House clearance.

Not all house clearance companies are the same. When we cleared a relatives house we found a company that sorts the items and gives what the can to local charities, skips what they can't. We still had to pay, but at least there was some positivity in finding out that they'd been able to help people who were being housed but had nothing to sleep on, etc

Can you use British Heart Foundation or similar to come in and take what they can to sell on and help someone out?

We did that with the FILs place.

Then there were 2 skips full of stuff as a lot of stuff was old. tired ina poor state of repair.

My wife walked away with a box full of photos and some random stuff that had happy memories as a child, but it was very sad to see someones life reduced a small box (which ultimately will be binned at some point in the future as it will have no meaning to our son). Its made me worry less and having items etc and more about getting out and doing things that create memories with my wife and son as all those items arent going to mean anything once I have gone.

Wherabouts (roughly) in the country is the property?

I know a person who has helped with this sort of thing in the past...

A grisly task that awaits me at some point...the next door neighbour's children just hired a house clearing company who sorted and threw the rest in a skip. They seemed to suspend sentimentality.

I've just done sort of similar with my folks, although after a downsize rather than a bereavement.

First off - Tip run. Just be brutal and go through stuff with a "is this even worth taking to a charity shop" head on. If it's not, take it to the tip.

Next stage, half-decent bric-a-brac, ornaments, pictures type stuff, taken in a big old run to a charity place, boxes and boxes of stuff

There is no money, like no money, in large dark wood furniture. Even charity places often won't take it as, frankly, no-one wants it any more. If they won't, you may be able to give it away for nothing on Facebook.

Similarly, thrift sites are also good for the "I've moved in a need a kettle" type stuff, and for getting rid of half decent furniture, microwaves, toasters etc

For stuff that might have some value, like guitars, stick them on eBay/Facebook. You might not get what you what you think they're 'worth', but you'll get something and that's better than nothing.

We found that charities like BHF who offer house clearances have a very long list of stuff they won't take, and end up not being terribly useful

Or, Google house clearance firms and let them worry about it all...

I went through this a while back, it's hard. I am fortunate enough to have 1) a big shed and 2), siblings. We sort of knew what was for each of us, mum had made that clear. Other stuff we chose. The remainder was skipped (surprisingly not too emotionally difficult) if it was tatty or taken to the local charity centre that helps people starting out. Smaller electrical items went to the tip too if charity didn't want them. Nowadays disposal of weee is so much easiler. Ornaments books and nick nacks went to Barnardo's in a big box. If it has a value to them I'm happy. I'm also happily, blisfully ignorant of what they have skipped. They know better than me what to do with it.

Stuff of value- records, instruments, pictures etc came home with me (or siblings). Some pics are on the wall, some glassware is used daily as is the cookware (it's a bit rather nice!) Other stuff remains in the shed. I look at it periodically and realise that i don't wan't/ need/ feel a bond to it at all. When this happens I offer it to siblings in case they want it (they never do) and then it get boxed up again and off to Banardo's we go. Records go to local record shop, if I get a few quid that's great.

Time, in my case almost 20 years plays a huge role. I have a favorite whisky glass I remember mum buying for my stepfather one wedding anniversary that reminds me fondly of them both. Initially other items made me feel like this, now much less so.

As for FB marketplace- I've sold a few things without much bother. It's also a good way to get rid of stuff someone might want but I'm not sure how to move on. Often I post it up for free, leave it outside the house and the magic FB pixies take it away.

Hope this has helped.

next door neighbour’s children just hired a house clearing company who sorted and threw the rest in a skip.

We did that when my mother went into care and we had to sell the house. My brothers and I took anything we wanted (early 1960s Guinness salt and pepper pots set for me) and got someone to skip everything else. Clearing a family house can be quite hard work, both physically and emotionally and the reality was we didn’t want most of the stuff my parents had accumulated over the years. Five hundred quid well spent

An alternative to FB is Freegle – it might be a bit time-consuming to get it all listed so perhaps you could list the main items and have an open day for people to come and get what they want on a first-come-first-served basis.

Dusty in here, thanks all. I should have said, anything of sentimental value I've already removed; that didn't account to much, mum's wedding ring and a box of photos mostly. It was my childhood home but I haven't lived there in decades.

Can you use British Heart Foundation or similar to come in and take what they can to sell on and help someone out?

Yeah, BHF charge £400.  Which is approximately £400 more than I was planning on spending.

There is no money, like no money, in large dark wood furniture.

