Happy in your own c...
 

  You don't need to be an 'investor' to invest in Singletrack: 6 days left: 95% of target - Find out more

[Closed] Happy in your own company?

43 Posts
37 Users
0 Reactions
220 Views
Posts: 0
Free Member
Topic starter
 

I'm 37, and I'm beginning to wonder if I'm getting a bit too happy in my own company. I'm currently splitting time between two cities, and I'm finding time in the second city slightly more appealing as it's more solitary. The pizza toppings thread, made me think one night last week I could have returned home and caught up with friends/ family etc, but chose to spend my evening walking an hour across town to pick up a pizza and stopped at a couple of lovely boozer's on route. Returned home listened to some music, had a night cap and an early night.

I do spend a good chunk of time with friends and family which I really enjoy. But don't have any wish for kid's or a long term partner. Work and the internet supplies me with enough female company to meet my needs, but as soon as a relationship becomes intrusive I knock it on the head. There are odd days/ nights when I find myself at a loose end, but generally square this off as a life style hazard and find something to do on my own and feel pretty content. I've been living like this through my 30's, and don't see it changing. So two questions;

- am I weird?
- how good are you in your own company?


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:05 pm
Posts: 4421
Free Member
 

People find being happy and content disturbing as they're not used to it.

The modern mantra of continuous growth is fundamentally flawed


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:06 pm
Posts: 28680
Full Member
 

I'm pretty good with it... Although i'd miss not having Mrs Weeksy. But a decent chunk of the time i'm alone, i'm happy with it.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:08 pm
Posts: 17273
Free Member
 

I don't know.

I've shared a bedroom my entire life.

As a result I treasure every rare moment I get to be by myself


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:08 pm
Posts: 20561
Free Member
 

I am not alone very often but I do like it. And tonight is one of those nights – my wife and girls are going for a meal with friends then on to see Little Mix so I am finishing work early, taking the dog for a long walk via a pub then home to cook myself some tea and listen to music at unreasonably loud levels.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:10 pm
Posts: 43345
Full Member
 

Balance.

Life needs a bit of sharing and a bit of solitude. Lots of my friends can't understand why I'd head off alone into the hills, especially overnight and longer trips.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:10 pm
Posts: 8527
Free Member
 

perchypanther - Member

I don't know.

I've shared a bedroom my entire life.

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:11 pm
 km79
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I am pretty much the same as OP. I don't find it weird but others seem to do. I enjoy my own company more than the company of others, although I do spend time with family and friends. No desire to be in any serious relationship or 'share' my life with a special someone either.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:13 pm
Posts: 17273
Free Member
 

🙂

Reminds me of the time I spent in jail with Lester Piggot.

I'm the only 15 stone man to ever ride a Derby winner.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:13 pm
Posts: 8527
Free Member
 

An old classic that joke Perchyboy!


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:15 pm
Posts: 17273
Free Member
 

Gotta keep the classics alive. 😉


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:16 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I am very happy in my own company. My wife finds it difficult to understand that I would much rather do an activity I like (e.g. ride a bike) on my own than either ride with other people or swap it for a more social drink down the pub with friends. The activity overrides company. Now that being said I have been married / in a relationship for most of the last 30 years and whilst toying with the idea of remaining single I was in a serious relationship and later married within 2 years. So a mix really.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:19 pm
Posts: 8527
Free Member
 

I must admit, the idea of growing old alone is not appealing at all.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:20 pm
 ton
Posts: 24124
Full Member
 

we are given reproductive organs for a reason. enough said.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:23 pm
Posts: 13192
Free Member
 

Love it. In short supply with young children so I love to get out in the wilds on my bike as much as possible.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:25 pm
Posts: 346
Free Member
 

Same, I enjoy having me time. But I wonder if that's because it's so rare and life is otherwise so manic and filled with the sounds of other people's voices, that the novelty would quickly wear off if it was the norm rather than the exception.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:26 pm
Posts: 20675
 

we are given reproductive organs for a reason. enough said.

To play with when we are by ourselves?


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:27 pm
 DezB
Posts: 54367
Free Member
 

[i]- am I weird?[/i]
Probably, but then aren't we all.

[i]- how good are you in your own company?[/i]
Lived with someone for nearly 25 years.. now live alone. Prefer the latter (and she was pretty easy to live with.) Never again. My kid is the only person I'd contemplate living with now.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:29 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

ton - Member
we are given reproductive organs for a reason. enough said.
so have 7.6 billion others, it's not particularly necessary for the species survival.

to the OP, do what makes you happy.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:29 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Sounds like me in my 30's. I'm now almost 46, married with 3 kids 6 and under 😀


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:38 pm
Posts: 17779
Full Member
 

I was quite happy without a partner until the right one turned up (without me making a huge effort or being "on the lookout" - it just happened). Happy now too. No kids though, that's never been on the agenda.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:38 pm
Posts: 2
Free Member
 

Love my own company and crave solitude, which is why I go to bed so late, it's the only alone time I get


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:39 pm
Posts: 13617
Full Member
 

Yep - more than happy.

The older I get, the more people frustrate me.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:46 pm
Posts: 91000
Free Member
 

Go away, all of you.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:50 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Mostly yeah, but sometimes he just won't shut the flip up.

The problem with it is that even if or when I want to, I Can't Escape Myself... 😉

(I'll leave the Youtube link to someone else).


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:52 pm
 ton
Posts: 24124
Full Member
 

so have 7.6 billion others, it's not particularly necessary for the species survival.

regardless of your thoughts. we were born to reproduce. FACT


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 12:55 pm
Posts: 827
Free Member
 

No soldier you were born to die !


