings to mind my early rides on it.
First time out was a shakedown run out of the village, alongside the road a bit, then the relatively busy river track.
I remember thinking that this must be what it's like to be a really good looking woman as everyone looked my way and did a double take.
I made the mistake of taking it to some organised ride thing with the kids with a couple of hundred folk and the amount of attention it attracted just became irritating.
So, wear high Vis, but not on a cartoonish bicycle!
Go grey
Have a few wrinkles
Start receding
Grow a (grey) beard
Wear jeans, trainers and a t shirt
The main fail there is the last point. If you're in (reasonable) shape, dress a bit better, and have a confident (without being overbearing) attitude, you'll still be checked out by women of around your age. You'll be invisible to the 18 year olds, but TBH unless you're a Prince Andrew weirdo that's not something to be too concerned about...
Easy, there's an amulet in the Pitt-Rivers that will make you invisible if you can get it out of the cabinet. If not, as above, grey hair etc.
Use whichever paint they use on the one-way and no entry roads signs on my street and the next street over.
I find I become magically visible as I seem to be the goto person for directions. In the mountains I can understand it but in overseas city's?
As BWD says above, try being a woman.
A woman over the age of 55ish is just not seen or heard. We are completely invisible. Once our looks have gone and the body is sagging we are non-existent beings. Talked over, not taken seriously when talking to 'some' builders or dealing with male dominated trades, ignored in queues at bars, in pubs etc. I could waffle on for hours.
A few years ago when office attire was a suit, shirt and tie and office hours were 9 to 5:30 a colleague used to keep a bunch of files in his car so when he was late (often) he would leave his jacket, stick a couple of files under his arm and wander in, as if he'd been there for hours.
Just because it always makes me smile:
[i]not taken seriously when talking to ‘some’ builders or dealing with male dominated trades, ignored in queues at bars, in pubs etc. I could waffle on for hours.[/i]
Sorry dear, were you saying something?
Invisible? Can anyone even see the paintings in this photo because the people walking by certainly didn't.
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Or another opposite. Stand outside a retro cycling clothing retailers in Llangollen. Shop not open until Tomorrow. Owner spots a middle aged cyclist gawping at gear, comes out and asks you to come in, even though he's busy restocking.
PS I'm going back today to spend money 💰
As BWD says above, try being a woman.
... snip...
I could waffle on for hours.
Which might be the problem? 😉
For me it’s simply sit down at a table in a restaurant. Works every time. There can be swarms of waiters in the general vicinity, but I am stuck in some kind of vortex that makes me invisible to all of them. I’m used to it now and at the least make sure I get the drinks order in when being seated so I don’t die of thirst in the meantime
Wear a camo dry robe?
Go to one of those "local" cafes/bars etc - the sort of off the beaten track, avoid the tourist hordes places that get recommended in tourist guides which ironically has everyone who's read the guide going to said "local" bar for that authentic experience.
And then you sit there watching all the actual locals who prop the place up daily being served and the conversation going on between them and the staff while being near invisible to them and waiting for service that may never happen. x2 if there's a language barrier.
Go to one of those “local” cafes/bars etc – the sort of off the beaten track, avoid the tourist hordes places that get recommended in tourist guides which ironically has everyone who’s read the guide going to said “local” bar for that authentic experience.
And then you sit there watching all the actual locals who prop the place up daily being served and the conversation going on between them and the staff while being near invisible to them and waiting for service that may never happen. x2 if there’s a language barrier.
I can recommend North Wales for this experience - particularly nice touch is when they switch to speaking Welsh once they realise you're English.
I've heard this said so many times over the years about Wales and Scotland. I visit both multiple times a year and have never once experienced anything like this, I've always found the Welsh and Scottish to be very friendly and welcoming.
Maybe I've just been lucky although I sometimes wonder if it's because I sound very northern rather than a posh southerner.
I have the most RP accent possible in the world. How I never became a BBC newsreader in the 70s escapes me.
I've lived in Wales all of my adult life. The bollocks spouted about locals switching to Welsh (?to exclude the visitors?) is something that in over 40 years of visiting local pubs I have never experienced.
I bet it hasn't ever happened to you either.
I can recommend North Wales for this experience – particularly nice touch is when they switch to speaking Welsh once they realise you’re English.
Yeah, speaking their own language. The absolute cheek.
friends of mine wandered straight into a festival by donning some high vis vests and walking past the security in their high vis at the trade entrance. Just merged right in unseen.