Oh.  That's depressing.  I mean, not because of monetary value - I have half a memory that it was horrendously expensive - but just the sheer waste.

Wherabouts (roughly) in the country is the property?

East Lancashire.

We did it a couple of years ago. MIL passed and it was nearly 12 moths before the house was finally sold. Took months to slowly clear the house, taking stuff to the tip. We've ended up with a couple of bits of furniture that are of no use, and just taking up space in the conservatory, but that's for my wife to get rid. Most ended up tipped as charities won't take anything without the fire sticker still being attached. A riser chair went to another elderly relative, but that's it.

I've ended up with a pile of patio slabs I didn't want, that MrsF brought back (they were surplus at MIL's) so they've been stacked at the side of my garage for 12 months now. I've refused to lay them as I'd need to dig up a large part of the lawn I don't want to, and would involve digging down 6 plus inches. I've said no.

Yeah, BHF charge £400.  Which is approximately £400 more than I was planning on spending.

But your well being is worth more than £400 and if for whatever reason you don't want to do it's worth paying someone to take the problem away once and for all.

They charge you 400quid to clear the house.

I would snap their arm off. No one is going to come in for free.

They are charging 400quid to handle the waste. They make money on the stuff they can sell. The don't want to be in the negative

Honestly just spend it. Look howmuc a skip or three costs...

We shifted a load of stuff just by putting it kerbside with a 'Free, please take' sign!

And £400 is a bargain for someone to come and clear a house. Took us weeks just to do my FIL's garage!!

your well being is worth more than £400

That's a very valid point, actually.

At our local recycling centre they have a container for serviceable items of furniture which will go to local people who need stuff.

I dont know if this is feasible or available where you live but it might be possible.

when we cleared my Nanas place a few years back it upset my mother a great deal that the knackered Billy bookcase she had in the hallway could have been sold a hundred times over but the immaculate hardwood display cabinet with leaded glass panels wasnt wanted by anyone. fashion tho innit. anyone who wants old person furniture already has it!

on the other hand some older stuff is in fashion - 70's ladderax bookshelves are incredibly sought after these days. Ercol will always find a buyer too - so if any of your furniture has a label on it, it may be worth checking eBay.

ultimately don't give yourself a hard time - memories don't have to mean stuff and you can only do so much to minimise landfill

It must be an awful situation to be in and I'm kinda glad my house isn't that big and I've stopped collecting stuff that isn't consumable!

Perhaps just think of the £400 as a donation to a good cause and the clear out of the house is an added benefit.

Car boot sale, then donate the proceeds to a charity,parent would have approved of.

I'm looking at this myself at the moment. There's a car (see Moke thread), and the rest of the garage (tools, boat, bikes), after that I won't be able to bung BHS £400.00 fast enough. The only things of any sentimental value to me are photos.

Weirdly, I had less of an issue clearing my own house when I moved.  I got A Man in to break down and remove whatever was left, some of it smarted but... I dunno, it was mine?  I know it's daft, but it feels like I don't have the authority to be doing this (I do, I have a bit of paper that says so).

It's all deeply weird and unsettling.  I don't recommend it.

Me and my sister will be facing this in the not too distant future with our Mum's house.

I'm here at the moment, I've done a few bits and pieces, tidying up, cleaning out the (frankly horrific) fridge, done some work in the garden but the whole place is in a sort of "managed decline" now, she's way too frail to do anything productive with it and too poor to afford the very large sums of money it'd take to do it up properly.

Dreading the house clearance prospect but - as others have said - I think a few hundred ££ on a professional firm coming in with a couple of big skips will be worth every penny.

I’m looking at this myself at the moment. There’s a car (see Moke thread), and the rest of the garage (tools, boat, bikes), after that I won’t be able to bung BHS £400.00 fast enough. The only things of any sentimental value to me are photos.

I actually  used to do house clearances. You would be amazed by:

A. How many houses hd been absolutely sacked for cash by families. Like sofas slashed, suit lining jackets linings, all the drawers pulled contents dumped. Like completely turned over.

B. How much shit i sold that had been left, folk are clueless.

C. How many photos had been cast aside.

The houses of alcoholics were the worst, they were absolutely rotten, drug addicts were alot less manky but pretty grim.

But hell, if someone said “my son’s just got his first house and could really use a kettle” I’d feel happier about that.