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:00 pm
Posts: 5177
Full Member
 

I think quiet time away from a busy life (which might be walking the dog, watching TV or doing whatever activity floats your boat) is different to just preferring to be on your own

I'm not judging either way. Personally I'm in the former camp. I think I'd prefer to do some activities with other people, like going for a bike ride, as it's more motivating and I generally find it more fun. I'm also fine doing it on my own and happy to do that, but I like riding with company


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:05 pm
Posts: 2582
Free Member
 

I was married for 18 years two kids a few relationships in my 40s but my partner now lives 55 miles away so its just weekends and holidays together and it works great as we get space through the week, chat for an hour most days
5 years now never argue or fall out


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:05 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

ton - Member
regardless of your thoughts. we were born to reproduce. FACT

we were also born to consume. There's a reproduction/consumption balance that needs to be achieved.

The concept of overpopulation new to you?

We were also born to do a lot more things that just these basic components of existence.

We aren't a simple organism.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:07 pm
Posts: 34376
Full Member
 

and don't see it changing

With your crystal ball, you could make a fortune


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:09 pm
Posts: 1083
Full Member
 

We aren't a simple organism.

Some are simpler than others. Fact.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:11 pm
Posts: 10333
Full Member
 

An hour or so of piece and quite is nice, but I'd rather be with people generally. I always prefer riding with mates. I just get more out of a ride if others are there to share the experience. Even if that is just looking at a view...


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:13 pm
 chip
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I live alone and I am currently single,
I can get quite lonely sometimes but don’t think I could live with anyone As my ocd would not allow it.
Just the thought of someone rearranging my cupboards is enough to put me off. 😀


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:21 pm
Posts: 3601
Free Member
 

OP is a bit tied up today...

[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:23 pm
Posts: 0
Full Member
 

Completely happy in solitude, never ever found the need to interact with others if I don't want to.

I've always been at the centre of a group in work, ever since I first started working I seemed to be included from day one.. then that built to what I do now. Always on the go and being in contact with colleagues and the wider network means I've no real need to crave human interaction.
The Mrs has her life, I have mine, we mix and mingle and share and care like everyone I know.

I don't agree Humans are here to reproduce. I think thats just a fallacy and we should have from early times just continued to die of disease and petulance, thing is Humans are a caring type deep down and our craving for medical help and assistance means we're lasting longer and reproducing easier.. I'm not too sure thats the right way for humans to exist. We should have the right to an Off Button and decide when it's our time to go, not someone elses decision (medical reasoning here) and rightly or wrongly depending on your view cap reproduction at some level (I don't mind being flamed here, it's just my view long held and I'm happy with it)

And, I've no kids... so my life is my own and I so made the right life choice there. Buuuuttt... I do love kids, couldn't eat a whole one though..


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:24 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
Topic starter
 

With your crystal ball, you could make a fortune

Lol, I don't doubt I could meet the 'one' etc etc, I guess I just meant I don't feel any unease at not having a long term partner or kids etc

For the record I don't feel anti social, I spend plenty of time with family and friends. I spend quite a bit of time courting female company. I ride in a club, I'm one of the organisers and I'll go do sportives etc just as a social thing, but I guess I also ride alone a lot! I just find choosing to be on my todd is equally rewarding as an activity choice.

The question wasn't desperately serious, I think I was just more interested to hear the view's of others.

Edit - also lol's @ unfitgeezer 😀


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:27 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Spend a lot of time with my own company as I live alone and mainly ride solo. Love it!

Happy to spend a day with friends and (certain members of...) my family but any more than a day or two and I crave a bit of solitude. I meet a lot of people every day I work so I think I just get person burnout a lot of the time. Even living in a city is doing my but in these days, can't wait to move back to the countryside.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:30 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

ton - Member
regardless of your thoughts. we were born to reproduce. FACT

Now I've done my bit for the species can I be solitary?


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:40 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I've been married once, had a long term partner from which my daughter was born she is now 27..have been with my current partner for 19 years and have a 14 year old son ..in between times I have lived on my own .
I have never been happier than I am with my current missus ..but I have realised that I can be difficult to live with ...
As for being happy in my own company ..yes completely ..most of my waking hours are spent on my own ..but I really do enjoy the company of others.
I do find it hard though to forgive and forget if someone 'does me wrong ' ..so patience isn't my strongest trait ..


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:45 pm
Posts: 7321
Free Member
 

I'm sure that there a few on here more than capable of falling out with themselves in the absence of others...

For my part, yes I am more than happy in my own company. This is probably a good thing being that I am "between roles" at the moment. I must admit that as I've gotten older I find that I don't quite crave company the same as I used to do. I'm more than happy with a good book or working out solo at the gym. If I am in company then I prefer a smaller gathering. A lot of the time I can't really be bothered. Family gatherings used to be fun but now consist of the same recycled conversations.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:52 pm
Posts: 12
Free Member
 

I've had enough Myers Briggs assessments through work to understand where I sit on the (supposed) introvert/extrovert scale.

I also know that my desire for company or solitude varies down to the activity and other factors.

So, although I've been very happy in my relationship for the last 21 years and with our daughter, there are times when I do just want to be left alone.

I work best in a team - and certainly think best when kicking ideas around with others - but there are plenty of times when I'm happy to crack on by myself and don't want the hindrance of others. Sadly when you're leading others that can be a challenge...!

When I rode bikes, I loved being in a club and the camaraderie of club rides or racing together. But outside training rides, I came to prefer to ride alone. The solitude was always very calming.

A solo pizza and a couple of pub stop-offs sounds as ideal as a meal with friends and family.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 1:55 pm
Posts: 30656
Free Member
 

OP's post just reads as normal behaviour.


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 2:03 pm
Posts: 4111
Free Member
 

If we were all the same it would be a boring world!


 
Posted : 13/11/2017 2:44 pm

6 DAYS LEFT
We are currently at 95% of our target!