There may be chartities local to you that make 'Starter Packs' for homeless people moving into housing. So if there is thats the sort of place that would take a lot of mundane stuff - kitchen ware, crockery,  and so on

There is no money, like no money, in large dark wood furniture.
Oh.  That’s depressing.  I mean, not because of monetary value – I have half a memory that it was horrendously expensive – but just the sheer waste.

There are certain things that once every house used to have, and now every house doesnt really have - piano, a bible, and a big wooden dresser/display case. Theres just more of them than there are homes for them to go to now.

I think in considering what things are worth or what services would cost - don't underestimate the time that could be consumed. You may have picked out all the sentimental stuff, but theres still lots of sentimentality involved in dealing with 'stuff' becuase the stuff is 'storied' I guess. It eats an amazing amount of time.

I had to clear out and redecorate my mum's house so it could be rented out when she went into care. She'd already take what she wanted, and myself and my brother had sone the same. There were one to two valualle enough things to take to an auction house - not that valuable but particular enough that a charity shop wouldn't know what to do with them.

Took ages! Every single bloody thing is interesting! Theres actually nothing wrong with that - useful process maybe, But you have to have the time to give it.

I know it’s daft, but it feels like I don’t have the authority to be doing this (I do, I have a bit of paper that says so).

It’s all deeply weird and unsettling.  I don’t recommend it.

its sorting someones life into your memories.

when we cleared my Nanas place a few years back it upset my mother a great deal that the knackered Billy bookcase she had in the hallway could have been sold a hundred times over but the immaculate hardwood display cabinet with leaded glass panels wasnt wanted by anyone. fashion tho innit. anyone who wants old person furniture already has it!

My grandparents had a similar load of old person furniture which they were fondly convinced was worth a fortune.

Literally couldn't give it away.

Mid century furniture is worth something if Scandi, 1950's Ercol, 196/'70's teak G plan stuff is worth selling.

We have a local thrift group and many things are snapped up if free, clean and of decent quality. We've had a complete garage clear out (it's taken many hours). Stuff went to charity shops, got sold or thrifted, we were trying to avoid landfill.

A friend has just used a house clearance company. The experience wasn't good. They had no sympathy, came in, stripped out everything. He said he didn't want his father's property to be emptied like this but had little choice. It's difficult.

We have been through this exact process and actually exchange contracts tomorrow. Thank goodness it's been a long 12 months.

There are definitely charities that will take some stuff for free EG https://emmaus.org.uk/

They just took what they wanted. The in-laws had some great but dark furniture. Some stuff went to a local auction but they and emmaus refused some great stuff, no demand.

So what was left and white goods and beds we free cycled.

The rest we took to the tip.

I cleared out the family home after my mum died about 18 months ago. Me and my BiL did it over maybe 20 days over a few weeks.  Possible because I had a panel van and the local council ( to my mum) have a very relaxed attitude to vans at the tip.  After the few bits me and my sister kept - I reckon about 70% to the tip, 25% to the local hospice shop and the rest to auction - lots of ceramics and some silver, got a few hundred quid mainly for the silver.  I only sold it because I promised my mum I would before she died.

It was hard work clearing the house - both physically - big 4 bed rammed with 50 years of accumulated clutter, furniture etc.  Also difficult emotionally as binning stuff she valued and impossible for me not to think about how she'd feel about me going through her stuff.

Not sure how I'd have felt about BHF or similar trawling through her stuff unfiltered. But £400 doesn't seem a lot for the effort and cost of disposal if the local tip won't take it

In the end it was cathartic doing it myself guess and me and BiL had the time spare

Hope it doesn't turn out too stressful for you

There are people who do this professionally, I'd advise you to take any heirlooms and keepsakes you fancy and then use them for the remainder.

If you have enough valuable stuff, it may be worth using an auction house. We made a fair profit on granny's old house contents that way, it didn't have obvious antiques (to our eyes) but some of the old items sold for far more than we'd imagined they would and it covered the cost of the process a couple of times over (eg I think we made a few thousand quid net).

If it's more along the lines of charity shop donations, then various charities will do it, and may give you a bit of money back depending how much they take for their shop.

If it's almost all junk, you can find someone to take it to the tip, they will still take usable stuff to charity shops as it's cheaper than paying for disposal. We are doing this with FiL's house right now. It's a big messy job and I don't begrudge them the amount they are charging us! The house is very damp and structurally unsound in places, it's not a pleasant place to be. We have already salvaged all the stuff we want (and more).

It's really not a very pleasant task and you shouldn't feel obligated to take on too much of it yourself.

We went through this about 3 years ago when Mum first went into care. Lost count of the times we (My sister who lives nearby and me and occasionally our brother who lives in London) went to the house with great intentions then spent hours sitting on the floor looking through boxes of photographs. I dont envy you, its a heartbreaking task. I hope you have someone who can share the load.

I'm dreading this. I feel for you.

I'm sitting in my dad's place right now and there's so much very old good quality stuff that will be hard to get rid off emotionally. But I'll also have to do it from the other side of the world or at short notice. Hopefully not for a long while!

Lost count of the times we (My sister who lives nearby and me and occasionally our brother who lives in London) went to the house with great intentions then spent hours sitting on the floor looking through boxes of photographs.

What baffled me - I'd go down every 2-3 weeks, pack stuff, dispose of stuff, donate stuff (whilst doing all the pondering over interesting discoveries and sentimental discoveries (a message my dad had left behind the wallpaper "There will be no message here today') and leave thinking - thats it, I've broken the back of it, the house is nearly empty. Come back a few weeks later and there'd seem to just as much to do, just now with nowhere to sleep, sit, cook or eat.

Sad but most people have pretty much nett zero value once moving stuff & auction fees are taken off ? Here we have local homeless charities, work aid that sends stuff to developing countries and the bigger waste & recycling centres have reuse shops to sell anything that gets dumped that has any value.

WWSTW do?

Pay the £400 + claim it back from the Estate.

Take the vinyl to a dealer- might be valuable.
As has been said mid century furniture (the stuff Habitat and IKEA copy) is collectible.
Putting outside is a good idea.
Common sense check items then pay to have the rest cleared.
I have said stuff a lot. Apologies.
Edit- I’ve edited it.

@jimdubleyou

+1 (but I'm not the sentimental type)

If there’s one sole beneficiary and no IHT to pay there’s no benefit in claiming costs off the estate.

Putting outside is a good idea.

See if there's a local community group on FB, join that and then once you've started clearing stuff, pop a post up on there saying "freebie furniture etc outside [address]"

It'll be taken in seconds. A neighbour did that, put a trestle table outside the property and as fast as she loaded stuff onto it (basics like tupperware, small kitchen items, old TV etc) it was being taken off and whisked away.

If there’s one sole beneficiary and no IHT to pay there’s no benefit in claiming costs off the estate.

Yeah, I am the estate, that's it.  I'd be taking money from me to give to me.  Small mercies in some way, it's as uncomplicated as it could possibly be.  The house sold to a cash buyer in like a fortnight. I was quoted 4-6 months for probate, once I'd got my thumb out of my arse it cleared in a week or two.

But it's a double-edged sword, it's also solely my problem and I've never had to do anything like this before.

Minor update, a cousin has expressed interest in some of the nick-nacks.  That makes me happy, I'd rather it went to extended family where possible.

Thanks for the kind words all, it's sincerely appreciated.

See if there’s a local community group on FB, join that

There is, I got evicted from it for not being racist enough.

Always worth sticking the furniture up here or even seeing if a men's shed or woodworker would take it to rework it into something else.

Always worth sticking the furniture up here

Sold as seen, have a nosey.

https://youriguide.com/168_willows_lane_accrington_lan_gb

Ooh, I'll have the Puzzler Collection, the Oral B ROTJ poster and the dead animal lying at the front door if it's an otter.

Nothing else useful to add, if it's actual wood then someone might take it for projects but I can see how you would struggle. If it helps I had exactly the same feelings when we cleared my grans place out, I hate seeing things go to waste. Not looking forward to the next time as it will be one of our remaining parents.

FWIW I used AgeUK to clear my parents' house. They deducted what they thought the value of the contents was from their fee for the clearance. I felt that any profit they made was supporting a good cause.

If it helps I had exactly the same feelings when we cleared my grans place out,

Something I'm kicking myself about...... My gran had a sort of Ercol style cabinet in her flat (she lived in a short of sheltered housing complex). I guess in that time it was typical sort of old folk furniture, mid century furniture prob seemed a bit passe in the 80s -  but for some reason even as a kid I found it quite distinctive. Particular to her.

What I didn't realise until years after she's died - she'd made it.

She was the daughter of an alcoholic and had to work as a child to support her family and had a very strong sense of self reliance - she encouraged all her daughters to train and be able to work even though their schooling at the time was grooming girls for marriage and motherhood, and she herself just 'did stuff' so even with 7 kids, including a couple who were quite sickly, she did things like learn woodwork and  she'd built all her own furniture.

Do you know what - seeing that walkout 360......

Working in film and tv there would ne people who'd see that as a gold mine - that kitchen would be a Set Dec;s dream if there happened to be the right era of drama filming. We transplanted a similar vintage kitchen out of a house that was being cleared recently. Stuff like the 'beauty board' on the walls - you just can't buy that anymore.

It would be a longshot but things like that were found through fastidious Facebook Market Place searching  - a well key worded listing an a link to the walkabout might yield someone who'd pay to  take it away. Then you get to see it in the next Happy Valley.

I've got an award on my mantle piece for a set that had a light-through ceiling like the one in the bathroom

Stick a piece of paper at the top of the stairs saying "DONT GO DOWN EMPTY HANDED"

Pictures (frames could go to a good charity shop) as they seem in good condition.

Edit:  Cougar - You can sell that kitchen, it's in great condition and the retro design is desirable.

Good luck x

Firstly condolences - I think many of us will be going through something like this in the next few years.

I have been helping my mum and dad to try and reduce the amount of stuff they have that they never use - they moved from a 6 bed bungalow 25 ish years ago to a 1 bed, and although they had to get rid of a lot of furniture, there is still too much for the house, and the nick knacks cover every  surface (and cupboard, and top of cupboards, and boxed up in the garage and loft).

What I would say is that this seems a really nice house, well looked after and without too much stuff to get rid of. Perhaps ask some close friends to come and help haul bits off to charity shops etc?

Re the guitars - not sure what they are, but post a pic up in the guitars thread here and see if people can let you know what they might be worth. If they are not worth a lot (and most aren't) then try and find a young kid who might be overjoyed at getting their first guitar. If they are worth something, then people here can suggest where to sell them ( https://www.thefretboard.co.uk/ is sorta like STW for guitarists for example).

the Oral B ROTJ poster

My childhood bedroom, that.  The poster is probably as old as the film.

Re the guitars – not sure what they are, but post a pic up in the guitars thread here and see if people can let you know what they might be worth.

Oh, I didn't know there was a guitar thread.  Cheers.

^^^ What Bunnyhop said about the kitchen.

That could fetch a good price if you can find the right outlet.

We had a charity come to my dad's house. They took a few items but said old brown furniture doesn't sell.

After the family had taken some sentimental items and books etc taken to charity shops the rest was dumped. Too much going on dealing with bereavement and the estate to explore every selling option.

I got the clock that had been in the family since the 18th century. After a full service from one of the last local clock guys it sits chiming away every hour.

I find it amazing this clock has been kicking around for 250 years and never moved more than 12 miles from where it was built?

https://player.vimeo.com/video/376007694?h=68b1d8e101

That could fetch a good price if you can find the right outlet.

That's a big "if," I wouldn't know where to start.

Mid-century teak furniture is expensive to buy 2nd hand but the dealers etc will usually only buy it from you at a very low price and may  even upcycle/paint it anyway

My friend looked into the same thing and was told a lot of it just isn't worth the effort in trying to sell it. His folks had a 50s burred walnut bedroom set in immaculate condition and he couldn't get anyone to look at it - there was something very similar on eBay for ~£900.   It's a total lottery

@Cougar - I'd just pay the £400 and get someone to take the problem away. You'll never know if the "stuff" is worth a lot but why worry about it. It's a lot of hassle to do it yourself and you sound like you just need some peace in your life, not more stress.

The grief it will cause is unlikely to be matched by the money received is my opinion. I'm with ElShalimo on this (and it's what we did with my parents house)

Regarding selling stuff and the comments above...

Knocking around in the loft at my Mum's house was a load of old Corgi toy cars; they'd belonged to my Dad, he'd given them to me but they'd ended up in the loft after I moved out (parents long since divorced).

Dug them out ages ago when I was helping with some tidying, popped a few of them on eBay and they got "reasonable" money but even then, it was more hassle than it was worth to clean them, research what they actually were, list them, answer all the inevitable questions from bidders, box them and post them.

The idea of doing that with 40 years worth of accumulated tat fills me with horror! The potentially small cash gains are just not worth the time spent sorting and listing everything then dealing with the inevitable tyre-kickers. Best hope is to find someone who'll give you £200 for a pile of stuff and if they happen to upcycle some of it, good on them!

If you decide to take the furniture to the tip yourself, read up about POPs first and don't cut it up to get it to fit in the car.

With my parents house we found a refugee family who were delighted to take the white goods, dining suite etc.

Might be worth having a look at https://droppoint.org/ , they connect you to various verified charities.

Having had to clear my mums house, I would in future happily pay £400 to never go through that hell again. It wasn't really the clearing, it was dealing with my sister who wanted to keep everything!

Having done it recently, I wish I'd have just paid someone to do it sooner... the niggling stress of it all and the thought of having to list stuff for sale, especially big stuff like dining room table, 3 peice suite, several large cabinates, etc, etc, ..

It would have saved me a lot of anxiety if I'd had just done that in the first place 6 months ago.

Oh and a starilift aswell.. which unless pretty new and hig end, are only worth scrap metal value. One company wanted to charge me £200 just to get rid of that  one thing. It needed to be gone along with a lot of other big stuff as the house sale was nearing completion...

Sorry I’ve not read the whole thread

I was envolved with clearing my dads sister’s house. The advice we received from her neighbours son, who had just cleared her house, was don’t bother selling the good stuff separately. Unless you’re happy to do everything yourself

Basically over months him and his bother sold loads of good stuff. But when they called the clearance company they said you’ll have to cover all our costs because there’s nothing left we can sell. So in the end they didn’t make anything selling the stuff, as it just increased the clearance costs

We used the same company but didn’t sell anything ourselves. They just charged us the the costs they incurred at the tip. 3 guys labour over 2 days was covered by what they sold

@Cougar it sounds like a festering source of stress and guilt for you, and I'm willing to bet there will be no great feeling of satisfaction (or financial gain) in knuckling down and dealing with it yourself. I think we sometimes kid ourselves that it is our personal responsibility to 'do things properly' in this kind of situation to achieve 'closure'. Maybe for some people, but not for others.

400 quid for clearance sounds like money well spent to me - take out a small amount of token items and sell them if you feel like it, but above all, invest your energy in looking after yourself. Preserve your memories of your childhood home by not making the final one you emptying it into a skip.

400 quid is a ****ing bargain and I’d snap their hands off.

FiL’s tip will be close to 10x that and I don’t begrudge them. It will be a hateful job.

Yes, in the midst of this too with our parent's property. One issue is that there are three of us siblings, one of whom is deeply attached to everything of our parents, from Dad's 20-year-old Dunlop tennis shoes to the most hideous commemorative plates. Result being that we have cupboards full of clothes etc. It's difficult but I might have to try again to move things on. We have a local charity that has collected some larger items (beds etc) for free. We gave a load of stuff (bicycles etc) to local Ukrainian refugees and a local sailing charity. But there's a lot more to go. Sigh.

One issue is that there are three of us siblings, one of whom is deeply attached to everything of our parents, from Dad’s 20-year-old Dunlop tennis shoes to the most hideous commemorative plates.

My Dad and aunt had this when they cleared out their father's house. My aunt - a lovely and thoroughly pragmatic woman - was very much "house clearance, skip, sell house".

My Dad was hoarding all manner of old tat, horrible furniture, old kitchen porcelain and so on cos he'd "grown up with it" or "it had memories".

Was a massive source of stress and argument between them, I'm not sure they ever really healed that rift!

I suppose in a scenario like that it's handy to have an offer accepted on the purchase of the house.. As the clock is ticking then so it has to be sorted one way or another... The other sibling or whoever then must take what they want and accept the rest is gone.

We had to do this last year (dad died, mum couldn't cope on her own at 90+, eventually has gone into a home.  Council want my mum's 0.5.of the house value so had to sell.  (Brother copped for doing most of the bureaucracy as he's 100 miles closer than me).

We basically went and sorted the photos and personal docs etc, I retrieved my old Marshall amp and guitar, brothers took some proper vintage fishing gear of my dad's, and other family members went though stuff to locate other pockets of stashed £££ cash (!!! Make sure you do that - older folks stick cash in odd places !!!).

Buyer was a builder who was going to renovate it (it needed gutting and totally redoing really).

We couldn't get anyone to sensibly take stuff even free.  Eventually the builder had a couple of skips in to clear out.  We'd have spent more in diesel travelling there and back than what we'd have got trying to sell stuff.

Best wishes getting through it. You have to be ruthless.

It’s a tough world. But it’s basically i can throw it away or i can die and then my kids can throw it away

In wish i was better at acting on this

Why is it difficult if siblings want to keep different amounts/items of stuff? The only minor disagreement I had with my sister was when we wanted the same things!